About Butches Q & A

[TruTexan]

Originally Posted by Femminator

I forwarded this site to my Butch as she is currently on a journey to decide if she is more feminine or masculine of center. She needs to have support of other Butches to help her I think. So, my question follows:

Is it common for Butch to be a life long journey along the spectrum? By this I mean, is it common for you to question yourself if you are Butch enough, how you present, how you act, how Femmes see you? I have been with mine for over a decade now and it has been only lately that she is questioning herself excessively. I don't care HOW she presents personally, I love her. Is it harder for older Butches? We are in our 40's.

I don't think I ever actually had that life long journey along the spectrum of finding myself and what kind of butch I am. I am just me and I happen to accept and be ok with my being female, a woman, and masculine all at the same time. For me, the questions of being butch enough were usually coming from someone else questioning MY butchness, and with that I mean, probably only about 2 or 3 other male Identified butches questioned it. It was a posturing thing that I quickly diffused. I wonder if it is only lately that she is feeling some sorta age thing within herself that makes her excessively question herself? Like a midlife thing? Kinda sounds like it to me maybe.
As far as harder for older butches to date? I think that the older we get that there are less avenues to find women to date since we no longer go to the same hangouts like the bars as we might have when we were much younger, therefore leaving a tiny dating pool of friends making suggestions or finding meetup groups to create a larger pool of options when we are older single butches. Me, I just find it hard to meet people since I don't know anyone at all around where I live and there are no gay people here. Even when I lived in Austin, I found it hard to find groups that were older unless someone created a meetup.com group for lesbians in my area that got together to make friends and then I find that there's the clique thing still going on. I hate that crap. Anywho, I'd be interested in speaking to your gf about what she's going through and why she's questioning herself so much and to tell her my own stories I have and my own issues , that sorta thing, so she knows she probably not alone in how or what she is going through. Tell her to contact me when she decides to come onto the planet, to hit me up with a message so I know it's her. We can always use another butch around here ya know. LOL I hope she signs on and visits often.