New sex partner=new toys? Your opinion

[imperfect_cupcake]

Originally Posted by Cid

I haven't been with a lot of different partners so maybe that's why I think differently, but I did have a problem with one partner that I had. She hated hearing about my ex in any way, shape or form. I couldn't talk about places that I had been to, concerts that I enjoyed or things that I did in the past if they included my ex.
However, it was ok for her to keep the part of her that involved her ex and their sex life. I didn't get how that was ok. To me, it wasn't.

Here's what I'd like to know. If a femme had her own cock (seriously, I hate that word, but it seems to be the most popular) would her butch partner wear it knowing someone else had worn it before?

I'm guessing not. And the butch that wore it before didn't even have it inserted into their body.

Well I'm not a butch and I do have dicks that other people wear. they can wear their own, or they can wear mine (I'm a size queen. I love them very fat and lots of butches bring the medium sized one one the first date/day of play - also many of my partners haven't used a strap on before, so my harness and dicks are the ones they first use).

I've had two of the ones in my collection of a modest five for almost 10 years. they are in very good condition, I take very good care of them and they are high quality and very expensive. I have slept with about 15 or so butches/MoC women in the last 10 years. None, not one of those, objected to using them, nor did they ask or think about who had used them before. I don't think that's what they were thinking about when passions were running high and the toys were brought out.

My wife used them and they had been worn by several people before and after her. She never asked or wondered who had used them in the whole time we were together.

When she brought her dick to the relationship, she had bought it in her last long term r'ship. No, I did not consider what she had done with M with the dick. I just don't care.

But I've had many partners and I also actually love hearing about their past r'ships. I actually truly do. Especially the positive stuff. Stories about travel and adventure and hilarious sex accidents I like a lot. exes do not threaten me. I know what it is like to have loved and lost and miss people but not want them back. I like sharing that human aspect of experience. I like hearing how much someone loved someone else because it shows they have the same capacity for me.

I may be a bitch, I may not be politically correct/sensative, I take the piss and tease people, mock in a friendly way, be a smartass/sarcastic for affection, I may speak very bluntly and not give a flying fuck about other people's feelings around what I have to say - how they feel is their issue - but I do love stories of love and adventure. especially if they inspire pathos and love or a great venting rant that makes me laugh.

I will not walk on eggshells when it comes to these things. If people are not comfortable with me talking about my exes then I have nothing to talk about. I have spent the majority of my life in the company of those I have loved and I like telling the stories and hearing them.

The sex toys (bondage gear, cocks, harness, flogger, crop, pinwheel, vibrators, rubber opera gloves, portable sling) would cost a small fortune to replace and since I sleep around when I'm single with friends that I like, it's not appropriate for butches to get diva-rific about this. they use mine or bring their own. I don't care who they've used it on. I hope it was fun.

I'm here now and I have a hard time believing they'd be thinking about anything else but my snatch when it's in front of them, to be perfectly honest.