Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers!

[clay]

That is indeed very good news, and much needed! Having TC is awesome and a great morale booster for you. That in itself is the BEST medicine!

I, too, just abhor anyone telling me I HAVE to do something. "chuckling"...

Glad you were able to check in & give a positive news update.

Naps are good. Rest is so essential to everything else.

Sends you & TC big hugs, my friend!

[BullDog]

Pynk, I'm so glad you got good news! Thank you so much for asking about all of us.

Yes, I see the Oncologist Specialist this Monday - the 29th. I'm glad I can finally see her. Hopefully, I will get more information on what I have and get the ball rolling on treatment. I feel I've been waiting around forever.

This week has been hard. My pain meds don't seem to be working as well as they used to. Most of the pain is in my legs. It hurts really bad. I had a big ordeal getting my meds re-filled so I'm just going to wait until Monday to see what the doctor says. I don't feel too bad today so far. I will check back after my appointment if I have any news.

I hope everyone has a good weekend and upcoming week and all my best wishes on your recovery.

[BullDog]

I had my appointment with the oncologist today. I like her and also her assistant. I feel I am in very good hands. I am having surgery on September 19 to remove a mass on my uterus, have a hysterectomy, and maybe a few other things lol. My doc said they won’t know for sure if the mass is malignant or not until it is removed and tested. But she said it is concerning and definitely needs to be removed. I agree. Never thought I would look forward to surgery but I want that mass gone. It is causing me a lot of pain.

It’s weird. September 19 was me and one of my ex’s anniversary. A very special love for me.

Thank you so much for all the support here and you have my support as well. Reach out anytime.

[clay]

Hey.......very happy to hear this news. Finally, moving toward having answers & hopefully, pain relief.

That is awesome you gelled with the surgeon and assistants. That is huge.....sends you positive energy vibes....YOU! GOT! THIS!!

Know I am in this with you, Bulley.....


I had my appointment with the oncologist today. I like her and also her assistant. I feel I am in very good hands. I am having surgery on September 19 to remove a mass on my uterus, have a hysterectomy, and maybe a few other things lol. My doc said they won’t know for sure if the mass is malignant or not until it is removed and tested. But she said it is concerning and definitely needs to be removed. I agree. Never thought I would look forward to surgery but I want that mass gone. It is causing me a lot of pain.

It’s weird. September 19 was me and one of my ex’s anniversary. A very special love for me.

Thank you so much for all the support here and you have my support as well. Reach out anytime.

[nina03]

I had thyroid cancer last year, which was successfully treated with surgery and radioactive iodine. I'm past due for my year scan, let alone my six month scan which I missed. I feel frozen about it. I'm usually so proactive about health stuff, and I've just been putting it off. My Dr has messaged me twice now to get my ass in gear. How do you overcome fear- based inertia regarding cancer care? I KNOW that I need to get on this. I know if it came back catching it early is key to effective treatment, but somehow my brain and my fear aren't communicating about this one. Thanks for any advice or thoughts you might have.

[clay]

Hi nina03......

It is always a challenge when faced with or facing a cancer diagnosis.And each person handles this in differing ways. I know I was scared to death when the dr called me to say I had both uterine AND colon cancer. The DR also told me I would have to have concurrent surgeries...a long, arduous one at best. My gynie did my total hystero first while the second team stood by to follow with my colon resection, appendectomy, & couple other things. As I prepared for that, I kept my thoughts positive (having to work hard at that) because my mind tried to instill negativity in me.

Our minds are a terrible force of energy sometimes. Perhaps you could discuss with your partner, ask for support positively, & talk to your support group??!!

I will send you positive energies that you will align mind/heart to go for your follow ups. Others will chime in here also, and offer sage advice.

Tell yourself you HAVE to do this for your own health, have "talks" with your mind that YOU are alpha & are going to face this & get them done.

All of us have had many different types of cancer here, & following up is a challenge most of us face or have faced. BUT we always have each other's back, rallying behind those affected, & just being resent for anyone who comes in here.

There are no magic answers, just kind compassion & words of encouragement. You will do this when you are ready, on your terms. I believe in you!!!

