Negotiating Silence

christie · 12-09-2009, 10:42 AM

Great thread idea!

For me, I chose to be silent quite a bit of the time because I see a lot of "interpretation" of others' words. A great deal of reading between the lines and putting a personal spin on them; rather than taking the words at face value.

I'm a say what I mean and mean what I say kinda woman. My words have often been interpreted incorrectly, and in as such, their meaning/intent completely disregarded.

I also think that when we try to be more concrete in our words, citing personal experiences/situations, those words are often used as "ammunition" against us. I have seen people post real issues... making themselves very vulnerable... and instead of the responders being supportive and uplifting, the OP has been raked over the proverbial coals and judged.

What can we do to change the issues I see? Its pretty simple to me... stop interpreting and be more open minded that not all our journeys are alike. Learn to agree to disagree, respectfully. Say what you mean. Mean what you say. Stop reading more into things than what is stated. Try to put ourselves in another's shoes and that whole "Do unto others."

Just my nickel's worth... That and $6 will get you a latte.

Christie

12-09-2009, 10:42 AM	#29
christie Member How Do You Identify?: A Force with which to be reckoned Preferred Pronoun?: just be nice... Relationship Status: I call her Mine Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Transplanted to the PNW Posts: 1,246 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,552 Thanked 2,476 Times in 706 Posts Rep Power: 14753263	Great thread idea! For me, I chose to be silent quite a bit of the time because I see a lot of "interpretation" of others' words. A great deal of reading between the lines and putting a personal spin on them; rather than taking the words at face value. I'm a say what I mean and mean what I say kinda woman. My words have often been interpreted incorrectly, and in as such, their meaning/intent completely disregarded. I also think that when we try to be more concrete in our words, citing personal experiences/situations, those words are often used as "ammunition" against us. I have seen people post real issues... making themselves very vulnerable... and instead of the responders being supportive and uplifting, the OP has been raked over the proverbial coals and judged. What can we do to change the issues I see? Its pretty simple to me... stop interpreting and be more open minded that not all our journeys are alike. Learn to agree to disagree, respectfully. Say what you mean. Mean what you say. Stop reading more into things than what is stated. Try to put ourselves in another's shoes and that whole "Do unto others." Just my nickel's worth... That and $6 will get you a latte. Christie