I'd Like to Claim I was Drunk: Pick Up Lines Destined to Fail - Page 4

chefhottie25 · 08-24-2010, 11:02 PM

"so do you wanna f**k?"
i apologize i was a jerk in my 20's
but that line actually hooked me a hottie who i ended having a 4 year relationship with. then she left me for my best friend kevin. i miss him more than i miss her.

proximitywithoutintimacy · 02-05-2011, 06:55 PM

I was catering an event last night (the hunting expo thingy), and apparently one of the guys there hit on one of my co-workers... he said to her,

"You're a very beautiful girl... you look like my EX-wife. I'm at table 23

"

Miss Scarlett · 02-05-2011, 07:26 PM

This wasn't a pick up line, rather it was said to me very early on during a first date many years ago "Your bed or mine? She looked really confused when I excused myself and left!

rlin · 02-06-2011, 12:37 AM

theres always the ol' redneck standby...

"get in the truck, bitch..."

miss entycing · 02-06-2011, 01:04 AM

said to me one year at an after-pride party, courtesy of a very drunk butch:

"hey girly-you're a sexy mutha-fucker- come sit on my face!"
to which i replied:
"why? is your nose bigger than your dick?"

I was not amused.

really??
lordhavemercy.

Diva · 02-06-2011, 01:53 AM

You're really cool, but how hot is your mother?

little_ms_sunshyne · 02-06-2011, 03:23 AM

Man leans in and whispers "For you, I would pay..."

My Response: *Blank Stare* "No entiendo...No Hablo Ingles"

Mister Bent · 02-11-2011, 11:26 AM

Baby, you got a Mubarek on you...

[an ass that just won't quit.]

uglyboi · 05-19-2011, 08:21 PM

Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

Selenay · 01-25-2012, 11:39 AM

Hey baby, I left my scarf at home; can I wrap your legs around me instead?

kannon · 01-25-2012, 11:45 AM

Motion for her to come over with the finger "come here" sign. If she does, tell her, "I just wanted to see if I could I could make you come with my finger. Looks like I can. My fingers work even better in the bed."

WARNING: This drunken line is sure to evoke a strong emotional reaction of some sort.

WomenMoveMe · 01-25-2012, 12:17 PM

I took my forefinger...put it to my lips...and softly licked it. Then put the wet finger to her shirt. Looked right into her eyes and said "we really should get you out of these wet things".

or...

"You need me".

starryeyes · 01-25-2012, 01:12 PM

If I even attempted to say a pick-up line, which probably would never happen... I would probably get a red face, start giggling and just walk away like an idiot. Sexy huh?

:-D

tapu · 01-25-2012, 01:12 PM

"You are so in my mating pool."

tapu · 01-25-2012, 01:14 PM

This one usually works really, really well (go figure); but oh boy, when it goes bad...

"Ya wanna' date me? I'll let ya."

Ciaran · 01-25-2012, 02:28 PM

This one can work (if the recipient understands irony which is a big if)

"You're not great looking, but there's not much to choose from here."

Also, potential to work with someone who hasn't had a humour bypass:

"If I offer you the chance to come home with me tonight, is it okay if you made up the bed again in the morning?"

tapu · 01-25-2012, 02:49 PM

Where I'm from, it's customary to exchange watches with someone you've just met....

(It was Southern California--everyone had a Rolex except me. Actually, did I even have a watch?)

-- tapu, Accomplished PUA

tapu · 01-25-2012, 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by starryeyes

If I even attempted to say a pick-up line, which probably would never happen... I would probably get a red face, start giggling and just walk away like an idiot. Sexy huh?

:-D

That would work on me.

CherylNYC · 01-25-2012, 04:42 PM

The weird straight dude said, "I would looove to study the Upanishads with you."

genghisfawn · 01-25-2012, 06:04 PM

I was at a pub with friends and this kid (I swear it was a kid... like, 19, which is the minimum drinking age here...) was trying to chat us up. Naturally we were polite but turned our backs when we were done being civil, but he just kept harping on at me (I was closest.)

Me: *turning around and saying politely* Can I help you with something?
Him: I just wanna know... are we friends?
Me: Maybe someday, but I'd like to visit with my friends now, please, okay?
Him: Maybe not. I hate being in the friend zone, so maybe we should go back to my place and get this over with.

Fortunately everyone heard him because he was drunk and yelling, so we ended up laughing and booing him out (along with a bunch of men our age who started hollering "Peeweeeee!" at him. I love straight bars.

