Corny jokes - Page 21

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-11-2014, 04:55 PM

I would imagine that if you understood Morse code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy!

Mel C. · 06-11-2014, 05:27 PM

Have you heard about the movie "Constipation"?
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Of course not, it hasn't come out yet

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-12-2014, 04:56 AM

Kobi · 06-12-2014, 09:47 AM

Degotoga · 06-12-2014, 11:46 AM

While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!"

Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad.

Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her.

Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?"

gotoseagrl · 06-12-2014, 02:22 PM

What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with fireworks?
(Dino-mite!)

What's as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing?
(Her shadow!)

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-12-2014, 07:02 PM

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-13-2014, 03:19 AM

Kobi · 06-13-2014, 06:20 AM

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-13-2014, 06:40 PM

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-14-2014, 03:39 AM

gotoseagrl · 06-14-2014, 09:39 PM

What do you give a sick bird?
(Tweet-ment)

What do you give a sick pig?
(Oink-ment)

Why did the banana go to the doctor?
(Because it wasn't peeling well!)

BestButchBoy · 06-15-2014, 10:46 AM

then it dawned on me.

ksrainbow · 06-16-2014, 05:34 PM

When does it rain money? When there is "change" in the weather.

What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud

What's worse than raining buckets? Hailing taxis!

Can Bees fly in the rain? Not without their yellow jackets

How do lightning bolts flirt? They electrocute each other

Candelion · 06-17-2014, 01:15 PM

Did you know James Bond once slept through an earthquake?
He was shaken, not stirred.

BestButchBoy · 06-17-2014, 03:17 PM

An instagram.

Happy_Go_Lucky · 06-17-2014, 06:03 PM

Janstevie · 06-19-2014, 12:29 PM

Did you hear about the guy who got run over by a steam train? He was chuffed to bits.

JustLovelyJenn · 06-19-2014, 04:32 PM

Candelion · 06-19-2014, 07:33 PM

Why should you never date a tennis player?

Because love means nothing to them.

06-12-2014, 11:46 AM	#405
Degotoga Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: Respectful and situational appropriate ones Relationship Status: Enjoying butchelorhood Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Texas Posts: 3,301 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 7,390 Thanked 4,380 Times in 1,233 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, "No honey for you for one month!" Later that afternoon, Johnny's dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. "That's it! No butter for you for one month!" says his dad. Later that evening as Johnny's mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?" __________________ Don't try to explain yourself to stupid people. You're not the jackass whisperer.

06-12-2014, 02:22 PM	#406
gotoseagrl Senior Member How Do You Identify?: old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?: mermaid, very lucky babygirl Relationship Status: Saltwater mermaid ♡ Join Date: May 2010 Location: CA Posts: 2,209 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,192 Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with fireworks? (Dino-mite!) What's as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing? (Her shadow!) __________________ Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence

06-14-2014, 09:39 PM	#412
gotoseagrl Senior Member How Do You Identify?: old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?: mermaid, very lucky babygirl Relationship Status: Saltwater mermaid ♡ Join Date: May 2010 Location: CA Posts: 2,209 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,192 Thanked 6,103 Times in 1,727 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	What do you give a sick bird? (Tweet-ment) What do you give a sick pig? (Oink-ment) Why did the banana go to the doctor? (Because it wasn't peeling well!) __________________ Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence

06-15-2014, 10:46 AM	#413
BestButchBoy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Male ID Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 3,925 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 406 Thanked 5,438 Times in 2,037 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went then it dawned on me.

06-16-2014, 05:34 PM	#414
ksrainbow Member How Do You Identify?: Valued Relationship Status: UNO Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Kansas Posts: 773 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,759 Thanked 2,192 Times in 573 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	6.05 thus far since 6/1/14... When does it rain money? When there is "change" in the weather. What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud What's worse than raining buckets? Hailing taxis! Can Bees fly in the rain? Not without their yellow jackets How do lightning bolts flirt? They electrocute each other

06-11-2014, 04:55 PM	#401
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	*I would imagine that if you understood Morse code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy!*

06-11-2014, 05:27 PM	#402
Mel C. Long-time Member How Do You Identify?: WIB - woman identified butch Preferred Pronoun?: Your choice...not really a button for me Relationship Status: ♡ married 1/1/2019♡ Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: San Diego Posts: 2,149 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,772 Thanked 6,828 Times in 1,621 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	Have you heard about the movie "Constipation"? . . . . . . . . . Of course not, it hasn't come out yet

06-12-2014, 04:56 AM	#403
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

06-12-2014, 09:47 AM	#404
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,617 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474860

06-12-2014, 07:02 PM	#407
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

06-13-2014, 03:19 AM	#408
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

06-13-2014, 06:20 AM	#409
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,617 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474860

06-13-2014, 06:40 PM	#410
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

06-14-2014, 03:39 AM	#411
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

06-17-2014, 01:15 PM	#415
Candelion Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: she/her/you Relationship Status: He can till my field. Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Canada Posts: 1,317 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,396 Thanked 4,029 Times in 895 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Did you know James Bond once slept through an earthquake? He was shaken, not stirred.

06-17-2014, 03:17 PM	#416
BestButchBoy Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Male ID Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 3,925 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 406 Thanked 5,438 Times in 2,037 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	How Much Does A Hipster Weigh? An instagram.

06-17-2014, 06:03 PM	#417
Happy_Go_Lucky Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Butch who desires femme company. Preferred Pronoun?: Handsome devil you. Join Date: Nov 2012 Location: Anywhere I want to be Posts: 677 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 3,203 Thanked 3,365 Times in 627 Posts Rep Power: 21474849

06-19-2014, 12:29 PM	#418
Janstevie Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Soft Butch Relationship Status: single Join Date: May 2010 Location: England Posts: 1,814 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 112 Thanked 1,331 Times in 411 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Did you hear about the guy who got run over by a steam train? He was chuffed to bits.

06-19-2014, 04:32 PM	#419
JustLovelyJenn Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She/her Relationship Status: That's Need to Know Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Aberdeen, WA Posts: 4,478 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 12,464 Thanked 13,991 Times in 3,684 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	A little musican humor for the World Cup __________________ --Jenn

06-19-2014, 07:33 PM	#420
Candelion Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: she/her/you Relationship Status: He can till my field. Join Date: Jan 2014 Location: Canada Posts: 1,317 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,396 Thanked 4,029 Times in 895 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Why should you never date a tennis player? Because love means nothing to them.