Cancer Support and Caregivers Who Are Trail Blazers!

[DapperButch]

Hi, Jo.

Hang in there.

I am thinking about you. :rrose:

[Tommi]

hey Jo,

You learned a lot of stuff>
I am sure it is heavy, but at the same time, it may be better than the vacuum you were in. There will be good days ahead.

Just keep deep breathing, and loving. :rrose:

Tommi

[Dominique]

Is it possible to actually get blood from the Port? Sure would make life ALOT easier.

There is so much I don'r remember, funny how the brain protects you. And it's been 10 years. Things change (daily).

My late Partner (for those who don't know and wonder why from time to time I pop in here) of 14 years had ovarian cancer. She was so advance staged when it was actually diagnosed (she ignored all symptoms) and made the decision to refuse treatment and passed away quickly and relatively peacefully. Sunday is Ovarian Cancer rememberance day (sept 11) double whammy.

The port, if I am remembering correctly, is an inlet, not an outlet. They don't extract information from any place they input medicine etc. so as to not risk a chance of a false read.

Yes, after all those bruises on the arm and then the hand, you alwost wish they'd leave a port in to remove, but I guess that requires alot of suction
until you actually get the blood. You don't want blood thats in the port. It's no longer fresh, no O2. Rambeling Sorry.

[JustJo]

Well, we're one step forward, two steps back...

I called my mother yesterday evening to discover that she had just come out of the operating room. Evidently the unexplained pain in her abdomen was continuing...the x-ray showed nothing...so they did a scan (CAT, PET...I'm not sure which now) and it showed a growth on or in the tube that connects the kidney to the bladder.

A few months ago, as part of the surgery removing the tumor from her intestine, they had also put a stent in between that kidney and the bladder, because the tube was blocked and the kidney had stopped functioning. The stent had come out later and things appeared to be working fine. I guess not so much.

They haven't told her yet what the growth is...a consultation will happen later today...but it could be another tumor.

My sister gets off the plane in Syracuse about 11:30 a.m. today. She got a one way ticket, because we have no idea when she'll be going home. :rrose:

[IttyBittyFem]

It's a silly question, but has me a bit curious.

Has anyone else noticed a change of texture in your hair when it grows back? Not only is my texture different, the color completely has turned much deeper from the normal blonde to almost a yucky mousy light brown. Am I the only one? Do y'all think this is temporary or permanent?

[mustangjeano]

Hi Itty, After 4 mo. of chemo , my hair which was mostly grey, grew back with a lot of dark brown hair that was much more curly than my usual hair. In my case it was temporary and about two haircuts later it was back to grey.
Jeano

[DapperButch]

Well, we're one step forward, two steps back...

I called my mother yesterday evening to discover that she had just come out of the operating room. Evidently the unexplained pain in her abdomen was continuing...the x-ray showed nothing...so they did a scan (CAT, PET...I'm not sure which now) and it showed a growth on or in the tube that connects the kidney to the bladder.

A few months ago, as part of the surgery removing the tumor from her intestine, they had also put a stent in between that kidney and the bladder, because the tube was blocked and the kidney had stopped functioning. The stent had come out later and things appeared to be working fine. I guess not so much.

They haven't told her yet what the growth is...a consultation will happen later today...but it could be another tumor.

My sister gets off the plane in Syracuse about 11:30 a.m. today. She got a one way ticket, because we have no idea when she'll be going home. :rrose:

Jo! I just saw this. I have been wondering how your mom was doing, but didn't want to ask again. Please give us the update if you have one.

[DapperButch]

It's a silly question, but has me a bit curious.

Has anyone else noticed a change of texture in your hair when it grows back? Not only is my texture different, the color completely has turned much deeper from the normal blonde to almost a yucky mousy light brown. Am I the only one? Do y'all think this is temporary or permanent?

Hi Itty, After 4 mo. of chemo , my hair which was mostly grey, grew back with a lot of dark brown hair that was much more curly than my usual hair. In my case it was temporary and about two haircuts later it was back to grey.
Jeano


Hi, Itty. With my type of chemo I didn't lose my hair, it just thinned out some.

My ex-partner's son (who was 11 at the time) had dark brown hair that grew back in a dirty blond and a bit wavy. I believe the new color remained, but I am not sure about the wave.

[JustJo]

Jo! I just saw this. I have been wondering how your mom was doing, but didn't want to ask again. Please give us the update if you have one.

Hi Dapper....sorry, just saw this....

Mom is still in the hospital, and we're actually expecting some more test results today from a blood test that is supposed to indicate cancer...I can't remember the darn name now....CE something, maybe...it's all running together.

Anyway...she'll be in the hospital "for awhile" yet. They had given her some medication that was supposed to help with the nausea, but ended up completely stopping all of the parastalic (sp?) action in her intestine, causing additional problems. That is now clearing, but she still becomes ill and has intense pain from so much as 1/3 cup of jello.

There is a stent from the kidney (that had stopped before) to the bladder, and something is going on there that they can't identify.

There is also another blockage...they've done x-rays, PET scans, CAT scans and something else....but still can't determine what it is with certainty, although they expect it is another tumor.

I'm getting sick of hearing "idiopathic"....which simply means they don't know what is going on and can't identify the cause of the problem.

The membrane that covers the intestines (again...can't remember the name) is cancerous...which is why they need to do the "belly wash" procedure...but can't do that until she's much stronger. They think that the cancer may be spreading from there, but can't be sure....and say that it doesn't usually spread so fast from there because there is little blood flow.

The chemo she's doing now is because of the cancer in the lymph system, and they may have to alter that depending on what's going on now. They probably will need to do a biopsy, but are taking a "wait and see" approach for a few days to see if it's a post-op lesion that may clear itself.

She honestly has wonderful doctors, and is a top-notch hospital....but they're sounding baffled to me.

My sister, who went to help, is making things worse rather than better...stressing out everyone around her and causing drama at the hospital....so much so that the doctor told my mother that he doesn't think she's an appropriate caregiver....and that Mom should come to me when she's ready to go (because her house, being a 200+ year old farmhouse) is not sanitary or warm enough for her to live in right now.

We're falling through the cracks on the "going home" part....Mom can't go to assisted living because of the IVs that need to change every 12 hours (probably for the rest of her life)...can't go home because she can't physically manage without help, especially in her house....and the only other option is a nursing home...which isn't appropriate because she doesn't need that much...she can take herself to the bathroom, she's functional, she can walk, etc. (and also because I have horrors about nursing homes and won't allow it unless I simply can't cope).

So....right now it's a waiting game. The doctors are keeping her in the hospital, trying to figure out what's going on. When she's ready to go home, she'll come to me...at least for the winter...and we'll all regroup and see what's what in the spring.

They told me that, given her diagnosis, the 5 year survival rate is 6%....most of which are the younger, stronger patients...and average lifespan from diagnosis is 28 months...again, with younger, stronger patients on the high end and patients like my mother generally on the lower end. With 50 years of Crohn's disease in her history, her digestive tract is a nightmare.

She has completed paperwork to donate her body for Crohn's research and/or colon cancer research. In a weird way, that's making me feel better....because perhaps it will help them learn enough to help others with these diseases.

[Tommi]

Check out hospitals that have Sub-acute facilities orn Skilled Nursing Centers that have sub-acute in your area. My friend Milana has been in sub-acute care due to esophageal cancer and complications due to the feeding tube in her stomach. She has medicare and applied for state medical.
She is ambulatory, and goes now is able to go out to her Doc's office for chemotherapy, and for PET Scans , etc. She went into the hospital to have the feeding tube put in June 15, 2010 and went to ICU because of compliactions, and has been in Buena Park Nursing Center sub acute-care unit since Sept 2010~~for a year, and in sub-acute for a year. Doc's said she has 3 mos to live. She is now back to being on the sub-acute patio everyday, in ths sunshine, pushing her wheelchair in front of her , with her O2 tank hanging on the side, and her favorite magazines. She meets the other patients out there and they play cards. With Respiratory and a nurse sitting by.

She does Wi Bowling everday, and crafts 3 times a weeek, bingo every morning. She is still sick from all she has gone through, but she has a lovely community of friends there, and doctors, RN's and LVN's and the best NA's I have ever seen. It took some looking until we found a place that would take her, and was clean, and had all she would need. Best regards, Tommi

Check with your state health dept for a list of approved places, or, in the state she lives in, and check them out physically and on the net/reviews.

It is a tough time for all, but if there is a will to live, like Milana , it is what they can do.

.
What is skilled nursing sub acute rehab care?

A. Sub acute care is comprehensive inpatient care designed for someone who has an acute illness, injury, or exacerbation of a disease process. It is goal oriented treatment. Sub acute care is generally more intensive than traditional nursing facility care and less than acute care it requires treatment plan for a limited time period (several days to several months), until the condition is stabilized or a predetermined treatment course is completed.

[DapperButch]

Wow, Jo. Just so much happening and going on. I do hope that things become clearer for her doctors and then things can go smoothly from there.

I want to make a suggestion to you. I don't know where you live in Florida or I would google it myself, but please consider her going to an Integrative Cancer Center in Florida for her continued oncology needs.

I truly believe in the approach that considers nutrition (and other things, exercise, meditation) as an important part of cancer treatment. They have had unbelievable results in shrinking tumor size and extending lifespans. She may not want to do some of the stuff (exercise...which can be as simple as an ill person moving their arms, or meditation, but maybe she would consider the food).

Additionally, and REALLY important, is that they base their timing of chemo treatments (including that pump we have talked about) around the person's circadian rhythem.

(and yes, this is what that book I mentioned to you is about...integrative cancer treatment).

Take care.

[JustJo]

Soooo....everything changed, yet again, yesterday...

My mother is being released from the hospital today, which I completely and totally disagree with, but the hospital and insurance company refuse to listen. She will be going to a friend until she can come down here, or be readmitted to the hospital for another procedure....depending on some test results.

Meanwhile, she cannot eat any solid food whatsoever....up to and including broth or jello. She is on IVs around the clock....12 hours of fluids, 12 hours of TPN....so technically she doesn't need to eat or drink....but it still freaks me out.

Luckily, she is going to a retired couple, good friends (and thank goodness she actually made some friends in the last few years, because they've saved her life....literally). The husband has experience with the TPN because the wife is a severe anorexic, and has been on and off of it periodically. So, mom is being released to him....with him as her caretaker for the time being. A visiting nurse will also come to the house each day to check on her.

Here's their reasoning:
They had put her on Avastin. Evidently, this is a chemo drug for metastatic colon cancer, but has some pretty scary side effects.....one of which is an increased risk of GI perforations and bleed outs. So....they can't do ANY kind of a procedure until it clears her system in at least 28 days. They can't do a biopsy, a surgery, not even a tube inside to see what's going on. We are literally just waiting....and they "don't see a need" for her to wait in the hospital for a month.

I'm furious. Why in the hell would they give that drug, with those side effects , to a 50 year Crohn's patient....when GI perforations and bleed outs is what KILLS most Crohn's patients. That's exactly what killed my grandmother at the age of 72....her colon perforated and she bled out on her own kitchen floor.

Holy shit. I know they need strong drugs. I know her cancer is being tough. But THAT one? Christ.

Meanwhile, my paranoia about digestive tract health and fear of processed crap and the importance of fruit and veggies is going through the roof as a result. My poor son.....luckily he likes fruit and veggies...cuz he's up to about 9 servings a day.

[Tommi]

Transporting Jo to a Zen garden nearby.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-CoyuXmJsVE8/TdQOPkEQzGI/AAAAAAAAADk/U7lF-kmcdUo/s1600/Deep-Breathing-for-Detoxing.jpg


http://www.vitadiscount.com/vitasprings/breathe-deep-tea-yogi-tea.jpg

This cancer stuff is bad, but the crazies associated with it are worse. Ya never know from day to day, wha t is around the corner...so, Breathe deep.(f)

[deb_U_taunt]

Tomorrow is my last chemo treatment! So glad to have this part of it over.

[DapperButch]

Tomorrow is my last chemo treatment! So glad to have this part of it over.

Woo Hoo! If you lived up the block we could go out to celebrate!

Congratulations on making it through!

That is no small feat! Kudos to you!!!!

:danceparty:

[DapperButch]

Jo -

Before you drive your kid nuts with the fruits and veggies, buy that book I suggested to you (heh). It will tell you exactly what fruits/veggies to feed him to keep him healthy. That book is the way EVERYONE should eat, not just those fighting cancer/people who don't want a recurrence.

Anyway.....

The constant changing tides must be making you crazy. :-(

All I can say about the Avastin is that they are trying to extend her life. It is the newest drug out there and seems to be able to give people a bit more time. There really isn't anything else that works to the same degree that one does for colon cancer.

Hang in there Jo, and keep posting.

P.S. Do you think if you took a few days off to fly up there to see her that you would feel better?

[Tommi]

http://www.city-data.com/forum/members/bs13690-83559-albums-animated-gifs-pic43401-way-go.gif

Yeah, for hanging in there Debby

[Virago]

I just got home from a motorcycle ride up in Alaska, the Yukon and the Arctic Circle to raise money for the Susan G. Komen foundation. 16 people from around the country were brought together to do this ride, sponsored by Progressive Insurance. You can read our stories at:
http://http://womensmotorcyclistfoundation.org/blog/
Mine is written under my Biker name: Trapper

We will be accepting donations until December. I know times are hard, but if you can, please donate. So far we have raised about $35,000 and would love to hit 40K. And if you can't, I hope you enjoy reading about our adventure anyway.

We paid our own gas, food and lodgings to enable all money raised, every penny, to go directly to the Susan G. Komen foundation.

If you are able to donate, please click on this link:http://http://www.info-komen.org/site/TR?pg=fund&fr_id=1120&pxfid=175589
Let's rid this world of cancer!!

[JustJo]

Jo -

Before you drive your kid nuts with the fruits and veggies, buy that book I suggested to you (heh). It will tell you exactly what fruits/veggies to feed him to keep him healthy. That book is the way EVERYONE should eat, not just those fighting cancer/people who don't want a recurrence.

Anyway.....

The constant changing tides must be making you crazy. :-(

All I can say about the Avastin is that they are trying to extend her life. It is the newest drug out there and seems to be able to give people a bit more time. There really isn't anything else that works to the same degree that one does for colon cancer.

Hang in there Jo, and keep posting.

P.S. Do you think if you took a few days off to fly up there to see her that you would feel better?

I finally got the book ordered :) ....thank you for the nudge and reminder. My brain is mush these days.

So.....the next U-turn....Mom lasted one night out of the hospital and is back in today, following massive vomiting, getting tangled in lines, disoriented, panicking, and her caregivers unable to switch things up properly.

Nightmare.

They are checking back into the hospital as we speak. My sister is getting harassed by Mom's friends to basically toss her life in the air and go move up there to care for Mom (which wouldn't work and won't happen), and now I'm questioning how well she'd do down here given what just happened.

The care coordinator is talking to the doctors, and she may end up in either a rehab care type setting or a sub acute setting (thanks Tommi....I actually knew what they were talking about!)

We'll know more later...in the meantime, I'm back on conference calls, dentist appointment this afternoon, and debating about whether I should just say hell with it and fly out. I can't afford it if she's going to be coming down here soon....but if she isn't, then I feel like I need to figure out a way to get up there with my son.

Ugh.

[Novelafemme]

Tomorrow is my last chemo treatment! So glad to have this part of it over.

WOHOO, Debby!! Doing a little happy dance for you! Right before I left for my conference/vacation I went to see our chemo buddy, Becky, on her last day. It was so bitter sweet because everyone got so close as friends yet we are all scared to end up back in there again with a reocurrence. It's so nice to have the support system and know that we all have each other's backs.

September 24th is our big Teal Tea event for ovarian/uterine cancer survivors and their loved ones. So we will all get to have a little reunion celebration and spend time together outside of the clinic! (f)

[Novelafemme]

I finally got the book ordered :) ....thank you for the nudge and reminder. My brain is mush these days.

So.....the next U-turn....Mom lasted one night out of the hospital and is back in today, following massive vomiting, getting tangled in lines, disoriented, panicking, and her caregivers unable to switch things up properly.

Nightmare.

They are checking back into the hospital as we speak. My sister is getting harassed by Mom's friends to basically toss her life in the air and go move up there to care for Mom (which wouldn't work and won't happen), and now I'm questioning how well she'd do down here given what just happened.

The care coordinator is talking to the doctors, and she may end up in either a rehab care type setting or a sub acute setting (thanks Tommi....I actually knew what they were talking about!)

We'll know more later...in the meantime, I'm back on conference calls, dentist appointment this afternoon, and debating about whether I should just say hell with it and fly out. I can't afford it if she's going to be coming down here soon....but if she isn't, then I feel like I need to figure out a way to get up there with my son.

Ugh.

{{{{{{{Jo}}}}}}}}

[deb_U_taunt]

I rang the bell today! I even sang 'ring my bell'. :) Surrounded by besties and came home to a houseful of friends. I am blessed.

[Tommi]

Wishing everyone a magical weekend.

http://img.xiaba.cvimage.cn/4cbc2986a7cc25b26ca00000.jpg

[DapperButch]

http://www.butchfemmeplanet.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3864

[DapperButch]

I rang the bell today! I even sang 'ring my bell'. :) Surrounded by besties and came home to a houseful of friends. I am blessed.

Woo Hoo! Awesome!

[Tommi]

I rang the bell today! I even sang 'ring my bell'. :) Surrounded by besties and came home to a houseful of friends. I am blessed.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v432/fireflye/06.gif

[DapperButch]

I finally got the book ordered :) ....thank you for the nudge and reminder. My brain is mush these days.

So.....the next U-turn....Mom lasted one night out of the hospital and is back in today, following massive vomiting, getting tangled in lines, disoriented, panicking, and her caregivers unable to switch things up properly.

Nightmare.

They are checking back into the hospital as we speak. My sister is getting harassed by Mom's friends to basically toss her life in the air and go move up there to care for Mom (which wouldn't work and won't happen), and now I'm questioning how well she'd do down here given what just happened.

The care coordinator is talking to the doctors, and she may end up in either a rehab care type setting or a sub acute setting (thanks Tommi....I actually knew what they were talking about!)

We'll know more later...in the meantime, I'm back on conference calls, dentist appointment this afternoon, and debating about whether I should just say hell with it and fly out. I can't afford it if she's going to be coming down here soon....but if she isn't, then I feel like I need to figure out a way to get up there with my son.

Ugh.

Man, sorry Jo.

I can't help but wonder if you wouldn't feel better if you went up there, saw her with your own two eyes, and then picked out the rehab place yourself. If she is that ill having to go back into the hospital, I really wonder if it makes sense to drag the poor woman down to your place. Ya know? Would she be even medically safe on the plane? Would it be too much for her? I guess she can answer those questions, though. I dunno. Just thoughts.

[JustJo]

Man, sorry Jo.

I can't help but wonder if you wouldn't feel better if you went up there, saw her with your own two eyes, and then picked out the rehab place yourself. If she is that ill having to go back into the hospital, I really wonder if it makes sense to drag the poor woman down to your place. Ya know? Would she be even medically safe on the plane? Would it be too much for her? I guess she can answer those questions, though. I dunno. Just thoughts.

Hi Dapper,

I spent all yesterday evening and too much of last night sitting with those same thoughts, and they're on my list for both her and the doctor. I know part of her would like to be here...but I don't want to wipe her out getting her here and then find out she can't stay at home anyway.

My sister is gone....was on a flight at 6 a.m., after blowing up my mother's car (driving an old car like an idiot and blew the head gasket) and starting a huge fight among the circle of friends that has been caring for mom so well....and then dragging mom into it to resolve it. Insanity.

I need to have a long chat with the oncologist and the care coordinator, and then with mom. Rooster and I may be on a plane heading that way soon after all. :rrose:

In happier news.....Congratulations Debby!!!
:cheer:
I'll bet that was a wonderful feeling....and a huge milestone reached. Bravo!

[Tommi]

Hi Dapper,

I spent all yesterday evening and too much of last night sitting with those same thoughts, and they're on my list for both her and the doctor. I know part of her would like to be here...but I don't want to wipe her out getting her here and then find out she can't stay at home anyway.

