Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers!

KimbaYLRF · 11-10-2011, 07:46 AM

Hi all, I am new here and saw this thread. Thanks for whoever started it.

Two years ago in March we lost my dad to a rare form of kidney cancer. My mom's cousin was there one day a week to help, my daughter was there one day a week to help, my younger sister and I were there two days a week each. My mom was working so there was no doubt that since he was home with Hospice we would be there so she could still work. I was there Thurs. evenings and Saturdays.

My mom was with my dad everyday after work. She slept on the couch so if he needed anything at night or had to get to the bathroom she could help him. He had a hospital bed in the living room. She never once babied him, just talked to him as she normally would. They were close but his last few months brought them closer.

My dad hated to "bother" us as he would say. One day after having to clean him after he had an accident on the way to the toilet, he kept apologizing to me because I had to do that for him. I told him he did for us when we couldn't do for ourselves, now it is our turn to help him. We do what we do for you because we love you. My dad cried that day. It was the first time I ever saw my dad cry. It was maybe three weeks before he died.

Not once did my dad complain about his pain, he was always upbeat and also fun when he was on his pain meds...LMAO We had so many laughs with him.

My dad died with dignity. He was my hero. The only regret I have is not telling him the things I wanted to. He did know I loved him and appreciated him.

Tommi · 11-10-2011, 08:13 AM

Thanks for stopping by KimbaYLRF.

What a great post about love and support. I am so glad you were able to spend time with him during his illness. I know even if we don't get to say all the things we want to, our loved ones know from our eyes and our hearts, how very much they mean to us, and that we will miss them sooo.

11-10-2011, 07:46 AM	#1
KimbaYLRF Junior Member How Do You Identify?: I originally posted femme, but not quite I am femme. Maybe a 'tweener. Relationship Status: On the way to being single Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: MA Posts: 61 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 149 Thanked 331 Times in 48 Posts Rep Power: 3875347	I was a care giver Hi all, I am new here and saw this thread. Thanks for whoever started it. Two years ago in March we lost my dad to a rare form of kidney cancer. My mom's cousin was there one day a week to help, my daughter was there one day a week to help, my younger sister and I were there two days a week each. My mom was working so there was no doubt that since he was home with Hospice we would be there so she could still work. I was there Thurs. evenings and Saturdays. My mom was with my dad everyday after work. She slept on the couch so if he needed anything at night or had to get to the bathroom she could help him. He had a hospital bed in the living room. She never once babied him, just talked to him as she normally would. They were close but his last few months brought them closer. My dad hated to "bother" us as he would say. One day after having to clean him after he had an accident on the way to the toilet, he kept apologizing to me because I had to do that for him. I told him he did for us when we couldn't do for ourselves, now it is our turn to help him. We do what we do for you because we love you. My dad cried that day. It was the first time I ever saw my dad cry. It was maybe three weeks before he died. Not once did my dad complain about his pain, he was always upbeat and also fun when he was on his pain meds...LMAO We had so many laughs with him. My dad died with dignity. He was my hero. The only regret I have is not telling him the things I wanted to. He did know I loved him and appreciated him.

11-10-2011, 08:13 AM	#2
Tommi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Usually "Hello" Relationship Status: Married and Bound to Tommi's kaijira (Ts_kaijira ) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Suthun.... California that is. Across the ridge from Laguna Beach. Posts: 8,151 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,621 Thanked 21,338 Times in 5,970 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	Thanks for stopping by KimbaYLRF. What a great post about love and support. I am so glad you were able to spend time with him during his illness. I know even if we don't get to say all the things we want to, our loved ones know from our eyes and our hearts, how very much they mean to us, and that we will miss them sooo.