Neurodiversity

[Liam]

Originally Posted by katzietootle

someone help...
do anyone here knows how to manage visual stims?i dealt with verbal stims and other self stimulatory behaviours but i'm having a hard time managing visual stims...

I practice energy tapping, and it helps me.

http://www.powells.com/biblio/1-9781572245556-0

[violaine]

" . . . I once watched a fairy-like child walking through the park on her tiptoes. She was probably nine or 10. She knew exactly what was supposed to happen at various times of the day but didn’t know the word for grass. Such fey unworldliness might indeed seem magical to some and threatening to others. . . "



http://carnalnation.com/content/5571...s-syndrome-sex

[christie]

This young man brought tears to my eyes - all three times I watched this. His performance was just brilliant.

[violaine]

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/08/i...c-a-crime.html

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by violaine

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/08/i...c-a-crime.html

Thank you for posting this. I hope a lot of people will read it.

It is frustrating police or no when behavior you have no control over is seen as being rude or mean or devious.

How many times I have to say the words "there is no hidden agenda".

I berate myself and appologize an incredible amount. My friends say it is annoying and I need to stop it. I am not even sure how. Especially today.

I am not understanding anything. I am spinning. My schedule is all weird I guess, C is at her Grandmother's and my dog of 15 years died a couple of weeks ago and the house feels so different.

Sorry and thank you!

xoxoxoxo

[violaine]

jen, i'm really sorry about the recent loss of your dog losing a close family member is so difficult, and i hope that you will be gentle to yourself right now.

i also understand the feelings of frustration with the 'no hidden agenda' situation. repeat.repeat.repeat. there's more to write about this, and it gets very confusing to me too, so you're not alone!

do you think some of the police or not 'projection' of DA being 'mean, rude, and devious' simply stems from a lack of capacity [wiring] to even go deeper and/or to see outside of self, with compassion - in some, maybe it just isn't there ?

in that case, what do you do- keep apologising?

[suebee]

This is a story similar to Violaine's: an eighteen year old autistic boy was picked up by the police and held in jail because they thought he was drunk. I think his real offense was "walking while autistic".

[christie]

Originally Posted by violaine

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/08/i...c-a-crime.html

Originally Posted by cybersuebee

This is a story similar to Violaine's: an eighteen year old autistic boy was picked up by the police and held in jail because they thought he was drunk. I think his real offense was "walking while autistic".

Belle and Sue -

Thank you both for posting these stories. I think that awareness training for our emergency responders and our law enforcement agencies is needed more than ever and I am encouraged at the number of agencies taking steps to do so.

There has recently been a new awareness site launched.

http://awaare.org/

There are forms that you can print out and complete and take to your local law enforcement/emergency response agencies to make them aware of family members and their challenges. I have them on my desk to complete and take to our local sheriff's office and to drop off at the volunteer fire dept down the street. Even as functional as Bratboy is, I worry about how he might react during an emergency situation and this might be a way to prevent something unfortunate.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by violaine

Jen, I'm really sorry about the recent loss of your dog losing a close family member is so difficult, and i hope that you will be gentle to yourself right now.

i also understand the feelings of frustration with the 'no hidden agenda' situation. repeat.repeat.repeat. there's more to write about this, and it gets very confusing to me too, so you're not alone!

do you think some of the police or not 'projection' of DA being 'mean, rude, and devious' simply stems from a lack of capacity [wiring] to even go deeper and/or to see outside of self, with compassion - in some, maybe it just isn't there ?

in that case, what do you do- keep apologising?

Thank you for your kind words about Mac, She was 15 and everyone loved her. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make. I laid next to her and held her the entire time.

I think the police as are afraid every moment they are at work, so many of them are killed in the line of duty, that they are taught to look for signs and to see anger or not answering as a threat. Hopefully as more people are open about AS and Autism, there will be more training and understanding for them. Also parents like Christie who fill out paperwork and take it to emergency responder personnel help too.

I apologize because conflict freaks me out and when I was a kid, no one knew about AS, so it was always deemed my fault if I did not react appropriately as the daughter of Southern Baptist Missionaries. I was in the spotlight 24/7 which makes me very jumpy. When I get that feeling, I apologize and apologize and don't trust that I am actually right. I berate and berate myself. Maybe because it seems familiar? I am in therapy and we are working on this.

xoxoxoxxoxo

Thank you for reading and for your kindness!

I hope everyone has a great day!

[violaine]

thank you, jen.

this sentence has nothing to do with SB's in general- or is against your family.

there were a few SB's in my family growing up, and i clashed with them big time because i questioned 'hypocrisy' whenever i saw it. without apologies.

hang in-

ox

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by violaine

thank you, jen.

this sentence has nothing to do with SB's in general- or is against your family.

there were a few SB's in my family growing up, and i clashed with them big time because i questioned 'hypocrisy' whenever i saw it. without apologies.

hang in-

ox

I experienced total hypocrisy and thought something was wrong with me that I could not act how they wanted me to, be what they wanted me to be. I even look stressed in my baby pictures.