My sister is gone....was on a flight at 6 a.m., after blowing up my mother's car (driving an old car like an idiot and blew the head gasket) and starting a huge fight among the circle of friends that has been caring for mom so well....and then dragging mom into it to resolve it. Insanity.

I need to have a long chat with the oncologist and the care coordinator, and then with mom. Rooster and I may be on a plane heading that way soon after all. :rrose:

In happier news.....Congratulations Debby!!!
:cheer:
I'll bet that was a wonderful feeling....and a huge milestone reached. Bravo!

You can find so much more out in person, and , they can see a rational family member. I know this is tough to deal with, but there are some hills ahead.

Has she filled out a living will, Advance Directives effective in her state, and clear as to her wishes if she becomes too ill to make medical decisions. That is something I learned is vitally important when a friend of mine needed it in 24 hours, and did not have it done.


Expedia, Travelocity, Orbitz, . Don't know how long the drive would be, versus airfare X2, but it is an option.

[JustJo]

You can find so much more out in person, and , they can see a rational family member. I know this is tough to deal with, but there are some hills ahead.

Has she filled out a living will, Advance Directives effective in her state, and clear as to her wishes if she becomes too ill to make medical decisions. That is something I learned is vitally important when a friend of mine needed it in 24 hours, and did not have it done.


Expedia, Travelocity, Orbitz, . Don't know how long the drive would be, versus airfare X2, but it is an option.

Flights are booked....we're on a plane Wednesday 9/28...going up for 4 days so my son will only miss one day of school.

And, thank you Tommi, I have a list of things to go over with her...those items being on top.

When I spoke to her yesterday she sounded exhausted, and also clearly had no memory of talking to me just the day before and relaying the story of how she ended up back in the hospital.

Her version is very different from my sister's...not surprisingly...and maintains that she was fine and it was everyone else who freaked out.

I just need to get up there and see with my own eyes, talk to the doctor face to face, and figure out what the heck is going on.

In the meantime, the rehab/sub acute discussion is over....the doctor has decided that they're just keeping her in the hospital until they know what's going on and the Avastin clears her system. She feels better about that, and honestly so do I. She clearly feels comfortable and cared for there....and that's probably the most important thing at this point.

I still want to kick my sister's ass though.

[deb_U_taunt]

Feeling whiney today. I know this is the last time I have to deal with the chemo side effects, but this bone pain is kicking my ass. I am over the pain pills and being trapped in the house. I want a pedicure, too. Damn, I am whiney,

[JAGG]

I rang the bell today! I even sang 'ring my bell'. :) Surrounded by besties and came home to a houseful of friends. I am blessed.
Singing and dancing for Debby:::::DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD THE WITCH IS DEAD THE WITCH IS DEAD DING DONG THE WICKED WITCH IS DEAD!!!!!!!!!! :drummer:

[deb_U_taunt]

Everyday gets easier. Cleaned up the house a bit and did laundry today!! I have an appt tomorrow to get set up for radiation. Feels like the hardest part is over. :)

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_cLjM5_wo4f8/S4RGNUCs36I/AAAAAAAAABI/7SAbObUBhMs/S760/Over_the_rainbow.gif

[Tommi]

Everyday gets easier. Cleaned up the house a bit and did laundry today!! I have an appt tomorrow to get set up for radiation. Feels like the hardest part is over. :)

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_cLjM5_wo4f8/S4RGNUCs36I/AAAAAAAAABI/7SAbObUBhMs/S760/Over_the_rainbow.gif

Beautiful..Your happy is showing, and it looks good on ya.

[JustJo]

Hi everyone,

Just doing the "mom update."

I find myself sighing heavily a lot lately. It's just crazy-making.
I talk to her every day, and she's is better some days, worse others....to be expected.
Unfortunately, what I posted before may not be the case now....

In the meantime, the rehab/sub acute discussion is over....the doctor has decided that they're just keeping her in the hospital until they know what's going on and the Avastin clears her system. She feels better about that, and honestly so do I. She clearly feels comfortable and cared for there....and that's probably the most important thing at this point.


After undoing some of the damage done by my sister (which is good...the doctors are now actually communicating with my mother like a competent person again and respecting her wishes)....we appear to be back at "we can send you home to wait out the month."

Naturally, Mom is all for this...and they are training her to do the TPN/IV fluids changeover, with the understanding that once she can do it with no prompting or assistance....she can go home.

A friend has offered to spend the better part of each day with her...do any cleaning, cooking, take her to appointments, etc. And the nurse will come twice a day (once paid for by the insurance, once by us)....so that part is good...she'll have help.

I still have mixed feelings.

I know she'll be far more comfortable and relaxed there...which is important. I also worry because every time she's gone home, she's gotten worse. She's never had a nurse visiting her daily at home either though (as I remind myself), so any "worse" wouldn't get too bad before they put her back in the hospital.

My bigger worry is that Mom is now saying she didn't realize that the TPN was a "forever" thing, that the IV was a "forever" thing...and that she's unwilling to live that way. And, of course, the cancer isn't gone....there's more still there to be treated...and it's complicated by the long term Crohn's, which isn't gone either and never will be. She simply no longer has enough intestine left to support her life, period....so those artificial supports are not optional, and won't be "healed" out of....ever.

I respect her wishes. The choice, ultimately, is hers. No doubt she isn't the first person with stage 4 cancer to be ponderig the decision of ending medical treatment. It's just a tough thing all around.

I've told her that I am her ally. I will defend her choices, stick up for her, insist on everyone respecting her wishes...whatever they are.

When I said that, she started crying and thanked me...saying that all her friends, and my sister, would no doubt sell everything she owned, stick her in the closest nursing home and think they had done the right thing. She's right...they would...they started to until I intervened.

Thank you Tommi for the link to 5 Wishes. I read everything on the site, and printed it out....and it's coming with me, along with the composition book and a good supply of pens, when I get on the plane Wednesday.

I'm also reading "The Memory Palace" by Mira Bartok that someone (ack....maybe Novelafemme?) suggested to me. It's hard reading, but helping right now....and I'm grateful for the suggestion. Dealing with the mixed feelings coming up right now is hard going, and it's truly moment to moment and one step at a time.

Hugs,
Jo

[deb_U_taunt]

You are amazing..HUGS and LOVE to you and your mom

Hi everyone,

Just doing the "mom update."

I find myself sighing heavily a lot lately. It's just crazy-making.
I talk to her every day, and she's is better some days, worse others....to be expected.
Unfortunately, what I posted before may not be the case now....



After undoing some of the damage done by my sister (which is good...the doctors are now actually communicating with my mother like a competent person again and respecting her wishes)....we appear to be back at "we can send you home to wait out the month."

Naturally, Mom is all for this...and they are training her to do the TPN/IV fluids changeover, with the understanding that once she can do it with no prompting or assistance....she can go home.

A friend has offered to spend the better part of each day with her...do any cleaning, cooking, take her to appointments, etc. And the nurse will come twice a day (once paid for by the insurance, once by us)....so that part is good...she'll have help.

I still have mixed feelings.

I know she'll be far more comfortable and relaxed there...which is important. I also worry because every time she's gone home, she's gotten worse. She's never had a nurse visiting her daily at home either though (as I remind myself), so any "worse" wouldn't get too bad before they put her back in the hospital.

My bigger worry is that Mom is now saying she didn't realize that the TPN was a "forever" thing, that the IV was a "forever" thing...and that she's unwilling to live that way. And, of course, the cancer isn't gone....there's more still there to be treated...and it's complicated by the long term Crohn's, which isn't gone either and never will be. She simply no longer has enough intestine left to support her life, period....so those artificial supports are not optional, and won't be "healed" out of....ever.

I respect her wishes. The choice, ultimately, is hers. No doubt she isn't the first person with stage 4 cancer to be ponderig the decision of ending medical treatment. It's just a tough thing all around.

I've told her that I am her ally. I will defend her choices, stick up for her, insist on everyone respecting her wishes...whatever they are.

When I said that, she started crying and thanked me...saying that all her friends, and my sister, would no doubt sell everything she owned, stick her in the closest nursing home and think they had done the right thing. She's right...they would...they started to until I intervened.

Thank you Tommi for the link to 5 Wishes. I read everything on the site, and printed it out....and it's coming with me, along with the composition book and a good supply of pens, when I get on the plane Wednesday.

I'm also reading "The Memory Palace" by Mira Bartok that someone (ack....maybe Novelafemme?) suggested to me. It's hard reading, but helping right now....and I'm grateful for the suggestion. Dealing with the mixed feelings coming up right now is hard going, and it's truly moment to moment and one step at a time.

Hugs,
Jo

[deb_U_taunt]

I get a break! I start radiation Oct 10th and finish Nov 18th. Dr said walking will help with the fatigue, YIPPEE back to walking the dog, when the feet stop hurting (she said give that a couple more weeks). I am feeling like I will be getting my life back some!!!!!

[JustJo]

Hi everyone :)

I'm back at home after 4 days of visiting Mom at the hospital, running her errands, taking care of things at her house and, unfortunately, having to patch up the damage that my sister did with Mom's friends as well as the doctors and hospital staff.

Overall, she's doing a bit better. She's extremely thin....skin and bones really....but she is now on a soft diet and able to keep a little food down. Nothing more than 1/2 a cup at a time, but soup, pudding, half a banana...she even wanted a strawberry milkshake enough to ask for one and drink an inch or two of it. That's huge since nothing has sounded remotely good to her for a long time now.

She's completed her TPN training (once I got her a new instructor, rewrote the instructions, and trained them on her learning style....did I mention that I'm pushy?)....but once we got that all right she sailed through and feels comfortable managing it herself.

She would like to go home for a week or two and then come here (once the Avastin clears her system and they get to see what this mass is), but that's debatable. The challenge right now is that her blood pressure is staying way too low (80s over 50s), and they are struggling to keep her fluid levels up. In the hospital they can pump her full with IVs but that won't work from home...so they're trying a medication that is supposed to help slow down the travels of fluid to the ostomy (no clue how)....but we have our fingers crossed on that.

Now that she can manage the TPN, if they can get the blood pressure and fluid levels right, then she can come here to me to get through the rest of the chemo, then build up strength and weight for a few months....and then comes the belly wash procedure (if she decides to go ahead). Right now, she's not sure. She did accept some counseling and discussion with a wonderful woman who does counseling with cancer patients for hospice....and I'm hopeful that will help her sort out her feelings and choices.

Mentally she is absolutely 100% herself, and as fiercely independent as ever...so the choices are hers, and I've committed to backing her up on whatever decision she makes.

Thanks so much to everyone for the support. :rrose:

[Tommi]

I get a break! I start radiation Oct 10th and finish Nov 18th. Dr said walking will help with the fatigue, YIPPEE back to walking the dog, when the feet stop hurting (she said give that a couple more weeks). I am feeling like I will be getting my life back some!!!!!

Epsom salt soaks may help the neuropathy going on in your feet.

[DapperButch]

Epsom salt soaks may help the neuropathy going on in your feet.

Really? I will have to try that one, too.

Right now I am on Neurontin, L-Glutamine Powder, and B-6.

And no, not working, but maybe a wee bit.

[Novelafemme]

Really? I will have to try that one, too.

Right now I am on Neurontin, L-Glutamine Powder, and B-6.

And no, not working, but maybe a wee bit.

Dapper, do you have horrible neuropathy as well? We haven't figured out anything to help it aside from ice water foot baths.

I went in for a checkup last Wednesday and she wants to do another surgery to remove a growth that has been causing me lots of pain and discomfort on my right side. I go in on the 21st and should be home that same night providing all goes well. Fingers crossed that there's no more cancer.

[DapperButch]

Dapper, do you have horrible neuropathy as well? We haven't figured out anything to help it aside from ice water foot baths.

I went in for a checkup last Wednesday and she wants to do another surgery to remove a growth that has been causing me lots of pain and discomfort on my right side. I go in on the 21st and should be home that same night providing all goes well. Fingers crossed that there's no more cancer.

Yes, but my neuropathy is not horrid. The Neurontin (Gabapentin) is prescribed by my oncologist (600mg twice a day). The L-Glutamine powder (35-40g) and B-6 (100mg, twice per day) was suggested by a physician I saw in Chicago, Illnois, Keith Block, M.D. (http://www.blockmd.com). Both you can get in health food stores/vitamin stores.

There were two other supplements reccommended to me for this problem, but to cut costs, I only went with the top two suggested (I am on a number of supplements in hopes of keeping away a recurrence).

I believe that Neurontin is the standard treatment for neuropathy (from chemo and from diabetes).

PLEASE let us know about what happens on the 21st.

P.S. Sorry I was a grump on the name change thread! I was only (ok, kind of), teasing you!

[Novelafemme]

tease away :) i am a notorious ignorer of the rules. ;) and if i'm not ignoring them i'm most likely just too lazy to read the OP's request!

[DapperButch]

Catalina -

I know that Debby told me she uses Aloe Vera with Lidocaine and someone else just mentioned to me that B12 may help, too.

[deb_U_taunt]

Really? I will have to try that one, too.

Right now I am on Neurontin, L-Glutamine Powder, and B-6.

And no, not working, but maybe a wee bit.

I am going to try it too. :)

[deb_U_taunt]

Catalina -

I know that Debby told me she uses Aloe Vera with Lidocaine and someone else just mentioned to me that B12 may help, too.

Its actually sold for sunburn relief, but its helped.

[Dominique]

Yes, but my neuropathy is not horrid. The Neurontin (Gabapentin) is prescribed by my oncologist (600mg twice a day). The L-Glutamine powder (35-40g) and B-6 (100mg, twice per day)
!

Funny how neuropathy affects us all a little differently. B-6 is interesting. It causes a full body flushing effect on me. I like the B vitamins, for more reasons than just neuropathy.

Ice cold water....no thanks. I prefer warm soaks. Cold metal sets it off for me. I have found a supplement called L-Arginine helps alot. The Gabapentin, made me feel like I was being electrocuted. The tip of my big toe is constantly stinging. Movement helps me the most....nothing like a good workout, power walk.

[DapperButch]

Funny how neuropathy affects us all a little differently. B-6 is interesting. It causes a full body flushing effect on me. I like the B vitamins, for more reasons than just neuropathy.

Ice cold water....no thanks. I prefer warm soaks. Cold metal sets it off for me. I have found a supplement called L-Arginine helps alot. The Gabapentin, made me feel like I was being electrocuted. The tip of my big toe is constantly stinging. Movement helps me the most....nothing like a good workout, power walk.

Hi, Yellow band.

I agree with the warm soak idea. Cold is what I am trying to get away from!

Even in the summer, I had to wear socks at all times because it cut down on the pain/numbness. I couldn't wear sandals and that is usually what I wear every day in the summer. So, on the one hand I needed the socks for the neuropathy in my toes, but I was hot b/c I had on socks. My mother got me these socks (can't remember where they are from...some catalog she got in the mail) that were only for the top half of your foot. Since I tend to not wear shoes in the house, it was really useful. Just thought I would mention that for those in hot climates...

Also, I agree with movement as helping.

I really like that this thread is currently busy. It is nice to talk about these things with others who are also experiencing them.

Have a great day everyone!

[DapperButch]

Funny how neuropathy affects us all a little differently. B-6 is interesting. It causes a full body flushing effect on me. I like the B vitamins, for more reasons than just neuropathy.

Ice cold water....no thanks. I prefer warm soaks. Cold metal sets it off for me. I have found a supplement called L-Arginine helps alot. The Gabapentin, made me feel like I was being electrocuted. The tip of my big toe is constantly stinging. Movement helps me the most....nothing like a good workout, power walk.

Just a comment on the B Vitamins. I took a B complex to help boost my immune system during chemo. My docs have now told me that FOR ME taking B1, B2 could encourage any present cancer cells to grow, so I had to stop that supplement. I take a multi vitamin that doc manufactures for cancer survivors (which includes Bs) and B6 (and I need to add B12) in addition.

I don't know if the B1 B2 discouragement is based on the type of cancer I had, or what.

[Dominique]

[QUOTE=DapperButch;430953]Hi, Yellow band.

I agree with the warm soak idea. Cold is what I am trying to get away from!

I have a pair of insulated rubber dipped gloves I keep near the refidgerator...reaching into there, or the freezer is pain for the rest of the day. I wear wool socks most of the time. I wear the thorlo's...they come in I, II, and III...and they come in all heights too....for example,in the summer, I wear the ones as they allow for maximum wicking, they sweating of the feet, in our case, if not released 100% will make the neuropathy start.....they come in footies in the I....now i'm into the II...and they are ankle height. Winter thorlo III are mid cafe. I also bought the wool sock liners.....again because of wicking. I wear these light weight gloves indoors. Too bad what they look like. It's either the gloves, or I am at a high level of irritable from the pain. I bought the gloves at REI. They were only $20.00. I'm typing in them now. (It's still cool and raining, and I have tingling hands and feet)...I went to pain management to learn about this, as it has been 5 years and is part of my life. They key to living with it is to try to not set it off. TRUE!

QUOTE]

Thanks folks for talking about this.

[Novelafemme]

the cold foot bath was something we read on the internet :) and thought it sounded fairly accurate. and it actually helped!

[Dominique]

the cold foot bath was something we read on the internet :) and thought it sounded fairly accurate. and it actually helped!

Hi CatalinaRose.......

I'm certainly not saying it doesn't work....it doesn't work for me. Cold accelerates neurapoathy for ME! Even if I am pretty warm, i/e like summer time warm...and walk into a/c....that will set it off. Dapper was saying cold sets his off too.

It seems to be different for every one.

[JustJo]

Hi CatalinaRose.......

I'm certainly not saying it doesn't work....it doesn't work for me. Cold accelerates neurapoathy for ME! Even if I am pretty warm, i/e like summer time warm...and walk into a/c....that will set it off. Dapper was saying cold sets his off too.

It seems to be different for every one.

I have a touch of neuropathy too (as well as periodic foot cramps so strong they'll bend my toes backwards, not fun)...from diabetes...and cold triggers it horribly. Warmth and massage help immensely.

[Dominique]

I have a touch of neuropathy too (as well as periodic foot cramps so strong they'll bend my toes backwards, not fun)...from diabetes...and cold triggers it horribly. Warmth and massage help immensely.

I have neuropathy from frostbite (so we are clear) They did microvascular surgery to seperate the good tissue from the bad. In fact, this is similar to how they treat the advanced diabetic cases. I was in treatment with and in PT with the diabetics. They told me neuropathy can be like fire (the cold water would make sense) it can be stinging and numbness. Sometimes my foot feels like a piece of wood (?) I totally understand why my feet would be subject to neuorpathy, but I don't understand my hands. They were not burn't as baddly as my feet and required no surgery. I buy alot of hand warmers in the summer (for use in the winter)....we are not suppose to use them! I squeeze them outside my gloves, and toss them back and forth between my hands. ~ remember the game, hot potatoe~

My Dr. suggested I wear therma-care heat wraps on my ankles if I am going to be outside. This will call for blood from your heart, and is such a
low dose request, it will not burn us.....it works too. (expensive remedy).

[deb_U_taunt]

Just a comment on the B Vitamins. I took a B complex to help boost my immune system during chemo. My docs have now told me that FOR ME taking B1, B2 could encourage any present cancer cells to grow, so I had to stop that supplement. I take a multi vitamin that doc manufactures for cancer survivors (which includes Bs) and B6 (and I need to add B12) in addition.

I don't know if the B1 B2 discouragement is based on the type of cancer I had, or what.

I was told the same. What is the name of the multivitamin you are taking now? I would like to start taking vitamins again.

[deb_U_taunt]

Hi CatalinaRose.......

I'm certainly not saying it doesn't work....it doesn't work for me. Cold accelerates neurapoathy for ME! Even if I am pretty warm, i/e like summer time warm...and walk into a/c....that will set it off. Dapper was saying cold sets his off too.

It seems to be different for every one.

No cold for me either. I get cold and I just ache. Massage and heat for me. I am hoping that the pain gets better soon. I can't stand or walk for long, but it hasn't been long since my last chemo.

[deb_U_taunt]

Tomorrow I start daily radiation for 6 weeks. I keep hearing its not so bad, it just makes ya tired. I am still nervous.

[Novelafemme]

Tomorrow I start daily radiation for 6 weeks. I keep hearing its not so bad, it just makes ya tired. I am still nervous.


