Horrible Holiday Dishes!!!!

[JAGG]

Oh I have a good story. My dad always cooked the big Sunday and holiday meals. He was a great chef BTW. I was about 8yrs old or so, and was tasked with helping him. As instructed, I opened the can of cranberry sauce and put it on a plate. But there was some thing embedded in the sauce. So my dad pulled it out and it was a 1 inch long top part of a man's thumb . Minus the nail. My dad told me to toss it all in the trash and don't breath a word of it to anyone, because it would upset my grandmother too much.

[Medusa]

I do most of the cooking for my family during the holidays but one of my mean aunts is always on some weird diet and tends to bring things that are made with lots of artificial sweetener or oddly-made dishes inspired to keep everyone skinny.

One year, she brought a pumpkin pie made with pureed cauliflauer mixed with pumpkin sweetened with sweet and low and housed in a pork rind crust.

Not. Kidding.

[ruby_woo]

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

[Medusa]

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

Yeah, WTF is that about? I have a cousin who does that and swears by it. *shiver*

[PinkieLee]

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

Originally Posted by Medusa

Yeah, WTF is that about? I have a cousin who does that and swears by it. *shiver*

A lot of folks do that here, too! Ugh, keep the oysters outta my dressing!
*reminds myself to keep some Stove Top in the cabinet just in case*

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

Originally Posted by PinkieLee

A lot of folks do that here, too! Ugh, keep the oysters outta my dressing!
*reminds myself to keep some Stove Top in the cabinet just in case*

My daughter's ex-husband's family always had oyster stuffing each year, they swore by it. (me, I would just swear!) That, and oyster stew for Christmas Eve. Yuk.
So here I am, for the first time in 15 yrs, being able to cook for my family for Thanksgiving. I have to say I make some of the BEST dressing in the world. My daughter told me that SHE would be making her oyster stuffing again, I told her fine, as long as I made MY stuffing too! She also wants to almost arm wrestle for the right to make our family's traditional cheesy corn casserole. I think I will let her, knowing she wouldn't have known how to make it if it were not for ME teaching her so many years ago! LOL
Bottom line is, Thanksgiving will be at MY place this year!

[always2late]

This isn't about an "ick" dish...more like a minor disaster. My mom worked nights for years when I was growing up. We have a big extended family and we would all gather at one or the others' house for a holiday. My parents chose to have Thanksgiving at our house. Because my mom was exhausted come Thanksgiving morning, I usually did the cooking. This one year we were having about 20 people to dinner, so I got up early, put the turkey in the oven (it was HUGE), and spent the rest of the morning and early afternoon getting everything else ready. When the turkey was just about done, my dad decided he needed to "take a look at it". He opened the oven and pulled out the rack...but when he pushed the turkey back in, he pushed the PAN that the turkey was in, not the rack. The rack tipped, spilling grease into the back of the oven, resulting in a huge grease fire. I had to take the turkey next door to my aunt's house (thankfully she lived close), and put it in her oven, wait until our oven cooled off, and then clean out burned on turkey grease.

Fun Fun Fun....gotta love the holidays.

[Miss July]

Ok I gotta say................what's up that NASTY green been casserole sheeeit???
(I will admit I have never ventured to even try it)

[JAGG]

Originally Posted by Miss July

Ok I gotta say................what's up that NASTY green been casserole sheeeit???
(I will admit I have never ventured to even try it)

No kidding! I think that was taken out of a cook book called " 1001 ways to ruin a good veggie" it was on the same page as the yams with brown sugar, raisins and marshmallows .

[ruby_woo]

Originally Posted by Miss July

Ok I gotta say................what's up that NASTY green been casserole sheeeit???
(I will admit I have never ventured to even try it)

I actually really like green bean casserole! I love the crunchy onions on top.

[persiphone]

Originally Posted by Miss July

Ok I gotta say................what's up that NASTY green been casserole sheeeit???
(I will admit I have never ventured to even try it)

right?! nothing says tasty like green beans with a can of glop dumped on them topped with fried....onions from a can? why? who does this? just pee on the turkey while you're at it :P

[dixie]

I have one of those weird aunts who (despite being told EVERY year that she doesn't need to bring ANYTHING) always brings something....different. I think one year it was pretty much a plate that looked like it had grass on it. (No clue what that was.) Then one year she attempted to make her own tofu and hummus "turkey". (Once again, not quite sure if that's what it was supposed to be.) This is a lady who does not cook AT ALL throughout the year, but always seems to bring these weird things to every holiday get together. I remember a time when we used to all get a little of it and try it, to be nice. After years of folks gagging and throwing up, I think she is now used to the fact that her stuff stays in its container on a small table in a room by itself. Even she won't eat it, despite swearing it's "the best thing I've ever made!" lol

Despite the fact that my family is very southern and wants the very southern traditional holiday meal, I have no problem with the fact that she is attempting to bring us healthier things and expose us to newer things we may not have tried on our own elsewhere. It's the fact that she has no culinary skills whatsoever, and can't bring her own self to eat it either...lol

That being said...now we'll see if the same thing happens to me, since I am attempting a new cinnamon glazed pumpkin loaf recipe next week. Mine may be sitting right beside hers in that little room...LOL

[ReDo]

Ok I must admit the worst holiday dish I ever had was made by me. Yup I messed it up big time. LMAO

I was trying to please everyone who was coming for dinner and usually I only make a huge turkey that looks perfect and tastes better than it looks. However this one year people wanted a ham. WTF the pilgrims did not eat ham but okay fine I can handle a ham in this mix too.

