Caregivers and Stress

[Chad]

Seems like I live in this thread now. I am struggling. I work and travel for business a lot. And when I come home there is more work.

I used to be happy. I dated and had fun. Now life is work every day. No fun and no dating.

I can honestly say that I am very unhappy these days.

I owe this to mom she saved me by adopting me but this is a hard debt to pay.

[Kelt]

So I put the happy stuff in the zombie thread. Here is the other side of the coin.

I am very worried about my mother. She is in Washington state. She is 88 and frail. On the up side, she is in the eastern half of the state well away from the virus outbreak area, the place where she lives is a private home with only 5 residents and there are 5 caregivers too, though they staff 24/7 with those 5 and backup is pretty much non-existent. On the lesser side of things it is a fairly rural town of 90k that had two decent hospitals until two years ago when the big hospital chain in Seattle bought the good one and gutted the staff. I also just found out the not-so-good regional hospital closed last month, so scarcer that usual resources. Mom is in goodish health with no diseases but she has dementia and can't remember things like no face touching. Did I mention that she is 88 and frail?

There is also all the worry/planning around what to do if she needs me there? I'm 1200 miles away, two international and one regional airports away, plus hotel etc to do what? Bring germs? Make things worse?

The state hospital association has told families not to visit any nursing homes anyway. While this is a private residence, it is also a licensed medical facility and they have to comply with all guidelines.

All I can do right now is to continue to worry myself sick and call her every morning to pretend there is nothing going on in the world and talk about the weather and what was for breakfast... Which she can't remember anyway.

[Jar]

Originally Posted by Chad

Seems like I live in this thread now. I am struggling. I work and travel for business a lot. And when I come home there is more work.

I used to be happy. I dated and had fun. Now life is work every day. No fun and no dating.

I can honestly say that I am very unhappy these days.

I owe this to mom she saved me by adopting me but this is a hard debt to pay.

I totally understand my friend. I haven't posted here for a while because I've been moving between hospitals and rehabs with my mom. I feel the same as you do .... I owe my mom for a lifetime of support and love but it IS a big debt to pay.