{{{Debby}}} No radiation here but my sister and bf both had it as part of their thyroid treatment protocols. We are having dinner with a chemo buddy on Saturday and she did radiation before starting chemo and said she really didn't notice any side effects at all.

I will say a prayer for you that all goes well. <3

[JustJo]

Tomorrow I start daily radiation for 6 weeks. I keep hearing its not so bad, it just makes ya tired. I am still nervous.

Big hugs to you Debby....I hope it all goes well. :gimmehug:

Wanted to come in and give you all an update....

Mom is home (I know....surprise!), with lots of help including a visiting nurse daily, a CNA/home aide for 3 or 4 hours and a friend spending most of the rest of the time. She's glad to be out of the hospital after spending virtually the whole summer there...and even though it's temporary.

She's still waiting out the timeframe for the Avastin to clear her system...once it does they'll go look and see what this other mass is and make a determination about next steps. If no other procedure is needed, she'll come down to me in Florida at that point. If another surgery is needed, then she'll be back in the hospital for that and until she recovers.

They cut her loose since she was able to demonstrate the ability to manage her own TPN (which is in a backpack arrangement), and they're monitoring her blood pressure and hydration very closely. Her weight is up to 112....still very thin, but much better than the 96 in her clothes that got her admitted last time. And she's eating....all soft foods and in small quantities....but she's handling soups, yogurt, cooked cereals, soft fruit, etc.

In the meantime, chemo continues every 2 weeks, and will through the rest of the year.

She's decided to sell her house, and is home talking to realtors and boxing up things she wants to send to me, my sister and our kids. I'm glad she's come to this herself rather than being hustled into it by my sister....and she feels good about it rather than pressured and rushed. Her decision, come to with counseling....is that the remaining item on her "bucket list" is that she's always wanted to live in NYC, have a little apartment, and enjoy all of the cultural "stuff" that she enjoys so much when we've been there for short periods. So....assuming she recovers....she may transform herself into a snow bird, spending winters with me and the rest of the year in a short term furnished rental in NYC. It feels right to her, so that's the plan.

[Tommi]

JustJo,

This is good news. So glad she is doing well enough to be home, and to move on in her own terms. I am so glad she is able to talk about the future with you.

[Novelafemme]

Surgery update!

So my surgery has been moved from next Friday (the 21st) to tomorrow at 3:30. I've been in so much pain and have lost so much weight that my doctor doesn't want to wait any longer.

I'm off to begin the dreaded bowl-prep. Fun-Fun!

[DapperButch]

I was told the same. What is the name of the multivitamin you are taking now? I would like to start taking vitamins again.

Hi, Debby. I missed this until the other day and then wanted to contact my dietician before responding.

The multi that I am taking is manufactured by the doc I saw in Chicago. After blood work they determine dosage. I thought it was a "one fits all" multi vitamin (or "one fits all cancer survivors"), but it is not.

I would ask your oncologist if he/she has any thoughts.

Surgery update!

So my surgery has been moved from next Friday (the 21st) to tomorrow at 3:30. I've been in so much pain and have lost so much weight that my doctor doesn't want to wait any longer.

I'm off to begin the dreaded bowl-prep. Fun-Fun!

Ugh, the dreaded bowl prep. Please let us know how it goes.

Jo - thank you for the update. It sounds like several positive things are happening (how mom is feeling, her weight, coming to conclusion about the house). You must be feeling some relief.

[DapperButch]

I wear these light weight gloves indoors. Too bad what they look like. It's either the gloves, or I am at a high level of irritable from the pain. I bought the gloves at REI. They were only $20.00. I'm typing in them now. (It's still cool and raining, and I have tingling hands and feet)...I went to pain management to learn about this, as it has been 5 years and is part of my life. They key to living with it is to try to not set it off. TRUE!

QUOTE]




I meant to come back to this post. Yellow band, do you happen to remember the name of the REI gloves? I have a hard time typing in gloves and I am not looking forward to struggling to type at work again this winter.

[Dominique]

I meant to come back to this post. Yellow band, do you happen to remember the name of the REI gloves? I have a hard time typing in gloves and I am not looking forward to struggling to type at work again this winter.

Hi Dapper, It's raining and the stinging hands woke me up. I'm typing in the gloves now. They are made by polartech, the brandname is manzella, comes in male and female and for typing and in the house I wear the warm. It's the lightest weight. They are very sharp and do not look like you are wearing an isotoner. Its available in a warmer and warmest. I also have the warmest. ($70.00) I bought them a size bigger and slip the hand gloved in the warm right inside the warmest. They are not bulky. Buy them now, my experience is they sell out quickly. Popular gloves.

I hope this helps you. This has saved me!

[Novelafemme]

the hospital just called and moved my surgery up again! now it's at 2pm!

i'm sneaking in a smallish cup of coffee and then taking the kiddos to school.

send good vibes and healing energy this way and i'll see you all soon. :)

[Novelafemme]

Hi Friends!

Got the path report back today and it isn't good. But....I have faith and am gonna take the bull by the horns and tackle this head on. :) I'm also gonna take a break from the online world for a while, so if you don't hear from me please feel free to reach me via email: landphair@pharmacy.arizona.edu

so long for now and BE WELL, everyone!!!

[DapperButch]

Hi Friends!

Got the path report back today and it isn't good. But....I have faith and am gonna take the bull by the horns and tackle this head on. :) I'm also gonna take a break from the online world for a while, so if you don't hear from me please feel free to reach me via email: landphair@pharmacy.arizona.edu

so long for now and BE WELL, everyone!!!

Hi, Catalina. I am so sorry. (f) Please know I am thinking about you and believing that you can beat whatever it is you are up against right now.

Thank you for posting your email so that we can contact you.

[DapperButch]

Debby? Catalinarose (I know she may not be here)? JustJo?

Everyone else?

Update for me:

Weather is getting colder, but hands do not seem to be getting worse in direct proportion. I hope this means that the neuropathy is abating. In my feet, no real change, unfortunately.

I continue with the supplements I started taking after the testing I did in Chicago, have done pretty good sticking to a vegan diet, but have done crappy with exercise follow through. I have big sleep problems (falling asleep, even with pills) and find that if I exercise in the morning I drag all day (after 3 weeks in a row of exercise this never did abate..which surprised me), and then after work I am of course wiped out from little sleep ...around 10pm I feel wide awake and can't sleep, and then the process starts all over again. This has been a problem my whole life and I will never have an evening/night job, so....I dunno.

I still have a significant amount of fatigue for being off of chemo for 6 months now, so I don't know what that is about. Granted, I have no information that tells me I shouldn't still be tired, but it doesn't make sense to me that I would still be tired.

I need to call my oncologist's office because I either missed an appointment or didn't call to schedule like I was supposed to, as I know it has been 3 months since I have seen her. Also, I do believe that I am due for a CAT scan.

[Dominique]

Weather is getting colder, but hands do not seem to be getting worse in direct proportion. I hope this means that the neuropathy is abating. In my feet, no real change, unfortunately.
.

Good morning Dapper...were you able to get those gloves at REI?

I'd love to see you type the neuropathy is gone!

[JustJo]

Hey everyone :)

Sorry I haven't been in for awhile. Feels like we're in a holding pattern. My mom is home at her own house (now sans car thanks to my sister), which is probably good as she would be driving and shouldn't be at this point.

She has a visiting nurse daily, an aide who comes every other day for a couple hours, and a friend who spends a good chunk of each day with her.

Her weight has dropped a little since leaving the hospital, and she struggles to eat and drink at all. Some days better than others...but too frequently I hear that she managed half a carton of yogurt for the day. She was eating better in the hospital, even though she complained about the quality of the food.

She's on the TPN 24 hours a day...so that's enough food and liquid to sustain her life, but not to thrive. She really does need to eat and drink as well.

The timeframe for the Avastin clearing her system has passed and they are now talking about the plan for seeing what the rest of the mass is. What they find will determine whether she gets on a plane to come here, or has to stay there for another procedure.

She's 2/3 of the way through her chemo...and is now describing it as a race....can she eat and drink enough when she's sick and exhausted and everything tastes like metal to be strong enough to get through it? She has the expectation that, once the chemo is over, she will be able to eat and drink and have no trouble. According to the doctor, that may not be the case...but I'm glad she believes that. It can't hurt.

I know she's happier to be out of the hospital and at her own house, but I'm also worried about the feeling she frequently describes....that she now understands how people long ago just took to their beds, turned their face to the wall, refused to eat or drink, and died. She says she feels like that herself most days.

It's hard to hear.

[deb_U_taunt]

Okay, saying this with my mommy voice "make the appt!" ;)

I hope it means your neuropathy is abating, too. Mine is feeling a bit better since starting neurontin and swimming. The swimming in the evenings has helped me sleep, too.

Debby? Catalinarose (I know she may not be here)? JustJo?

Everyone else?

Update for me:

Weather is getting colder, but hands do not seem to be getting worse in direct proportion. I hope this means that the neuropathy is abating. In my feet, no real change, unfortunately.

I continue with the supplements I started taking after the testing I did in Chicago, have done pretty good sticking to a vegan diet, but have done crappy with exercise follow through. I have big sleep problems (falling asleep, even with pills) and find that if I exercise in the morning I drag all day (after 3 weeks in a row of exercise this never did abate..which surprised me), and then after work I am of course wiped out from little sleep ...around 10pm I feel wide awake and can't sleep, and then the process starts all over again. This has been a problem my whole life and I will never have an evening/night job, so....I dunno.

I still have a significant amount of fatigue for being off of chemo for 6 months now, so I don't know what that is about. Granted, I have no information that tells me I shouldn't still be tired, but it doesn't make sense to me that I would still be tired.

I need to call my oncologist's office because I either missed an appointment or didn't call to schedule like I was supposed to, as I know it has been 3 months since I have seen her. Also, I do believe that I am due for a CAT scan.

[deb_U_taunt]

Glad to hear she is referring it to a race. Plastic utensils helped me with the metal taste. It was a couple weeks after chemo, when food started tasting better. I ate a LOT of watermelon during chemo. Dairy didn't taste good to me during chemo and I usually eat yogurt everyday.
There were days I felt the same way. Cancer sucks and its normal to feel that way somedays. Has her Dr suggested an antidepressant?

Hey everyone :)

Sorry I haven't been in for awhile. Feels like we're in a holding pattern. My mom is home at her own house (now sans car thanks to my sister), which is probably good as she would be driving and shouldn't be at this point.

She has a visiting nurse daily, an aide who comes every other day for a couple hours, and a friend who spends a good chunk of each day with her.

Her weight has dropped a little since leaving the hospital, and she struggles to eat and drink at all. Some days better than others...but too frequently I hear that she managed half a carton of yogurt for the day. She was eating better in the hospital, even though she complained about the quality of the food.

She's on the TPN 24 hours a day...so that's enough food and liquid to sustain her life, but not to thrive. She really does need to eat and drink as well.

The timeframe for the Avastin clearing her system has passed and they are now talking about the plan for seeing what the rest of the mass is. What they find will determine whether she gets on a plane to come here, or has to stay there for another procedure.

She's 2/3 of the way through her chemo...and is now describing it as a race....can she eat and drink enough when she's sick and exhausted and everything tastes like metal to be strong enough to get through it? She has the expectation that, once the chemo is over, she will be able to eat and drink and have no trouble. According to the doctor, that may not be the case...but I'm glad she believes that. It can't hurt.

I know she's happier to be out of the hospital and at her own house, but I'm also worried about the feeling she frequently describes....that she now understands how people long ago just took to their beds, turned their face to the wall, refused to eat or drink, and died. She says she feels like that herself most days.

It's hard to hear.

[deb_U_taunt]

My update:

Half way through radiation, so have 3 weeks left. I am feeling good. I am getting some energy back. Been swimming and walking the dog, again. My feet still hurt, but seem to be getting better. Adjusting to living alone. Surgeon and Onocologist submitted to my insurance to approve a double mastectomy. This has been a hard one for me to accept. I am hoping insurance approves a reconstruction, too.

[DapperButch]

Hello, folks!




Her weight has dropped a little since leaving the hospital, and she struggles to eat and drink at all. Some days better than others...but too frequently I hear that she managed half a carton of yogurt for the day. She was eating better in the hospital, even though she complained about the quality of the food.


Okay, so I feel compelled to give my "dairy speech" here. I hope no one minds (Debby I see you eat yogurt too), but it will gnaw at me if I don't share this information. And this speech is for everyone, not just for those currently fighting cancer and cancer survivors

My understanding is that milk protein is 80% casein, which accelerates the growth of tumors and metastatis. The reality is that even those who have never had cancer have cancer cells in their body. Obviously, those of us who have had cancer probably have more cancer cells/mutated cells in our body than non survivors, so we really need to watch this.

One thing we can do to protect ourselves from getting cancer again is to eat things that either keep mutated cells from multiplying or eat things that actually can reduce growth of any tumors.

Avoiding dairy is one of those things.

As an aside, the 20% protein that is left in the milk is whey protein. Which just happens to inhibit cancer growth.

Jo, if your mom is looking for calories that are easy to eat, suggest she drink whey isolate protein drinks and get away from yogurt altogether. And everyone else consider a life without dairy/pass on dairy when you can.

/sermon


She's 2/3 of the way through her chemo...and is now describing it as a race....can she eat and drink enough when she's sick and exhausted and everything tastes like metal to be strong enough to get through it? She has the expectation that, once the chemo is over, she will be able to eat and drink and have no trouble. According to the doctor, that may not be the case...but I'm glad she believes that. It can't hurt.

I saw my life as being one week race and one week off from race when it came to eating (chemo was on one week, off one week).

I took advantage of desiring or just not minding eating during the week I was NOT on chemo and then let myself slide on the off weeks. That was at first. The last couple of months I had mouth sores on the off weeks, so it was really hard. The weeks that I didn't have the mouth sores and could actually eat I felt sick, so I really had to force myself to eat. There were times I couldn't even talk the mouth sores were so bad. Overall though, mostly due to being younger, I didn't have weight loss issues with my chemo.

I know she's happier to be out of the hospital and at her own house, but I'm also worried about the feeling she frequently describes....that she now understands how people long ago just took to their beds, turned their face to the wall, refused to eat or drink, and died. She says she feels like that herself most days.

It's hard to hear.

I can imagine how hard that must be to hear. I can also remember feeling something very similar. I remember being very impressed that there are people out there who have chronic, long term debilitating illnesses and choose to remain alive. That whole way of thinking feel so removed now.

------------------

[DapperButch]

My update:

Half way through radiation, so have 3 weeks left. I am feeling good. I am getting some energy back. Been swimming and walking the dog, again. My feet still hurt, but seem to be getting better. Adjusting to living alone. Surgeon and Onocologist submitted to my insurance to approve a double mastectomy. This has been a hard one for me to accept. I am hoping insurance approves a reconstruction, too.

Hi, Debby. I am an asshole. I just realized I never responded to this post after asking for information! Instead I jumped on the whole dairy thing!

I am glad to hear that things are going so well. I was worried that the reason that we hadn't heard anything from you was b/c you were very worn out. That is great to hear that you have been swimming and walking the dog!

Glad the feet are getting better, too!

I did not realize that you have to get a double mastectomy. I'm sorry.

I would think that mastectomy approval means automatic reconstruction approval?

[Tommi]

My update:

Half way through radiation, so have 3 weeks left. I am feeling good. I am getting some energy back. Been swimming and walking the dog, again. My feet still hurt, but seem to be getting better. Adjusting to living alone. Surgeon and Onocologist submitted to my insurance to approve a double mastectomy. This has been a hard one for me to accept. I am hoping insurance approves a reconstruction, too.

Hi you. Glad you are oun N about. Good news, the pending surgery will remove the bad gunky that may be hiding there, and .....the reconstruction will give you a chance to pick what cup size u want to b.

okay, it's not quite that easy, but I know thousands of success stories over the years that I have been active in this field. . :rrose:

Living alone was tougher than cancer surgery and recovery over 7 years ago. We broke up in Oct. I was diagnosed the next May..Life was drive thru's, eating off paper plates, struggling to choose dish patterns and shelf paper... Bachelorhood was a big surprise at every meal :byebye:, and ...the decisions on which appliances I needed ..ugh... ;)

[deb_U_taunt]

Hi, Debby. I am an asshole. I just realized I never responded to this post after asking for information! Instead I jumped on the whole dairy thing!

I am glad to hear that things are going so well. I was worried that the reason that we hadn't heard anything from you was b/c you were very worn out. That is great to hear that you have been swimming and walking the dog!

Glad the feet are getting better, too!

I did not realize that you have to get a double mastectomy. I'm sorry.

I would think that mastectomy approval means automatic reconstruction approval?

Dapper,

You are NOT an asshole.
I am starting to get wiped out and radiation burns this week. Gonna slow me down a bit. No more swimming until the burns heal. :(
Doesn't mean the recontruction will be approved. Shame to have to battle insurance and cancer at the same time.

Debby

[deb_U_taunt]

Hi Tommi,

Might be great to be a smaller cup size, too. :) Clothes will fit better and it will be easier on my back.
Living alone has been an adjustment, but much better than living in a bad relationship.

Debby

Hi you. Glad you are oun N about. Good news, the pending surgery will remove the bad gunky that may be hiding there, and .....the reconstruction will give you a chance to pick what cup size u want to b.

okay, it's not quite that easy, but I know thousands of success stories over the years that I have been active in this field. . :rrose:

Living alone was tougher than cancer surgery and recovery over 7 years ago. We broke up in Oct. I was diagnosed the next May..Life was drive thru's, eating off paper plates, struggling to choose dish patterns and shelf paper... Bachelorhood was a big surprise at every meal :byebye:, and ...the decisions on which appliances I needed ..ugh... ;)

[Novelafemme]

Oh dear, Debby...radiation burns...do I even want to know? {{{hugs}}} to you on all fronts!

I have to agree with the dairy issue Dapper speaks about. I have a very strong oppionion when it comes to dietary issues, so I'll keep my mouth shut. But if anyone wants to hear, feel free to contact me!

I am doing pretty good! Thanks for asking Dapper! I have another procedure coming up on the 21st and then I hope to be on the mend. Sorry if I am vague about all of the details. I tend to be an open book about almost everything in my life except for health issues. My mother was "dying" from age 27 on, so it touches a nerve in me to discuss my own health. I'd rather think there is nothing can keep me down for long! ;)

Thinking of you all!

[DapperButch]

Oh dear, Debby...radiation burns...do I even want to know? {{{hugs}}} to you on all fronts!

I have to agree with the dairy issue Dapper speaks about. I have a very strong oppionion when it comes to dietary issues, so I'll keep my mouth shut. But if anyone wants to hear, feel free to contact me!

I am doing pretty good! Thanks for asking Dapper! I have another procedure coming up on the 21st and then I hope to be on the mend. Sorry if I am vague about all of the details. I tend to be an open book about almost everything in my life except for health issues. My mother was "dying" from age 27 on, so it touches a nerve in me to discuss my own health. I'd rather think there is nothing can keep me down for long! ;)

Thinking of you all!

Hey, Catalina. I for one would like it very much if you posted your thoughts on dairy and diet here. I am a strong believer that the reason I ended up with cancer was my dietary choices. I doubt that anyone here is not open to hearing about nutrition, especially as it relates to lower incidents of cancer! I am sure many of us here (including those that just read and do not write), think about recurrence a great deal. I would love to hear your thoughts!

I hope that the 21st goes well!