Gentle hugs, nina......am here if you need me.....clay


I had thyroid cancer last year, which was successfully treated with surgery and radioactive iodine. I'm past due for my year scan, let alone my six month scan which I missed. I feel frozen about it. I'm usually so proactive about health stuff, and I've just been putting it off. My Dr has messaged me twice now to get my ass in gear. How do you overcome fear- based inertia regarding cancer care? I KNOW that I need to get on this. I know if it came back catching it early is key to effective treatment, but somehow my brain and my fear aren't communicating about this one. Thanks for any advice or thoughts you might have.

[nina03]

Hi nina03......

It is always a challenge when faced with or facing a cancer diagnosis.And each person handles this in differing ways. I know I was scared to death when the dr called me to say I had both uterine AND colon cancer. The DR also told me I would have to have concurrent surgeries...a long, arduous one at best. My gynie did my total hystero first while the second team stood by to follow with my colon resection, appendectomy, & couple other things. As I prepared for that, I kept my thoughts positive (having to work hard at that) because my mind tried to instill negativity in me.

Our minds are a terrible force of energy sometimes. Perhaps you could discuss with your partner, ask for support positively, & talk to your support group??!!

I will send you positive energies that you will align mind/heart to go for your follow ups. Others will chime in here also, and offer sage advice.

Tell yourself you HAVE to do this for your own health, have "talks" with your mind that YOU are alpha & are going to face this & get them done.

All of us have had many different types of cancer here, & following up is a challenge most of us face or have faced. BUT we always have each other's back, rallying behind those affected, & just being resent for anyone who comes in here.

There are no magic answers, just kind compassion & words of encouragement. You will do this when you are ready, on your terms. I believe in you!!!

Gentle hugs, nina......am here if you need me.....clay


Hi Clay,
Thank you for your endless kindness. I appreciate it so much. I never joined a support group when I was diagnosed. I didn't even tell many people about it, including most of my family. My sister and I talked about it and decided that given our parents' health challenges it would be better for them not to know, but it ended up isolating me. I didn't share it with many of my friends, either, though my partner's family knew.

I think I'm going to set goals to get this done. First, I'll do the blood work, then I'll schedule the scan. The scan takes more than a week of prep. I have to be on a low iodine diet for a week before the scan. I just need to get it done. It's better to know what's going on. Thank you again for your kind response. I'm also here and glad to be a support to anyone who needs it in this process.
Nina

[clay]

You are so very welcome! I am really impressed seeing your....one step at a time....one day at a time....plan of action. YOU CAN DO THIS!!! You have the heft & weight of me behind you, encouraging you all the way. The other amazing warriors here will be here, too. That is the beauty of this inclusive group of warriors.

YOU are a warrior, my friend. I totally understand your keeping it to yourself, and for being protective of your parents. You have this "support group" right here. Feel free to post, vent, feel all the very raw emotions that wax & wane as you go through cancer diagnoses, treatments, & follow ups!! We understand, we "get" you!! We "GOT" you!!

Some of us in here are nurses, and even we have fears when facing the C dx. It can be so overwhelming at times.

I believe in YOU, my sweet friend! I believe YOU can take it one minute, one hour, one day, one step at a time!!

Am always here, Nina!! Gentle hugs & take care of you!!! clay


Hi Clay,
Thank you for your endless kindness. I appreciate it so much. I never joined a support group when I was diagnosed. I didn't even tell many people about it, including most of my family. My sister and I talked about it and decided that given our parents' health challenges it would be better for them not to know, but it ended up isolating me. I didn't share it with many of my friends, either, though my partner's family knew.

I think I'm going to set goals to get this done. First, I'll do the blood work, then I'll schedule the scan. The scan takes more than a week of prep. I have to be on a low iodine diet for a week before the scan. I just need to get it done. It's better to know what's going on. Thank you again for your kind response. I'm also here and glad to be a support to anyone who needs it in this process.
Nina

[clay]

I have had so many squamous cell cancerous spots removed from left forearm in a year....12 to be exact, with another one coming up next week. I JUST had one removed from right hand 4 weeks ago, and have had 14 or so off my face, and a fresh biopsy Monday this week.
Now with having said that, I happened to research mult SCC's....my % of having these metastisize is almost 30% now. I DO NOT like those #'s.

My wife just ordered me 3 new UV shirts with sleeves & 3 pair of baggy below knee shorts. I just can NOT wear sunscreen...it is messy, makes greasy spots on my clothes, I accidentally rub it in my eyes....so, long sleeves & my UV hat now.

