Horrible Holiday Dishes!!!!

[Queerasfck]

Hello friends, frenemies, and other assorted sundries. As some of you may know, I am a bit of a when it comes to holidays. They take up too much time, expand my waistline, cause family fights, cost too much, the list goes on and on!

That being said, I do participate in most of them mostly due to the fact that I can be a spineless pushover who can't say no. So with that in mind I would like to give all of you an opportunity to post your worst holiday food experiences. Does Aunt Millie always make that gloppy green bean casserole no one can stand (yet no one tells her how gross it is so she brings year after year)......what about the upside down jello thing your sister makes that tastes putrid.....does your mother-in-law burn everything so it's beyond recognition but insists on saying "it's just a little crispy"?? How about the horrible brick-hard fruit cakes your girl makes every year and gives them out as "gifts" aka door stops.....

Post your horror stories here please, I'm dying to know I'm not the only one about to suffer as we approach Thanksgiving and the other holidays. I do a lot of the cooking now just so I won't be subjected to things I can't stomach, but my sister who is a horrible cook, will bring something (?) to share, at least now she will admit cooking not her strong suit. My mother has dropped (and served us) a turkey that fell on the floor! TRUE! Ahh the holidays. So many good times!!!

[kannon]

[princessbelle]

My mom's family comes down the weekend prior to Thanksgiving and they have their feast then. Of course, i work weekends so i never get to attend. This is a blessing to me honestly. All those women in the kitchen cooking, kids everywhere, it's hot in her house and it truly makes me smile that i simply "cannot be there" due to work.

Usually what i do is head over there after work and dig in the fridge for anything i see appetizing. There are some very strange things. But, one thing stands out to me. My Aunt Billy makes this dish every single year...it is jello, cottage cheese, fruit, and not sure what else is in it, i just call it Jello Shyt. It has always amused her that i call it that and she is always asking me to try it. Ummm. no.

However, last year, i folded, i did try it, finally. I hate to say it...but DANG IT WAS GOOD. I talked to her a few days ago and made sure she is making it again this year. I'm thinking not many try it cause there is always a lot left when i finally end up over there. It looks awful. Good. Saves more for me!!!!!

So really i have it pretty good. I work and don't have to deal with the "family" and still get to raid the fridge.

[Inked_Trinity]

But, one thing stands out to me. My Aunt Billy makes this dish every single year...it is jello, cottage cheese, fruit, and not sure what else is in it, i just call it Jello Shyt. It has always amused her that i call it that and she is always asking me to try it. Ummm. no.



What is it about Jello that people have to add strange things to it? My mom used to make green Jello with shredded cabbage and carrots in it......NASTY!

[JAGG]

Oh I have a good story. My dad always cooked the big Sunday and holiday meals. He was a great chef BTW. I was about 8yrs old or so, and was tasked with helping him. As instructed, I opened the can of cranberry sauce and put it on a plate. But there was some thing embedded in the sauce. So my dad pulled it out and it was a 1 inch long top part of a man's thumb . Minus the nail. My dad told me to toss it all in the trash and don't breath a word of it to anyone, because it would upset my grandmother too much.

[Medusa]

I do most of the cooking for my family during the holidays but one of my mean aunts is always on some weird diet and tends to bring things that are made with lots of artificial sweetener or oddly-made dishes inspired to keep everyone skinny.

One year, she brought a pumpkin pie made with pureed cauliflauer mixed with pumpkin sweetened with sweet and low and housed in a pork rind crust.

Not. Kidding.

[ruby_woo]

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

[Medusa]

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

Yeah, WTF is that about? I have a cousin who does that and swears by it. *shiver*

[PinkieLee]

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

Originally Posted by Medusa

Yeah, WTF is that about? I have a cousin who does that and swears by it. *shiver*

A lot of folks do that here, too! Ugh, keep the oysters outta my dressing!
*reminds myself to keep some Stove Top in the cabinet just in case*

[always2late]

This isn't about an "ick" dish...more like a minor disaster. My mom worked nights for years when I was growing up. We have a big extended family and we would all gather at one or the others' house for a holiday. My parents chose to have Thanksgiving at our house. Because my mom was exhausted come Thanksgiving morning, I usually did the cooking. This one year we were having about 20 people to dinner, so I got up early, put the turkey in the oven (it was HUGE), and spent the rest of the morning and early afternoon getting everything else ready. When the turkey was just about done, my dad decided he needed to "take a look at it". He opened the oven and pulled out the rack...but when he pushed the turkey back in, he pushed the PAN that the turkey was in, not the rack. The rack tipped, spilling grease into the back of the oven, resulting in a huge grease fire. I had to take the turkey next door to my aunt's house (thankfully she lived close), and put it in her oven, wait until our oven cooled off, and then clean out burned on turkey grease.

Fun Fun Fun....gotta love the holidays.

[Rockinonahigh]

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

I know it sound yucky,bu really if its made right its pretty good,BUT I really prefer stuffing to be made the old fashion normal way.

Once may years ago when I hadnt got my head together I was married to the french guy from the back woods of little river Louisiana..when I say his folks live way out im not kidding( he was in big oil,lots of moola 3 gollege degrees in anything to do with oil)....anyways they had this family friend who was reputated to be one hell of a cook.Well gess what,if u think oysters in dressing is bad...she ,made her dressing with blood sasuage..big yuck...aint no way never gonna be hungry enough in this life or the next to let this pass my lips and call it food.

[chai~]

OMFREAKIN'GAWD!!!!!!!!

Originally Posted by JAGG

Oh I have a good story. My dad always cooked the big Sunday and holiday meals. He was a great chef BTW. I was about 8yrs old or so, and was tasked with helping him. As instructed, I opened the can of cranberry sauce and put it on a plate. But there was some thing embedded in the sauce. So my dad pulled it out and it was a 1 inch long top part of a man's thumb . Minus the nail. My dad told me to toss it all in the trash and don't breath a word of it to anyone, because it would upset my grandmother too much.

[Medusa]

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

I read your description.

Ebon said, "That sounds good."

The fucker didn't want to try my friend's spiced pumpkin bread (and which I wound up giving him half of cuz he loved it like I knew he would) but he thinks that's good.

With cherries.

Deer. Cherries.

Two things that should NEVER come together in one dish.

: pukeface :

[sara-bera]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

Your HR department is providing you all with therapy after that, yes?

[Lynn]

My mother makes the best jello concoction--red jello, chock full of whole cranberries, pineapple, apples, and walnuts. It's amazing. I've tried to make it a few times, but it won't set up. I don't think she's giving me the full recipe.

My sister-in-law is doing Thanksgiving this year. It's a big undertaking, and I'm appreciative of her efforts. I wish she didn't steam everything, including the turkey. A little spice and salt would go a long way, too. I never thought I'd prefer my mother's overdone bird to a fairly moist one with no flavor.

We live far away from everyone, or we could invite them to the best Thanksgiving meal, ever. It would, however, include the notorious green bean casserole!

[T4Texas]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

OMG, I am laughing so hard I am crying.

[dixie]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

Damn! I'm southern as fuck and even I wouldn't eat that. :ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww:

[Cowboi]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

GAG.......

[JAGG]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

hahahahah ROFL omg that's too freakin funny.