Making Peace with Exes

[Lynn]

The most significant relationship I had, barring my present one, was my marriage to my former husband. We were together for 23 years, and now continue to co-parent our children. I'd hoped we would be friends. We said we would, for all the reasons mentioned above. But, it turns out that the resentments are too deep and neither one of us seems to find any compelling reasons to nurture a true friendship. We are cordial as we can muster for the sake of our kids, and our own sanity, but we aren't friends. I may have loved him for all those years, but I find that I don't like him very much and realize that I don't have much respect for him. Sometimes this disappoints me deeply.

I'm friends with some exes, not so much with others. Having a personal value to remain friends with an ex is not something I aspire to. If I can develop a true friendship, then that's great. But, if not, then it wasn't meant to be. Sometimes whatever brought us together in the first place isn't enough to sustain a friendship when things go sour.