Saw my pulmo today for 6 months FU....will be getting new scan of chest to see status of my 4 lung nodules. Started with 2 a year ago, then March 2022 grew to 4 & doubled in size. Scan is 09/19/22. Oh, a happy note, my pulmo looked at me today, she said, Donna, you look like you are 40 yrs old. You DO NOT LOOK your true age. She said you are relatively healthy, but you are so positive, always smiling, & enjoying your life! You LIVE life, she knows we go camping almost every month year round, and I always show her pictures, or tell her about new vegan recipes I have made. We are like best friends. We always hug & I tell all my Dr.'s I love them every time I see them. I have an incredible bevy of them!!!

I see my oncologist Oct unless these scans show anything differently.

I am going to be seeing a pain management specialist, to try & get my fibro, polyarthritis quieted down some.

My whole left side is a ball of spasms...:(.

Going into this positively, will face whatever outcome is, head on! I have amazing support team, including all of you in this group. My wife is so amazing!

I am looking ahead to great outcomes with pain management & my scan results!!

Gentle hugs to all of you...I <3 you all! clay

[nina03]

I have had so many squamous cell cancerous spots removed from left forearm in a year....12 to be exact, with another one coming up next week. I JUST had one removed from right hand 4 weeks ago, and have had 14 or so off my face, and a fresh biopsy Monday this week.
Now with having said that, I happened to research mult SCC's....my % of having these metastisize is almost 30% now. I DO NOT like those #'s.

My wife just ordered me 3 new UV shirts with sleeves & 3 pair of baggy below knee shorts. I just can NOT wear sunscreen...it is messy, makes greasy spots on my clothes, I accidentally rub it in my eyes....so, long sleeves & my UV hat now.

Saw my pulmo today for 6 months FU....will be getting new scan of chest to see status of my 4 lung nodules. Started with 2 a year ago, then March 2022 grew to 4 & doubled in size. Scan is 09/19/22. Oh, a happy note, my pulmo looked at me today, she said, Donna, you look like you are 40 yrs old. You DO NOT LOOK your true age. She said you are relatively healthy, but you are so positive, always smiling, & enjoying your life! You LIVE life, she knows we go camping almost every month year round, and I always show her pictures, or tell her about new vegan recipes I have made. We are like best friends. We always hug & I tell all my Dr.'s I love them every time I see them. I have an incredible bevy of them!!!

I see my oncologist Oct unless these scans show anything differently.

I am going to be seeing a pain management specialist, to try & get my fibro, polyarthritis quieted down some.

My whole left side is a ball of spasms...:(.

Going into this positively, will face whatever outcome is, head on! I have amazing support team, including all of you in this group. My wife is so amazing!

I am looking ahead to great outcomes with pain management & my scan results!!

Gentle hugs to all of you...I <3 you all! clay

Hi Clay,
Thanks for sharing what is going on with you. I hope that the new scans have good news. I was wondering if you have ever looked at powder sunscreen? I can send you links if you're interested. I love your positive attitude towards the things you're dealing with. It isn't just helping you, it's helping me, so thank you.

Since I last posted, I got the ball rolling for my needed tests. I have an appointment tomorrow for the blood work I need to do before my scan, and I also scheduled an ekg at the same time. I'm starting a new arthritis medication that can cause heart issues so they want me to get the EKG before starting then again two weeks after I start to make sure it's ok. I've been sitting on that for two months. After I get this stuff done, I can schedule the scan.

Thanks for the support and encouragement.
Nina

[clay]

Hey Nina:

You are so very welcome.

And thank YOU for your kind words & support. It helps to have others' share with us.

I would love to have the link, pls. Does it have "talc" in it? If so, then no.....:(.

Last night I had severe bone pain in upper arms & wrists...so much so I was crying with it. Finally caved & took a pain med. I am scheduling with a pain management clinic!!!

It is a gorgeous day, starting a holiday weekend. Artemis 1 is set to lift off Saturday at 217pm , eastern time!

I am keeping an eye on the tropics also....we have Danielle slated to become a TS or worse...:(.

Leaving everyone a hug.

Keep up the positive steps, Nina. I love it!!!


