What advice would you get your younger self

jools66 · 12-31-2015, 10:10 AM

I thought this would be an interesting thread.
Going into a new year, and as we do sometimes look back at the year that as just passed this thought popped into my head.
i was wondering what you all would say to your younger self, whether it be last year,10 years ago, 20/30 or more.
What have you learned and how have you grown from it?
What would you do differently if anything.

For me personally, i would say dont be afraid to open up, to someone you can trust. dont hold the bad inside you because thats not good.
You are stronger than you think, so never give up.
Enjoy life and what is as to offer, and try to learn something new about it and yourself when you can.
oh and dont get married at 20 lol

MsTinkerbelly · 12-31-2015, 10:41 AM

The grass is not always greener somewhere else...just stay home, love your wife and thank God for your blessings.

Rockinonahigh · 12-31-2015, 11:43 AM

To my younger self: I know it's hard not to hurt when both parents walked out on you as a baby, they were and always will be childish self centered brats. You still have yourself, learn all you can so you can take care of your self then live well. Don't get married at 19...wrong move cause you will forever pay for that. Another thing, don't pay any attention to any one who blast you about the way ward parents you aren't them and will rise above what they will ever be. Be wary of people who act like friends then turn on you when they are done with you, yes you will get burned a time or two and it will hurt like hell its called life lessons we all get them. The word NO isn't a bad word to say learn it early and use it wisely. So much more to say, but later.

gotoseagrl · 12-31-2015, 12:33 PM

Just wait. And listen to your first instincts.

Daniela · 12-31-2015, 01:55 PM

Don't flip, it's not the end of the world (unless it is).

clay · 12-31-2015, 02:13 PM

Love harder, live wiser, and have no regrets (of which I have very few). Every.single.event. has made me who I am today!! I have lived a pretty decent life....made a few wrong turns, but again, made me wiser, and so much more appreciative!!!

DapperButch · 12-31-2015, 04:01 PM

Transition already! For both yourself and for those around you. You are a much better person after you become your real self.

Jesse · 12-31-2015, 04:10 PM

Grab hold of yer boot straps son and pull like hell, it's gonna be a wild ride!

princessbelle · 12-31-2015, 04:18 PM

Be true to yourself and wait....just wait. The tides a'comin. Patience my dear self. Good things come to those who wait.

Oh and also a big ole hug.

Amulette · 12-31-2015, 07:18 PM

Move to Argentina and study Tango. Raise your son dancing. Really it's OK...

JDeere · 12-31-2015, 08:29 PM

I would say to my younger self that stop the partying and focus on life.

Gemme · 12-31-2015, 08:57 PM

I would say to listen to my gut. When I listen to it, it never lets me down.

Kätzchen · 12-31-2015, 09:19 PM

During my young adult life, clear up until a couple years ago, I never could really wrap my arms around the idea that I am truly a fabulous woman. It's just been this past two years that I experienced my own "ah ha" moment when I could fully embrace myself as a person worthy of my own kind of fabulosity (1).

Second, always trust your inner intuition, even if others might not come up with the same inner-knowing. Your inner instincts will pretty much be right on target, most all the time.

Kelt · 12-31-2015, 09:36 PM

In the "trust your gut" department; I would say to my younger self to pay attention when issues of the mind collide with issues of the body. While not in medical vogue right now, that connection runs deep, to ignore it is folly.

I would also tell my younger self to truly appreciate the moment. You never know when doing that favorite thing whether or not it will be the last time you get to do it.

The most important thing I have is time. Everyone gets the same number of hours in the day. Everything else is decoration.

Shystonefem · 12-31-2015, 09:53 PM

Your heart is bigger than anyone can handle. Don't stop caring and don't be with someone who demands you stop caring.

Save as many as you can, never eat red meat or pork because they should not suffer just because you like bacon burgers.

DO NOT get in the truck with Leon. Believe me, it will save both your lives in different way.

Rockinonahigh · 01-01-2016, 03:32 AM

Younger self, another bit of hind sight, slow down chasing that big rainbow then enjoy what you have for as long as you can but don't take any sh85 from anyone. There will be people on the rodeo trail that would love to put doubts in your mind about you and you horses abliatie (sp). You are doing fine...they would love to see you off that horse you are on and on something not near as good, it's money in the bank for them if you cant win.

job · 01-01-2016, 03:52 AM

Grow up sooner, as in: plan for your future and don't be so hedonistic....ya little shit.

Orema · 01-01-2016, 05:49 AM

I'd tell my younger self, you're pretty AND black, not pretty BUT black. We'd have a long discussion on that misconception.

I'd also tell her that you're gonna make a few mistakes along the way and not always trust the right people, but that's okay. It's even expected. What's important is to walk inside your story and own it. Otherwise, you will walk outside your story and will have to hustle for your worthiness. (excellent advice from Brene Brown)

Be more forgiving of others and more compassionate and empathic to yourself.

