What Cracked You Up Today?

CherryWine · 05-15-2015, 03:26 PM

This adorable little girl is giving it all she has GOT.

Orema · 06-05-2015, 07:34 PM

cinnamongrrl · 06-08-2015, 05:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CherryWine

This adorable little girl is giving it all she has GOT.

LOL! Her choreography is way better than the actual stuff too!

Kobi · 06-09-2015, 05:37 AM

BEIJING (AP) — Rules making it easier to file lawsuits in China have led to a new concern over frivolous claims, such as one in which a man says actress Zhao Wei stared at him too intensely through his TV set.

Stare

Bèsame* · 06-11-2015, 07:03 AM

Having a conversation, recapping our day. He says, I'm so sore. I ask why. Apparently he was up and down the later most of the day. Hmmm, so what were you working on? We're you taking things up and down the ladder. He says, no I was doing floor work.

What? floor work ? I thought you said you were on the ladder?

I was, just checking to see if you were listening to me.

Ha ha!

On to next subject, after we laughed. I have the day off, if you need me to come pick you up, I'll take you to your appointment. He says, sure, you can drive around Mr Lazy.

Ok, I tel, you what, I'll pull up in the front, get out, walk into the lobby. I'll be the one holding the card that's says..pick up, Mr. Lazy!

How is that funny guy? We had our share of laughs this morning!

A. Spectre · 06-11-2015, 07:18 AM

Worked at the shop yesterday, the following is a conversation I had with a woman who brought a vintage cheese slicer to the counter:

Me: What do you have there?

Her: A cheese cutter! I've been looking forever for one of these!

Me: *with nary a smile. How have you been cutting the cheese?!

Her: With a knife.

Okay, juvenile humor, but this woman was so serious, she was very cute.

Behind the counter, we laughed and laughed.

CherryWine · 06-12-2015, 09:48 AM

This probably cracked me up much more than it should have.

Talon · 06-20-2015, 01:17 PM

ProfPacker · 06-20-2015, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Talon

she is so sick, I love her. Thanks, needed today

Blade · 06-21-2015, 06:23 PM

Setting the scene...
At Tractor Supply looking for dawg wormer, and finding it in a locked cabinet.

Jim an older gentlemen who works there came walking down the center aisle, close enough to me that I could hear his voice. I seemingly loudly said Jim I need to get in the closet. OMG, that took off. He said it takes long enough to get out of the closet don't get back in it. That was a good laugh for today

JDeere · 06-21-2015, 07:38 PM

Dad telling embarassing stories about my brother!

PaPa · 06-23-2015, 03:02 PM

Still laughing about my blunder from a couple days ago. The gentleman across the street went down to his fiance's aunt's house (a couple doors down) and I had said "Good Morning" to him when I saw him. He didn't say anything and just grabbed a cigarette from his truck and went down. In a few moments he came walking back and once again said nothing, went in the fence and into the house. All of a sudden the neighbor came down (she owns the house) and I began talking to her as she was walking. She informed me the water broke. I said, "Oh boy. Did they know where to shut the main off?"

Fast forward later in the day...sitting out front recounting story to my sister. She says to me, "Oh was it the house or her?" I think for a moment and the light bulb goes off. I scratch my head and say, "Ya know....I don't know!"

Sister of the woman across the street is walking down the street and I say, "Heyy Cheyenne! I have a question for you." I recount the story and she bursts out laughing and says, "It is her. Her water broke."

Well duh!! Who knew?!? Thinks to myself well so much for finding the main to shut off. LOL!

Now is that butch mentality for ya or what?!?

Kenna · 06-29-2015, 01:13 PM

An adorable little boy with his bright yellow Minnions tshirt on, trying to catch tiny minnows with his bare hands , at the edge of the lake up to his ankles in sandy water, bent over with his butt in the air and his face about 3 inches from the water...fixated on catching "phishies" ...when we got home I told him to go clean up and change clothes because he smelled like dead phishies...to which he responded by smelling his tshirt and saying "no...LIVE phishies!"...

SMH...thank god he didn't bring any phishies home in my car!

C0LLETTE · 06-29-2015, 03:39 PM

The woman that owns this condo I rent sent me an email bill for 15 cents for Heating/AC in May. She wants me to send her the 15 cent cheque by mail to her vacation home in Florida.
I've been trying to compose a fitting reply for 4 days now.

cinnamongrrl · 07-02-2015, 07:16 PM

I found this magazine on my client's nightstand today...

I just KNEW it had to be a southern publication...girls down here are all about their gardens...AND their guns!!

Kenna · 07-03-2015, 09:43 AM

My buddy and I running through the rain storm to retrieve the baby goats from the front pasture...laughing as I grabbed them to put their leash on...then all five of us running back to their enclosure, soaking wet, the babies immediately loaded into their dawg house...as I'm dashing back to the house my buddy says "look your hair isn't even wet!"...made me laugh as the water was running off my curls down my face...once inside, trying to peal off wet clothes, naked in the bathroom I realized OH SHIT!! THE DOGS ARE STILL OUT BACK!!