Hi Clay,
Thanks for sharing what is going on with you. I hope that the new scans have good news. I was wondering if you have ever looked at powder sunscreen? I can send you links if you're interested. I love your positive attitude towards the things you're dealing with. It isn't just helping you, it's helping me, so thank you.

Since I last posted, I got the ball rolling for my needed tests. I have an appointment tomorrow for the blood work I need to do before my scan, and I also scheduled an ekg at the same time. I'm starting a new arthritis medication that can cause heart issues so they want me to get the EKG before starting then again two weeks after I start to make sure it's ok. I've been sitting on that for two months. After I get this stuff done, I can schedule the scan.

Thanks for the support and encouragement.
Nina

[nina03]

Clay, I'm sending you a message with that link! Wasn't sure if we are allowed to post links to products in the threads.

[BullDog]

My doctor got more information that I likely do have uterine cancer. My surgery has been bumped up to Tuesday, Sept 13. I'm so glad it is sooner. I am in so much pain. Hopefully, I will get some relief from the surgery.

I hope everyone is doing well.

[clay]

My doctor got more information that I likely do have uterine cancer. My surgery has been bumped up to Tuesday, Sept 13. I'm so glad it is sooner. I am in so much pain. Hopefully, I will get some relief from the surgery.

I hope everyone is doing well.

The diagnosis is not too much of a "surprise" BUT having a much earlier surgery date is great to hear! Talk to you soon, my friend!

[clay]

Thinking of you, Bulley, as you are on the eve of your surgery! I will be in touch as soon as you feel up to talking! YOU! GOT! THIS! You will feel so much better when you get this done!! Big hugs, J!

Here for you, reach out this evening if you wish......stay positive & focused!!

[clay]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((everyone of us going through cancer right now))))))))))))))))))))))

I REALLY do care about each of you!

Wraps you all into my arms.....YOU! EACH! GOT! THIS!

[clay]

Good evening:

I have permission from Bulldog to post an update for her.

She does has Stage 4 cancer & will be taking treatments soon.

Her spirit is good, she is slowly progressing with her rehab.

You can message me, to pass along any messages for her. Send her positive energies & healing vibes....I will make sure she gets those. I am in close contact with her!!

At this time, she is focused on getting better & getting her treatments, so is not on any social media.

Thank you all, I know many of you love & care for her, as I do!!

Big hugs!!!!

You got this, Bulldog!!

[clay]

Good evening pynk:

Just checking in to see how you are doing?

Leave us an update when you can, pls...thinking of you....fondly...clay

[pynkkameleon]

Good evening pynk:

Just checking in to see how you are doing?

Leave us an update when you can, pls...thinking of you....fondly...clay

You have such a beautiful heart Clay. Thank you for caring about and checking in on all of us.

I’m sad to learn that Bulldog has these challenges ahead. Please pass on my thoughts of comfort, healing and well wishes for a speedy recovery from surgery. It sounds like she has a great team of doctors behind her and that her spirit is strong. Please continue to keep us all posted.

I’m doing okay. I’ve been pretty fatigued lately and back to napping like I’m Rip Van Winkle **Zzzzz…** Two days ago I went in for my monthly checkup and infusion and found out that my I’m neutropenic and extra susceptible to infections. The Doc put me on a short break from the Ibrance in order to get my numbers back up. It explains why I’ve been so sleepy, sluggish and have been having issues with mouth and nose sores etc. Cancer truly is the gift that keeps on giving.. This Friday I have a brain MRI to rule out mets as the cause of my headaches. I’m not too concerned about that being the cause but it’ll be good to get a baseline.

Glad to hear that you’ll be seeing the Onco soon and that you’re getting in to see pain management. It sounds like you have a pretty spectacular relationship with your entire team of doctors. That doesn’t surprise me in the slightest. You have that way about you.

Nina- Hopefully your labs came back good and you can get your scans done soon.

Kätzchen And Canela- How are each of you doing?

How’s everyone else doing?

Sending big love and good juju out into the universe for each of you. Be good to you 💜

[BullDog]

Thank you for giving the update Clay! She has been amazing support for the entire time. I do have stage 4 uterine cancer which is serious. I had a hysterectomy, Fallopian tubes and other bits taken out, a colostomy, and an appendectomy.