I was so proud of myself got the perfect looking ham took the wrapper off put the pineapples on it and all that held in place by a tooth pick just like the cook book said.

Well the funny thing is nobody told me that a ham is double wrapped. I cooked it and it didn't smell as I thought it should. The timer went off as I was talking on the phone with my mom who could not make the trip to Florida. I pulled it out and tried to cut it. I asked my mom if ham skin is really that think I can't even cut this thing. She then asked if I took the inner wrapper off the ham.

OH MY GOSH her and I busted out laughing so hard. I slipped my knife under the edge of the plastic and sure enough I had cooked the ham in plastic.

I excused myself and ran to the grocery store and purchased an already cooked ham from the deli and passed it off as my own.

I never agreed to cook another ham after that.

So yes the worst dish in my memory is the ham that was baked in the wrapper

[Rockinonahigh]

Originally Posted by ruby_woo

I honestly thought this thread was going to be about the number of dishes you need to wash after the holidays are over.

One year, a family friend of ours joined us for Thanksgiving dinner, and insisted on bring the stuffing, which is my favorite Thanksgiving dish...and she added oysters. To the stuffing. I wanted to die.

I know it sound yucky,bu really if its made right its pretty good,BUT I really prefer stuffing to be made the old fashion normal way.

Once may years ago when I hadnt got my head together I was married to the french guy from the back woods of little river Louisiana..when I say his folks live way out im not kidding( he was in big oil,lots of moola 3 gollege degrees in anything to do with oil)....anyways they had this family friend who was reputated to be one hell of a cook.Well gess what,if u think oysters in dressing is bad...she ,made her dressing with blood sasuage..big yuck...aint no way never gonna be hungry enough in this life or the next to let this pass my lips and call it food.

[chai~]

OMFREAKIN'GAWD!!!!!!!!

Originally Posted by JAGG

Oh I have a good story. My dad always cooked the big Sunday and holiday meals. He was a great chef BTW. I was about 8yrs old or so, and was tasked with helping him. As instructed, I opened the can of cranberry sauce and put it on a plate. But there was some thing embedded in the sauce. So my dad pulled it out and it was a 1 inch long top part of a man's thumb . Minus the nail. My dad told me to toss it all in the trash and don't breath a word of it to anyone, because it would upset my grandmother too much.

[Medusa]

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

I read your description.

Ebon said, "That sounds good."

The fucker didn't want to try my friend's spiced pumpkin bread (and which I wound up giving him half of cuz he loved it like I knew he would) but he thinks that's good.

With cherries.

Deer. Cherries.

Two things that should NEVER come together in one dish.

: pukeface :

[sara-bera]

Originally Posted by Medusa

OMG.

We had as Thanksgiving potluck today at work.

My girls (there are a total of 5 of us) and I went to the room early so that we could scope out who brought what because there are some people who's food we will not touch.

Well, all 5 of us had a very strong reaction when someone who has often raved loudly about her own cooking brought in a curious looking dish.

It was a gloppy crust-covered thing that red jellied stuff had boiled up out of and we could see differently colored chunks inside of it.

What was it, you ask? It was "sweet and sour deer pot pie".

SWEET. AND. SOUR. DEER. POT. PIE.

It had grayish chunks of deer meat floating in potatoes, marachino cherries, barbeque sauce, celery, apples, and some other horrid looking shit under a dome of flattened biscuits.

The smell of it was like the trash can at the fair when it's 100 degrees outside.

Who the FUCK would eat that?

Your HR department is providing you all with therapy after that, yes?

[Lynn]

My mother makes the best jello concoction--red jello, chock full of whole cranberries, pineapple, apples, and walnuts. It's amazing. I've tried to make it a few times, but it won't set up. I don't think she's giving me the full recipe.

My sister-in-law is doing Thanksgiving this year. It's a big undertaking, and I'm appreciative of her efforts. I wish she didn't steam everything, including the turkey. A little spice and salt would go a long way, too. I never thought I'd prefer my mother's overdone bird to a fairly moist one with no flavor.

We live far away from everyone, or we could invite them to the best Thanksgiving meal, ever. It would, however, include the notorious green bean casserole!

[ruffryder]

Ewwww!! some scary stuff. LOL

I don't have any nasty food stories, thank God!! It's all been homemade deliciousness and I've been thankful.