Bully - The Movie

[gaea]

Originally Posted by LaneyDoll

Once again Gaea, our similiarites abound.

My son was threatened at school, after hours, at a science team practice. The moment I found out, I called the school, left a message on the principal's voice mail explaining what happened & ended the call with "I will be at the school at 8 in the morning, please be ready to see me about this."

I received a phone call within 30 minutes. By then, I had reviewed the school policies and told the principal, "this appears to be a level three violation and I expect that something will be done." He told me that they have very few offenses of that caliber but he would review the tapes the next morning with the school resource officer. Guess what??? Level three as I predicted.

The child was suspended for three days. I had to go to the school & file out a police reported that basically charged the child with assault. But, I had discussed the incident with the SRO & learned that my filing the report would result in the child being permanently removed from the school system & being placed in an alternative/reform school. That was a hard pill to swallow.

So, I held the report. I had one year to file it and decided to not rush things.

I sent a verbal message to the parents (via the SRO) that I was willing to let them handle things with their son. But I also explained that if there was even a tiny hint of trouble out of their child OR his friends, I would be at the court house the next day-no exceptions. I talked over my thoughts with my son who agreed.

And, there was no more trouble at all. I offered the parents a chance to handle things because I considered that we all speak out of turn and that one day, one of my kids might need that second chance.

Col was in seventh grade. The incident started because he "broke up" with a girl who went crying to a friend. The friend was the instigator.

I hope that everything worked out for your daughter as they did for my son.

The only thing my daughter was ever aware of was that 3 of her so called "friends" moved to a different school, my daughter was unaware of the threats she was only in the second grade. If she were aware of any threats directly stated to her she never came to me about them.

What i heard was on my answering machine and i always listened to my messages via my handset, her dad heard them as well and i think he went in the bathroom and puked, thus i knew it was up to me to handle.

Because of the severity of the threats and the actual "knowledge" these 3 girls had of things in the sexual nature it would have been a nightmare for the "parents" had the principal not followed through with my request, i have no doubt cps would have gotten involved too, I just wanted these "girls" far the hell away from my kid...Now mind you it was my understanding all the parents were brought in and listened to the vile things their kids had threatened to do if they got their kids help i'm not aware of it.

I'm glad did what you did Laney, I firmly believe that its our jobs as parents to protect our young and ensure that the schools do the same. I also firmly believe that its our jobs as parents to teach our children to be kind to others.

ps. i have often been referred to as a Momma Bear...have no doubts lol

[LaneyDoll]

Originally Posted by gaea

I'm glad did what you did Laney, I firmly believe that its our jobs as parents to protect our young and ensure that the schools do the same. I also firmly believe that its our jobs as parents to teach our children to be kind to others.

ps. i have often been referred to as a Momma Bear...have no doubts lol

Thank you! What I did was NOT easy. I was hoping to give the kid a break & had heard that alternative schools can sometimes "grow" the bad in a child. I wanted that child to have a chance.

But, I also had to weigh the thought "what if things escalate & Col really gets hurt & I could have prevented it by turning this paper in?"

OMG it is impossible to explain how heavily the idea weighed upon me.

Oh, and I am a Mama Bear too. You are far better off if you hurt me than if you hurt my children or my pup.

[gaea]

Originally Posted by LaneyDoll

Thank you! What I did was NOT easy. I was hoping to give the kid a break & had heard that alternative schools can sometimes "grow" the bad in a child. I wanted that child to have a chance.

But, I also had to weigh the thought "what if things escalate & Col really gets hurt & I could have prevented it by turning this paper in?"

OMG it is impossible to explain how heavily the idea weighed upon me.

Oh, and I am a Mama Bear too. You are far better off if you hurt me than if you hurt my children or my pup.

Right??????

[Scuba]

Laney, Gea you two are great!! I agree that the school has an obligation to protect children but the overall responsibility is on the parents or guardians. Some parents, just refuse to take and active role in their child's upbringing. My most favorite line in any movie ever was from "Parenthood". When Keanu Reeves says to the mom "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.
".