I was so weak at first but now able to walk short distances. I talked to my doctor today. I am getting out of the hospital later today. I thought I was going to have to go to rehab for 2 weeks but I don’t. Also my colostomy is temporary. I am ecstatic with all this great news.

I do have to start chemo in 3-4 weeks so more to do. But I have an amazing doctor and incredible family and friends - many of whom are facing their own very serious challenges. Yet still they support me. I am so grateful and love them all very much.

I hope everyone is doing well. I want to hear how all of you are doing and let me know if I can do anything to help.

[clay]

Hey V!!! Really glad to see this update, but sorry to hear of the issues related to Ibrance, etc. Have you tried any of the biotene drops for your mouth? They have a whole slew of products available. IF you can't find them, let me know & I will make sure you get some!!

My LTR partner had same issues as you are having, I found them, & she LOVED them.

Nystatin swish & swallow....she had thrush from her chemo wiping out immune system.

Big ole hugs...and you are making me blush. Your kind words are so appreciated, my dear friend.

I DO have an awesome rapport with my docs!!! They call me personally with any updates, concerns, etc!

Take care.....be gentle with you!!!




You have such a beautiful heart Clay. Thank you for caring about and checking in on all of us.

I’m sad to learn that Bulldog has these challenges ahead. Please pass on my thoughts of comfort, healing and well wishes for a speedy recovery from surgery. It sounds like she has a great team of doctors behind her and that her spirit is strong. Please continue to keep us all posted.

I’m doing okay. I’ve been pretty fatigued lately and back to napping like I’m Rip Van Winkle **Zzzzz…** Two days ago I went in for my monthly checkup and infusion and found out that my I’m neutropenic and extra susceptible to infections. The Doc put me on a short break from the Ibrance in order to get my numbers back up. It explains why I’ve been so sleepy, sluggish and have been having issues with mouth and nose sores etc. Cancer truly is the gift that keeps on giving.. This Friday I have a brain MRI to rule out mets as the cause of my headaches. I’m not too concerned about that being the cause but it’ll be good to get a baseline.

Glad to hear that you’ll be seeing the Onco soon and that you’re getting in to see pain management. It sounds like you have a pretty spectacular relationship with your entire team of doctors. That doesn’t surprise me in the slightest. You have that way about you.

Nina- Hopefully your labs came back good and you can get your scans done soon.

Kätzchen And Canela- How are each of you doing?

How’s everyone else doing?

Sending big love and good juju out into the universe for each of you. Be good to you 💜

[clay]

B][COLOR="Blue"]BULLY!!!!

DAMN that is awesome news!!! It makes my heart sing for your progress AND for your positive attitude!!!! That makes a HUGE difference!


We already talked, so you KNOW how happy I am!! I called my wife & we were both crying! She & I love you so very much, J!!!!

I love being here for you, dood!!!

Go gently, baby steps, do not over do!!!!




Thank you for giving the update Clay! She has been amazing support for the entire time. I do have stage 4 uterine cancer which is serious. I had a hysterectomy, Fallopian tubes and other bits taken out, a colostomy, and an appendectomy.

I was so weak at first but now able to walk short distances. I talked to my doctor today. I am getting out of the hospital later today. I thought I was going to have to go to rehab for 2 weeks but I don’t. Also my colostomy is temporary. I am ecstatic with all this great news.

I do have to start chemo in 3-4 weeks so more to do. But I have an amazing doctor and incredible family and friends - many of whom are facing their own very serious challenges. Yet still they support me. I am so grateful and love them all very much.

I hope everyone is doing well. I want to hear how all of you are doing and let me know if I can do anything to help.

[Kätzchen]

Thanks for asking about me, Pynk. We're in crisis mode at work and my health appts got pushed back until we solve our situation at work.

I'm doing okay. I hurt a lot, but my bones hurt the most. I'm in no big hurry but my medical providers are so helpful and encouraging me with alternative methods of treatment, which we talk about privately on our health care website -- almost daily -- we have a robust conversation about what we can do, once we get confirmation on the biopsy result.

Bulldog, your situation sounds entirely challenging. Please know that my partner and I send tons of positive energy your way.

And Pynk, we continue to keep you in our thoughts.


Sending wellness wishes to all,
~K. :bunchflowers: :candle: :candle::candle:

[clay]

CT Chest scan.....no new nodules, no bigger growths.