I questioned constantly from age 3 on and was abused because of it and because my adopted father was crazy....but that's another discussion.

No one knew about AS, even if kids wrote with left hand they were abused back then. Teachers were usually mean, and kids allowed to bully. Plus I was in another country back and forth. A coping mechanism I learned was to apologize whether or not I think I am wrong. I do it when I think I have offended, whether or not what I said was in my opinion offensive. Make sense?

I am really working on the apologizing thing.

xoxoxx

[violaine]

yes, jen. you make perfect sense.

anyone who knowingly causes people to doubt their own 'perceptions' is doing a lot of harm to the child/person, and i would imagine themself.

i'm glad you're talking to someone :bunchflowers:

[violaine]

http://aspergeradults.ca/

[Liam]

Originally Posted by violaine

http://aspergeradults.ca/

Thank you, for introducing me to this blog, violaine, while reading her work, I came across this statement, which really hit home.

Having Aspergers is that living paradox of understanding so much, being blessed with amazing intellectual and thinking capacity – a very quick mind – and yet, that not mattering, socially at all.

[christie]

Originally Posted by Liam

Thank you, for introducing me to this blog, violaine, while reading her work, I came across this statement, which really hit home.

Having Aspergers is that living paradox of understanding so much, being blessed with amazing intellectual and thinking capacity – a very quick mind – and yet, that not mattering, socially at all.

Liam -

Thank you for these words. I was reading the blog for a moment earlier (playing catchup at work - moments are few) and thought that it was an amazing site. I cant wait to have the time to dig into it.

One things I was thinking about today is how I once heard a description of being an aspie as being a freshwater fish trying to live in a saltwater world. I think that is one of the reasons I have tried so hard to assist Bratboy in finding ways to accomodate the NT world we live in - because it becomes so apparent that there is little progress in that world accomodating him.

[Apocalipstic]

Thank you for posting that link Violaine! What a great blog.

Many of the people I work with are artists and musicians and my partner is/has ? AS too, so sometimes I forget how difficult it can be out on the world until it slaps me in the face.

I especially like the post asking if we have empathy, as we discussed the other night I think we really do, but people might not see that from how we seem outwardly. I have always been mystified by what seems to be a huge disconnect between what I am actually thinking and what some people perceive or decide that I am thinking and communicating.

Also, the focus on change. The people who expect us to change and how much time we spend on it. And who are we trying to change for?

Lot's to read and process...will be back after I have read more.

[violaine]

i am glad you are enjoying the link. i found her blogs some time ago, and she keeps entries up to date, which is nice. maybe i should write and thank her for providing such great information.

jen, i used to say that i 'have' autism- because that's what i heard from NTs! i am on the spectrum. also, there are damaging statements being said/heard all of the time, like these: 'she has communication issues. [my wiring is different- not an 'issue' to ME]; she doesn't try.[what kind of expectations/standards are being set? have they been communicated - and if possible, taken into account that i'm a visual learner, perhaps shown to me - with patience?]; she does x.y.z deliberately. [this one slays me and has since childhood! i am not an inflexible person who cannot see roundly]; she is aware of x.y.z.' - [true! i'm very observant! this last remark is not meant as a compliment, however]. . . i could go on until i ran out of space here! where do those thoughts / projections come from, and why? the blog explains it really well, i think.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by violaine

i am glad you are enjoying the link. i found her blogs some time ago, and she keeps entries up to date, which is nice. maybe i should write and thank her for providing such great information.

jen, i used to say that i 'have' autism- because that's what i heard from NTs! i am on the spectrum. also, there are damaging statements being said/heard all of the time, like these: 'she has communication issues. [my wiring is different- not an 'issue' to ME]; she doesn't try.[what kind of expectations/standards are being set? have they been communicated - and if possible, taken into account that i'm a visual learner, perhaps shown to me - with patience?]; she does x.y.z deliberately. [this one slays me and has since childhood! i am not an inflexible person who cannot see roundly]; she is aware of x.y.z.' - [true! i'm very observant! this last remark is not meant as a compliment, however]. . . i could go on until i ran out of space here! where do those thoughts / projections come from, and why? the blog explains it really well, i think.

The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

[Liam]

I just watched Adam, a movie about a fellow aspergian. Has anyone else seen it? What did you think of it?

[violaine]

[QUOTE=apocalipstic;162503]The same thing my teachers said when I was little...if she would apply herself...try harder...change...listen...change...getting the right answer is not good enough...she must show her work...even if the answer pops in her head...stop her from counting with her fingers...she needs to make decisions faster...she is in her own little world and cares for no one but herself...she reads too much...she needs to stop drawing during class...it won't help her future to memorize all those train stations and maps...

Love the blog!

did you ever try to explain to the teachers that you were listening, thinking, feeling, following, understanding . . . only to be met with something ELSE [negatively stated] about your tone of voice ? ? ? being called 'argumentative' in responding to how they so wrongly perceived you?