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[curlyredhead]

Originally Posted by Satiated

I've debated for the last hour, whether I wanted to post my ramblings here or not. I tend to be a private sorta lady, but my need to understand has overwhelmed me so, here I be.

1. This isn't a medical question, more an emotional one directed at the Males partaking in this thread.

2. Where as my ex partner isn't here to add his two cents, I have nothing ill to say. He was a dynamite butch befor his transition, and now is just an incredible guy after.

For the most part, I have tossed around the idea of dropping the status label of lesbian these days, and just referring to myself as femme. Why you wonder, I'm blubbering about this here? Because randomly 5 years ago, my long term butch girlfriend stated she wanted to become a man and transition. I was shocked, angry, sad and various other things. Bottom line, I supported her right up till he was born.

Surgeries, hormones, and varies other things rocked us apart, but I remained diligent. I loved this persons soul. At this stage, I considered us a hetro couple. Something, I'd never thought I'd say, do or be. But, I did.

Things smoothed after the initial year, and then the confession came. " I can't date a lesbian, you like women. " I said yes, that's a fact, but I also love you, and you are male.

To no avail he dumped me, to date straight women.

Yet, here I see many Ftm's surrounding themselves with all sorts of labels.

So, all this rambling aside...

Have any of you males that transitioned ever felt your current (or at the time partner) looked at you as being anything but whom you are now?

My previous partner and I had this issue. However, the biggest difference between our situation and yours was I had already transitioned to male when we had met. But whenever we had fights or disagreements about things, we would end up having a discussion about how she identifies and about how I identify. That discussion was about her identifying as a Lesbian. This wasn't the first time it had happened to me, I would explain to her if you want to be with a woman, I am not the person for you because I can't give you that. She understood but it was still an issue. Long story short we are no longer together, that reason doesn't have to do with her identifying as a lesbian though.

[JDeere]

Have any of you gentleman dated a bisexual woman? One that sleeps with both men and women but is monogamous when in a relationship? If so, how did it go?

By men I mean CIS gendered males.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by JDeere

Have any of you gentleman dated a bisexual woman? One that sleeps with both men and women but is monogamous when in a relationship? If so, how did it go?

By men I mean CIS gendered males.

No. I have dated women who have been with cis males in the past, but no women that have identified as bisexual.

I have not dated since I started transitioning. My preference would still be to date a femme. At this point, a femme who is attracted to trans men.

[Liam]

Originally Posted by JDeere

Have any of you gentleman dated a bisexual woman? One that sleeps with both men and women but is monogamous when in a relationship? If so, how did it go?

By men I mean CIS gendered males.

Yes. Yes. From great dates to three year long relationships, I have dated several bisexual women. They went well in several different areas, I have no regrets.

[JDeere]

Thank you Dapper and Liam for your feedback!

Me and my Lady haven't had much issues with her sexuality but I think she gets a tad confused about me being trans and what it all entails, trying to educate someone who loves you is kinda hard, IMO.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by JDeere

Thank you Dapper and Liam for your feedback!

Me and my Lady haven't had much issues with her sexuality but I think she gets a tad confused about me being trans and what it all entails, trying to educate someone who loves you is kinda hard, IMO.

Would she be willing to read something on it?

This book gives a pretty good overview and is pretty cheap on Amazon:
https://play.google.com/store/books/...AE3g&gclsrc=ds

The other thing to get across to her is that gender is fluid for a lot of trans people. Not everyone is binary, male or female. So, you have to learn about your specific trans partner, trans friend, etc.

Has she always only dated cis females? How does she identify?

[JDeere]

Originally Posted by DapperButch

Would she be willing to read something on it?

This book gives a pretty good overview and is pretty cheap on Amazon:
https://play.google.com/store/books/...AE3g&gclsrc=ds

The other thing to get across to her is that gender is fluid for a lot of trans people. Not everyone is binary, male or female. So, you have to learn about your specific trans partner, trans friend, etc.

Has she always only dated cis females? How does she identify?

She might be willing to read and she has only dated CIS males and CIS females and she ID's as bisexual. I am the first trans person she has ever come across or dated.

[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by JDeere

She might be willing to read and she has only dated CIS males and CIS females and she ID's as bisexual. I am the first trans person she has ever come across or dated.

I think her being attracted to both genders would be a good thing in your case (you describe yourself as transmasculine human) Anyway, it makes sense to me that perhaps she could be completely fulfilled sexually/emotionally , but only she knows that. I mean she is with you, right? So, she must be attracted to you!

Unless she tells you she needs to be able to relate to both sexes intimately in order to be fulfilled, I don't see why you would concern yourself with her being able to be monogamous.