See Doc again soon. I do have a large, calcified granuloma in lower right lobe. Usually benign, form after pneumonia, lung infections, inhalants, etc. I am happy about this!!

Off for a long 5 day with my wife, camping at Salt Springs....can hardly wait to get into those 72 degree salt springs!!!

Take care everyone. We have no internet nor cell service at the forest.

Mad love to all of us, facing challenges of varying degrees.

Bully...stay out of trouble, dood!!

[rustedrims]

Hi to everyone...

Had my treatment yesterday at 10am. Did 2 hours in the chair. Ya know if I gotta go through this stuff I am very grateful it is with these people. They are good to me and make sure I am ok or need anything. They are all nice and caring nurses. However there is 1 nurse that I feel a little tension from. Don't know what I did or said to her for her to be like that to me. In the early times my sister or sister-in-law would go with me to my appointments. That nurse didn't stop talking to them. I tried to get in the conversation and she would talk around me or through me. My sister-in-law saw it to. She gets me checked in when I get there. I just follow her and do not talk to her. I feel the tension and I know she does also. Chatting with the nurse getting me hooked up I asked her if she got a chance if she could look up my last treatment. She looked it up and said it was October 17th 2023. Yeah couple more weeks.

Now the parking lot....
The the last 4 times I have pulled in the parking lot for my treatment I have to look for a spot to park with my choices of 2 or 3 spots. When I first started going I had the pick of parking spots. I always park in the spot farthest away from the door and get there 15 minutes early so I can sit quiet and listen to the radio a few minutes before I go in. I see people going in and coming out with bags. They are treatment people that have gotten or getting treatments. The bags have snacks drinks and puzzle books. My time is close to going in. After this song I gotta go in. Now I am 1 of those people caring a bag in the building. The longest walk of the day.It just makes me sad to see the increase of people that need help since I started going for my treatment.
Prayers for us all. We keep fighting together.

Thank you for reading and caring.

s

[Kätzchen]

Well... I just want to express my heart felt thanks to members here who have supported me all these years with friendship online and liking my posts.

You all have a very special place in my heart of hearts.

I see my physician tomorrow. She referring me out to an oncologist.

My cancer is both affecting my female organs and my bones in female organ areas. I won't know the extent of damage my cancer is causing until I get a bona fide result on another particular test... but up until a phone call reminder today, I have been taking a naturopath type medication which is produced locally at a certain pharmacy. It is a CBD/THC product which is mixed at a 1:1 ratio. I also take a strict CBD medication for the way my body hurts, constantly.

I am also cutting all my hair off, soon. I promise to look as sexy as I can during this extreme struggle for survival.

Yours truly,

~D.

PS/ lightning struck outside right now. It is rather odd to have a thunderstorm with lightning in October.


PS (again): Thanks for all the love and support. I heart you all. XOXO

[GeorgiaMa'am]

As I recently posted in another thread, the boi has lung cancer. We went to the first appointment with his pulmonologist today. The doctor showed us the x-ray; the mass is 10-15 cm in diameter, in hys right lung.

I went for moral support and also to take notes. My sister took notes for me at all my appointments when I went through cancer, and I found it extremely helpful.

We're just getting started with all the rounds of appointments and tests. They don't yet know the type of cancer or the stage. They will determine these after some more tests and then will develop a care plan. The boi is impatient; hy wants answers now, and has no idea how long and complicated a process this is going to be. I tried to give hym an idea, but I don't want to overwhelm hym.

This is all so familiar, and not in a good way. I want to be there to support hym, but it sure is bringing back some bad memories.

[clay]

As I recently posted in another thread, the boi has lung cancer. We went to the first appointment with his pulmonologist today. The doctor showed us the x-ray; the mass is 10-15 cm in diameter, in hys right lung.



This is all so familiar, and not in a good way. I want to be there to support hym, but it sure is bringing back some bad memories.

((((((((((((((((((((((((Georgia))))))))))))))))))

This IS a hard thing to see happening to a loved one, and yes, it DOES evoke one's own memories/experiences/diagnosis.

