Long Distance Relationships

[meridiantoo]

Originally Posted by thedivahrrrself

I can completely relate to the first statement, and I would concur that the hardest part is not being able to be touched for such long periods of time. In a situation where I am upset, for example, it would be easy to reassure me with a simple touch - a hand on the knee or an arm around the shoulder. It's much harder when all you have is a phone line. It is hard to feel connected sometimes, and it's so much easier to misunderstand each other.

There is also more pressure to have good times when you are together. I got sick the last time I flew down, and I felt so guilty because I felt like it was impeding on Our Time, and we get so little time together (though, thankfully, I can take my work with me so I did get to stay for a while).

I would say, for me, the biggest challenge is overcoming uncertainty. I suppose once you've had years together, that goes away, but in those times when you're just not connecting, it's so easy to be insecure, to wonder if the other person is pulling away or losing interest.

International relationships carry their own unique burdens (how I would love to just throw a random card or present in the mail sometimes!), and it's harder to do the little gestures that make someone feel special. But on the flip side, I suppose the fact that someone is willing to fly 5000 miles just to see you should make you feel pretty good about yourself

Is it worth it? I suppose that depends on the person. But for me, finding someone who intrigues me, challenges me, and excites me, who can also be tender - well, that's worth crossing the globe for.

I cannot even fathom international...that would be so difficult on many levels. I find across the country hard enough. That's a great point you make - if someone is willing to fly that far (not to mention the airfare involved), then you they must really want to see you.

I think it is worth it for the right person. But, it's not easy, that's for sure. You have to put forth effort to make the connection stay and the trust to blossom.

You've mentioned several things that made me think. Thank you for that insight!