Start saving early. Yes, there will be time later, but start early—you'll be glad you did.

cinnamongrrl · 01-01-2016, 07:13 AM

Stay in school. Its very hard to return....

Move to Asheville sooner. I wish my kids had grown up immersed in this environment

Do more of the things that interest you... hobbies are important too

Be better at being present

Be careful who you give your heart to

Daniela · 01-01-2016, 09:43 AM

Stop doubting yourself so much. There's nothing fundamentally wrong with you, even though you may think there is.

12-31-2015, 10:10 AM	#1
jools66 Member How Do You Identify?: lesbian Relationship Status: Married Join Date: Mar 2013 Location: uk Posts: 289 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 192 Thanked 696 Times in 227 Posts Rep Power: 3251484	What advice would you get your younger self I thought this would be an interesting thread. Going into a new year, and as we do sometimes look back at the year that as just passed this thought popped into my head. i was wondering what you all would say to your younger self, whether it be last year,10 years ago, 20/30 or more. What have you learned and how have you grown from it? What would you do differently if anything. For me personally, i would say dont be afraid to open up, to someone you can trust. dont hold the bad inside you because thats not good. You are stronger than you think, so never give up. Enjoy life and what is as to offer, and try to learn something new about it and yourself when you can. oh and dont get married at 20 lol

12-31-2015, 12:33 PM	#4
gotoseagrl Senior Member How Do You Identify?: old-fashioned queer stone submissive girl Preferred Pronoun?: mermaid, very lucky babygirl Relationship Status: Saltwater mermaid ♡ Join Date: May 2010 Location: CA Posts: 2,209 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,192 Thanked 6,104 Times in 1,726 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	Just wait. And listen to your first instincts. __________________ Be still when you have nothing to say; when genuine passion moves you, say what you've got to say, and say it hot. D. H. Lawrence

12-31-2015, 02:13 PM	#6
clay Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Butch (Silver Fox) Dom Daddi Preferred Pronoun?: 50 Shades of Clay Darker & Deeper Relationship Status: married to my forever Join Date: May 2011 Location: salt air & sandy beaches Posts: 13,136 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 97,015 Thanked 31,701 Times in 7,748 Posts Rep Power: 21474863	Love harder, live wiser, and have no regrets (of which I have very few). Every.single.event. has made me who I am today!! I have lived a pretty decent life....made a few wrong turns, but again, made me wiser, and so much more appreciative!!! __________________ To find someone who will love you for no reason, and to shower that person with reasons, that is the ultimate happiness. ~Robert Brault

12-31-2015, 04:01 PM	#7
DapperButch Roadster Guy How Do You Identify?: FTM, Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: He Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Northeast Posts: 7,745 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 26,545 Thanked 26,838 Times in 5,771 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Transition already! For both yourself and for those around you. You are a much better person after you become your real self. __________________ -Dapper Are you educated or indoctrinated?

12-31-2015, 04:10 PM	#8
Jesse Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Transguy Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: Central West Coast of Florida Posts: 5,204 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 34,866 Thanked 17,783 Times in 3,940 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Grab hold of yer boot straps son and pull like hell, it's gonna be a wild ride! __________________ “You’re so hard on yourself. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that widened you, at the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this.”

12-31-2015, 10:41 AM	#2
MsTinkerbelly Timed Out - TOS Drama How Do You Identify?: ... Preferred Pronoun?: ... Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: ... Posts: 6,573 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,737 Thanked 22,925 Times in 5,021 Posts Rep Power: 0	The grass is not always greener somewhere else...just stay home, love your wife and thank God for your blessings.

12-31-2015, 11:43 AM	#3
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,936 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	To my younger self: I know it's hard not to hurt when both parents walked out on you as a baby, they were and always will be childish self centered brats. You still have yourself, learn all you can so you can take care of your self then live well. Don't get married at 19...wrong move cause you will forever pay for that. Another thing, don't pay any attention to any one who blast you about the way ward parents you aren't them and will rise above what they will ever be. Be wary of people who act like friends then turn on you when they are done with you, yes you will get burned a time or two and it will hurt like hell its called life lessons we all get them. The word NO isn't a bad word to say learn it early and use it wisely. So much more to say, but later.

12-31-2015, 01:55 PM	#5
Daniela Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: married Join Date: Nov 2014 Location: Jersey City Posts: 2,065 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,382 Thanked 5,243 Times in 1,243 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Don't flip, it's not the end of the world (unless it is).

12-31-2015, 04:18 PM	#9
princessbelle Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: femme Preferred Pronoun?: femme ones Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Tennessee Posts: 6,100 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,380 Thanked 30,499 Times in 5,201 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Be true to yourself and wait....just wait. The tides a'comin. Patience my dear self. Good things come to those who wait. Oh and also a big ole hug. __________________ ~ I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ~ Maya Angelou

12-31-2015, 07:18 PM	#10
Amulette Member How Do You Identify?: Ma chérie, a sweet thing. Preferred Pronoun?: feminine Relationship Status: Following the scent of flowers. Join Date: Aug 2014 Location: La vie bohem Posts: 489 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 544 Thanked 796 Times in 232 Posts Rep Power: 0	Move to Argentina and study Tango. Raise your son dancing. Really it's OK...