02-06-2011, 01:04 AM	#65
miss entycing Senior Member How Do You Identify?: dangerous, but worth the risk. Preferred Pronoun?: just be nice.. it's that easy. Relationship Status: CapitalM's carved upon my skin. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: on the southern edge of sanity, under a carolina moon. Posts: 3,276 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 8,341 Thanked 8,262 Times in 2,254 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	destined to fail... um, yeah. said to me one year at an after-pride party, courtesy of a very drunk butch: "hey girly-you're a sexy mutha-fucker- come sit on my face!" to which i replied: "why? is your nose bigger than your dick?" I was not amused. really?? lordhavemercy. __________________ True strength lies in submission which permits one to dedicate their life, through devotion, to something beyond themselves. Whenever someone awakens fully, it affects human consciousness at a collective level. It is like dropping a stone into a dark murky pond. Ripples of light... Not one word need be spoken.

02-11-2011, 11:26 AM	#68
Mister Bent Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: . Posts: 2,905 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,151 Thanked 5,825 Times in 1,722 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	current events relevant mackin' Baby, you got a Mubarek on you... [an ass that just won't quit.] __________________ Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats. - H. L. Mencken Last edited by Mister Bent; 02-11-2011 at 11:30 AM. Reason: some twat pointed out I misspelled "quit."

05-19-2011, 08:21 PM	#69
uglyboi Member How Do You Identify?: As the 'The Bourne Identity' Preferred Pronoun?: Cheerful pessimist Relationship Status: Married Join Date: May 2011 Location: In a house we bought Posts: 411 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 294 Thanked 1,208 Times in 327 Posts Rep Power: 18936851	Works everytime Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

01-25-2012, 11:39 AM	#70
Selenay Member How Do You Identify?: A soul for a compass and a heart for a pair of wings. Preferred Pronoun?: All I ask of living is to have no chains on me. Relationship Status: All I own are the strides I spend to the finish line. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Somewhere in between here and gone. Posts: 662 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 110 Thanked 1,447 Times in 369 Posts Rep Power: 6344715	Hey baby, I left my scarf at home; can I wrap your legs around me instead? __________________ Two or three things I know for sure, And one is that I would rather go naked Than wear the coat the world has made for me.

01-25-2012, 11:45 AM	#71
kannon Member How Do You Identify?: bloke Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Happy is the heart that believes in angels Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: Land of Milk and Honey Posts: 884 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,920 Thanked 2,067 Times in 584 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	Motion for her to come over with the finger "come here" sign. If she does, tell her, "I just wanted to see if I could I could make you come with my finger. Looks like I can. My fingers work even better in the bed." WARNING: This drunken line is sure to evoke a strong emotional reaction of some sort. __________________ Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.

08-24-2010, 11:02 PM	#61
chefhottie25 Member How Do You Identify?: boi Preferred Pronoun?: hy Relationship Status: happily taken Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: ohio Posts: 1,406 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 26 Thanked 889 Times in 478 Posts Rep Power: 1175217	"so do you wanna f**k?" i apologize i was a jerk in my 20's but that line actually hooked me a hottie who i ended having a 4 year relationship with. then she left me for my best friend kevin. i miss him more than i miss her.

02-05-2011, 06:55 PM	#62
proximitywithoutintimacy Member How Do You Identify?: Rocker Lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: That One Girl ;) Relationship Status: Putting My Heart Back Together Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: USA Posts: 175 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 141 Thanked 290 Times in 106 Posts Rep Power: 670282	I was catering an event last night (the hunting expo thingy), and apparently one of the guys there hit on one of my co-workers... he said to her, "You're a very beautiful girl... you look like my EX-wife. I'm at table 23 "

02-05-2011, 07:26 PM	#63
Miss Scarlett Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Relationship Status: . Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: . Posts: 5,530 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,478 Thanked 12,947 Times in 3,419 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	This wasn't a pick up line, rather it was said to me very early on during a first date many years ago "Your bed or mine? She looked really confused when I excused myself and left!

02-06-2011, 12:37 AM	#64
rlin Member How Do You Identify?: human Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: nomad Posts: 712 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,450 Thanked 1,189 Times in 451 Posts Rep Power: 1004849	theres always the ol' redneck standby... "get in the truck, bitch..."