Just try to take it one step/day at a time. The visits initially are fast & furious, as it tantamount they get the stage then put a plan together. While we want them to "hurry up"...there are so many variables to consider for each person, as their "cancer" is unique to them. So, "specifics" are very important to create that plan. Patience is key, as you & I know. BUT I also know how scared one can be, with a whole spectrum of other emotions, going on. Hearing the C word scares the crap out of folks. I withdrew to myself for a week when I was diagnosed 12/2009 and told NO ONE.I had to ride that rollercoaster of emotions, thoughts, feelings....acceptance/denial/projection/etc etc and over again. IN NO ORDER!

I will stand with you from afar & offer gentle hugs, encouragement, support, a shoulder/ear.....just know you are NOT technically alone in this. We here will be with you. I know I will.

Allow yourself the time to absorb, digest, and come to terms with this as well. IT won't be easy, but you are NOT alone. Gentle hugs for you & the boi!!

[clay]

UPDATE:

Saw my oncologist today...my labs are screwed up. SO, I am getting a battery of imaging/scope tests just to make sure the elevated CEA (tumor marker levels) aren't "high" for any reason.

I have faith all will come back clean.

I am a survivor & I GOT THIS!

[GeorgiaMa'am]

I withdrew to myself for a week when I was diagnosed 12/2009 and told NO ONE.I had to ride that rollercoaster of emotions, thoughts, feelings....acceptance/denial/projection/etc etc and over again.



Now that you mention it, I did the same thing. I didn't tell anyone for awhile; I couldn't decide at first if I was even going to do anything about it. Then I couldn't decide who needed to know and who didn't. And I couldn't decide what order to tell them in. I had all kinds of thoughts at first, some crazy and some not so crazy.

Thanks so much for your support and sharing your introspection.

[GeorgiaMa'am]

The boi is starting to realize hy is going to need some help to get through this. Hy's on oxygen, and can barely make it to the bathroom or the kitchen without passing out from not being on the oxygen. The oxygen people are supposed to come tomorrow, and I told hym to ask for a longer line so hy can at least get to those two places in the house.

When I called the boi today, I asked hym how hy felt today. Hy said, "Unwanted." It made me so sad.

Hys son, who lives with hym, is not stepping up to the plate to help out. The son has health problems of his own, but he can't even be bothered to make an extra sandwich for his mom when he goes to the kitchen to make himself one. He can't get himself out of the bed at 6 a.m. to let the boi's dog out - he will just lie in bed for hours and listen to the dog bark and bark. (The last time the boi tried to do it, hy got dizzy and hit hys head on the door jamb.)

The boi's son is a known bum, but the boi won't kick him out. This is just how it is, and how it has been since the kid was born. (He's in his 40s now.) He plays video games all day. I would love to kick his a**, but it wouldn't do any good. But it would make me feel better.

Anyway, we're going to have to line up some help for the boi. I can't do everything - I can't even do all this stuff for myself. I might be able to take the dog. Or we might be able to get a dog walker. I told the boi hy's just getting started on this stuff, and it's going to get harder from here on for a while. Hy said we'll just have to take care of stuff as it comes to us, and hy's right.

[GeorgiaMa'am]

Thank you so much everyone for your kind words and for keeping us in your thoughts. It helps me so much and means a lot.

* * *

The boi is back in the hospital. Hys lung function is at 50%; hys right lung is completely blocked now by the tumor and hys left lung is doing all the work of keeping hym oxygenated. We finally got a hospital patient advocate to run interference; the billing people keep wanting to put off procedures until the boi has Medicare, and the doctors are saying they can't wait any longer. They are conducting the second biopsy today, and they are starting radiation. Apparently, the type of cancer that will be determined by the biopsy has no effect on the radiation treatment; it's the same for all types. We will have to wait for the biopsy results to start chemo, though.

All I can do to help hym at this time is to tell hym what radiation is like in detail. The son is taking care of the dog for now (probably). I'm going to file an extension on hys taxes; they are done, except hy needs to get some information that I can't get from the IRS. Hy doesn't owe anything, so there won't be any penalty. I feel pretty useless though. Thank the Goddess hy has the patient advocate on hys side now; she seems like a real tough lady.

[GeorgiaMa'am]

The boi has been through two rounds of radiation now, and they're doing a third biopsy tomorrow.

Most distressing to hym and me, right now, is that they're calling in the palliative care doctor tomorrow. He wants to meet with the whole family so that everybody is on the same page about what the boi's "options" are, and what the boi wants to do.