:bunchflowers: <--- get well flowers

[clay]

Let me say that each and every one of YOU are such Brave Warriors! I have been in and out of this thread at times, since joining the Planet in May this year! I came then as someone who had been a caregiver.
Recently I was diagnosed with Endometrial Cancer...found on biopsy of uterus after an abnormal US showed some thickening of one side of uterine wall. My gynecologist feels this is in the earliest of stages and I am given a prognosis of 95% survival rate! I will take those odds!
I was referred to a Gynecological Oncologist in a town an hr. from me...at a cancer treatment center. This Friday is my first appointment...11/11/11..cool huh? I had my (yearly) mammo done last Friday to take results to her..and am having a colonoscopy done tomorrow with anesthesia. The Oncologist wanted those results also.
I am okay with facing all of this..and I am in a very positive frame of mind. I am going to fight this..all the way. My battle isn't as tough as most of you have faced...and I am in awe of each and every one of you. Some are facing this battle alone..some are with someone to face it with them..I am in that camp of no one to face this with me. For me, that is hard...but I have to trudge on...you know.
I have days of being afraid, of being so alone, and feeling so lonely...I try to stay busy, occupy my mind..but my heart..it is just not satisfied..it wants what it wants...you know? I know there are schools of thought..and I have thought them all..I just would wish for someone to hold my hand, tel me I am going to be okay, to care about me..and to be by my side...
Sorry I am crying and losing thoughts...I will come back later..
Thanks all you Brave Warriors..you make ME want to be just like YOU! I heart you all...Clay

[DapperButch]

..I just would wish for someone to hold my hand, tel me I am going to be okay, to care about me..and to be by my side...


You ARE going to be okay, WE care about you, and WE are on your side! Oh, and we will send Debby over to hold your hand!

Number one order of business....report back to us on the 11th. Not the 12th, the 11th!

I hope you have someone who can go with you on the 11th. Two sets of ears are better than one. Write your questions down before you go, even if you don't think that you could possibly forget any of your questions. Take notes.

And also....sorry about the prep you are going through tonight!
:blowingitup: (hoping to make you smile)

[DapperButch]

Okay, saying this with my mommy voice "make the appt!" ;)



I go on Wednesday. :byebye:

P.S. Please note the above post. You are the official "hand holderer" of the thread. We voted on it last week.

[Novelafemme]

Let me say that each and every one of YOU are such Brave Warriors! I have been in and out of this thread at times, since joining the Planet in May this year! I came then as someone who had been a caregiver.
Recently I was diagnosed with Endometrial Cancer...found on biopsy of uterus after an abnormal US showed some thickening of one side of uterine wall. My gynecologist feels this is in the earliest of stages and I am given a prognosis of 95% survival rate! I will take those odds!
I was referred to a Gynecological Oncologist in a town an hr. from me...at a cancer treatment center. This Friday is my first appointment...11/11/11..cool huh? I had my (yearly) mammo done last Friday to take results to her..and am having a colonoscopy done tomorrow with anesthesia. The Oncologist wanted those results also.
I am okay with facing all of this..and I am in a very positive frame of mind. I am going to fight this..all the way. My battle isn't as tough as most of you have faced...and I am in awe of each and every one of you. Some are facing this battle alone..some are with someone to face it with them..I am in that camp of no one to face this with me. For me, that is hard...but I have to trudge on...you know.
I have days of being afraid, of being so alone, and feeling so lonely...I try to stay busy, occupy my mind..but my heart..it is just not satisfied..it wants what it wants...you know? I know there are schools of thought..and I have thought them all..I just would wish for someone to hold my hand, tel me I am going to be okay, to care about me..and to be by my side...
Sorry I am crying and losing thoughts...I will come back later..
Thanks all you Brave Warriors..you make ME want to be just like YOU! I heart you all...Clay

{{{{{{{{Clay}}}}}}}}

Dear one, you and I are in the EXACT same boat. My jaw almost hit the floor while reading your post. Seriously, I have the jitters right now!! I also go in for a colonoscopy soon...that is the next procedure I was referring to in my earlier post. I had surgery last month and a carcinoma was found connecting my ruptured appendix to my colon. This is following a hysterectomy and the removal of my ovaries and fallopian tubes (a total of three procedures/surgeries.) It has been a crazy ride since late April/early May of this year.

I am so sorry you feel alone, but PLEASE know you are not!! Even though we are a small group, we are pretty darned supportive and TOUGH and we can help carry you through if you'll let us. I am the absolute worst when it comes to asking for and accepting help...even to the point of feeling the need to leave when things get rough. But I am working on that. :)

Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more about our situations. Honestly, I feel encouraged to know we are experiencing such similar realities. Just know you can lean on us!

Jo, you got it! I just got home from an ass kicking class where I had to turn a 10 page paper, so my brain is powering down for the night. ;) But I will try to collect my thoughts and post something tomorrow!

[clay]

oHhhhh Dapper...I almost fell off my chair laughing at the animated crapper...thanks, my friend...ClayYou ARE going to be okay, WE care about you, and WE are on your side! Oh, and we will send Debby over to hold your hand!

Number one order of business....report back to us on the 11th. Not the 12th, the 11th!

I hope you have someone who can go with you on the 11th. Two sets of ears are better than one. Write your questions down before you go, even if you don't think that you could possibly forget any of your questions. Take notes.

And also....sorry about the prep you are going through tonight!
:blowingitup: (hoping to make you smile)

[Novelafemme]

I still need to fill my Rx for the colon blow. :(

SOOOO not looking forward to yet ANOTHER bowl-prep. And from what I hear, this one is the MOST fun!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :|

[clay]

[COLOR="Blue"]First, let me say I knew I would have an army of comrades in here..and I knew I would be enveloped, held, loved, and cherished..I am not alone in here....for that I am thankful!! I am blessed..beyond measure...I think this is one of the most supportive, the most caring, and the tightest knit group of all..for the battle scars are worn with pride...and we carry one another...we hol done another..for we are mirrors of one another!!! Now, before I begin to cry again...let me finish.
I lost my wife almost 3 years ago..to Stage IV Breast Cancer..with mets to Liver/Lung/Bone/Brain/Skull/Kidney...that was her initial diagnosis[..we were told to make final arrangements and if there was a trip she wanted to go on, to go now.....she had to get 40 rad tx. right off the bat before she could even hope to get chemo....10 to hip, 10 to shoulder, 10 to cervical spine and 10 to thoracic spine.. She was one of first people on Tykerb after that...anyway she gave a helluva fight for 26 months. Liver failure...BUT she was able to die at home, in my arms, and was what she wanted...she asked only that I NOT say she "lost her battle to cancer" but to say she "passed her torch on..and I did! We had 15 wonderful years together...not nearly enough BUT I was blessed with those. Our relationship was wholly loving, healthy, positive, and one in which I would hope to have again. It was so good..and I miss her..so damn much. I know she would be here with me.and her spirit will be..and many others..and all of you here as well...thanks..
My oncologist will be doing a total hysto (uterus, tubes, ovaries, and lymph nodes, along with my appendix) and do follow up with radiation prophylactically! She is hoping to use the Da Vinci robotic arm and do a vag. hyst...so I am hoping that she will be able to do so. I will be at Hollings Cancer Center..a division of MUSC...
So, thanks each and every one of you Brave Warriors..I hope to be half as brave as each of you are....we need to have each of us a pink bandana embroidered....we had them made for my wife..and each of us wore them at the memorial service, had 45 motorcycles there..and released 30 pink balloons in her memory!
Ok folks, let's kick this Big C's ass.what say ye...I'm in...let's crusade on my family...I love you all...totally!! Debby..I will see you tomorrow. I am the one who is smiling....Clay/COLOR]

[clay]

hey C.R. I will share my exploding crapper with ya...after I clean it up a bit...it is nice!!!I still need to fill my Rx for the colon blow. :(

SOOOO not looking forward to yet ANOTHER bowl-prep. And from what I hear, this one is the MOST fun!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :|

[Novelafemme]

the Davinci (sp?) is amazing!! From what I have read it is the best at minimizing any spillage when it comes to uterine cancer. Your story is beautiful, Clay. I'd wear that bandana with pride!! (w)

[DapperButch]

hey C.R. I will share my exploding crapper with ya...after I clean it up a bit...it is nice!!!

She is a lady you dufus, she is not going to be using any "crapper"! :fart:

[clay]

She is a lady you dufus, she is not going to be using any "crapper"! :fart:

hmm...a "crapper" is a toilet, to me..and here everyone uses them...regardless of gender..so what is a crapper then...lol

[SugarFemme]

{{{{{{{{Clay}}}}}}}}

Dear one, you and I are in the EXACT same boat. My jaw almost hit the floor while reading your post. Seriously, I have the jitters right now!! I also go in for a colonoscopy soon...that is the next procedure I was referring to in my earlier post. I had surgery last month and a carcinoma was found connecting my ruptured appendix to my colon. This is following a hysterectomy and the removal of my ovaries and fallopian tubes (a total of three procedures/surgeries.) It has been a crazy ride since late April/early May of this year.

I am so sorry you feel alone, but PLEASE know you are not!! Even though we are a small group, we are pretty darned supportive and TOUGH and we can help carry you through if you'll let us. I am the absolute worst when it comes to asking for and accepting help...even to the point of feeling the need to leave when things get rough. But I am working on that. :)

Feel free to PM me if you want to talk more about our situations. Honestly, I feel encouraged to know we are experiencing such similar realities. Just know you can lean on us!

Jo, you got it! I just got home from an ass kicking class where I had to turn a 10 page paper, so my brain is powering down for the night. ;) But I will try to collect my thoughts and post something tomorrow!

Sadly, I am joining this group as well. Three years ago when I went for my annual pap they found a mass in my uterus. They did a biopsy and did not find cancer in the uterus but found funky stuff in the endometrium. The oncologist gave me three choices and out of the three I chose to do nothing for the present. I had already been thru 4 major surgeries and I'm tired. I'm just fucking tired. I'm a fighter. I've been thru many many a battle and always came out the victor. But now, I'm tired. I don't want to fight for a while. I want to rest. I give all of you so much credit for being such valiant warriors. You are such awesome women. It's when you quit fighting that the opportunity to lose exists. I haven't quit fighting. I just needed a break. I just want you all to know that I am ALWAYS here for you to listen to you, laugh with you, cry with you and support you. It's there for the asking.

My light and love to all of you:)

[DapperButch]

hmm...a "crapper" is a toilet, to me..and here everyone uses them...regardless of gender..so what is a crapper then...lol

Oh, it was just a joke. Maybe it is a regional thing. Around here it would be a harsh statement. Unusual to say. I was just teasing. I am trying to equate it to something so you get what I am saying. It is similar to saying something like, "I am going to go take a piss" to explain to a group that you are going to the restroom. Does that make sense?

I hope things go well today.

[Novelafemme]

Thanks for having my back, Dapper. :)

I have a terrible case of potty humor, so nothing along those lines could possibly offend me. Although, I draw the line at sharing exploding crappers. Now that's just yucky!!! ;)

Welcome OOAK. Sorry you are facing such challenges but we all need to make the decisions that feel best for us in the long run. :bunchflowers:

[Tommi]

Post Uterine Cancer~ 7 year annual work up includes the Colonoscopy OF COURSE...

In Outpatient Surgery, on a gurney talking to the next in line in on a gurney beside me, it was her first time and she was really nervous. I have had cancer, so my nervousness with her is well hidden as we are just outside the surgery suites, and I didn't want her bolting on my account... Not the time to say the C word to someone about to have this procedure.... the Anesthesiologist came by to introduce himself.

"Propofol ? " I asked, and the Anesthesiologist and I agreed that is what I wanted and was getting to "sleep" during my colonoscopy. His and My drug of choice, no hangover, no problems and it's over fast. I was next now. They wheeled me in, my Doc said "Hi, and turn on your side please" ....It WAS fast, I came to in what seemed like seconds.

My Gastroenterologist is leaning over me.

""Well, your bowel is boring. Nothing to report, and thanks for following the prep. I'll see you in 5 years, unless you want to come back sooner" HAAAHHHhhhhh

Happy Miralax to you, or whatever you need to do, and to all a good day, and night.

Alrighty then, it's not everywhere you can discuss cleansing of colons, and surgery with light heartedness~~~~ but , we are a special group.

To all those coming in to visit, to support one another, and to post I send chicken broth. Doc had me on nothing but clear liquids for 24 hours before my colonoscopy. I had to drink 64 oz. of liquid with Miralax powder, wait 4 hours then 32 oz with Miralax powder. So, I bought chicken and vegetable broth, 6 cans of each~~ I still have 5 of each... IT WAS Ghastly to just drink broth. and yes we are full of crap, as the scale told me that Miralx morning. :seeingstars:

I have gone from Endometrial Cancer Clinical Trial checkups once a week seven years ago in May, to now seeing the Oncologist once a year.

I wish you all well on this journey and the trip around the Planet, and happy bowel prep too. (f) (f)
:pile:

[clay]

OOAK.....big hugs to you!! I am in rush this am to get to hospital for my colonoscopy but will write more this evening...take that rest..we are all here for you..and undertsand..but keep the fight in the spirit!!
DAPPER: it's all good hon..promise..I DO get it and your humor! I don't sweat small stuff..seriously!
CATALINA ROSE: I would give you a super clean crapper..really and it would not be an exploding one! A brand new one...smiles....and I would love to hang out with you at Reunion?????
((((((((((((OOAK)))))))))))....hang in there my friend! We will ALL get throught this......feel the love and support from every one of us!!!
Laters folks....I heart you all..Clay

[SugarFemme]

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I'm sorry I brought my stress to the group. I was having a pain-filled night and felt like poop (No pun intended LOL). I'm usually very upbeat and the cheerleader of the group. Just couldn't summon the energy last night. Again, my apologies and love and light to all you courageous people:)

[Countyfem]

Clay BIG hug! your in my thoughts today, hope all goes well..

OOAK hugs to you! Is natural to feel down once in a while but you seem
to bounce back quickly.

Tommi so glad to read your doing well! My hopes are that you have it beat!

I do not have the big C but it does run in my genes and I have seen family members go thru the trials and tribulations that all of you here on this thread have and are going thru and I salute you for your courage and ability to keep on keeping on. You all have awesome spirit and are a true inspiration to others..

[Novelafemme]

Post Uterine Cancer~ 7 year annual work up includes the Colonoscopy OF COURSE...

In Outpatient Surgery, on a gurney talking to the next in line in on a gurney beside me, it was her first time and she was really nervous. I have had cancer, so my nervousness with her is well hidden as we are just outside the surgery suites, and I didn't want her bolting on my account... Not the time to say the C word to someone about to have this procedure.... the Anesthesiologist came by to introduce himself.

"Propofol ? " I asked, and the Anesthesiologist and I agreed that is what I wanted and was getting to "sleep" during my colonoscopy. His and My drug of choice, no hangover, no problems and it's over fast. I was next now. They wheeled me in, my Doc said "Hi, and turn on your side please" ....It WAS fast, I came to in what seemed like seconds.

My Gastroenterologist is leaning over me.

""Well, your bowel is boring. Nothing to report, and thanks for following the prep. I'll see you in 5 years, unless you want to come back sooner" HAAAHHHhhhhh

Happy Miralax to you, or whatever you need to do, and to all a good day, and night.

Alrighty then, it's not everywhere you can discuss cleansing of colons, and surgery with light heartedness~~~~ but , we are a special group.

To all those coming in to visit, to support one another, and to post I send chicken broth. Doc had me on nothing but clear liquids for 24 hours before my colonoscopy. I had to drink 64 oz. of liquid with Miralax powder, wait 4 hours then 32 oz with Miralax powder. So, I bought chicken and vegetable broth, 6 cans of each~~ I still have 5 of each... IT WAS Ghastly to just drink broth. and yes we are full of crap, as the scale told me that Miralx morning. :seeingstars:

I have gone from Endometrial Cancer Clinical Trial checkups once a week seven years ago in May, to now seeing the Oncologist once a year.

I wish you all well on this journey and the trip around the Planet, and happy bowel prep too. (f) (f)
:pile:

Good luck today, Clay! Please post when you can!

OOAK, no need to apologize! We are only human and some days we just feel like shit (pun intended!) ;) Hang in there, love! :)


Tommi, you are such an inspiration! I love reading your posts. :)

I have my Rx on the fridge at home but I don't think it's for Miralax. All I know is the powder has to be mixed with a gallon of water and drunk over the course of six hours. ACK!! And then nothing but clear liquid and absolutely nothing red in color. I'm supposed to drink extra fluids since I'm on the small size and they don't want me to get dehydrated.

I opted to do twilight sleep since I loathe the way I feel coming out of anesthesia. The last few times I have woken up almost near tears. It just has a weird effect on me. I was emailing with my aunt this morning and she told me she is allergic to the Demerol/Versed combination they typically use for twilight sleep...so now I don't know what to do since the location I go to is based on what type of anesthesia you opt for. My last two hospital stays I have had Morphine post surgery and while it did make me itchy, I didn't have any negative reaction to it.

I also have a hysterectomy question for those who've gone through the procedure. I continue to have mild bleeding and lots of mild pulling and jabs of pain where my uterus once was...well, and ovaries, too. My doctor said it could be from scar tissue forming but I'm wondering what others' experiences might be...especially with the bleeding/spotting. It always happens out of the blue!

[DapperButch]

Post Uterine Cancer~ 7 year annual work up includes the Colonoscopy OF COURSE...

In Outpatient Surgery, on a gurney talking to the next in line in on a gurney beside me, it was her first time and she was really nervous. I have had cancer, so my nervousness with her is well hidden as we are just outside the surgery suites, and I didn't want her bolting on my account... Not the time to say the C word to someone about to have this procedure.... the Anesthesiologist came by to introduce himself.

"Propofol ? " I asked, and the Anesthesiologist and I agreed that is what I wanted and was getting to "sleep" during my colonoscopy. His and My drug of choice, no hangover, no problems and it's over fast. I was next now. They wheeled me in, my Doc said "Hi, and turn on your side please" ....It WAS fast, I came to in what seemed like seconds.

My Gastroenterologist is leaning over me.

""Well, your bowel is boring. Nothing to report, and thanks for following the prep. I'll see you in 5 years, unless you want to come back sooner" HAAAHHHhhhhh

Happy Miralax to you, or whatever you need to do, and to all a good day, and night.

Alrighty then, it's not everywhere you can discuss cleansing of colons, and surgery with light heartedness~~~~ but , we are a special group.

To all those coming in to visit, to support one another, and to post I send chicken broth. Doc had me on nothing but clear liquids for 24 hours before my colonoscopy. I had to drink 64 oz. of liquid with Miralax powder, wait 4 hours then 32 oz with Miralax powder. So, I bought chicken and vegetable broth, 6 cans of each~~ I still have 5 of each... IT WAS Ghastly to just drink broth. and yes we are full of crap, as the scale told me that Miralx morning. :seeingstars:

I have gone from Endometrial Cancer Clinical Trial checkups once a week seven years ago in May, to now seeing the Oncologist once a year.

I wish you all well on this journey and the trip around the Planet, and happy bowel prep too. (f) (f)
:pile:

Wow, Tommi. I remember last year's colonoscopy (yours). Time sure does fly! Congrats on another clean bill of health! I'm gonna be just like you when I grow up! :) It is good for us to hear these positive stories!

[SugarFemme]

http://th97.photobucket.com/albums/l230/big_corona/animated%20gifs/th_beeab613.gif


Thought this was appropriate given the colonoscopy discussions LOL

[clay]

(((((((((CountyFem)))))))))))...thanks so much for your kind words, hugs, and support...that is so comforting....Clay
(((((((((((((((((OOAK))))))))))))))) you have no need to apologize...it's only human to have off days...and you are entitled...we all have those moments! Take care...
CatalinaRose (I always want to say Caitlin instead of Catalina..don't know why...:)....).....I sent you a message on your user reps...check it pls...
I had propafol....brand name is Diprovan..and is called by nurses "milk of amnesia"...super safe, wears off quickly with no ill effects....works quick, wears off quick...YOU will do fine.....and we are all here for you...and will be with you in spirit! You most likely have the prep HalfLytely....comes in half gallon jug, ya mix with water to the fill line on it.....comes with a Dulcolax 5mg tablet you take first...then begin the 8 oz of HalfLytely followed with 8 oz. water..til the stuff is all gone..then do two glasses of water..then NPO (nothing by mouth) after MN....til after test....a really good idea, to be sure one is super clean in GI tract is to do clear liquids for the two days before test...the day before test and day of test....Jus' sayin'....smiles
TOMMI: CONGRATS, buddy!!! You so rock! Keep up that fighting spiirt...and I, for one, know you def. move me to fight, too!!!
I will be back later to post....I have an ortho appt in a while...I heart you all!!! Clay

[DapperButch]

Clay-
Is it fair to say that the colonoscopy was clear, then?

