"straight" women and Butches. - Page 2

Strappie · 05-08-2011, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Quintease

I suspected as much. It's a bit rubbish, sleeping with someone just to add to your life experience, though I guess it could be fun if you didn't mind being objectified..

Someone... PLEASE OBJECTIFY ME.... lmao!

Merlin · 05-08-2011, 05:27 PM

Like June put,sometimes we see things differently this side of the pond .. It doesn't make your thoughts or our thoughts any less topical.

Martina · 05-08-2011, 06:50 PM

Some of them are probably straight, and some are not. Like dykes who fuck men. Some may be developing a different sexual orientation, and some are just turned on by a guy or guys. We have no way to know.

i think it's only decent of you to assume that her motivations are that she likes you and wants to fuck you. Why interrogate her motivations unless she has given you reason to doubt them? Clearly you have dated straight women before. Is something about this one making you have doubts?

intrigue_in916 · 06-22-2011, 02:02 AM

[QUOTE=HowSoonIsNow;335284]For me: Female masculinity is hot.

It's not about the *best of both worlds*--it is about being aware of one's desires--and that goes both ways for butches as well as the femmes...and all people, no?[/QUOTE

I throughly agree that female masculinity is hott. I believe that a feminine lesbian compliments her masculine lesbian partner. Im quite frankly all the feminine woman i need.

Nat · 06-22-2011, 02:45 AM

There is so much I could say here, but it's late and I've already started over like 5 times. So here's an unorganized smattering:

Straight women can be fun as long as you don't fall in love with them and as long as they don't fall in love with you. At least, I've found them fun.

My partner has a long history of falling for straight women. She likes feminine women. Most of them have been straight. I'm the first femme she's been with. Heaven forbid we ever break up, but if we did, I'm pretty sure she'd keep dating femmes rather than going back to straight girls. I think it's pretty heart-wrenching to spend your life falling for women who will always be more interested in another gender than your own.

On a totally different note - I have known some butches who tend to measure/validate their masculinity by defining their partners as "straight" whether or not they actually are. As though straight women being interested in them gives them some sort of cachet. When I first came out, I dated a butch (briefly) who would have preferred to define me as straight in order to serve her own ego. It's hard to explain, but I've run into that attitude plenty.

Chazz · 06-27-2011, 09:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nat

There is so much I could say here, but it's late and I've already started over like 5 times. So here's an unorganized smattering:

Straight women can be fun as long as you don't fall in love with them and as long as they don't fall in love with you. At least, I've found them fun.

My partner has a long history of falling for straight women. She likes feminine women. Most of them have been straight. I'm the first femme she's been with. Heaven forbid we ever break up, but if we did, I'm pretty sure she'd keep dating femmes rather than going back to straight girls. I think it's pretty heart-wrenching to spend your life falling for women who will always be more interested in another gender than your own.

On a totally different note - I have known some butches who tend to measure/validate their masculinity by defining their partners as "straight" whether or not they actually are. As though straight women being interested in them gives them some sort of cachet. When I first came out, I dated a butch (briefly) who would have preferred to define me as straight in order to serve her own ego. It's hard to explain, but I've run into that attitude plenty.

Some people just can't move beyond a dominant culture, gender paradigm.

Butches do it to other butches, too.

Chazz · 06-27-2011, 09:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merlin

Is it easier for them to go for a butch,because visually they can maybe have the best of both worlds ?

Male looks,female anatomy ?

Not the best of two worlds - a whole other galaxy.

Merlin · 05-08-2011, 04:58 PM

June (loving the name) I know love takes all shapes and forms,what I wonder is for a straight or supposedly straight woman is a butch a way to explore their sexuality with someone who visually looks male so as not to give the game away ..

Soon · 05-08-2011, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merlin

June (loving the name) I know love takes all shapes and forms,what I wonder is for a straight or supposedly straight woman is a butch a way to explore their sexuality with someone who visually looks male so as not to give the game away ..

I don't know about that....giving "the game away"?....When I dated butches, it was quite obvious we were both women regardless of how they identified.

If anything, we were more noticeable and immediately considered lesbian/queer by the general public.

Merlin · 05-08-2011, 05:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

I don't know about that....giving "the game away"?....When I dated butches, it was quite obvious we were both women regardless of how they identified.

If anything, we were more noticeable and immediately considered lesbian/queer by the general public.

What about if she passes and is perceived to be male ?

Soon · 05-08-2011, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merlin

What about if she passes and is perceived to be male ?

never happened

Thinker · 05-08-2011, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merlin

What is the fascination ?

Quote:

Originally Posted by June

I don't know. Go ask a straight woman.

I'm with June......except I'd say you would have to ask each individual straight woman what her specific interest and/or fascination and/or attraction is.