CherryWine · 07-10-2015, 06:06 PM

My partner called in a dinner order to our favorite local Vietnamese restaurant. Instead of using the number beside the menu items she tried to pronounce the words (poorly, I might add). Well, it must have frustrated the older Vietnamese lady/chef who took the order because when she went in to pick it up, in broken English the lady said, “Oh, you are the one who called in the order. Don’t talk to me. Only give me the number. You cannot pronounce right.”

Kenna · 07-15-2015, 07:57 PM

Listening to the story of three little mutts raiding the burlap bag of potatoes ...one mutt in his "cone of shame", one short legged, shy but silent troublemaker, and the other usually clueless goofy clown of the bunch... I cracked up so hard when I heard the whole story....now the Three Musketeers are called TaterTots!

CherryWine · 07-21-2015, 12:46 PM

I think the girl on the far left took dance lessons from Elaine on "Seinfeld." Lol.

Gemme · 08-04-2015, 05:59 PM

Giant Minion Attacks Drivers

06-05-2015, 07:34 PM	#2
Orema Superlative Soul Sister How Do You Identify?: Lesbian stone femme Preferred Pronoun?: She, her Relationship Status: Moving in a single file Join Date: Dec 2013 Location: Cottage of Content Posts: 13,596 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 41,439 Thanked 34,689 Times in 8,935 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	EGOISTE - laughing for days

06-11-2015, 07:03 AM	#5
Bèsame* Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femm Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: loved by many Join Date: Sep 2012 Location: Closer to the waves Posts: 15,383 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 29,120 Thanked 40,947 Times in 10,734 Posts Rep Power: 21474864	Having a conversation, recapping our day. He says, I'm so sore. I ask why. Apparently he was up and down the later most of the day. Hmmm, so what were you working on? We're you taking things up and down the ladder. He says, no I was doing floor work. What? floor work ? I thought you said you were on the ladder? I was, just checking to see if you were listening to me. Ha ha! On to next subject, after we laughed. I have the day off, if you need me to come pick you up, I'll take you to your appointment. He says, sure, you can drive around Mr Lazy. Ok, I tel, you what, I'll pull up in the front, get out, walk into the lobby. I'll be the one holding the card that's says..pick up, Mr. Lazy! How is that funny guy? We had our share of laughs this morning! __________________ kisses A kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back.

06-11-2015, 07:18 AM	#6
A. Spectre Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch dominant lesbian Preferred Pronoun?: She, Baby Boi Relationship Status: She is my sunrise and sunset. Join Date: Nov 2014 Location: North Shore Chicago Posts: 1,569 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,033 Thanked 11,075 Times in 1,495 Posts Rep Power: 21474848	Worked at the shop yesterday, the following is a conversation I had with a woman who brought a vintage cheese slicer to the counter: Me: What do you have there? Her: A cheese cutter! I've been looking forever for one of these! Me: with nary a smile. How have you been cutting the cheese?! Her: With a knife. Okay, juvenile humor, but this woman was so serious, she was very cute. Behind the counter, we laughed and laughed. __________________ * *Joy and Sorrow are Inseparable

06-21-2015, 06:23 PM	#10
Blade Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: TG Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Down on the farm Posts: 5,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,855 Thanked 14,413 Times in 4,058 Posts Rep Power: 21474857	Setting the scene... At Tractor Supply looking for dawg wormer, and finding it in a locked cabinet. Jim an older gentlemen who works there came walking down the center aisle, close enough to me that I could hear his voice. I seemingly loudly said Jim I need to get in the closet. OMG, that took off. He said it takes long enough to get out of the closet don't get back in it. That was a good laugh for today __________________ Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it.

06-21-2015, 07:38 PM	#11
JDeere Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Transgender Preferred Pronoun?: He/him/his Relationship Status: Single Join Date: Jul 2014 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 17,752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 31,018 Thanked 28,835 Times in 9,708 Posts Rep Power: 21474865	Dad telling embarassing stories about my brother! __________________ Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning. Albert Einstein

05-15-2015, 03:26 PM	#1
CherryWine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: lesbian femme Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The Deep South Posts: 2,491 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,060 Thanked 10,007 Times in 2,182 Posts Rep Power: 21474847	This adorable little girl is giving it all she has GOT.

06-09-2015, 05:37 AM	#4
Kobi Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian. Relationship Status: Happy Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic. Posts: 9,234 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 9,840 Thanked 34,630 Times in 7,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474861	BEIJING (AP) — Rules making it easier to file lawsuits in China have led to a new concern over frivolous claims, such as one in which a man says actress Zhao Wei stared at him too intensely through his TV set. Stare

06-12-2015, 09:48 AM	#7
CherryWine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: lesbian femme Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The Deep South Posts: 2,491 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,060 Thanked 10,007 Times in 2,182 Posts Rep Power: 21474847	This probably cracked me up much more than it should have.