The boi doesn't see it as a conversation about "options", hy believes that they're going to tell hym hy has no options and hy is going to die. We have no way of finding out until the appointment tomorrow.

Hy still hasn't eaten in over a week. I made hym a squash casserole and I'm taking it tomorrow. I won't get my feelings hurt if hy can't eat it, but it's hys favorite thing that I cook. I figured it was worth a try. And besides, I needed something to take my mind off this palliative care conversation.

[rustedrims]

Been a while since I have posted and been in here. Reading and getting caught up with everyone brings back the memories of my beginnings of my journey.

The pressure in my head came and went and didn't pay much attention to it until it didn't go away. Older sister took me to the hospital had all the tests done. They said we will call you and sent me home. Of course it took forever for them to call. The call came and got my appointment to see the doctor. Not thinking it was anything more than a doctor visit. Time came for the appointment so got in the car and went to it like every appointment I ever had not thinking of the reason I was going. I went alone. Sitting in that room waiting for the Doctor. The silence was the loudest thing I ever heard. She came in and sat down beside me. We exchanged hello's and how are you feeling? Then she leaned slightly to me and opened the folder pointed at something and said you have cancer. I then asked now what do I do?

She explained the process. We talked a few more minutes then I left. I went out to my car and sat there a little bit then I called my friend 'T' and I told her and she cried with me sitting in the car on the phone still in the parking lot. Everyone knows the rest of the story.

Doing what I had to do everything going well. Months later CT scan shows a spot on my kidney. Got it back and treatments started. I had 3 treatments then few months later started treatments to keep that stuff away. Had to get a treatment every 8 weeks for 2 years. Been doing that and have 3 more left. I told the nurse that was hooking me up that the treatment doesn't hurt. It's the reason I am there. It hurts getting poked. I always ask them to tell me before they poke me. To me it's like I am at the top of the hill on a roller coaster ready to drop.

In the beginning family would go with me to my appointments see how things are going. I go to treatments myself come home. Make sure kitties have something to eat. I make a little snack for myself then take a nap to sleep the sleepy stuff off. A little girl sums it up real well. She said the worst thing about having cancer is knowing you have it.

Thank you all for reading my ramblings.

s

[rustedrims]

Been a while.
Well done with my 2 years of treatments every 8 weeks. I had to do that cause I got that stuff in my kidney. That was the second time for me. Kidney good and so am I. M.R.I. on my head next few days. Tuesday's at 10:00. I was gone from home bout 4 half hours from hook up to unhook. Just drove myself. I would sit out in the parking lot bout 20 minutes and listen to music
before I go in and leave. Couldn't get nicer nurses. My Dr. was from Japan. She was very nice and explained everything so I could understand.
I know things are different for me now. I am slippin a little and I catch myself then try to think it through what I missed. The past 3 days had a misunderstanding with my new vanity in my bathroom. I say the box was marked wrong so that's why I got the wrong one. After the third day today it was explained to me about the box. The lady was nice about it but we had to do a little bit of loud talking first. After she explained it to me then I get it. Long story short she personally took me around all the vanities and I ended up with better quality and nicer looking. Talked it all out and ended it with a friendly hug. Gotta go back in for a sink and she told me to get her when I am ready and I will.
Ya know after I got done at the store and drivin home I think I figured it out how I think now after that stuff got ahold of me. If this makes any sense to anyone. I am trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. By the time things are explained to me that I understand I can get the round peg to start to fit in the round hole but I can't get it in all the way. That's what I came up with.
I don't like that part of it. I try to compensate for what I am missing.
Have a project in the garage been wanting to get that finished. Worked on it the other day and struggled with it but I kept at it and did as much as myself would let me do. Doesn't look pretty but it is better than it was. Few more hours on it and it will be buttoned up. Gotta wait till my thoughts get there to finish it. Don't like that part either.
Ok that's all I got,

Thank You for reading my ramblings.
We are all fighting the fight together.

s...

[clay]

I wanted to let you all know Bully (Jules) passed away yesterday. She fought a long, hard battle but our peaceful warrior now soars the skies.

May you RIP, my sweet friend. It was an honor to walk this long battle you fought during your cancer treatments. You NEVER quit smiling & always had a sense of humor!

I will miss our chats, Bully! Soar high bully. You were very much loved & cherished, & you were my chosen family. I love you, Jules. RIP