[clay]

Clay-
Is it fair to say that the colonoscopy was clear, then?

Hey D.B. I will be back online in a little while to post...thanks for checking on me....hearts...Clay

[clay]

Hey all you brave warriors!!! I wrote out a post last night..computer froze up for some reason..and I lost it..by then I was frustrated, tired, more like exhausted, so I said fu get about it..lol.
So I am up really early...for me..and decided to leave a note...I appreciate each and every one fo you..and I know that you each deal with your own battles daily...so I am in awesome company...:).
I had the endoscopy...and will have to have another..after I get a CT Scan of abd/pelvis this am...with and without contrast....and will know more when we get the results of this. I am seeing my oncologist the first time in the am..and I will REALLY have to be up way earlier than this..I have to leave my home at 515am, drive to the friend who is driving me to appt..and travel another hr and a half to get to oncologist's office...but it's is all good....smiles...
The endoscopy did reveal a mass in the bowel someplace..and he wasn't able to proceed further....so a metal clip was attached to it, the mass was "tattooed" with blue ink...and this is two fold...1..make it more visible on CT Scan and show where it is exactly in gut, and 2. when he does a repeat endoscopy, he will know he has already seen this one..and to help distinguish from any new stuff that I know he WON'T find....smiles....I am tired this am..slept about 4 hrs...but I will get a nap in this afternoon..yummm..love a late afternoon nap!
I am in a good mind space...and I am going to fight this, just a lil hitch in my giddy up..and something I WILL overcome.
I am sorry I didn't post yesterday...I know you all were waiting to hear...I did try and got tired with computer acting up...lol..so...anyway I am off to get nuclear'ed...as I say..when I do get with someone..she won't have any trouble finding me..I will be the one glowing in the dark!!!....and I so hope it won't be Neon Pink...lol...chartreuse I am guessing..would that qualify me as a shrek??? Cool...now to find "my" Fiona!!!! I heart you all...have a most awesome day..I am..
ETA: I fell off the curb the am of my endoscopy, and have a nasty 4 inch gash on my left elbow...unable to be sutured as skin is ripped and shredded....and had to go on to scan with a bloody, ripped open elbow..I cleaned it in bathroom at hospital with soap and water and surg, nurse irrigated wound with saline..and dressed it..talk about sore...anyway it is still sore but will be fine. I did get a cortisone shot in my achey left knee yesterday...so is feeling better this am..yea, I am a "mess" BUT I am a worthy mess..and I am tough!!! smiles...

[DapperButch]

I had the endoscopy...and will have to have another..after I get a CT Scan of abd/pelvis this am...with and without contrast....and will know more when we get the results of this.

SNIP

The endoscopy did reveal a mass in the bowel someplace..and he wasn't able to proceed further....so a metal clip was attached to it, the mass was "tattooed" with blue ink...and this is two fold...1..make it more visible on CT Scan and show where it is exactly in gut, and 2. when he does a repeat endoscopy, he will know he has already seen this one..

Thanks for the update, Clay. I am sorry that they found a mass, but it sounds as though you are in positive spirits about it...feeling strong, knowing you can fight it.

Hang in there.

Also, no worries about posting. Just update whenever you want to, or can. We all have different processes with all of this.

[Tommi]

Congratulations on doing the big things.
claybaby. http://mysistersjar.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/colonoscopy11.jpg

Glad you went through with it, and YOU ARE doing the follow through stuff.

So, you don't need that stuff hanging around in there, and you are seeing specialists that will take care of it.

Yes Dapper, time flies .I think the Planet is spinning faster and we just don't know it. This thread gets it.

[KimbaYLRF]

Hi all, I am new here and saw this thread. Thanks for whoever started it.

Two years ago in March we lost my dad to a rare form of kidney cancer. My mom's cousin was there one day a week to help, my daughter was there one day a week to help, my younger sister and I were there two days a week each. My mom was working so there was no doubt that since he was home with Hospice we would be there so she could still work. I was there Thurs. evenings and Saturdays.

My mom was with my dad everyday after work. She slept on the couch so if he needed anything at night or had to get to the bathroom she could help him. He had a hospital bed in the living room. She never once babied him, just talked to him as she normally would. They were close but his last few months brought them closer.

My dad hated to "bother" us as he would say. One day after having to clean him after he had an accident on the way to the toilet, he kept apologizing to me because I had to do that for him. I told him he did for us when we couldn't do for ourselves, now it is our turn to help him. We do what we do for you because we love you. My dad cried that day. It was the first time I ever saw my dad cry. It was maybe three weeks before he died.

Not once did my dad complain about his pain, he was always upbeat and also fun when he was on his pain meds...LMAO We had so many laughs with him.

My dad died with dignity. He was my hero. The only regret I have is not telling him the things I wanted to. He did know I loved him and appreciated him.

[Tommi]

http://www.mountcarmelblessedsacrament.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11/flowers-150x136.jpg

Thanks for stopping by KimbaYLRF.

What a great post about love and support. I am so glad you were able to spend time with him during his illness. I know even if we don't get to say all the things we want to, our loved ones know from our eyes and our hearts, how very much they mean to us, and that we will miss them sooo. (f)

[deb_U_taunt]

I am a great hand holder. I am also really great at inappropriate jokes in times of stress. lol

You ARE going to be okay, WE care about you, and WE are on your side! Oh, and we will send Debby over to hold your hand!

Number one order of business....report back to us on the 11th. Not the 12th, the 11th!

I hope you have someone who can go with you on the 11th. Two sets of ears are better than one. Write your questions down before you go, even if you don't think that you could possibly forget any of your questions. Take notes.

And also....sorry about the prep you are going through tonight!
:blowingitup: (hoping to make you smile)

[deb_U_taunt]

Next reunion? I would LOVE to hug each and every one of you!

OOAK.....big hugs to you!! I am in rush this am to get to hospital for my colonoscopy but will write more this evening...take that rest..we are all here for you..and undertsand..but keep the fight in the spirit!!
DAPPER: it's all good hon..promise..I DO get it and your humor! I don't sweat small stuff..seriously!
CATALINA ROSE: I would give you a super clean crapper..really and it would not be an exploding one! A brand new one...smiles....and I would love to hang out with you at Reunion?????
((((((((((((OOAK)))))))))))....hang in there my friend! We will ALL get throught this......feel the love and support from every one of us!!!
Laters folks....I heart you all..Clay

[deb_U_taunt]

We all have those days. There were times I would lay in bed with my face to the wall wanting it all to stop. It is healthier to be honest, than to hide behind false cheer and bravato.

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I'm sorry I brought my stress to the group. I was having a pain-filled night and felt like poop (No pun intended LOL). I'm usually very upbeat and the cheerleader of the group. Just couldn't summon the energy last night. Again, my apologies and love and light to all you courageous people:)

[deb_U_taunt]

I am off sleeping for a couple weeks and this thread gets busy. Sorry, to hear the reasons it is. We are troopers, though. If any of you need/want to talk, PM me and I will be happy to give you my cell.

Update: I only have one more week of radiation left. YEEHAW

[SugarFemme]

Gawd, I wish there was a way that we could all get together to laugh, cry, dance, hold hands and just be together. I know we could all benefit from it. Keep each other in the light.


http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQH19Zrvbf1Yllov4WNKiwR3ae8zBknk GWzpOeLpHYminYmAvqlKg

[SugarFemme]

http://randomthoughtsonlifeblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/courage.jpg

[clay]

Evening all my brave Warrior buddies!!! I came to post a brief update..I am exhausted, to say the least. I have been through the wringer the last 3 weeks..and esp. this one..
The colonospcopy did reveal a mass...he wasn't able to tell me where or what size...and wasn't able to go on with endoscopy...so a biopsy was done. I got the results yesterday afternoon..it is an invasive malignancy...and I am scheduled to see a Surgical Gastro Oncologist next Tuesday, and I will have a CT scan of Chest..to rule out any mets there. The mass is in the transverse colon..and explains the dull, achy, nagging discomfort to the right lower flank area the last 16 months....so I don't know much else til I see him next week....sorry! My appt today with the Gynecological oncologist went well...she is deferring the hysto until I see the gastro onc. and they confer as to right course of treatment to handle both areas of cancer. She is giving me an excellent prognosis and feels she can eradicate the uterine ca with vag hysto with tubes and ovaries..lymph are in limbo at moment...and is hopeful the two specialties can do simultaneous surgeries and only one anesthesia...so I am hopeful....she is also hopeful there is not any other ca elsewhere and both can use the Da Vinci robotic arm for the surgeries...and I will have a hernia repair from my open lap chole last year (open Gallbladder surg)....either way I am going to dig my heels in and fight this darn stuff. I am numb tonight..I cried most of last..and just wanted to post something..as you all have been so loving and supportive and I appreciate each and every one...I am just tired, emotionally drained, and unable to write more...please know I think everyone of you are so incredible..and I heart you all...take care..and debby I may take you up on that offer...I have some amazing folks...and I so love them...night and sorry if I am rambling..I just can't go on any more tonight..mind is on overload...just wannna own this right now, mull it, and spend some quiet and alone time...I know each of you understand...love Clay Glow worm

[clay]

Tonight, all I want is a loving body to lie down by me, to hold me, to soothe my weary body..and to tell me this will be okay, to tell me how she loves me, and will walk this path with me...just a soft, sweet, and comforting body...to make me feel her love...and comfort me..where are you? I so need you...tonight..for a couple of nights..let my body be wrapped in yours...please?

[Tommi]

http://www.georgiagoldengirls.org/heal.jpg

Good morning everyone. Sending hugs to all that come and go and an extra one to clay who needs a hand, huuuuuggggs 2 OneOfAKind, Cat, Debby and allll
:moonstars:

I am fighting my way out of a funk this AM, so, what do ya do.Come here and post, write it out I spose........
My friend Milana passed away Thursday. She had been in a nursing home since August 2010, and was doing okay. I had this phone message from Cres, her brother-in-law when I got home from work. "Tommi, Milana passed away quickly this afternoon. She had gone to take a shower, got back to her room, and began to throw up blood, and hemorrhaged. When the nurse came to tell us , the paramedics were already there and took her to the Emergency hospital, and they said she had a cardiac arrest. It was fast.Just wanted to let you know in case you were coming to visit Sat."

I was with my buddy when she was diagnosed with esophageal cancer June-2010. It was too late to operate when found. Told the chemo and radiation were palliative and would help keep the mass in her throat smaller. Her family never accepted that she was gay, and had shunned her for 20 years, but rallied round, and made peace with her when she got sick.

She was a valiant fighter for 16 months, with a trach tube and unable to talk. She thought it was a hiatal hernia because she was having trouble swallowing for a year or more before going to the right doctor. After Placement of a feeding tube, she had to have a trach tube because she couldn't come out of the anesthesia in July 2010. After that, she never came home again. She went from acute care, to sub-acute nursing home. She went through chemo and radiation

She was a great Wii bowler and won at all the games and did great crafts in the nursing home.

To those who feel yucky, or that something just isn't right in your body and being, seek a doctor that gets it. Many times we are just written off by busy and/or incompetent doctors. I can tell you I have fired many of the Doc's I went to. I fired the specialist that didn't want to do a thorough work up, and other scans and tests on me when I was diagnosed with Uterine cancer and prior to a radical total hysterctomy,tubes, ovaries and 16 lymph nodes. An ultrasound had shown my one kidney was twice the size of the other, and she was just "going to have a kidney surgeon on standby, just in case"...no, but hell no. I wanted an MRI, cat scan, IVP, etc. BEFORE the opened me up. She said, " Oh well we will see what kind of cancer it is and go from there..:

I said, :NO,,, we won't" and fired her..I went to a cancer gynecologist who ran all of the cancer screening tests PRIOR to surgery,
okay, I have talked enough. Tiggergirl wants Daddy to hold her cuz it's her turn for attention. (f)
bye computer peeeps(f)

[Novelafemme]

{{{{Tommi}}}}} My condolences on the loss of your friend, Milana. She'll be kicking butt at wii bowling in the clouds. :)

{{{{Clay}}}} I will try to give you a call today. I'm not a huge phone person, but I know how it feels to need a reassuring voice every now and again. Be loving to yourself right now, dear one.

So good to see you, Debby!

Back later with more. :)

[deb_U_taunt]

I so understand this feeling. Even though a friend came to stay during chemo, I have never felt so alone. The dog, as much as she loves me, just doesn't cut it.

Tonight, all I want is a loving body to lie down by me, to hold me, to soothe my weary body..and to tell me this will be okay, to tell me how she loves me, and will walk this path with me...just a soft, sweet, and comforting body...to make me feel her love...and comfort me..where are you? I so need you...tonight..for a couple of nights..let my body be wrapped in yours...please?

[Spirit Dancer]

Tommi
For Milana and for you the one who stood by giving care and asking nothing in return, keeping you close in thought.
For those who are still fighting keep hope, i do even when days are dark hope remains.
http://i663.photobucket.com/albums/uu353/stella000121/burningcandle.gif



http://www.georgiagoldengirls.org/heal.jpg

Good morning everyone. Sending hugs to all that come and go and an extra one to clay who needs a hand, huuuuuggggs 2 OneOfAKind, Cat, Debby and allll
:moonstars:

I am fighting my way out of a funk this AM, so, what do ya do.Come here and post, write it out I spose........
My friend Milana passed away Thursday. She had been in a nursing home since August 2010, and was doing okay. I had this phone message from Cres, her brother-in-law when I got home from work. "Tommi, Milana passed away quickly this afternoon. She had gone to take a shower, got back to her room, and began to throw up blood, and hemorrhaged. When the nurse came to tell us , the paramedics were already there and took her to the Emergency hospital, and they said she had a cardiac arrest. It was fast.Just wanted to let you know in case you were coming to visit Sat."

I was with my buddy when she was diagnosed with esophageal cancer June-2010. It was too late to operate when found. Told the chemo and radiation were palliative and would help keep the mass in her throat smaller. Her family never accepted that she was gay, and had shunned her for 20 years, but rallied round, and made peace with her when she got sick.

She was a valiant fighter for 16 months, with a trach tube and unable to talk. She thought it was a hiatal hernia because she was having trouble swallowing for a year or more before going to the right doctor. After Placement of a feeding tube, she had to have a trach tube because she couldn't come out of the anesthesia in July 2010. After that, she never came home again. She went from acute care, to sub-acute nursing home. She went through chemo and radiation

She was a great Wii bowler and won at all the games and did great crafts in the nursing home.

To those who feel yucky, or that something just isn't right in your body and being, seek a doctor that gets it. Many times we are just written off by busy and/or incompetent doctors. I can tell you I have fired many of the Doc's I went to. I fired the specialist that didn't want to do a thorough work up, and other scans and tests on me when I was diagnosed with Uterine cancer and prior to a radical total hysterctomy,tubes, ovaries and 16 lymph nodes. An ultrasound had shown my one kidney was twice the size of the other, and she was just "going to have a kidney surgeon on standby, just in case"...no, but hell no. I wanted an MRI, cat scan, IVP, etc. BEFORE the opened me up. She said, " Oh well we will see what kind of cancer it is and go from there..:

I said, :NO,,, we won't" and fired her..I went to a cancer gynecologist who ran all of the cancer screening tests PRIOR to surgery,
okay, I have talked enough. Tiggergirl wants Daddy to hold her cuz it's her turn for attention. (f)
bye computer peeeps(f)

[clay]

(((((((((((((((((Tommi))))))))))))))))...my deepest condolences, my friend! Yes, Milana is kicking butt on Wii Bowling in the clouds now..hold onto the memories you two shared..she is with you..in your heart, my friend! Take care..know we walk with you...in spirit...Clay
To Debby, CatalinaRose, OOAK, Debby, Dapper, and all the other bravest of Warriors...I send each a big hug..and love you all...we will continue to hold one another, walk the path we are on, and be lovingly supportive..always...I heart you all..Clay

[JustJo]

I am having an extended WTF moment today...

I have been calling my mother every day since I was there to see her...checking on how she is, pushing for the docs to do whatever it is they need to do so that she can come here.

She's had good days, and bad days, but in all of it I've had the enduring sense that she's not being completely honest with me. I'm not surprised by this...it's the status quo....but it's unnerving just the same.

Anyway...last week I was at a seminar for 4 days....calling her as usual.
Yesterday...traveling home, I tried calling a couple times...no answer, and no answering machine.
Today...a couple times...no answer, no answering machine.

This is what she did when this all first came to light, and she informed us of her cancer with a note in the mail.

It may be nothing more than a broken answering machine, but I doubt it. And I'm trying to reach friends (without starting a panic), and waiting for the other shoe to fall.

I'm completely convinced that she's unplugged the machine and isn't answering the phone...and I'm wondering why.

[SugarFemme]

(((((((((((((Tommi))))))))))))) I am sorry for your loss. I can only imagine your feelings and sadness. In the Jewish tradition we tear our coat collar when someone passes away as physical proof that we will never be whole when a loved one dies. I always thought it a strange and archaic tradition, but as I have grown older it makes total sense to me. I wish you the best Tommi.

[clay]

OOAK:
I think that would be just awesome. I know I could use every thing you mentioned...blow bubbles, color in a book, laugh, and just console..yes..we should...let's....smilesGawd, I wish there was a way that we could all get together to laugh, cry, dance, hold hands and just be together. I know we could all benefit from it. Keep each other in the light.


http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQH19Zrvbf1Yllov4WNKiwR3ae8zBknk GWzpOeLpHYminYmAvqlKg

[clay]

OOAK:
You take that rest....do what YOU feel is right for yourself..and know we are here for YOU as well..please feel free to PM me..anytime....I can understand tired..and needing a "break" just don't let go of the "fight" in you...know we are here...right beside you..with a hand up, a hnad out (stretched), or a hug...it is yours..for asking...I walk in the light and journey...right along side you...as do the rest of us...hugs...Clay Glo Worm

[KimbaYLRF]

I am so sorry for everyone who is experiencing loss and cancer diagnosis right now. I wish there was a way I could help everyone

[JustJo]

I did finally hear from my mother. I also still have the feeling that she's not being honest.

She's stalling on coming to Florida now...making excuses about appointments and things that can either be done here (for her) or taken care of at her house by friends.

Either she's worse and doesn't want to say anything.

Or she's feeling quite a bit better and I am once again disposable.

:seeingstars:

[clay]

1OAK....I LOVE that image...it is so warming, so captivating, and gives me such a warm, comfy feeling..thanks for sharing that with us....


http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQH19Zrvbf1Yllov4WNKiwR3ae8zBknk GWzpOeLpHYminYmAvqlKg[/QUOTE]

[Novelafemme]

{{{{Jo}}}} I apologize in advance if this is none of my business, but since I am going through a similar situation with my father perhaps we can commiserate.

I finally realized after this last go around with my dad that I can't make him share with my siblings and I that which he himself cannot even come to terms with. I feel like I have been chasing him around the block since my mom died nearly three years ago and to be quite frank, I'm tired of it. Since I was a little girl I have had my dad on a pedestal I'm not all together sure he is deserved of, and I'm just now...at the age of 38...coming to this realization.

So, my decision is/was to not feed into his BS. I can love him to the moon and back and hope for the best but after all is said and done I can't make him better nor can I make him change his behavior or the way he fundamentally is as a human being. And I have finally come to a place of peace in my heart about this. Well, I still get teary at times over it all, but I have done all I can do and I know how bad it feels to bend over backwards for him and then get this passive/aggressive, shoulder-shrug response.

Hang in there! Are you still coming to AZ soon? xoxo

[JustJo]

{{{{Jo}}}} I apologize in advance if this is none of my business, but since I am going through a similar situation with my father perhaps we can commiserate.

I finally realized after this last go around with my dad that I can't make him share with my siblings and I that which he himself cannot even come to terms with. I feel like I have been chasing him around the block since my mom died nearly three years ago and to be quite frank, I'm tired of it. Since I was a little girl I have had my dad on a pedestal I'm not all together sure he is deserved of, and I'm just now...at the age of 38...coming to this realization.

So, my decision is/was to not feed into his BS. I can love him to the moon and back and hope for the best but after all is said and done I can't make him better nor can I make him change his behavior or the way he fundamentally is as a human being. And I have finally come to a place of peace in my heart about this. Well, I still get teary at times over it all, but I have done all I can do and I know how bad it feels to bend over backwards for him and then get this passive/aggressive, shoulder-shrug response.