There's no possible way for anyone here (or anywhere) to provide a definitive answer to that question. Anything anyone offers is purely and merely speculation.

*shrug*

Quintease · 05-08-2011, 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merlin

What about if she passes and is perceived to be male ?

Actually I did know one lesbian who frequently passed and so pulled many a very surprised and intrigued straight woman.

Soon · 05-08-2011, 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HowSoonIsNow

I don't know about that....giving "the game away"?....When I dated butches, it was quite obvious we were both women regardless of how they identified.

If anything, we were more noticeable and immediately considered lesbian/queer by the general public.

Addendum: I should have written, it was obvious we were both "female born" as some did not ID as women.

The_Lady_Snow · 05-08-2011, 05:09 PM

It could be "straight" is The only label she knows to identify with, sexual curiosity could be what she is free to do. Heteronorm is what is continually shoved in our faces vía media, religion, culturally. Then again I'm one to believe we're all sexually fluid until sexual standards are fed to us.

NorCalStud · 05-08-2011, 05:26 PM

I think it is the butchfemme dance most often. That energy exists in the atmosphere. It is a dance. There is all kine dancin....I have done alotta alotta that dancin. The straight women are saying they love and admire butch energy. They are attracted to those who are themselves regardless of societal pressure. Rebels and freedom are archetypical of strength. These are just words with maybe some illumimation. I always ask straight women why they wanna be with me...it is always desire.

Strappie · 05-08-2011, 07:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Merlin

June (loving the name) I know love takes all shapes and forms,what I wonder is for a straight or supposedly straight woman is a butch a way to explore their sexuality with someone who visually looks male so as not to give the game away ..

I have a few friends that are living the straight life. However they date women. Most of these friends date other femmes it's just who they are attracted to.

One of my good friends is a Married lesbian as she calls it. She is married to an amazing man and she has a girlfriend whom is also fem. This partnership works for them.

Doesn't matter it's the preference of each person as to what they like.

Merlin · 05-08-2011, 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by June

I don't know. Go ask a straight woman.

Am seeing one .. Although I think I have blurred her straight lines out

Corkey · 05-08-2011, 08:29 PM

Lets put a couple of misconceptions to rest shall we..
Male does not nor has never as far as I know been about being Butch. Butch is a 3d gender, except when it isn't. Not ALL Butches LOOK masculine, nor do ALL Femmes LOOK feminine, except when they do and if they want to.

You have some kind of messed up generalizations going on here from your posts that perhaps you should do some reading on this site to get some since of where these thoughts are coming from.

Again welcome to The Planet, and I hope you will explore not just the things that make us different, but those that make us a community.

Heart · 05-08-2011, 08:47 PM

Whenever I see a thread about "straight women and butches" -- it makes me twitch. (Haven't read the posts - so nothing personal.)

05-08-2011, 05:27 PM	#2
Merlin Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: Knight in shining armour. Relationship Status: Spoken for Join Date: May 2011 Location: England Posts: 250 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 87 Thanked 547 Times in 170 Posts Rep Power: 6763777	Like June put,sometimes we see things differently this side of the pond .. It doesn't make your thoughts or our thoughts any less topical. __________________ https://youtu.be/IWvEXChflEE

06-22-2011, 02:02 AM	#4
intrigue_in916 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Feminine Lesbian Woman Preferred Pronoun?: just dont refer to me as a 'YOU PEOPLE' or say'HEY YOU' to me Relationship Status: single Join Date: Jun 2011 Location: Folsom CA. Posts: 76 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 110 Thanked 133 Times in 55 Posts Rep Power: 289026	[QUOTE=HowSoonIsNow;335284]For me: Female masculinity is hot. It's not about the best of both worlds--it is about being aware of one's desires--and that goes both ways for butches as well as the femmes...and all people, no?[/QUOTE I throughly agree that female masculinity is hott. I believe that a feminine lesbian compliments her masculine lesbian partner. Im quite frankly all the feminine woman i need. __________________ Intriguinglyours

06-22-2011, 02:45 AM	#5
Nat Senior Member How Do You Identify?: bigender Preferred Pronoun?: whatevs Relationship Status: in a relationship Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Tx Posts: 3,535 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 11,042 Thanked 13,992 Times in 2,594 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	There is so much I could say here, but it's late and I've already started over like 5 times. So here's an unorganized smattering: Straight women can be fun as long as you don't fall in love with them and as long as they don't fall in love with you. At least, I've found them fun. My partner has a long history of falling for straight women. She likes feminine women. Most of them have been straight. I'm the first femme she's been with. Heaven forbid we ever break up, but if we did, I'm pretty sure she'd keep dating femmes rather than going back to straight girls. I think it's pretty heart-wrenching to spend your life falling for women who will always be more interested in another gender than your own. On a totally different note - I have known some butches who tend to measure/validate their masculinity by defining their partners as "straight" whether or not they actually are. As though straight women being interested in them gives them some sort of cachet. When I first came out, I dated a butch (briefly) who would have preferred to define me as straight in order to serve her own ego. It's hard to explain, but I've run into that attitude plenty. __________________ I'm a fountain of blood. In the shape of a girl. - Bjork What is to give light must endure burning. -Viktor Frankl