12-31-2015, 08:29 PM	#11
JDeere Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Transgender Preferred Pronoun?: He/him/his Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Jul 2014 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 17,752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 31,018 Thanked 28,845 Times in 9,708 Posts Rep Power: 21474864	I would say to my younger self that stop the partying and focus on life.

12-31-2015, 08:57 PM	#12
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,496 Thanked 108,178 Times in 25,669 Posts Rep Power: 21474887	I would say to listen to my gut. When I listen to it, it never lets me down. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.

12-31-2015, 09:19 PM	#13
Kätzchen Member How Do You Identify?: . Join Date: May 2010 Location: . Posts: 15,839 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 31,630 Thanked 33,387 Times in 10,548 Posts Rep Power: 21474866	During my young adult life, clear up until a couple years ago, I never could really wrap my arms around the idea that I am truly a fabulous woman. It's just been this past two years that I experienced my own "ah ha" moment when I could fully embrace myself as a person worthy of my own kind of fabulosity (1). Second, always trust your inner intuition, even if others might not come up with the same inner-knowing. Your inner instincts will pretty much be right on target, most all the time.

12-31-2015, 09:36 PM	#14
Kelt Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Beach Butch Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: SoCal Posts: 2,751 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 19,765 Thanked 15,318 Times in 2,539 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	In the "trust your gut" department; I would say to my younger self to pay attention when issues of the mind collide with issues of the body. While not in medical vogue right now, that connection runs deep, to ignore it is folly. I would also tell my younger self to truly appreciate the moment. You never know when doing that favorite thing whether or not it will be the last time you get to do it. The most important thing I have is time. Everyone gets the same number of hours in the day. Everything else is decoration.

12-31-2015, 09:53 PM	#15
Shystonefem Member How Do You Identify?: Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Shy for President Join Date: May 2014 Location: NH Posts: 1,105 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 5,475 Thanked 3,672 Times in 897 Posts Rep Power: 21474848	Your heart is bigger than anyone can handle. Don't stop caring and don't be with someone who demands you stop caring. Save as many as you can, never eat red meat or pork because they should not suffer just because you like bacon burgers. DO NOT get in the truck with Leon. Believe me, it will save both your lives in different way. __________________ Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. ~Lao Tzu

01-01-2016, 03:32 AM	#16
Rockinonahigh Senior Member How Do You Identify?: stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: makes no diffrence,I know who I am. Relationship Status: single,maybe looking if the right person comes along. Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: shreveport,Louisiana Posts: 4,907 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,682 Thanked 14,936 Times in 3,938 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Younger self, another bit of hind sight, slow down chasing that big rainbow then enjoy what you have for as long as you can but don't take any sh85 from anyone. There will be people on the rodeo trail that would love to put doubts in your mind about you and you horses abliatie (sp). You are doing fine...they would love to see you off that horse you are on and on something not near as good, it's money in the bank for them if you cant win.

01-01-2016, 03:52 AM	#17
job Junior Member How Do You Identify?: butch Join Date: Mar 2015 Location: Vegas area Posts: 47 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182 Thanked 159 Times in 35 Posts Rep Power: 644258	Grow up sooner, as in: plan for your future and don't be so hedonistic....ya little shit.

01-01-2016, 05:49 AM	#18
Orema Superlative Soul Sister How Do You Identify?: Lesbian Stone Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Moving in a single file Join Date: Dec 2013 Location: Cottage of Content Posts: 13,474 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 41,414 Thanked 34,743 Times in 8,923 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	I'd tell my younger self, you're pretty AND black, not pretty BUT black. We'd have a long discussion on that misconception. I'd also tell her that you're gonna make a few mistakes along the way and not always trust the right people, but that's okay. It's even expected. What's important is to walk inside your story and own it. Otherwise, you will walk outside your story and will have to hustle for your worthiness. (excellent advice from Brene Brown) Be more forgiving of others and more compassionate and empathic to yourself. Start saving early. Yes, there will be time later, but start early—you'll be glad you did.

01-01-2016, 07:13 AM	#19
cinnamongrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?: wild woman Relationship Status: No, thank you. Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time… Posts: 7,651 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 15,175 Thanked 27,593 Times in 6,949 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Stay in school. Its very hard to return.... Move to Asheville sooner. I wish my kids had grown up immersed in this environment Do more of the things that interest you... hobbies are important too Be better at being present Be careful who you give your heart to __________________

01-01-2016, 09:43 AM	#20
Daniela Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: married Join Date: Nov 2014 Location: Jersey City Posts: 2,065 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,382 Thanked 5,243 Times in 1,243 Posts Rep Power: 21474849	Stop doubting yourself so much. There's nothing fundamentally wrong with you, even though you may think there is.