Shit Heard Around this House!!

Gemme · 08-14-2011, 09:40 PM

Ebon and I were driving down the road and slowed at a red light. I stopped just behind a turn in for a Sonic and then I realized that it was the entrance opening and not the exit, so I scooted up some in case someone behind me wanted in.

No sooner did I do that, but some lady took the long way around the parking lot and came up to the entrance to exit, which was blocked by me at that point. I started mumbling about her just "having" to wait until I'd pulled up and yada yada yada about her going out the wrong way and just fussing in general.

Ebon rubs my shoulder and says, "Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault. How could you know that she'd do that? Don't worry about it. Let's talk about something else." in an incredibly annoying tone of voice.

Insert the creation, deliverance and receipt of "THE EYE" from me to him.

I say, "Do NOT dismiss me!"

Ebon says, as he pats my knee, "I'm not, honey. I'm just being patronizing."

Let's just say, the man is DAMN lucky the light changed at that moment.

DapperButch · 08-15-2011, 05:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

Ebon and I were driving down the road and slowed at a red light. I stopped just behind a turn in for a Sonic and then I realized that it was the entrance opening and not the exit, so I scooted up some in case someone behind me wanted in.

No sooner did I do that, but some lady took the long way around the parking lot and came up to the entrance to exit, which was blocked by me at that point. I started mumbling about her just "having" to wait until I'd pulled up and yada yada yada about her going out the wrong way and just fussing in general.

Ebon rubs my shoulder and says, "Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault. How could you know that she'd do that? Don't worry about it. Let's talk about something else." in an incredibly annoying tone of voice.

Insert the creation, deliverance and receipt of "THE EYE" from me to him.

I say, "Do NOT dismiss me!"

Ebon says, as he pats my knee, "I'm not, honey. I'm just being patronizing."

Let's just say, the man is DAMN lucky the light changed at that moment.

I love Ebon!

Scorp · 08-15-2011, 05:57 AM

LMFAO!!! Sorry Gemme, but that is just too damn funny because he sounds a bit like me...LOLOL

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

Ebon and I were driving down the road and slowed at a red light. I stopped just behind a turn in for a Sonic and then I realized that it was the entrance opening and not the exit, so I scooted up some in case someone behind me wanted in.

No sooner did I do that, but some lady took the long way around the parking lot and came up to the entrance to exit, which was blocked by me at that point. I started mumbling about her just "having" to wait until I'd pulled up and yada yada yada about her going out the wrong way and just fussing in general.

Ebon rubs my shoulder and says, "Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault. How could you know that she'd do that? Don't worry about it. Let's talk about something else." in an incredibly annoying tone of voice.

Insert the creation, deliverance and receipt of "THE EYE" from me to him.

I say, "Do NOT dismiss me!"

Ebon says, as he pats my knee, "I'm not, honey. I'm just being patronizing."

Let's just say, the man is DAMN lucky the light changed at that moment.

Gemme · 08-15-2011, 10:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch

I love Ebon!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scorp

LMFAO!!! Sorry Gemme, but that is just too damn funny because he sounds a bit like me...LOLOL

No apologies necessary. We torment one another regularly and both of us have a VERY sharp edge to our wit.

I'll get him back.

always2late · 08-22-2011, 05:40 PM

My friend and I discussing how fast our kids are growing up:

L: Oh my God, they are getting so big so fast. It makes me feel so old. Do you realize I'm almost 28?

Me: Are you crazy?? I WISH I was 28! You DO realize I'm 43 right?

L: Yeah, but you're like the Halle Berry 43 and I'm the Gary Coleman 28!!

*I laughed so hard I almost wet my pants...sigh another sign of getting older. LOL*

christie · 08-23-2011, 09:04 PM

So I have this canning/jam addiction. It requires many things from Wally World. We live 60 miles from anywhere other than Wally World, so in as much as I dislike their employment practices as well as it being a concerted effort to buy things NOT made in china, we do support our local economy quite a bit. Especially when I am canning.

If Jess is driving (which happens most times, I commute enough during the week, I usually don't drive any on the weekends), it takes her SO long to get situated and get the car started and out of the parking lot. Its usually 8000 degrees and all I want is the AC on and to escape the parking lot before another person decides to engage me in some inane conversation telling me their woes.

We have had many, many, many, MANY conversations (ok, me snipping at Jess, really) about how long it takes to take cigarettes out of pocket, find sunglasses, put on seatbelt, fumble for cigarettes, take one out of the pack, put the pack back in the console, fumble for a lighter that has usually fallen to the bottom of the console, check the seatbelt and FINALLY, bless the gods, put the key in the ignition and turn on the AC. All while I have been melting in the passenger seat, wishing I had gotten a couple of bottles of water to stave off the dehydration sure to ensue. Don't even get me started on how long it actually takes to back out of the parking space and drive the 500 feet to the highway. I should start packing a lunch.

Last weekend, we get the cart unloaded, hop in the car and I suppose I *might* have given Jess "the LOOK" and a, "HONEY!!!" as the pre-flight check began. Not missing a beat, she looks over at me and says, "I bet I can get you out of this parking lot in 30 minutes or less! Just like Domino's pizza, baby!"

