Butches: how do you like to be treated on a date?

[MysticOceansFL]

I would have to say both parties on the first date shouldn't really be expecting anything from each other except polite and honesty.

[Hey You]

I like to do the gentleman thing- opening doors and stuff. I like to pay, even though I'm not exactly rich. I feel uncomfortable if anyone who isn't a really good friend or well-established girlfriend pays for anything for me. But I enjoy paying on dates and stuff. So I like to do that.
Some physical contact. Just spending time and talking is nice, but it's not enough. I want to cuddle if we're in a cinema or sitting somewhere close together. Hold hands while walking or across the table. A kiss goodnight if it went well.
The whole dinner and stuff is nice but I also really like simple dates. A couple of the nicest dates I've ever been on we walked along the walkway by the river after dinner.

As for specifically how I like to be treated- As an equal but with an acknowledgement that I am at the butch end of the scale. Don't try to 'treat me like a lady', I want to do that for you and I will be annoyed and probably offended if you try it on me. I'm not going to mother you, but let me take care of you a bit. Let me pull my phone out for the purpose of showing you pictures of my animals and probably my motorbike. I love those things. Pull your phone out to show me pictures of the things or people you love the most. Have an intellectual conversation with me, challenge me mentally. Give me something to think about after the date. I will enjoy your presence more if you stimulate my mind as well as my body. Having said that, discussions about sex (although probably not the real thing on the first date) are welcome at any time. Lol. People with dirty minds are much more interesting than people with clean minds.

It's really late. Depending how this thread goes I may come and contribute again. But I hope this much helps

[Hey You]

Anyone else care to comment? This is actually a really interesting question.

[RockOn]

Treated with respect, kindness ... if she likes me on the first date and I like her too, it feels good to me to be lightly touched on the arm, shoulder, thigh ... it feels sort of like a subtle gesture of fondness to me.

Once on a first date, I knocked on her door with a bouquet of roses. When she opened the door, she grabbed my hand, yanked me inside and literally swallowed me whole. I did not like that. Felt way too cheesy ... as in a cheap-themed movie.

Subtle will get my attention.

[Redsunflower]

Brilliant thread tiaras-and-books.

*bump*

[ForeverMe]

I'm gonna take a turn giving a gentle bump on this one. I think it's a great topic.

[tiaras-and-books]

One more bump. I really like hearing what you all have to say.

[Roman]

Originally Posted by RockOn

Treated with respect, kindness ... if she likes me on the first date and I like her too, it feels good to me to be lightly touched on the arm, shoulder, thigh ... it feels sort of like a subtle gesture of fondness to me.

Once on a first date, I knocked on her door with a bouquet of roses. When she opened the door, she grabbed my hand, yanked me inside and literally swallowed me whole. I did not like that. Felt way too cheesy ... as in a cheap-themed movie.

Subtle will get my attention.

This is exactly how I feel. I greatly appreciate subtle gestures. To me, there is a lot of power in a subtle gesture. it takes great attention to detail and talent to make a move at the right time in the right way. A few people have mentioned respect. Mastering subtle gestures is definitely a way to show respect. It means you've taken enough interest to realize that being too "touchy-feely" will overwhelm me especially if I haven't been around you much before.

[Tuff Stuff]

I still like it when they want to rip my clothes off on the first date..but that's just me.*sigh*

[homoe]

I'd like to take priority on a first date! I mean for gods sakes put your phone away and live in the moment! Other than good conversation and your full undivided attention, I'm good!