What Cracked You Up Today?

Chad · 04-08-2017, 04:20 PM

I was grocery shopping when a lady walked by me and said "freak" so I looked up at her and she said it again "Greek" she then picked up the Greek yogurt. Haha! That cracked me up.

Wrang1er · 04-09-2017, 07:37 AM

Last night my sisters, nephew and I went out to the local watering hole. It's a small town place where I stick out like a sore thumb. However, it's laid back and I always have fun there. A band called Big Easy and the Gators were playing and they were giving out beads with a gator on them and I got some. Later in the evening I walk into the restroom and there's a woman who looks at me and says, "Oh you have beads." Then she proceeds to say that she has never had a lesbian experience and lifts her shirt and shows her breasts. It's a rare occasion when I don't know what to say but this was one. I just handed her my beads and went into a stall. I could hear her telling her friend she just had her first "lesbian experience". I wanted to clarify that flashing your breasts to a butch in the bathroom does not qualify as a "lesbian experience" but she was too drunk and plus I think it made her night.

This didn't necessarily crack me up but it did crack up my sisters. I couldn't find a WTF thread!

Gemme · 04-09-2017, 07:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wrang1er

Last night my sisters, nephew and I went out to the local watering hole. It's a small town place where I stick out like a sore thumb. However, it's laid back and I always have fun there. A band called Big Easy and the Gators were playing and they were giving out beads with a gator on them and I got some. Later in the evening I walk into the restroom and there's a woman who looks at me and says, "Oh you have beads." Then she proceeds to say that she has never had a lesbian experience and lifts her shirt and shows her breasts. It's a rare occasion when I don't know what to say but this was one. I just handed her by beads and went into a stall. I could hear her telling her friend she just had her first "lesbian experience". I wanted to clarify that flashing your breasts to a butch in the bathroom does not qualify as a "lesbian experience" but she was too drunk and plus I think it made her night.

This didn't necessarily crack me up but it did crack up my sisters. I couldn't find a WTF thread!

The zombie thread would qualify for that. Look for the thread with the face in the title. Also, remember to include a zombie face in your post if you do pop in.

That's an awesome story. You made her night, I bet.

Wrang1er · 04-09-2017, 07:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

The zombie thread would qualify for that. Look for the thread with the face in the title. Also, remember to include a zombie face in your post if you do pop in.

That's an awesome story. You made her night, I bet.

It was definitely a

experience! I am not very good at finding specific threads and stumbled onto this one.

Gemme · 04-09-2017, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wrang1er

It was definitely a

experience! I am not very good at finding specific threads and stumbled onto this one.

I'll bump it for you in a few, okay?

Wrang1er · 04-09-2017, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

I'll bump it for you in a few, okay?

You are too kind!

A. Spectre · 04-11-2017, 08:08 AM

The greatest restaurant review of all time, as well as cheeky and hell funny!

Le Cinq, Paris: restaurant review

It was supposed to be a joyous trip to one of France’s famous gastro palaces – what could possibly go wrong?

The dining room, deep in the hotel, is a broad space of high ceilings and coving, with thick carpets to muffle the screams. It is decorated in various shades of taupe, biscuit and fuck you. There’s a little gilt here and there, to remind us that this is a room designed for people for whom guilt is unfamiliar. It shouts money much as football fans shout at the ref. There’s a stool for the lady’s handbag. Well, of course there is.

Other things are the stuff of therapy. The canapé we are instructed to eat first is a transparent ball on a spoon. It looks like a Barbie-sized silicone breast implant, and is a “spherification”, a gel globe using a technique perfected by Ferran Adrià at El Bulli about 20 years ago. This one pops in our mouth to release stale air with a tinge of ginger. My companion winces. “It’s like eating a condom that’s been left lying about in a dusty greengrocer’s,” she says.

We hit it again in an amuse-bouche which doesn’t: a halved and refilled passionfruit, the vicious passionfruit supplemented by a watercress purée that tastes only of the plant’s most bitter tones. My lips purse, like a cat’s arse that’s brushed against nettles.

The cheapest of the starters is gratinated onions “in the Parisian style”. We’re told it has the flavour of French onion soup. It makes us yearn for a bowl of French onion soup. It is mostly black, like nightmares, and sticky, like the floor at a teenager’s party.

04-08-2017, 04:20 PM	#1
Chad Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: OFOS Stone butch Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Loved Caregiver Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Texas Posts: 6,164 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,746 Thanked 20,312 Times in 5,677 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Cracked me up I was grocery shopping when a lady walked by me and said "freak" so I looked up at her and she said it again "Greek" she then picked up the Greek yogurt. Haha! That cracked me up.

04-11-2017, 08:08 AM	#7
A. Spectre Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch dominant lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: She, Baby Boi Relationship Status: She is my sunrise and sunset. Join Date: Nov 2014 Location: North Shore Chicago Posts: 1,569 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,033 Thanked 11,079 Times in 1,496 Posts Rep Power: 21474848	The greatest restaurant review of all time, as well as cheeky and hell funny! Le Cinq, Paris: restaurant review It was supposed to be a joyous trip to one of France’s famous gastro palaces – what could possibly go wrong? The dining room, deep in the hotel, is a broad space of high ceilings and coving, with thick carpets to muffle the screams. It is decorated in various shades of taupe, biscuit and fuck you. There’s a little gilt here and there, to remind us that this is a room designed for people for whom guilt is unfamiliar. It shouts money much as football fans shout at the ref. There’s a stool for the lady’s handbag. Well, of course there is. Other things are the stuff of therapy. The canapé we are instructed to eat first is a transparent ball on a spoon. It looks like a Barbie-sized silicone breast implant, and is a “spherification”, a gel globe using a technique perfected by Ferran Adrià at El Bulli about 20 years ago. This one pops in our mouth to release stale air with a tinge of ginger. My companion winces. “It’s like eating a condom that’s been left lying about in a dusty greengrocer’s,” she says. We hit it again in an amuse-bouche which doesn’t: a halved and refilled passionfruit, the vicious passionfruit supplemented by a watercress purée that tastes only of the plant’s most bitter tones. My lips purse, like a cat’s arse that’s brushed against nettles. The cheapest of the starters is gratinated onions “in the Parisian style”. We’re told it has the flavour of French onion soup. It makes us yearn for a bowl of French onion soup. It is mostly black, like nightmares, and sticky, like the floor at a teenager’s party. __________________ * * *Joy and Sorrow are Inseparable

04-09-2017, 07:37 AM	#2
Wrang1er Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Me, myself and I Join Date: Sep 2011 Location: Here Posts: 1,526 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,112 Thanked 7,043 Times in 1,354 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Last night my sisters, nephew and I went out to the local watering hole. It's a small town place where I stick out like a sore thumb. However, it's laid back and I always have fun there. A band called Big Easy and the Gators were playing and they were giving out beads with a gator on them and I got some. Later in the evening I walk into the restroom and there's a woman who looks at me and says, "Oh you have beads." Then she proceeds to say that she has never had a lesbian experience and lifts her shirt and shows her breasts. It's a rare occasion when I don't know what to say but this was one. I just handed her my beads and went into a stall. I could hear her telling her friend she just had her first "lesbian experience". I wanted to clarify that flashing your breasts to a butch in the bathroom does not qualify as a "lesbian experience" but she was too drunk and plus I think it made her night. This didn't necessarily crack me up but it did crack up my sisters. I couldn't find a WTF thread!