Orange is the New Black: Season 3

[HoldMeSteady]

Originally Posted by dykeumentary

The dad seems to be asking her for a more traditional gender presentation (clothing) in the childhood sequence, and I was wondering if it would become about gender presentation. Then later at the hospital, he asks her about her gender/class presentation again. She responds about her sexuality.
The crazy bible guy at the hospital just walked into a set-up.

I thought the writing was interesting because the deLaria's character didn't handle the last 2 interactions very well at all. I wonder if the writers were showing why the character had regrets about not saying bye to her mom. Also I wonder if the average viewer will still think gender presentation is the same as sexuality.
A friend told me to watch the episode because she wanted to see I thought the butch was presented fairly. (I am clearly the AUTHOR-AH-TAY on all things butch!)
Anybody have thoughts on this?

I have mixed feelings and thoughts about this interaction. Boo could have (probably should have) worn nicer male or androgynous clothes to visit her parents at the hospital. But what does she do about her hair and piercings? And although her father gives an interesting perspective on costumes, I'm not sure they're really talking about costumes. For one thing, Boo's father didn't have to wear a dress to work. He could still maintain his gender integrity. Secondly, I think for Boo and her parents, gender and sexual orientation are bound up. Their fight about her sexual orientation has obviously gone on for years and one of the battle grounds has been Boo's gender presentation. Would her father have been okay if she had shown up in nicer masculine clothes? And wouldn't asking Boo to change her gender presentation be just as damaging as asking her to hide her sexual orientation?

Another thought which seems somehow related to this, is that I have known butches, especially years ago, who always dressed more feminine when dressing up. Probably, because of the danger, they didn't wear suits or tuxedos.

Finally, in answer to your question, I do believe that many people still think that gender and orientation is the same thing, or at least closely related. Judging, at least, from my limited personal experience, they are somewhat related. I've only met one man who feels a lot like a woman inside (who doesn't want to transition) who is heterosexual. But I've met many gay feminine men. I only know a couple of women who feel somewhat male identified (who don't want to transition) that are heterosexual, but the vast majority of the butches I meet are gay (or sometimes bi).

Just my widely ranging thoughts. I felt a bit conflicted by that episode.