Hang in there! Are you still coming to AZ soon? xoxo

Thank you so much...and you're absolutely right. I'm just going to need to come to grips with the fact that this is how she is...and cancer doesn't change any of that, of course.

And, yes, I'm here now....just arrived late this afternoon, and just sent you a PM (great minds think alike :) ). I'm only here a few days, leaving early Thursday morning.

[deb_U_taunt]

Tired and feeling whiney today. Part of my tit and armpit is the color of charcoal and blistered. Questioning why I have to go through this if the plan is to take them off anyway.

[mustangjeano]

Hey , got ahead and have a whiney day--this is a long tuff journey and you are doing stupendously.
I am also confused about your sequence of treatment. My breast cancer was a very agressive type and was pretty advanced so I had 4 mo. of chemo, the mastectomies and then radiation treatment last. When I started getting burned I asked the radiation Dr. what to use on it. He gave me some special creme(can't remember what it was) and it did help with the pain and dryness. Have you asked your Dr. what to use?
Sending loving energy your way.
Jeano

[deb_U_taunt]

Hi Jeano and thank you,

The chain of events:
diagnosed in April - tumor 8cm, grade 3, stage 2b and triple negative
surgery May 2nd - took almost half of my right breast (whine) and lymph nodes (which are clear yeehaw!)
started chemo June 24th - every two weeks, 4 A/C and then 4 Taxol - A/C I didn't have too many side effects from, but the Taxol kicked my ass
3 weeks after chemo, I started radiation and talk to the Dr about next surgery steps Nov 22nd.

The Dr said the radiation burns can get worse with bigger breasts. I wish I would/could have gotten the mastectomy first. It is under my breast and my armpit that is the worst. Dr gave my aquaphor, but working and having to wear a bra and it aggravates it. :(

Sorry to hear you had to go through this, too. I keep reminding myself this is only temporary. Most days, my attitude is good, but yesterday I was whiney and boohooy.

Hugs to all of you, you have all been so supportive.

Debby

Hey , got ahead and have a whiney day--this is a long tuff journey and you are doing stupendously.
I am also confused about your sequence of treatment. My breast cancer was a very agressive type and was pretty advanced so I had 4 mo. of chemo, the mastectomies and then radiation treatment last. When I started getting burned I asked the radiation Dr. what to use on it. He gave me some special creme(can't remember what it was) and it did help with the pain and dryness. Have you asked your Dr. what to use?
Sending loving energy your way.
Jeano

[deb_U_taunt]

Hey everyone. Clay doesn't have internet access, for now. Our glow worm is going in for a repeat colonoscopy next week and she will be having a bowel resection, which hasn't been scheduled yet.

side note:
If anyone is in the same area or knows someone that is, when Clay has surgery, she needs a dog sitter for a week or so.

[Novelafemme]

{{{Clay}}} Keeping you in my thoughts!!! Wish I was closer to pup sit!

Debby, you can complain as much as you like! I think once someone has gone through the big C, they have free range on the grouchy field! ;)

[Countyfem]

Hey everyone. Clay doesn't have internet access, for now. Our glow worm is going in for a repeat colonoscopy next week and she will be having a bowel resection, which hasn't been scheduled yet.

side note:
If anyone is in the same area or knows someone that is, when Clay has surgery, she needs a dog sitter for a week or so.



I spoke to Clay, I'll be going down when her date is set, she says to thank all of you for your thoughts and well wishes

[deb_U_taunt]

I spoke to Clay, I'll be going down when her date is set, she says to thank all of you for your thoughts and well wishes

Countyfem...you are wonderful! Give clay hugs and keep us updated please. :)

[deb_U_taunt]

Not only whiney, but been tearing up easy. I am almost done, so WTF is that all about. :(

{{{Clay}}} Keeping you in my thoughts!!! Wish I was closer to pup sit!

Debby, you can complain as much as you like! I think once someone has gone through the big C, they have free range on the grouchy field! ;)

[DapperButch]

Not only whiney, but been tearing up easy. I am almost done, so WTF is that all about. :(

I was all funky, depressed, and anxious for several months AFTER I finished all of my treatment.

Without going on a long ramble, the thought is that a person can sort of feel adrift after treatment is done. A "what now?" kind of thing. Here they had this major life and death crisis and then their oncologist says, "Ok, you are good to go. Go back to your regular life now. If you get cancer again, we will treat it. See you in 3 months!".

:|

What I did was go here http://www.blockmd.com/ and got blood work done. Got on supplements and started eating as close to vegan as I could tolerate. It makes me feel more in control of my destiny. Is it bullshit? I don't know, but it helps decrease the anxiety about a recurrence.

[DapperButch]

Hey, everyone.

My partner's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. We don't know a whole lot besides the tumor is behind her nipple and in a lymph node in her arm pit (I think I said that correctly).

tantalizingfemme is flying out on Saturday to be with her mom for the surgery on Monday. She plans to stay for 8 days.

Please keep her and her mother in your thoughts and prayers.

And Debby, you may be getting lots of questions from me in the future!


Hi Jeano and thank you,

The chain of events:
diagnosed in April - tumor 8cm, grade 3, stage 2b and triple negative
surgery May 2nd - took almost half of my right breast (whine) and lymph nodes (which are clear yeehaw!)
started chemo June 24th - every two weeks, 4 A/C and then 4 Taxol - A/C I didn't have too many side effects from, but the Taxol kicked my ass
3 weeks after chemo, I started radiation and talk to the Dr about next surgery steps Nov 22nd.

The Dr said the radiation burns can get worse with bigger breasts. I wish I would/could have gotten the mastectomy first. It is under my breast and my armpit that is the worst. Dr gave my aquaphor, but working and having to wear a bra and it aggravates it. :(

Sorry to hear you had to go through this, too. I keep reminding myself this is only temporary. Most days, my attitude is good, but yesterday I was whiney and boohooy.

Hugs to all of you, you have all been so supportive.

Debby

[mustangjeano]

Dapper, sending healing thoughts and prayers to your Mom-in-law and your partner.
Clay, prayers going out to you.
Countyfemme--you rock!
Debbi, Yep , part of this wild ride is the dang "chemo brain" which can include depression, anxiety, memory loss..... most of it gets better with time but don't hesitate to get help if you want to. And it is like you wrote, you gear up for this fight and then the treatments are done--you have survived the process and then what? Seek out people and things that give you joy.
I am so grateful for this thread and the amazing people who share themselves on here.
Jeano

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

I spoke to Clay, I'll be going down when her date is set, she says to thank all of you for your thoughts and well wishes

Countyfem, thank you so much for your caring!! Hugs to you AND to Clay!

[deb_U_taunt]

Working on the diet changes. I bookmarked the page and will take a look tomorrow. I have a big fear of having to do this again.
Glad to know this is all normal. :)

I was all funky, depressed, and anxious for several months AFTER I finished all of my treatment.

Without going on a long ramble, the thought is that a person can sort of feel adrift after treatment is done. A "what now?" kind of thing. Here they had this major life and death crisis and then their oncologist says, "Ok, you are good to go. Go back to your regular life now. If you get cancer again, we will treat it. See you in 3 months!".

:|

What I did was go here http://www.blockmd.com/ and got blood work done. Got on supplements and started eating as close to vegan as I could tolerate. It makes me feel more in control of my destiny. Is it bullshit? I don't know, but it helps decrease the anxiety about a recurrence.

[deb_U_taunt]

And Jeano for a resource. :)
So sorry to hear this, I will keep you all in my thoughts Monday.
On a positive note, the recovery from breast cancer is good.

Hugs, Debby

Hey, everyone.

My partner's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. We don't know a whole lot besides the tumor is behind her nipple and in a lymph node in her arm pit (I think I said that correctly).

tantalizingfemme is flying out on Saturday to be with her mom for the surgery on Monday. She plans to stay for 8 days.

Please keep her and her mother in your thoughts and prayers.

And Debby, you may be getting lots of questions from me in the future!

[deb_U_taunt]

Jeano,

When I feel up to it, I have been going to a cancer support group. It has helped a lot. My memory has improved quite a bit, it was really comical there for a while. :)
How long have you been in recovery? How are you doing now?

Hugs, Debby

Dapper, sending healing thoughts and prayers to your Mom-in-law and your partner.
Clay, prayers going out to you.
Countyfemme--you rock!
Debbi, Yep , part of this wild ride is the dang "chemo brain" which can include depression, anxiety, memory loss..... most of it gets better with time but don't hesitate to get help if you want to. And it is like you wrote, you gear up for this fight and then the treatments are done--you have survived the process and then what? Seek out people and things that give you joy.
I am so grateful for this thread and the amazing people who share themselves on here.
Jeano

[mustangjeano]

Jeano,

When I feel up to it, I have been going to a cancer support group. It has helped a lot. My memory has improved quite a bit, it was really comical there for a while. :)
How long have you been in recovery? How are you doing now?

Hugs, Debby

I am glad your memory is much better. I "milked" the chemo memory thing for at least a year---but can't really blame it on that anymore--I am almost 7 years past breast cancer. lol I'm doing very well. I just retired and am staying busy working on projects around my little ranch. Thanks for asking.
Jeano

[deb_U_taunt]

Gives me lots of hope every time I hear someone is years without a recurrence.

I am glad your memory is much better. I "milked" the chemo memory thing for at least a year---but can't really blame it on that anymore--I am almost 7 years past breast cancer. lol I'm doing very well. I just retired and am staying busy working on projects around my little ranch. Thanks for asking.
Jeano

[Novelafemme]

I'm gonna pick up my yummy gallon drink on the way home from work today. My procedure is at 9am'ish Monday...wish me luck!

[Tommi]

I'm gonna pick up my yummy gallon drink on the way home from work today. My procedure is at 9am'ish Monday...wish me luck!

Oh absolutely. Wonderful way to spend Sunday. That yummy stuff, goes down hard comes out easy. :goodluck: with this adventure. :clover::clover::clover:

:pile:

[deb_U_taunt]

Wishing you lots and lots of luck!

I'm gonna pick up my yummy gallon drink on the way home from work today. My procedure is at 9am'ish Monday...wish me luck!

[deb_U_taunt]

The good news is, her system will be all clear for Thanksgiving feasting, now. lol


Oh absolutely. Wonderful way to spend Sunday. That yummy stuff, goes down hard comes out easy. :goodluck: with this adventure. :clover::clover::clover:

:pile:

[Novelafemme]

well now...wasn't that just gobs of fun!! so, my goal was to begin at noon and see what happened. WHOOOOOEEEYYYYY!! i finished the gallon by 1:30 and just want to add that it is MUCH easier to drink with the flavoring in it. the pharmacist recommended that i try it without any flavor first and that was simply not doable. a couple funny things to mention: it moves so quickly that i drank it ice cold and it came out ice cold. ;) and i think that is physically the coldest i have ever been...and i''m from BUFFALO!!

now, i am waddling around the house, hungry and ready to do this thing!!

[Novelafemme]

Colonoscopy...CHECK! Lots of polyps removed, pathology back by Friday. Slept loads, got the girls packed for their trip to San Diego and now I'm ready for bed. Love and hugs to all :)

[Tommi]

well now...wasn't that just gobs of fun!! so, my goal was to begin at noon and see what happened. WHOOOOOEEEYYYYY!! i finished the gallon by 1:30 and just want to add that it is MUCH easier to drink with the flavoring in it. the pharmacist recommended that i try it without any flavor first and that was simply not doable. a couple funny things to mention: it moves so quickly that i drank it ice cold and it came out ice cold. ;) and i think that is physically the coldest i have ever been...and i''m from BUFFALO!!

now, i am waddling around the house, hungry and ready to do this thing!!

Colonoscopy...CHECK! Lots of polyps removed, pathology back by Friday. Slept loads, got the girls packed for their trip to San Diego and now I'm ready for bed. Love and hugs to all :)

Well, I know you are glad that is all over with, and you got some sleep after "waddling around the house". girls heading to San Diego for the holiday!!! So Calif...rain expected Thursday. My trees and lawn are all happy after the rain this past week. Really they are. No..really.. :)

[Novelafemme]

We've been having a ton of rain here in AZ, too, Tommi! And I would be lying if I said I wasn't loving every second of it!

I am wonderfully happy that experience is all over. Although, it wasn't nearly as bad as I expected it to be. The nurses were all so wonderful and kind. The only negative was that I had asked a couple of times who all would be in the room during the procedure and both times was assured that there would be only two female nurses and my doctor (who is also a woman)...and as they were injecting the sleepy drugs into my IV, in walks a man. :( I remember feeling a bit shaky but then the drugs kicked in and off to sleep land I went.

[Tommi]

We've been having a ton of rain here in AZ, too, Tommi! And I would be lying if I said I wasn't loving every second of it!

I am wonderfully happy that experience is all over. Although, it wasn't nearly as bad as I expected it to be. The nurses were all so wonderful and kind. The only negative was that I had asked a couple of times who all would be in the room during the procedure and both times was assured that there would be only two female nurses and my doctor (who is also a woman)...and as they were injecting the sleepy drugs into my IV, in walks a man. :( I remember feeling a bit shaky but then the drugs kicked in and off to sleep land I went.

Prolly just there to collect the speciMEN for the lab. :jester: . Path reports, waiting ...waiting...staying busy....I know my crystal ball is cracked, so I just keep my ass busy while waiting.....No, did I say that ***** now that was funny after I wrote it..so I left it. :) :tarot:

[mustangjeano]

congrats on getting thru that. I know the prep is the worst part. I remember how nice the drugs are---my nurse was very pretty so I might have said something innapropriate---oh well--she is probably used to that.
I will keep you in my thoughts til Friday when you get the GOOD NEWS!!!!
Jeano

[Novelafemme]

congrats on getting thru that. I know the prep is the worst part. I remember how nice the drugs are---my nurse was very pretty so I might have said something innapropriate---oh well--she is probably used to that.
I will keep you in my thoughts til Friday when you get the GOOD NEWS!!!!
Jeano

Good news would be fabulous, Mustangjeano!! I am not worried at all, actually. I have had a profound peace in my heart since all of this started back in May. Well, a few tiny meltdowns, but mostly fierce determination and lots of love and support from my family. :) I am blessed!

Tommi, you crack me up!! :) I think most of my anxiety around this whole procedure was about how many people would be looking at my pooper! In my mind there was going to be like 30-50 people in the room with me...all pointing and gasping and laughing. One might say I have a wee butt-hole complex. :bigcry:

[Tommi]

Good news would be fabulous, Mustangjeano!! I am not worried at all, actually. I have had a profound peace in my heart since all of this started back in May. Well, a few tiny meltdowns, but mostly fierce determination and lots of love and support from my family. :) I am blessed!

Tommi, you crack me up!! :) I think most of my anxiety around this whole procedure was about how many people would be looking at my pooper! In my mind there was going to be like 30-50 people in the room with me...all pointing and gasping and laughing. One might say I have a wee butt-hole complex. :bigcry:

Hah, there isn't room for more one person to get in a good wisecrack. Bah da Bumm..(f)

:happyjump:

[Tommi]

congrats on getting thru that. I know the prep is the worst part. I remember how nice the drugs are---my nurse was very pretty so I might have said something innapropriate---oh well--she is probably used to that.
I will keep you in my thoughts til Friday when you get the GOOD NEWS!!!!
Jeano

Jeano,
I hear ya on that one. I looked at the nurse that put in my IV before "That procedure" and said Hello Beautiful.
That was BEFORE the lights went out. :moonstars:

[Countyfem]

hey all, just a note to let you know Clay is doing ok, she goes in next tue for her second colon-scope, hopefully they will give her a date soon for the surgery, the waiting is driving her nuts (as to be expected) She hopes to be back online tonight or tomorrow..she misses you guys! :flowers:

[DapperButch]

I remember how nice the drugs are---my nurse was very pretty so I might have said something innapropriate---oh well--she is probably used to that.


Jeano,
I hear ya on that one. I looked at the nurse that put in my IV before "That procedure" and said Hello Beautiful.
That was BEFORE the lights went out. :moonstars:

I can "one up" you both.

My GI guy is this sweet, cute nerdy guy who has a huge smile and just randomly blushes for no reason.

After the colonoscopy as my g.f. was standing next to me and he was giving me the results I said, "You are really cute. If I wasn't gay I would be into you" (or something along those lines). Poor guy got all embarrassed and blushed (I think he did, anyway...I was all drugged up!). And imagine this, I did not remember I had said that until a couple of months after it happened! My g.f. had never mentioned it.

[DapperButch]

Just wanted to mention that my partner's mother's surgery went well and she is now home. They say that it went well. They will get the results of the biopsy on the lymph nodes next Tuesday.

[clay]

Hey everyone:
I am soooo happy to have internet back again. Damn I was miserable....thanks to all of you!!!! I caught up on the thread....
TO EVERYONE: thanks so much for checking in on me....for posting to me, and for all the well wishes , prayers, and just all around loving, kind support!
CATALINAROSE: AWesome job, my friend. It is NOT bad..at all..we don't know most of it anyway! lol...Just so you know, your doctor will have results withinb 48 hrs. CALL Them and ask what they are!!!! tomorrow. They will have results!!!
DAPPER: Please give T.F. my very best wishes and I will hold her, her mom, and you all up in my prayers!
JEAN: Excellent job..on so many years out.
DEBBY: Awaiting what your surgeon says.....I hold you close to my heart!!! PINKSTER, you!!!! I love you,. my angel!!!
TOMMI: dayummm..to have a "crystal ball" PLUS it be carcked...wowser..be very careful...lmao..hugs buddy!
OOAK: Hope things are good for you..haven't seen a post from you in a bit..take care...sending you best wishes! Hugs...
TO all the other BRAVE WARRIORS: Know I send each and everyone of you huge hugs......keep up the strong fight, stay focused, and stay positive! YOU are not alone!!!!
COUNTY: YOU are a truly amazing friend...and I am very blessed!!!!! It is so comforting knowing you will be there for Heidi, to be with me during surgery, and all that you are doing to help me, support me through this, and your friendship!!! I want you to know you have my utmost deepest thanks..always...May God bless you....you are truly an angel!
PURPLE SPARKLY ONE: YOU are such a guiding force, you send me the very best of energies, calmness, and serenity when I need it most! YOU are an incredible friend!!! Stay close to me...I validate you....along with Michael & Raphael! Thanks...and know I appreciate you..so very much...
Thanks, County & Debby...for posting for me..I appreciate you both..hugs...

TO ALL of you...please continue to hold me up in your loving thoughts, prayers, and well wishes! I heart you all...Clay

[clay]

My surgery is scheduled for December 9th! I am to be an early AM case...sooo....I will have an Exploratory Laparoscopy with Colectomy (colon resection) via open abdomen AND a Total Hystero via same incision! The Gastro Oncologist is going in first, then when he is done, the Gynie Oncologist will do her hystero magic! I will be in the hospital for 7 to 10 days. Rather than try to update each personally, UPDATES will be posted here!!! I am so going to kick this bugger's royal ass...mess with me..I will show it who is Alpha here!!! <smiles>
PS I have the lovely good luck to have to do a second colonoscopy the 29th. This time I get day one a bottle of mag. citrate, day two a GALLON of GoLytely! I will be having a "GoLytely" martini party..and will gladly share a glass with any of you....smiles...have an awesome day...Clay

[mustangjeano]

Dapper, thanks for the update on your partner's Mom. Glad the surgery went well and I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers.
Clay, You are a warrior man. You are inspiring. I will be with you in spirit and prayer.
Jeano

[Tommi]

Cancer is a pesky stop along our long road of life. In the wake of all the tests, and surgery and scary nights and days, just know there are millions of cancer survivors here on Planet Earth. "The Big C" is no longer the death sentence it once was for everyone that had a diagnosis.We stand tall (well ~ some of us don't stand tall as others but we think we do* ) We have been there, done that, and moved on.

For those of us, and those that have loved ones going through a scary time , and for those caring about and for the folks that need your love and encouragement I send Big Baskets of Love and candy and flowers.

claybaby, you are gonna be squeaky clean. So, you must have a while to get ready for the recovery at home process. Get a maid. Get a cook. Get comfy jammies that will be easy on and off.