05-08-2011, 05:09 PM	#15
The_Lady_Snow MILLION $$$ PUSSY How Do You Identify?: Kinky, Raw, Perverted, Uber Queer Alpha Femme Preferred Pronoun?: Iconic Ms. Relationship Status: Keeper of 3, only one has the map to my freckles Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: La Reina del Sur Posts: 22,488 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 32,231 Thanked 80,119 Times in 15,678 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	It could be "straight" is The only label she knows to identify with, sexual curiosity could be what she is free to do. Heteronorm is what is continually shoved in our faces vía media, religion, culturally. Then again I'm one to believe we're all sexually fluid until sexual standards are fed to us. __________________ "If you’re going to play these dirty games of ours, then you might as well indulge completely. It’s all about turning back into an animal and that’s the beauty of it. Place your guilt on the sidewalk and take a blow torch to it (guilt is usually worthless anyway). Be perverted, be filthy, do things that mannered people shouldn’t do. If you’re going to be gross then go for it and don’t wimp out."---Master Aiden

05-08-2011, 08:29 PM	#19
Corkey Infamous Member How Do You Identify?: Human Preferred Pronoun?: He Relationship Status: Very Married Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Where I want to be Posts: 8,155 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 47,491 Thanked 29,299 Times in 6,640 Posts Rep Power: 21474859	Lets put a couple of misconceptions to rest shall we.. Male does not nor has never as far as I know been about being Butch. Butch is a 3d gender, except when it isn't. Not ALL Butches LOOK masculine, nor do ALL Femmes LOOK feminine, except when they do and if they want to. You have some kind of messed up generalizations going on here from your posts that perhaps you should do some reading on this site to get some since of where these thoughts are coming from. Again welcome to The Planet, and I hope you will explore not just the things that make us different, but those that make us a community. __________________ "Many proposals have been made to us to adopt your laws, your religion, your manners and your customs. We would be better pleased with beholding the good effects of these doctrines in your own practices, than with hearing you talk about them". ~Old Tassel, Chief of the Tsalagi (Cherokee) Last edited by Corkey; 05-08-2011 at 08:32 PM.

05-08-2011, 06:50 PM	#3
Martina Senior Member How Do You Identify?: * Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: * Posts: 4,999 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 13,409 Thanked 18,366 Times in 4,171 Posts Rep Power: 21474854	Some of them are probably straight, and some are not. Like dykes who fuck men. Some may be developing a different sexual orientation, and some are just turned on by a guy or guys. We have no way to know. i think it's only decent of you to assume that her motivations are that she likes you and wants to fuck you. Why interrogate her motivations unless she has given you reason to doubt them? Clearly you have dated straight women before. Is something about this one making you have doubts?

05-08-2011, 04:58 PM	#8
Merlin Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: Knight in shining armour. Relationship Status: Spoken for Join Date: May 2011 Location: England Posts: 250 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 87 Thanked 547 Times in 170 Posts Rep Power: 6763777	June (loving the name) I know love takes all shapes and forms,what I wonder is for a straight or supposedly straight woman is a butch a way to explore their sexuality with someone who visually looks male so as not to give the game away ..

05-08-2011, 05:26 PM	#16
NorCalStud Member How Do You Identify?: gaea's Daddy and Fiance Preferred Pronoun?: Ours Relationship Status: Engaged with gaea:-) Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Island Mountain Posts: 440 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,630 Thanked 1,465 Times in 359 Posts Rep Power: 18918587	I think it is the butchfemme dance most often. That energy exists in the atmosphere. It is a dance. There is all kine dancin....I have done alotta alotta that dancin. The straight women are saying they love and admire butch energy. They are attracted to those who are themselves regardless of societal pressure. Rebels and freedom are archetypical of strength. These are just words with maybe some illumimation. I always ask straight women why they wanna be with me...it is always desire.

05-08-2011, 08:47 PM	#20
Heart Member How Do You Identify?: Femme Relationship Status: rainbows! Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: NY Posts: 466 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 303 Thanked 2,531 Times in 412 Posts Rep Power: 12032609	Whenever I see a thread about "straight women and butches" -- it makes me twitch. (Haven't read the posts - so nothing personal.)