Social anxiety disorder.

[LediskoLove99]

I have horrible social anxiety disorder, which is definitely fun to deal with.

So usually when I join a forum my first thought is "Really? You can barely hold a conversation with most family members without wanting to cry, how do you expect to communicate with people you don't even know?"

But lately I've been trying to kind of force myself to throw myself out there, this is my small step. So why not join a social anxiety forum? Been there, done that. I found it hurt more than it helped.

So here I am, just trying to give myself a little nudge in the right direction, hopefully with people I can relate to a little more. And hopefully in the end I won't make an ass out of myself or not bother posting out of fear.

Because honestly, when you're stuck in your house most of the time because you can't leave without wanting to run back in and hide, when you can't go to a grocery store without almost having a breakdown in the middle of everything, when you lose most of your friends because you don't want to do the same things they do because you're terrified of how many new people will be there or you're just not fun anymore, when you're way too fucking timid to even disagree with someone even on the important issues, you know you have a big problem and you need to take a step back and really try to do something about it. So here is my first little step. And it's scary as hell.


I'm not one to constantly bitch, and I definitely try not to sit here and feel sorry for myself. But sometimes you just feel the need to let it all out, even if it's to a bunch of people you have never met, ironic.
There was no point to this really, just kind of felt like sharing. And hoping maybe there's one or two of you out there who know how it feels.