They told me I couldn't lift anything heavier than a loaf of bread for the first several weeks and no sex****. :| and I was dating this beautiful, Hollywoood make-up artist, who came to take care of me post-op~~and ...well, I just knew that thing about no sex did not apply in my case* :fastdraq: I did NOT lift any bread :)


I can "one up" you both.

My GI guy is this sweet, cute nerdy guy who has a huge smile and just randomly blushes for no reason.

After the colonoscopy as my g.f. was standing next to me and he was giving me the results I said, "You are really cute. If I wasn't gay I would be into you" (or something along those lines). Poor guy got all embarrassed and blushed (I think he did, anyway...I was all drugged up!). And imagine this, I did not remember I had said that until a couple of months after it happened! My g.f. had never mentioned it.


And he was proud ...He probably is still sharing that story. ;)

Just wanted to mention that my partner's mother's surgery went well and she is now home. They say that it went well. They will get the results of the biopsy on the lymph nodes next Tuesday.

Dapper, While she is waiting I hope she can visualize her lil nodes being all nice and clean and clear of any cancer.

My surgery is scheduled for December 9th! I am to be an early AM case...sooo....I will have an Exploratory Laparoscopy with Colectomy (colon resection) via open abdomen AND a Total Hystero via same incision! The Gastro Oncologist is going in first, then when he is done, the Gynie Oncologist will do her hystero magic! I will be in the hospital for 7 to 10 days. Rather than try to update each personally, UPDATES will be posted here!!! I am so going to kick this bugger's royal ass...mess with me..I will show it who is Alpha here!!! <smiles>
PS I have the lovely good luck to have to do a second colonoscopy the 29th. This time I get day one a bottle of mag. citrate, day two a GALLON of GoLytely! I will be having a "GoLytely" martini party..and will gladly share a glass with any of you....smiles...have an awesome day...Clay

They are really going to take a good peak and some video's maybe for next season reruns.

Well clay, you will have the cleanest bowel that side of the Rio Grande and a grande time with all that drinkin'. Glad to see that you have two specialists doing the surgery.


Dapper, thanks for the update on your partner's Mom. Glad the surgery went well and I will keep her in my thoughts and prayers.
Clay, You are a warrior man. You are inspiring. I will be with you in spirit and prayer.
Jeano

Hey Jeano , we'll keep the fireplace stoked and the warm comfy wishes flowing. Glad to see you here.

Tommi

[DapperButch]

My surgery is scheduled for December 9th! I am to be an early AM case...sooo....I will have an Exploratory Laparoscopy with Colectomy (colon resection) via open abdomen AND a Total Hystero via same incision! The Gastro Oncologist is going in first, then when he is done, the Gynie Oncologist will do her hystero magic! I will be in the hospital for 7 to 10 days. Rather than try to update each personally, UPDATES will be posted here!!! I am so going to kick this bugger's royal ass...mess with me..I will show it who is Alpha here!!! <smiles>
PS I have the lovely good luck to have to do a second colonoscopy the 29th. This time I get day one a bottle of mag. citrate, day two a GALLON of GoLytely! I will be having a "GoLytely" martini party..and will gladly share a glass with any of you....smiles...have an awesome day...Clay

Hi, Clay. Just a reminder that my illness was colon cancer and I had a colon resection via the traditional, open method. I actually had to have a second resection because I an obstruction a couple of weeks later. SO, since I did it twice, I know quite a bit about the recovery if you need some info. at any point along the way.

Feel free to PM me. Hang in there. Glad to see your enthusiam at kicking this in the butt!

[JustJo]

Just a pre-holiday update....

Just got off the phone with my mother. She cheerfully tells me that the mass is gone, but that she forgot to pick up the written report.

She also tells me that they have taken her down to 12 hours in 24 on the TPN, in part to stimulate her appetite.

Her weight is up to 118.

Her next appointment is December 8 with the urologist (about that kidney that was acting up)...and she has chemo before that....but now I can book her flight for anything December 10 or after.

I should feel better about all of this, except that she sounds like she's lying.

I could call her doctor and ask for the truth...but I'm honestly just past it.

All of our old crap is coming back up...and I'm in for a 3 or 4 month flashback of my youth.

Someone please have bail money ready.

[clay]

[COLOR="Black"]claybaby, you are gonna be squeaky clean. So, you must have a while to get ready for the recovery at home process. Get a maid. Get a cook. Get comfy jammies that will be easy on and off.

They told me I couldn't lift anything heavier than a loaf of bread for the first several weeks and no sex****. :| and I was dating this beautiful, Hollywoood make-up artist, who came to take care of me post-op~~and ...well, I just knew that thing about no sex did not apply in my case* :fastdraq: I did NOT lift any bread :)





And he was proud ...He probably is still sharing that story. ;)



[B]

They are really going to take a good peak and some video's maybe for next season reruns.

Well clay, you will have the cleanest bowel that side of the Rio Grande and a grande time with all that drinkin'. Glad to see that you have two specialists doing the surgery.

Tommi



Tommi! Tommi! Tommi!!!! What am I to do with you, dude! LMAO.
I will most definitely NOT lift more than a loaf of bread! I have already had major abd. surg. March 2010...so I know all about the "no lifting" and " no sex" rules! Damnnnn...as far as a "maid" and a "cook"...I have even better...I have whom is my very best friend...coming to see to all of those things. So not only is she my best friend, she is beautiful, witty, and so gentle & kind....I have it the absolute best!!!! Best part of all...my dachshund, heidi will not have to go in a shelter....that was my biggest fear....her being left alone someplace...wink ....Clay
P to the S....hellls yes my colon will be squeaky clean..no one can say I am full of BS!...lol I will have a TWO DA prep this time..Mag. Citrate Sunday and the FULL gallon of GoLytlely Monday along with gallons and gallons of water plus a Dulcolax tablet!
ReRuns eh? Well all I can say is my ass will be used to everyone seeing by then..so have at it...ya brat...lmao


[COLOR="Red"]JEANO:[COLOR="Blue"] Thanks so much for your encouragement & support!!!![ I so appreciate you...hugs...Clay/COLOR]

[clay]

Hi, Clay. Just a reminder that my illness was colon cancer and I had a colon resection via the traditional, open method. I actually had to have a second resection because I an obstruction a couple of weeks later. SO, since I did it twice, I know quite a bit about the recovery if you need some info. at any point along the way.

Feel free to PM me. Hang in there. Glad to see your enthusiam at kicking this in the butt!

Hey DB:
THanks buddy! I appreciate the words...and wow..twice....oh my goodness. I have a very best friend who will be with me, and I am certain she won't let me get obstructed!!! I would like to ask you some questions though..so will PM you after a while..and thanks, my friend! Yes, I WILL kick this C..right in the ass....Debby said it best...she said she "made cancer her bitch"....smiles...go Debby!!!

[deb_U_taunt]

oh my, you do lose your modesty through this process. lol

Tommi! Tommi! Tommi!!!! What am I to do with you, dude! LMAO.
I will most definitely NOT lift more than a loaf of bread! I have already had major abd. surg. March 2010...so I know all about the "no lifting" and " no sex" rules! Damnnnn...as far as a "maid" and a "cook"...I have even better...I have whom is my very best friend...coming to see to all of those things. So not only is she my best friend, she is beautiful, witty, and so gentle & kind....I have it the absolute best!!!! Best part of all...my dachshund, heidi will not have to go in a shelter....that was my biggest fear....her being left alone someplace...wink ....Clay
P to the S....hellls yes my colon will be squeaky clean..no one can say I am full of BS!...lol I will have a TWO DA prep this time..Mag. Citrate Sunday and the FULL gallon of GoLytlely Monday along with gallons and gallons of water plus a Dulcolax tablet!
ReRuns eh? Well all I can say is my ass will be used to everyone seeing by then..so have at it...ya brat...lmao


JEANO:[COLOR="Blue"] Thanks so much for your encouragement & support!!!![ I so appreciate you...hugs...Clay/COLOR]

[clay]

oh my, you do lose your modesty through this process. lol

lmao...MODESTY...WTF is that? lol......and yes, you do lose it...may as well..ya ain't gonna know who all will see regarding "my bidness"anyway....hehehehhe
I'm MORE worried about what the Femme Brat Pack will do to me...lmao

[deb_U_taunt]

I am done with radiation. No double mastectomy (insurance won't pay for it, unless I have the genetics test and they won't pay for the $3500 test, UGH). So, I get things evened up about the end of January. I will have smaller, perky breasts!! yeehaw!!! I have hair coming in, a bit darker and hoping for the curls I keep hearing about.

Tommi! Tommi! Tommi!!!! What am I to do with you, dude! LMAO.
I will most definitely NOT lift more than a loaf of bread! I have already had major abd. surg. March 2010...so I know all about the "no lifting" and " no sex" rules! Damnnnn...as far as a "maid" and a "cook"...I have even better...I have whom is my very best friend...coming to see to all of those things. So not only is she my best friend, she is beautiful, witty, and so gentle & kind....I have it the absolute best!!!! Best part of all...my dachshund, heidi will not have to go in a shelter....that was my biggest fear....her being left alone someplace...wink ....Clay
P to the S....hellls yes my colon will be squeaky clean..no one can say I am full of BS!...lol I will have a TWO DA prep this time..Mag. Citrate Sunday and the FULL gallon of GoLytlely Monday along with gallons and gallons of water plus a Dulcolax tablet!
ReRuns eh? Well all I can say is my ass will be used to everyone seeing by then..so have at it...ya brat...lmao


JEANO:[COLOR="Blue"] Thanks so much for your encouragement & support!!!![ I so appreciate you...hugs...Clay/COLOR]

Hey DB:
THanks buddy! I appreciate the words...and wow..twice....oh my goodness. I have a very best friend who will be with me, and I am certain she won't let me get obstructed!!! I would like to ask you some questions though..so will PM you after a while..and thanks, my friend! Yes, I WILL kick this C..right in the ass....Debby said it best...she said she "made cancer her bitch"....smiles...go Debby!!!

[deb_U_taunt]

I spent so much time topless on tables during this lol

lmao...MODESTY...WTF is that? lol......and yes, you do lose it...may as well..ya ain't gonna know who all will see regarding "my bidness"anyway....hehehehhe
I'm MORE worried about what the Femme Brat Pack will do to me...lmao

[clay]

Sooo...Ms. Debby & Countyfem have joined forces...and now have a following of 6 OTHER FEMMES....to debaucher me while I am laid up and under the influence of drugs...
Seems they have decided I need to have HOT PINK GLITTER polish on my toes. Hot Blue Glitter polish on my hands...my hair gelled and spiked with PINK ribbons added...another friend has volunteered her HOT PINK GLITTER LIPSTICK for my lips...and I am CERTAIN Debby has encouraged them to add a pair of HOT PINK boxers and make pics of said feminized BUTCH and post here on thread.
ALL I can say is, one sweet femme has volunteered to bring a pitbull to "guard me"..and said countyfem has said that is okay, she will paint the dog's nails HOT PINK also.
Now I ask you...is anyone going to come to my defense OR will you cospire with said femmes to debaucher a poor, innocent, invalid BUTCH. Oh my...I won't ever be the same now.....<wink>
P to the S...I absolutely LOVE it....smiles....

[deb_U_taunt]

And I need to start making that pink t-shirt with glitter puffy paint that says 'cancer is my bitch'

Sooo...Ms. Debby & Countyfem have joined forces...and now have a following of 6 OTHER FEMMES....to debaucher me while I am laid up and under the influence of drugs...
Seems they have decided I need to have HOT PINK GLITTER polish on my toes. Hot Blue Glitter polish on my hands...my hair gelled and spiked with PINK ribbons added...another friend has volunteered her HOT PINK GLITTER LIPSTICK for my lips...and I am CERTAIN Debby has encouraged them to add a pair of HOT PINK boxers and make pics of said feminized BUTCH and post here on thread.
ALL I can say is, one sweet femme has volunteered to bring a pitbull to "guard me"..and said countyfem has said that is okay, she will paint the dog's nails HOT PINK also.
Now I ask you...is anyone going to come to my defense OR will you cospire with said femmes to debaucher a poor, innocent, invalid BUTCH. Oh my...I won't ever be the same now.....<wink>
P to the S...I absolutely LOVE it....smiles....

[clay]

And I need to start making that pink t-shirt with glitter puffy paint that says 'cancer is my bitch'

OMG..she don't need any more ideas.......BUT for you, beautiful, I WILL wear a pink with PINK puffy paint shirt...smiles....(hope ya gots a really, really BIG one..Imma BIG one...smiles...you so rock, my friend!!

[DapperButch]

Hey DB:
THanks buddy! I appreciate the words...and wow..twice....oh my goodness. I have a very best friend who will be with me, and I am certain she won't let me get obstructed!!! I would like to ask you some questions though..so will PM you after a while..and thanks, my friend! Yes, I WILL kick this C..right in the ass....Debby said it best...she said she "made cancer her bitch"....smiles...go Debby!!!

Unfortunately, adhesions is not something you can control. It is just about how the body heals on the inside (the obstruction was due to an adhesion).

It is unusual, however, to happen so soon after surgery. Usually if that happens to a person it happens a year later.

It is just a luck of the draw kind of thing.

[Tommi]

Just a pre-holiday update....

Just got off the phone with my mother. She cheerfully tells me that the mass is gone, but that she forgot to pick up the written report.

She also tells me that they have taken her down to 12 hours in 24 on the TPN, in part to stimulate her appetite.

Her weight is up to 118.

Her next appointment is December 8 with the urologist (about that kidney that was acting up)...and she has chemo before that....but now I can book her flight for anything December 10 or after.

I should feel better about all of this, except that she sounds like she's lying.

I could call her doctor and ask for the truth...but I'm honestly just past it.

All of our old crap is coming back up...and I'm in for a 3 or 4 month flashback of my youth.

Someone please have bail money ready.

Okay . Threeeeee deeeeeep cleansing breaths. The good and the bad, the yin and the yang, and the mother that is untrustworthy .Hmmm maybe some more deep breaths...and some chocloate, maybe?

[Countyfem]

Morning all! Clay is at the hospital for her second scoping, please send warm thoughts and good vibes her way!

(((((((((Clay))))))))))))))

[clay]

(((((((((((((((((((((((((County))))))))))))))))))) )))
Thanks for the hugs...smiles...and the update here!

POST ENDOSCOPY: I am home, resting...the Doc found a smaller nodule somewhere by the original malignancy....I don't remember if he told me if he biopsied it or not...he did put metal clip in it and mark it with the blue tat dye. It will be removed when the malignancy is removed! along with my hystero.
County is my miracle..she will be here next week for my surgery and will stay with me awhile post op...she is amazing!!!! I am forever indebted to her!!! My bestest buddy!!
SIDENOTE: I would really prefer any future TATTOOS to be externally... but hey where else can one get their colon tatted like this....lol

[Novelafemme]

{{{{Clay}}}}} I agree on the internal tats!!

I called my doctor yesterday to get the results from my colonoscopy and the receptionist asked that I come in tomorrow so she can go over the results with me in person. <gulp> Actually, I am not worried a bit. Everything they have found thus far has been caught at such an early stage that the prognosis has been really super positive. I am very thankful for modern medicine and technology and my wonderful support system that includes you lovely people. <3

[clay]

(((((((((CATALINA))))))))))...that is superb attitude to have!!! No matter what..it IS caught early...just stay focused on that!!! A great prognosis is in store for you...AND a healthy outlook is 90% of one's recovery success!
I couldn't agree more with you on the awesome love & support we have here! I heart the peeps here!! ALL of them..and their kind words, generosity towards me, and love has helped me to FIGHT harder!! We are all in this together!!!
So did you get one of those lovely blue tats, too...lol...at least they are exclusive...lol
Big hugs...I will be with you in spirit tomorrow...good luck Ms. Catalina Rose...Clay

[Novelafemme]

i don't remember her saying anything about a tat, clay. she just said that they removed several polyps. BUT...if i am ever to get another tat i would prefer it to be on the *outside* of my body. ;)

my gut feeling is that they are going to do a bowel resection on me as well, but that the procedure will get all the bad stuff and I can move forward with a clean bill of health. my boss keeps assuring me that early stage colon cancer is much like thyroid cancer in that it is extremely treatable with a very positive outcome 98% of the time.

[clay]

CatalinaRose:
Yes, early detection gives us an excellent prognosis.....and you will do awesome...as will I. It IS scary to get a diagnosis of the "c" and someone who has heard it firsthand understands that......but pick yourself an awesome, positive team, have faith in your docs, and believe!!! Find where your happy space is..and let no one intrude there. Mine is a dolphin cove...where I am one with them...as I have an affinity for dolphins....I kindly ask "naysayers" to please keep their opinions to themselves...and I don't read online stuff.....I don't "overload" my circuits with alternative treatments, etc...I listen to and believe in what my docs say..I have faith in medicine...and I have some incredibly amazing supporters here and IRL....find your space....go there often..and let no one come in that space..it helps me a lot...hugs.......Clay

[Novelafemme]

Hi Everyone. I got my results today but I can't even think about them because an hour later my oldest sister called me to share news of her own. She was diagnosed 5 weeks ago with lymphoma. She has several spots and one large tumor in her left lung. I think the name if it is B-cell lymphoma. She started chemo last Friday and is feeling pretty overwhelmed by everything. She apologized profusely for not telling all of us siblings earlier but said she just needed time to come to terms with it all herself.

I am in shock. And I am so fucking angry at cancer. Lisa is this amazing, bright light of a beautiful person. She has always taken so much pride in her health...she teaches vinyasa yoga and is a massage therapist and is about to enter her thesis semester in grad school. I was laying in bed just now trying to fall asleep and the tears just came out of no where. It felt so good to have a long cry.

Please keep my wonderful sister in your thoughts if you can. And thank you all for letting me vent. I probably will be scarce for a bit since I'm entering finals week, but you are all never far from my heart.

[mustangjeano]

Hi Everyone. I got my results today but I can't even think about them because an hour later my oldest sister called me to share news of her own. She was diagnosed 5 weeks ago with lymphoma. She has several spots and one large tumor in her left lung. I think the name if it is B-cell lymphoma. She started chemo last Friday and is feeling pretty overwhelmed by everything. She apologized profusely for not telling all of us siblings earlier but said she just needed time to come to terms with it all herself.

I am in shock. And I am so fucking angry at cancer. Lisa is this amazing, bright light of a beautiful person. She has always taken so much pride in her health...she teaches vinyasa yoga and is a massage therapist and is about to enter her thesis semester in grad school. I was laying in bed just now trying to fall asleep and the tears just came out of no where. It felt so good to have a long cry.

Please keep my wonderful sister in your thoughts if you can. And thank you all for letting me vent. I probably will be scarce for a bit since I'm entering finals week, but you are all never far from my heart.

Sending healing thoughts to you and your sister. Remember we are here whenever you need us. Jean

[Tommi]

http://enviad.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/Fall1.jpg

http://ny-attractions.com/img/36/36a/Master_Reiki_Meditation_Music_Calm_Abiding_Music_T herapy_Out_Of_Body_Experience.jpg

Sending Debby, Clay, Catalina Rose, her Sis, and those on it and along side this healing journey some GOOD KARMA.
http://www.buddhachannel.tv/portail/local/cache-vignettes/L400xH300/Thai-monk-2-283d9.gif

[clay]

Sending positive and warm energies, healing love to CatalinaRose, to her sister, and to all else who have a need for some...and to all the Brave Warriors here......may you all find the good karma, serenity, and healing that is needed.....we are all here for one another! I heart you all..and each of YOU are a HERO to me...Clay

[DapperButch]

Hi Everyone. I got my results today but I can't even think about them because an hour later my oldest sister called me to share news of her own. She was diagnosed 5 weeks ago with lymphoma. She has several spots and one large tumor in her left lung. I think the name if it is B-cell lymphoma. She started chemo last Friday and is feeling pretty overwhelmed by everything. She apologized profusely for not telling all of us siblings earlier but said she just needed time to come to terms with it all herself.

I am in shock. And I am so fucking angry at cancer. Lisa is this amazing, bright light of a beautiful person. She has always taken so much pride in her health...she teaches vinyasa yoga and is a massage therapist and is about to enter her thesis semester in grad school. I was laying in bed just now trying to fall asleep and the tears just came out of no where. It felt so good to have a long cry.