06-20-2015, 01:17 PM	#8
Talon Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Divine Feminine Preferred Pronoun?: . Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: . Posts: 4,921 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 16,246 Thanked 10,223 Times in 3,305 Posts Rep Power: 21474854

06-23-2015, 03:02 PM	#12
PaPa Senior Member How Do You Identify?: GQ Butch Daddy Relationship Status: A Very Protective BIG Daddy... Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Pennsylvania Posts: 2,657 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 7,597 Thanked 5,871 Times in 1,530 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Still laughing about my blunder from a couple days ago. The gentleman across the street went down to his fiance's aunt's house (a couple doors down) and I had said "Good Morning" to him when I saw him. He didn't say anything and just grabbed a cigarette from his truck and went down. In a few moments he came walking back and once again said nothing, went in the fence and into the house. All of a sudden the neighbor came down (she owns the house) and I began talking to her as she was walking. She informed me the water broke. I said, "Oh boy. Did they know where to shut the main off?" Fast forward later in the day...sitting out front recounting story to my sister. She says to me, "Oh was it the house or her?" I think for a moment and the light bulb goes off. I scratch my head and say, "Ya know....I don't know!" Sister of the woman across the street is walking down the street and I say, "Heyy Cheyenne! I have a question for you." I recount the story and she bursts out laughing and says, "It is her. Her water broke." Well duh!! Who knew?!? Thinks to myself well so much for finding the main to shut off. LOL! Now is that butch mentality for ya or what?!?

06-29-2015, 01:13 PM	#13
Kenna Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NC & CO Posts: 4,806 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,624 Thanked 12,194 Times in 3,779 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	An adorable little boy with his bright yellow Minnions tshirt on, trying to catch tiny minnows with his bare hands , at the edge of the lake up to his ankles in sandy water, bent over with his butt in the air and his face about 3 inches from the water...fixated on catching "phishies" ...when we got home I told him to go clean up and change clothes because he smelled like dead phishies...to which he responded by smelling his tshirt and saying "no...LIVE phishies!"... SMH...thank god he didn't bring any phishies home in my car! __________________ **************************** She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~

06-29-2015, 03:39 PM	#14
C0LLETTE Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Depends on the day. Preferred Pronoun?: "I" and "we" Relationship Status: Very good. Thank you for asking. Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Canada Posts: 11,501 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 16,676 Thanked 15,175 Times in 4,338 Posts Rep Power: 21474860	The woman that owns this condo I rent sent me an email bill for 15 cents for Heating/AC in May. She wants me to send her the 15 cent cheque by mail to her vacation home in Florida. I've been trying to compose a fitting reply for 4 days now.

07-02-2015, 07:16 PM	#15
cinnamongrrl Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?: wild woman Relationship Status: No, thank you. Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time… Posts: 7,661 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 15,232 Thanked 27,598 Times in 6,955 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	I found this magazine on my client's nightstand today... I just KNEW it had to be a southern publication...girls down here are all about their gardens...AND their guns!! __________________

07-03-2015, 09:43 AM	#16
Kenna Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NC & CO Posts: 4,806 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,624 Thanked 12,194 Times in 3,779 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	My buddy and I running through the rain storm to retrieve the baby goats from the front pasture...laughing as I grabbed them to put their leash on...then all five of us running back to their enclosure, soaking wet, the babies immediately loaded into their dawg house...as I'm dashing back to the house my buddy says "look your hair isn't even wet!"...made me laugh as the water was running off my curls down my face...once inside, trying to peal off wet clothes, naked in the bathroom I realized OH SHIT!! THE DOGS ARE STILL OUT BACK!! __________________ **************************** She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~

07-10-2015, 06:06 PM	#17
CherryWine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: lesbian femme Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The Deep South Posts: 2,491 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,060 Thanked 10,007 Times in 2,182 Posts Rep Power: 21474847	My partner called in a dinner order to our favorite local Vietnamese restaurant. Instead of using the number beside the menu items she tried to pronounce the words (poorly, I might add). Well, it must have frustrated the older Vietnamese lady/chef who took the order because when she went in to pick it up, in broken English the lady said, “Oh, you are the one who called in the order. Don’t talk to me. Only give me the number. You cannot pronounce right.”

07-15-2015, 07:57 PM	#18
Kenna Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NC & CO Posts: 4,806 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,624 Thanked 12,194 Times in 3,779 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	Listening to the story of three little mutts raiding the burlap bag of potatoes ...one mutt in his "cone of shame", one short legged, shy but silent troublemaker, and the other usually clueless goofy clown of the bunch... I cracked up so hard when I heard the whole story....now the Three Musketeers are called TaterTots! __________________ **************************** She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~

07-21-2015, 12:46 PM	#19
CherryWine Senior Member How Do You Identify?: lesbian femme Join Date: Oct 2014 Location: The Deep South Posts: 2,491 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,060 Thanked 10,007 Times in 2,182 Posts Rep Power: 21474847	No need to waste money on a choreographer or professional dancers I think the girl on the far left took dance lessons from Elaine on "Seinfeld." Lol.

08-04-2015, 05:59 PM	#20
Gemme Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?: She, as in 'She's a GEM' Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: The roads are narrow here Posts: 36,631 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 182,498 Thanked 107,945 Times in 25,668 Posts Rep Power: 21474888	Giant Minion Attacks Drivers __________________ Gemme's Journal I'm misunderestimated.