02-06-2011, 01:53 AM	#66
Diva Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Diva Preferred Pronoun?: Diva Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Chez Diva Posts: 11,879 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,263 Thanked 17,174 Times in 5,239 Posts Rep Power: 0	*You're really cool, but how hot is your mother?*

02-06-2011, 03:23 AM	#67
little_ms_sunshyne Senior Member How Do You Identify?: . Join Date: Oct 2010 Location: . Posts: 3,312 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,339 Thanked 12,241 Times in 2,541 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Man leans in and whispers "For you, I would pay..." My Response: Blank Stare "No entiendo...No Hablo Ingles"

01-25-2012, 12:17 PM	#72
WomenMoveMe Member How Do You Identify?: I just wander about and be! Relationship Status: Caution: Dead End Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Kentucky Posts: 561 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,473 Thanked 2,100 Times in 417 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	Pick-ups I took my forefinger...put it to my lips...and softly licked it. Then put the wet finger to her shirt. Looked right into her eyes and said "we really should get you out of these wet things". or... "You need me".

01-25-2012, 01:12 PM	#73
starryeyes Senior Member How Do You Identify?: a round peg in a square hole Preferred Pronoun?: Guess... Relationship Status: Seat taken Join Date: May 2011 Location: Rocky Mountain High Posts: 2,491 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,199 Thanked 10,052 Times in 2,076 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	If I even attempted to say a pick-up line, which probably would never happen... I would probably get a red face, start giggling and just walk away like an idiot. Sexy huh? :-D __________________ "It's ok to make mistakes. It's ok to fall down. Get up! Look sickening....and make them eat it!" - Latrice Royale Starry

01-25-2012, 01:12 PM	#74
tapu Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Understated butch. Preferred Pronoun?: I Relationship Status: Party of One Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Maine Posts: 1,654 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,324 Thanked 3,114 Times in 1,103 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	"You are so in my mating pool." __________________ Really? That's not funny to you? Last edited by tapu; 01-25-2012 at 01:15 PM.

01-25-2012, 01:14 PM	#75
tapu Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Understated butch. Preferred Pronoun?: I Relationship Status: Party of One Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Maine Posts: 1,654 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,324 Thanked 3,114 Times in 1,103 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	This one usually works really, really well (go figure); but oh boy, when it goes bad... "Ya wanna' date me? I'll let ya." __________________ Really? That's not funny to you?

01-25-2012, 02:28 PM	#76
Ciaran Member How Do You Identify?: Altocalciphilic Preferred Pronoun?: Papa Smurf Relationship Status: Curmudgeonous spinster Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: London (but from Belfast) Posts: 678 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 471 Thanked 3,654 Times in 602 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	This one can work (if the recipient understands irony which is a big if) "You're not great looking, but there's not much to choose from here." Also, potential to work with someone who hasn't had a humour bypass: "If I offer you the chance to come home with me tonight, is it okay if you made up the bed again in the morning?"

01-25-2012, 02:49 PM	#77
tapu Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Understated butch. Preferred Pronoun?: I Relationship Status: Party of One Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Maine Posts: 1,654 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,324 Thanked 3,114 Times in 1,103 Posts Rep Power: 21474852	Where I'm from, it's customary to exchange watches with someone you've just met.... (It was Southern California--everyone had a Rolex except me. Actually, did I even have a watch?) -- tapu, Accomplished PUA __________________ Really? That's not funny to you?

01-25-2012, 04:42 PM	#79
CherylNYC Member How Do You Identify?: Stonefemme lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: I'm a woman. Behave accordingly. Relationship Status: Single, not looking. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: NYC Posts: 1,467 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,474 Thanked 7,116 Times in 1,205 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	The weird straight dude said, "I would looove to study the Upanishads with you." __________________ Cheryl

01-25-2012, 06:04 PM	#80
genghisfawn Member How Do You Identify?: Femme/Gentlewoman Preferred Pronoun?: She/her Relationship Status: Happily married 05/17/14 Join Date: Jan 2012 Location: Saskatchewan, Canada Posts: 561 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,056 Thanked 2,158 Times in 403 Posts Rep Power: 21474850	I was at a pub with friends and this kid (I swear it was a kid... like, 19, which is the minimum drinking age here...) was trying to chat us up. Naturally we were polite but turned our backs when we were done being civil, but he just kept harping on at me (I was closest.) Me: turning around and saying politely Can I help you with something? Him: I just wanna know... are we friends? Me: Maybe someday, but I'd like to visit with my friends now, please, okay? Him: Maybe not. I hate being in the friend zone, so maybe we should go back to my place and get this over with. Fortunately everyone heard him because he was drunk and yelling, so we ended up laughing and booing him out (along with a bunch of men our age who started hollering "Peeweeeee!" at him. I love straight bars.