What's even more disturbing is when these parents defend their child's behavior. Often it's a "my child would never do anything like that" kind of comment. And how would they know anyway? Half the time they have NO idea what their kid is doing, where they are and who they are hanging out with. I've seen this happen up close and personal. It's both sad and infuriating.

[gaea]

Originally Posted by Scuba

Laney, Gea you two are great!! I agree that the school has an obligation to protect children but the overall responsibility is on the parents or guardians. Some parents, just refuse to take and active role in their child's upbringing. My most favorite line in any movie ever was from "Parenthood". When Keanu Reeves says to the mom "You know, Mrs. Buckman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.
".

What's even more disturbing is when these parents defend their child's behavior. Often it's a "my child would never do anything like that" kind of comment. And how would they know anyway? Half the time they have NO idea what their kid is doing, where they are and who they are hanging out with. I've seen this happen up close and personal. It's both sad and infuriating.

I so agree 100% about the parents being active in the lives of their children from birth forward it is up to the parents to be responsible it is also up to us to take it up with the schools when necessary, ultimately it is up to the parents it starts at home. It starts from before birth.

Now for the heartbreaking part, there are so many kids that will not tell their parents when something is amiss at school and they try and handle it on their own or fear ridicule in the home thus difficult communications, i feel for both the parents and the children in these circumstances.

All parent / child relationships vary from one to the next. I hope that parents of middle and high school kids take them to see this film.

PS-Anyone can be a sperm or an egg donor, its takes a special person to be a "parent"

[StrongButch]

I will be going to see it Sunday Also on April 26 a movie called Gender Bender will be playing in Seattle hope to see some of you there (lol)

[gaea]

http://www.lgbtqnation.com/2012/04/e...bullying-bill/

Education Secretary Arne Duncan ducked a question Friday on whether the Obama administration was prepared to endorse LGBT anti-bullying legislation as the White House prepared for a screening of the movie “Bully” in the afternoon.

Under questioning from the Washington Blade during a White House news conference, Duncan declined to say whether the administration was ready to endorse the Student Non-Discrimination, or SNDA, but touted the administration’s work on the issue and called for solidarity in confronting student harassment.

Arne Duncan

“We have to continue to do everything we can to make sure that there is zero tolerance for this,” Duncan said. “I met with one of the young women in the movie this morning with her father. It was very personal for me and for the president because we all have children going to school now.”

Duncan said an “unprecedented level” of work has taken place under the Obama administration on bullying, citing the first-ever White House summit against bullying in March 2011 and what he said was the passage of state anti-bullying laws throughout the country.

“I’ll tell you, some of my toughest meetings have been with parents who have lost their children or committed suicide due to the impact,” Duncan said. “So, we all have to continue to work together.”

Pressed to clarify on whether the Obama administration was prepared to endorse legislation, Duncan didn’t answer and took a question from another reporter.

SNDA would prohibit and harassment in public elementary and secondary schools based on a student’s actual or perceived LGBT status. No federal law explicitly prohibits harassment against LGBT students in school.

Duncan ducks the question on SNDA as the White House was set to host a screening of “Bully,” a 2011 documentary about school bullying that follows the lives of five students who were bullied on a daily basis.

The screening takes place on the “National Day of Silence” on which students take a day-long vow of silence representative of the silencing of LGBT students and their supporters.

LGBT advocates have been pressing Obama to endorse SNDA for some time. In a letter dated March 7, a group of 70 organizations — including the Human Rights Campaign, the American Civil Liberties Union, Lambda Legal and the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network — to place the full support of his administration behind the bill.

Administration officials, such as Thomas Perez, assistant attorney general for the Justice Department’s Civil Rights Division, have previously said the administration supports “the goals” of SNDA, but have stopped short of endorsing the bill.