I might have laughed till I cried and maybe wet myself a lil!

Jess · 08-23-2011, 09:09 PM

hrmph... I have YET to have an accident in a parking lot... safety first baby, I gots precious cargo on board!

Kenna · 08-23-2011, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by christie0918

So I have this canning/jam addiction. It requires many things from Wally World. We live 60 miles from anywhere other than Wally World, so in as much as I dislike their employment practices as well as it being a concerted effort to buy things NOT made in china, we do support our local economy quite a bit. Especially when I am canning.

If Jess is driving (which happens most times, I commute enough during the week, I usually don't drive any on the weekends), it takes her SO long to get situated and get the car started and out of the parking lot. Its usually 8000 degrees and all I want is the AC on and to escape the parking lot before another person decides to engage me in some inane conversation telling me their woes.

We have had many, many, many, MANY conversations (ok, me snipping at Jess, really) about how long it takes to take cigarettes out of pocket, find sunglasses, put on seatbelt, fumble for cigarettes, take one out of the pack, put the pack back in the console, fumble for a lighter that has usually fallen to the bottom of the console, check the seatbelt and FINALLY, bless the gods, put the key in the ignition and turn on the AC. All while I have been melting in the passenger seat, wishing I had gotten a couple of bottles of water to stave off the dehydration sure to ensue. Don't even get me started on how long it actually takes to back out of the parking space and drive the 500 feet to the highway. I should start packing a lunch.

Last weekend, we get the cart unloaded, hop in the car and I suppose I *might* have given Jess "the LOOK" and a, "HONEY!!!" as the pre-flight check began. Not missing a beat, she looks over at me and says, "I bet I can get you out of this parking lot in 30 minutes or less! Just like Domino's pizza, baby!"

I might have laughed till I cried and maybe wet myself a lil!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jess

hrmph... I have YET to have an accident in a parking lot... safety first baby, I gots precious cargo on board!

priceless!! safety first, indeed. At least you weren't like me, sitting in a parked car waiting on my son...when a woman in an SUV hit me, then proceeded to say "I was on the cell phone and didn't see you."

Did someone mention that it would take less time to walk home from Wally World?

Gemme · 08-24-2011, 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by christie0918

So I have this canning/jam addiction. It requires many things from Wally World. We live 60 miles from anywhere other than Wally World, so in as much as I dislike their employment practices as well as it being a concerted effort to buy things NOT made in china, we do support our local economy quite a bit. Especially when I am canning.

If Jess is driving (which happens most times, I commute enough during the week, I usually don't drive any on the weekends), it takes her SO long to get situated and get the car started and out of the parking lot. Its usually 8000 degrees and all I want is the AC on and to escape the parking lot before another person decides to engage me in some inane conversation telling me their woes.

We have had many, many, many, MANY conversations (ok, me snipping at Jess, really) about how long it takes to take cigarettes out of pocket, find sunglasses, put on seatbelt, fumble for cigarettes, take one out of the pack, put the pack back in the console, fumble for a lighter that has usually fallen to the bottom of the console, check the seatbelt and FINALLY, bless the gods, put the key in the ignition and turn on the AC. All while I have been melting in the passenger seat, wishing I had gotten a couple of bottles of water to stave off the dehydration sure to ensue. Don't even get me started on how long it actually takes to back out of the parking space and drive the 500 feet to the highway. I should start packing a lunch.

Last weekend, we get the cart unloaded, hop in the car and I suppose I *might* have given Jess "the LOOK" and a, "HONEY!!!" as the pre-flight check began. Not missing a beat, she looks over at me and says, "I bet I can get you out of this parking lot in 30 minutes or less! Just like Domino's pizza, baby!"

I might have laughed till I cried and maybe wet myself a lil!

I tend to take a while to get going too, however, what happens when I get in the car is the following:

get in
pull skirt in, if wearing one, cuz they always drag
shut door
lock door
turn key
a/c on

THEN, and only then, I fiddle with the other stuff.

I melt too.

DapperButch · 08-25-2011, 05:22 AM

Doesn't anybody open the windows to get all the hot air out before turning on the A/C? Only for a moment or two. As you take your turns to ride through/get out of the parking lot the cross winds really blow the hot air out. Much more efficient, I think!

Of course, I get in the car and immediately start moving as soon as the seat belt clicks.

Gentle Tiger · 08-23-2011, 09:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

Ebon and I were driving down the road and slowed at a red light. I stopped just behind a turn in for a Sonic and then I realized that it was the entrance opening and not the exit, so I scooted up some in case someone behind me wanted in.

No sooner did I do that, but some lady took the long way around the parking lot and came up to the entrance to exit, which was blocked by me at that point. I started mumbling about her just "having" to wait until I'd pulled up and yada yada yada about her going out the wrong way and just fussing in general.

Ebon rubs my shoulder and says, "Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault. How could you know that she'd do that? Don't worry about it. Let's talk about something else." in an incredibly annoying tone of voice.

