Dating and Race

[Gemme]

Originally Posted by Dragonfly

...everybody else feels a person out for more than a week before dating right? Do people date the same as back when I used to get asked on a date?

I know it's been a while, but yes, often people wait quite a while before asking others out on dates. Everyone hopes for a positive reaction when asking someone out, so it makes sense to get to know the other person as much as possible before making yourself vulnerable. The process is about the same, though the actual activities may be different.

It's been a while since you posted, so I hope that you are enjoying your time with your friend.

To get back to what you said you wanted the thread to turn into....a discussion about interracial relationships and the difficulties in dating, etc...

I find that it's much easier now than in the past. I've dated Puerto Ricans, Cubans, whites, and African Americans, so I definitely don't have a set race that I prefer to partner and date. I prefer people that are kind and that I feel a connection with. It just so happens that I've been blessed enough to experience that with many different folks.

I kind of expected some of the usual racial stuff here in Texas, but I haven't seen it. It may have happened behind my back or out of my earshot, but nothing's happened that I am aware of. The interesting thing is that we have more issues with our families. Chances are, I'll never introduce Organic to my dad or stepmom. Chances are, Organic will never introduce me to his mom. They all have old school prejudice buried deep inside them and it's truly sad because we're kickass people who are loved by people they love. It shouldn't matter.

But it does.

So, in conclusion, we have more racial issues with our families than with our friends and/or with strangers.

[Dragonfly]

Originally Posted by Gemme

I know it's been a while, but yes, often people wait quite a while before asking others out on dates. Everyone hopes for a positive reaction when asking someone out, so it makes sense to get to know the other person as much as possible before making yourself vulnerable. The process is about the same, though the actual activities may be different.

It's been a while since you posted, so I hope that you are enjoying your time with your friend.

To get back to what you said you wanted the thread to turn into....a discussion about interracial relationships and the difficulties in dating, etc...

I find that it's much easier now than in the past. I've dated Puerto Ricans, Cubans, whites, and African Americans, so I definitely don't have a set race that I prefer to partner and date. I prefer people that are kind and that I feel a connection with. It just so happens that I've been blessed enough to experience that with many different folks.

I kind of expected some of the usual racial stuff here in Texas, but I haven't seen it. It may have happened behind my back or out of my earshot, but nothing's happened that I am aware of. The interesting thing is that we have more issues with our families. Chances are, I'll never introduce Organic to my dad or stepmom. Chances are, Organic will never introduce me to his mom. They all have old school prejudice buried deep inside them and it's truly sad because we're kickass people who are loved by people they love. It shouldn't matter.

But it does.

So, in conclusion, we have more racial issues with our families than with our friends and/or with strangers.

Yes I have been enjoying our time very much. But no I haven't agreed to a date yet like you say my speed is to get to know someone dating is saying you want more than friends. As for the race issue, I considered asking her but before I had a chance I learned the race of some of her past partners and a few things came up while we were hanging out at a club that showed me we are on the same page in spite of our area and some of our peers. If I could go back to the convo we had about what's your "type" I would have just asked then what she experienced in our area. I just felt rude or worried its not the same as gender and sexuality and offend her. Thanks for adding your viewpoint! The more the better regardless of where I am in the relationship others may wonder how they should approach the topic with a stranger.

Ps we like each other A LOT but aren't in a rush to get " romantic" dating too fast and have amazing convo!