Insert the creation, deliverance and receipt of "THE EYE" from me to him.

I say, "Do NOT dismiss me!"

Ebon says, as he pats my knee, "I'm not, honey. I'm just being patronizing."

Let's just say, the man is DAMN lucky the light changed at that moment.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DapperButch

I love Ebon!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scorp

LMFAO!!! Sorry Gemme, but that is just too damn funny because he sounds a bit like me...LOLOL

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gemme

No apologies necessary. We torment one another regularly and both of us have a VERY sharp edge to our wit.

I'll get him back.

Reason# 86 why I enjoy watching you two.

08-14-2011, 09:40 PM	#1
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,498 Thanked 107,924 Times in 25,666 Posts Rep Power: 21474888	Not the house, but close enough... Ebon and I were driving down the road and slowed at a red light. I stopped just behind a turn in for a Sonic and then I realized that it was the entrance opening and not the exit, so I scooted up some in case someone behind me wanted in. No sooner did I do that, but some lady took the long way around the parking lot and came up to the entrance to exit, which was blocked by me at that point. I started mumbling about her just "having" to wait until I'd pulled up and yada yada yada about her going out the wrong way and just fussing in general. Ebon rubs my shoulder and says, "Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault. How could you know that she'd do that? Don't worry about it. Let's talk about something else." in an incredibly annoying tone of voice. Insert the creation, deliverance and receipt of "THE EYE" from me to him. I say, "Do NOT dismiss me!" Ebon says, as he pats my knee, "I'm not, honey. I'm just being patronizing." Let's just say, the man is DAMN lucky the light changed at that moment. __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated. Last edited by Gemme; 08-14-2011 at 09:51 PM.

08-22-2011, 05:40 PM	#5
always2late Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: m'lady Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NJ Posts: 2,000 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,834 Thanked 6,231 Times in 1,462 Posts Rep Power: 21474855	My friend and I discussing how fast our kids are growing up: L: Oh my God, they are getting so big so fast. It makes me feel so old. Do you realize I'm almost 28? Me: Are you crazy?? I WISH I was 28! You DO realize I'm 43 right? L: Yeah, but you're like the Halle Berry 43 and I'm the Gary Coleman 28!! I laughed so hard I almost wet my pants...sigh another sign of getting older. LOL __________________ Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there ~ Rumi

08-25-2011, 05:22 AM	#10
DapperButch Roadster Guy How Do You Identify?: FTM, Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?: He Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Northeast Posts: 7,745 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 26,545 Thanked 26,809 Times in 5,771 Posts Rep Power: 21474858	Doesn't anybody open the windows to get all the hot air out before turning on the A/C? Only for a moment or two. As you take your turns to ride through/get out of the parking lot the cross winds really blow the hot air out. Much more efficient, I think! Of course, I get in the car and immediately start moving as soon as the seat belt clicks. __________________ -Dapper Are you educated or indoctrinated?

08-23-2011, 09:04 PM	#6
christie Member How Do You Identify?: A Force with which to be reckoned Preferred Pronoun?: just be nice... Relationship Status: I call her Mine Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Transplanted to the PNW Posts: 1,246 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,552 Thanked 2,476 Times in 706 Posts Rep Power: 14753263	So I have this canning/jam addiction. It requires many things from Wally World. We live 60 miles from anywhere other than Wally World, so in as much as I dislike their employment practices as well as it being a concerted effort to buy things NOT made in china, we do support our local economy quite a bit. Especially when I am canning. If Jess is driving (which happens most times, I commute enough during the week, I usually don't drive any on the weekends), it takes her SO long to get situated and get the car started and out of the parking lot. Its usually 8000 degrees and all I want is the AC on and to escape the parking lot before another person decides to engage me in some inane conversation telling me their woes. We have had many, many, many, MANY conversations (ok, me snipping at Jess, really) about how long it takes to take cigarettes out of pocket, find sunglasses, put on seatbelt, fumble for cigarettes, take one out of the pack, put the pack back in the console, fumble for a lighter that has usually fallen to the bottom of the console, check the seatbelt and FINALLY, bless the gods, put the key in the ignition and turn on the AC. All while I have been melting in the passenger seat, wishing I had gotten a couple of bottles of water to stave off the dehydration sure to ensue. Don't even get me started on how long it actually takes to back out of the parking space and drive the 500 feet to the highway. I should start packing a lunch. Last weekend, we get the cart unloaded, hop in the car and I suppose I might have given Jess "the LOOK" and a, "HONEY!!!" as the pre-flight check began. Not missing a beat, she looks over at me and says, "I bet I can get you out of this parking lot in 30 minutes or less! Just like Domino's pizza, baby!" I might have laughed till I cried and maybe wet myself a lil!

08-23-2011, 09:09 PM	#7
Jess Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: decidedly indifferent Preferred Pronoun?: other Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Patrick Springs, VA Posts: 2,812 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,247 Thanked 5,700 Times in 1,682 Posts Rep Power: 0	hrmph... I have YET to have an accident in a parking lot... safety first baby, I gots precious cargo on board!