Please keep my wonderful sister in your thoughts if you can. And thank you all for letting me vent. I probably will be scarce for a bit since I'm entering finals week, but you are all never far from my heart.

I'm sorry this is happening to your sister. I will keep both of you in my thoughts.

When you can, please let us know the results of your colonoscopy. I, and I would suspect others, are concerned about it since you said in a prior post that you suspect that you will have to get a bowel resection. That is pretty serious stuff, so I am concerned.

Take care and hang in there the best you can.

[Novelafemme]

Hi Dapper, Thank you for being patient with me while I re-group.

So all but one of the polyps removed were PRE cancerous. Since my situation has been so unusual, along with such a stong family history of cancer, my doc sent them off for further genetic testing which all came back negative. YAY!!! So I do NOT need any further surgeries but will go back in six months for another colonoscopy and if that comes back fine then I go every year for the next five years. Since the adenoma on my appendix and colon was self contained they will monitor me closely, possibly scheduling a PET scan in the Spring and hopefully that will be that. Everything thus far has been found VERY early and has all been self contained so has been very easily treatable. The biggest concern was the mass on my appendix because they were worried it had perforated my bowel. Thankfully that did not happen! My sister's cancer was also detected VERY early. Since she was diagnosed as a stage 4, she was concerned that she had beein living with cancer for a long time. Her endo seems to think this all started about 4 months ago. I am just so thankful they found hers so early. And also thankful that we are both so in tune with our bodies that we know when something isn't right.

Thank you all for your support. It means more to me than you know. It so much easier for me to talk here about this than to anyone in real time. I just don't like that kind of attention, if that makes sense.

Hugs and love to all, CR.

[Countyfem]

[[[[[[[[[[ CatalinaRose]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

you and your sister are in my thoughts and prayers! so glad your news was on the positive side!

[Novelafemme]

I have another quick question for those of you who have had radical hysterectomies due to cancer. Since we can't do hormone replacement therapy, what are some effective ways you all manage hot flashes and sleepless nights. My mood has been amazing since having everything out and I LOVE not having a monthly period, but the hot flashes are killing me! I have such empathy for menopausal women now...I had NO idea how yucky hot flashes could be.

I am still running which seems to help and I no longer drink alcohol <sniff> but are there other things we can do?

[DapperButch]

I have another quick question for those of you who have had radical hysterectomies due to cancer. Since we can't do hormone replacement therapy, what are some effective ways you all manage hot flashes and sleepless nights. My mood has been amazing since having everything out and I LOVE not having a monthly period, but the hot flashes are killing me! I have such empathy for menopausal women now...I had NO idea how yucky hot flashes could be.

I am still running which seems to help and I no longer drink alcohol <sniff> but are there other things we can do?

Catalina - have you looked to see if their are supplements that are recommended to help with hot flashes? If it were me, I would start there.

[JustJo]

So....I've known that my mother was lying to me....and she arrives in two days. This is the timing in which she usually "comes clean" because she knows she can't lie to my face and get away with it.

They have extended her chemo another 6 months...and apparently she's not responding as well as she had been letting on.

Her doctor has also said that she needn't go to Miami to the top-rated chemo center for treatments, but can go right here in PSL and that will be "just fine."

I'm pretty sure that's because the chemo isn't curing anything...and is just delaying the inevitable...and he's stopped pretending otherwise.

Fuck.

[clay]

(((((((((((((((((((Debby))))))))))))))))))))))
I heart you, my beautiful and lovely friend!! Congratulations, honey!!!


(((((((((((((((CatalinaRose))))))))))))))))))))))) )
Hugs to you, keep that spirit..and a BIG hug to your sister....smiles..


(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((DB))))))))))))))))))) ))...Have a wonderful week....hugs to you...


(((((((((((((((((((((((((COUNTYFEM)))))))))))))))) ))))) you are the BESTEST!!! You so rockkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!! THANK YOU!


(((((((((((((((((((((((JustJo))))))))))))))))))))) ))))....big hugs to you..I so hope your mom will be allright..and you will enjoy the visit...hugs to you both.,..
to all the other BRAVE WARRIORS....fight on...and stay strong! I know I am!!!
I heart you all...big butch hugs..Clay

[Novelafemme]

So....I've known that my mother was lying to me....and she arrives in two days. This is the timing in which she usually "comes clean" because she knows she can't lie to my face and get away with it.

They have extended her chemo another 6 months...and apparently she's not responding as well as she had been letting on.

Her doctor has also said that she needn't go to Miami to the top-rated chemo center for treatments, but can go right here in PSL and that will be "just fine."

I'm pretty sure that's because the chemo isn't curing anything...and is just delaying the inevitable...and he's stopped pretending otherwise.

Fuck.


{{{{{{{{{{Jo}}}}}}}}}}}}

[Dominique]

I have another quick question for those of you who have had radical hysterectomies due to cancer. Since we can't do hormone replacement therapy, what are some effective ways you all manage hot flashes and sleepless nights. My mood has been amazing since having everything out and I LOVE not having a monthly period, but the hot flashes are killing me! I have such empathy for menopausal women now...I had NO idea how yucky hot flashes could be.

I am still running which seems to help and I no longer drink alcohol <sniff> but are there other things we can do?

This is coming from the woman who LOVED the COLD so much, I sufferred thru frostbite TWICE.....black cohash tea!

[Novelafemme]

This is coming from the woman who LOVED the COLD so much, I sufferred thru frostbite TWICE.....black cohash tea!

Oooooh yes! Someone else mentioned this to me the other day. We were sitting at breakfast with a dear friend of mine, Amanda, and my oldest says to me, "mom, why is your face all shiney?" I was literally melting but trying to hide it, lol. OK, black cohosh tea, CHECK!

[Countyfem]

K ya'll Clay is in surgery, will be 4-6 h, I'll update when its all said and done. Send good vibes her way!

[DapperButch]

K ya'll Clay is in surgery, will be 4-6 h, I'll update when its all said and done. Send good vibes her way!

Thanks for the information. So strange, I was just about to click on this thread to ask about her.

CountryFem, PM me (or post here), if either of you have any questions about recovery. I had a colon resection last year, so let me know it I can be of any help.

For me, it was a rough recovery. But, part of that is because I had to get it done twice (2 weeks apart), due to adhesions, so how "rough" it is, is probably a bit skewed for me. I do know that I wondered if I was having a normal recovery from time to time, so if I can be of help, I am here.

Also, remember to take care of yourself while taking care of Clay.

[MysticOceansFL]

I always make a donate for cancer , My mother died of lung and bone cancer back in 1984 and my best friend from high school died also from bone and lung cancer in 2000 and she was only 36 years old. So here I leave a lited candle for all those to remembering. :candle::candle::candle::candle::candle:

[Countyfem]

K ya'll Clay is in surgery, will be 4-6 h, I'll update when its all said and done. Send good vibes her way!

Ok first part is OVER the Histo is done, doc said everything was contained within the uterus and that it looked precancerous...great news there. They sent it off to be sliced and diced to confirm. The second part is now under way....

Dapper, thanks for the thoughts, and you can be sure we'll be hitting you up with any questions!
Right now I'm running off coffee, I'll catch up with myself later!

[Novelafemme]

Ok first part is OVER the Histo is done, doc said everything was contained within the uterus and that it looked precancerous...great news there. They sent it off to be sliced and diced to confirm. The second part is now under way....

Dapper, thanks for the thoughts, and you can be sure we'll be hitting you up with any questions!
Right now I'm running off coffee, I'll catch up with myself later!

Excellent news, CF! Sometimes the nastiest looking uterus comes back the cleanest. You just never know!! Clay is gonna feel SO much better having all that out.

Thank you for the update and please take good care of yourself!!

[Bard]

Ok first part is OVER the Histo is done, doc said everything was contained within the uterus and that it looked precancerous...great news there. They sent it off to be sliced and diced to confirm. The second part is now under way....

Dapper, thanks for the thoughts, and you can be sure we'll be hitting you up with any questions!
Right now I'm running off coffee, I'll catch up with myself later!

please give Clay Desd's and my love we will be thinking of her and sending good thoughts. thank you so much for the updates

[Countyfem]

Clay is out of surgery, she did great...the doc's were real pleased with what they didn't find! Both spots were contained, all parts removed cleanly...including the nodule that was found next to the mass. They have sent the leftovers to the lab but both the doc's feel real positive, so keep your fingers crossed.
She has just been moved to an interm room as they want to keep a close eye on her tonight. I got to see her briefly and she has good color, they are doing a great job of pain managment and her stats are great. Once they get her into her spot on the ward I'll be able to go sit with her till 7, then they are gonna kick me out till 8 am Lucky for me they have some comfy couches in the waiting area and they supply pillows and a blanket.

Stay tuned!

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Clay is out of surgery, she did great...the doc's were real pleased with what they didn't find! Both spots were contained, all parts removed cleanly...including the nodule that was found next to the mass. They have sent the leftovers to the lab but both the doc's feel real positive, so keep your fingers crossed.
She has just been moved to an interm room as they want to keep a close eye on her tonight. I got to see her briefly and she has good color, they are doing a great job of pain managment and her stats are great. Once they get her into her spot on the ward I'll be able to go sit with her till 7, then they are gonna kick me out till 8 am Lucky for me they have some comfy couches in the waiting area and they supply pillows and a blanket.

Stay tuned!

Thank you for letting us know - please tell Clay I'm thinking about her and sending my love and best wishes.

Hope you're doing well, too!

[Rockinonahigh]

K ya'll Clay is in surgery, will be 4-6 h, I'll update when its all said and done. Send good vibes her way!

Thanks for the up date on Clay,give her my best when she is awake enough,im sending loads of energy and good vibes.It wont be long till she will be flirting with the nurses.

[Cid]

Clay is out of surgery, she did great...the doc's were real pleased with what they didn't find! Both spots were contained, all parts removed cleanly...including the nodule that was found next to the mass. They have sent the leftovers to the lab but both the doc's feel real positive, so keep your fingers crossed.
She has just been moved to an interm room as they want to keep a close eye on her tonight. I got to see her briefly and she has good color, they are doing a great job of pain managment and her stats are great. Once they get her into her spot on the ward I'll be able to go sit with her till 7, then they are gonna kick me out till 8 am Lucky for me they have some comfy couches in the waiting area and they supply pillows and a blanket.

Stay tuned!

Thanks for the great news! Please tell her I'm still requesting Angels to watch over her :praying: :angel:

[DapperButch]

Clay is out of surgery, she did great...the doc's were real pleased with what they didn't find! Both spots were contained, all parts removed cleanly...including the nodule that was found next to the mass. They have sent the leftovers to the lab but both the doc's feel real positive, so keep your fingers crossed.
She has just been moved to an interm room as they want to keep a close eye on her tonight. I got to see her briefly and she has good color, they are doing a great job of pain managment and her stats are great. Once they get her into her spot on the ward I'll be able to go sit with her till 7, then they are gonna kick me out till 8 am Lucky for me they have some comfy couches in the waiting area and they supply pillows and a blanket.

Stay tuned!

Thanks for the update.

Hope to hear from you again tonight, after seeing Clay.

[SweetJane]

Countyfemme,
Thanks for the updates. I have been wondering how everything was going. Please keep us all posted.

[mustangjeano]

Clay is out of surgery, she did great...the doc's were real pleased with what they didn't find! Both spots were contained, all parts removed cleanly...including the nodule that was found next to the mass. They have sent the leftovers to the lab but both the doc's feel real positive, so keep your fingers crossed.
She has just been moved to an interm room as they want to keep a close eye on her tonight. I got to see her briefly and she has good color, they are doing a great job of pain managment and her stats are great. Once they get her into her spot on the ward I'll be able to go sit with her till 7, then they are gonna kick me out till 8 am Lucky for me they have some comfy couches in the waiting area and they supply pillows and a blanket.

Stay tuned!

Such great news. Thank you Countyfem for updating us and most of all for being you. Please give Clay my best when she is up to having greetings.

[Countyfem]

Morning everyone, Clay is still doing well, more alert this morning, bit of a rough night (some spasms as her inside are starting to readjust) but much better now, they are going to get her up into the chair this afternoon and PT is schd to come by either late this afternoon or in the am. Doc's came in this morning and all is par for the course.

Keep all the good vibes flowing!

[DapperButch]

Morning everyone, Clay is still doing well, more alert this morning, bit of a rough night (some spasms as her inside are starting to readjust) but much better now, they are going to get her up into the chair this afternoon and PT is schd to come by either late this afternoon or in the am. Doc's came in this morning and all is par for the course.

Keep all the good vibes flowing!

Hey, Countryfem, thanks for posting. Any word on the tumor in her colon? You said that the mass in her uterus looked precancerous, but what is the word on the tumor found in her colon?

[DapperButch]

Morning everyone, Clay is still doing well, more alert this morning, bit of a rough night (some spasms as her inside are starting to readjust) but much better now, they are going to get her up into the chair this afternoon and PT is schd to come by either late this afternoon or in the am. Doc's came in this morning and all is par for the course.

Keep all the good vibes flowing!

I wonder why PT is coming in.

They had me up and walking the day after surgery. It is all about getting the bowels moving. I walked around that unit for 6 days until I finally had a bowel movement and could go home (went home on day 7).

The second surgery took longer. I was in there for 12 days or something like that (the first 3 were spent with me just laying there, waiting to see if somehow the adhesions weren't as bad as they appeared and surgery wouldn't be necessary). I was up and walking every hour I wanted out so bad. The nurses were like, what the hell?

Finally an old school midnight shift nurse came in and said, "I don't care that they say, you are drinking prune juice tonight". Did I go to the bathroom? Damn straight I did. :) (supposedly one is not supposed to drink prune juice anymore after a colon resection). The other secret? Lay on her left side.

[Countyfem]

Hey, Countryfem, thanks for posting. Any word on the tumor in her colon? You said that the mass in her uterus looked precancerous, but what is the word on the tumor found in her colon?

That one was cancerous, but contained to that area, he took a 1/3 of her bowel out and he seems confident that he got all of it. They will know for sure once the bi-op gets back from the lab.
They are doing a really good job of pain managment, I'm quite impressed. He is not going to let her have any liguids by mouth till Mon , once they get her up and in the chair this afternoon we hope the bloating and pressure will start to ease, that has been the biggest issue so far.

[Countyfem]

He has PT coming in as she fell a couple weeks ago, stepped off the curb and her knee went south so he just wants to make sure she won't have any further issues once they get her walking around. They really cover all the bases here, I'm very pleased with that as well!

[Rockinonahigh]

Morning everyone, Clay is still doing well, more alert this morning, bit of a rough night (some spasms as her inside are starting to readjust) but much better now, they are going to get her up into the chair this afternoon and PT is schd to come by either late this afternoon or in the am. Doc's came in this morning and all is par for the course.

Keep all the good vibes flowing!

Thanks for the up date,give clay my best.

[Rockinonahigh]

He has PT coming in as she fell a couple weeks ago, stepped off the curb and her knee went south so he just wants to make sure she won't have any further issues once they get her walking around. They really cover all the bases here, I'm very pleased with that as well!

Yeah,knees can be a pain to deal with,been there and done that.

[DapperButch]

I wonder why PT is coming in.

They had me up and walking the day after surgery. It is all about getting the bowels moving. I walked around that unit for 6 days until I finally had a bowel movement and could go home (went home on day 7).

The second surgery took longer. I was in there for 12 days or something like that (the first 3 were spent with me just laying there, waiting to see if somehow the adhesions weren't as bad as they appeared and surgery wouldn't be necessary). I was up and walking every hour I wanted out so bad. The nurses were like, what the hell?

Finally an old school midnight shift nurse came in and said, "I don't care that they say, you are drinking prune juice tonight". Did I go to the bathroom? Damn straight I did. :) (supposedly one is not supposed to drink prune juice anymore after a colon resection). The other secret? Lay on her left side.

Ooops, meant to say the nurse said, "I don't care WHAT they say", not THAT they say. Everyone knows prune juice helps to have a bowel movement, but supposedly for people with colon resections the sediment is bad for you. I knew this, but I am glad that I trusted the nurse and just went with it. You can't get released from the hospital until you have a bowel movement after a resection.

It was the same nurse that told me to lay on my left side. I know that this really does help b/c I found that after being home, until my bowel system got to a semi-regular state, every time I rolled over to my left side in bed, I had to pop up to go to the bathroom. Kind of weird.

Anyway, you will find that in a 1-3 days Clay will become obsessed with having a bowel movement in order to get the hell out of there! Plus, the nurses ask you every other minute if you have had one. They also warn you of this! lol

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Morning everyone, Clay is still doing well, more alert this morning, bit of a rough night (some spasms as her inside are starting to readjust) but much better now, they are going to get her up into the chair this afternoon and PT is schd to come by either late this afternoon or in the am. Doc's came in this morning and all is par for the course.

Keep all the good vibes flowing!

Thank you for letting us know - so, glad Clay is doing well!

[Tommi]

http://www.turnbacktogod.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/christmas-animated-gifs-06.gif

Keeping the beacon on for those that need it. Stay warm, and give safe hugs and get some back attcha.

[DapperButch]

That one was cancerous, but contained to that area, he took a 1/3 of her bowel out and he seems confident that he got all of it. They will know for sure once the bi-op gets back from the lab.
They are doing a really good job of pain managment, I'm quite impressed. He is not going to let her have any liguids by mouth till Mon , once they get her up and in the chair this afternoon we hope the bloating and pressure will start to ease, that has been the biggest issue so far.

Glad to hear they believe they got it all, but I want to share something with you. They told me the same thing after the operation, only to find out a couple days later that it was in 1 lymph node, so I did have to have chemo.

I wouldn't suggest passing the above information onto Clay right now as it may just worry her, but I want to pass it along to you, just so that you are not overly surprised if they come back saying they found it in a few lymph nodes. I just hope that the doc made it clear that it is possible that it really could be in the lymph system and chemo would have to be done in that case. I was too drugged both visits, so it didn't effect me, but hearing everything is fine and then a few days later hearing the cancer traveled into the lymphatic system was upsetting for both my mother and partner.

:praying: <--- praying the doc is right and was not found in any lymph nodes

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

That one was cancerous, but contained to that area, he took a 1/3 of her bowel out and he seems confident that he got all of it. They will know for sure once the bi-op gets back from the lab.
They are doing a really good job of pain managment, I'm quite impressed. He is not going to let her have any liguids by mouth till Mon , once they get her up and in the chair this afternoon we hope the bloating and pressure will start to ease, that has been the biggest issue so far.

Please pass on my love and prayers and well wishes to Clay!

[SweetJane]

Countyfemme,
I'm glad you're there with Clay. Thanks for keeping us posted. She still has a long journey ahead but you're there to help.

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

Countyfemme,
I'm glad you're there with Clay. Thanks for keeping us posted. She still has a long journey ahead but you're there to help.

I agree, Jane, I am also very grateful that Countryfemme is there for Clay! She really is an angel!

[Countyfem]

Rough night, wheww poor Clay fluid buldup in her stomach couldn't get a good breath and they didn't tube her till this morning after the doc saw her...once the tube was in she felt soooo much better...she is finally resting and we hope she is moved to a private room today. Her pain lvl is great she hasn't had to "hit" the little extra button, they still have her on the epiy and it is working really well for her. I feel so bad for her and there's not much I can do but keep watch and hold her hand when she needs it I really feel kinda useless

Will update later! Thanks so much for all the support!

[JustJo]

Hello everyone....just popping in to give an update...

Mom arrived yesterday evening....very underweight, looking exhausted and, of course, refusing her wheelchair and carrying too much stuff through the airport...grrrrrrr.

Got her home and settled in. She's confused how to work this different TPN pump, so a call is in to the nurse to come give her a lesson. In the meantime, she's already eating and drinking better here...because I'm pushy, and I cook. The key issue will be how much of it she can hang on to long enough to do her any good.

So far she's had homemade pumpkin bread, tea with local honey, some scrambled egg with a little cheese, whole wheat toast without crusts and a little fresh orange juice (diluted with water). She took a bite of my steak....but only one. Part of her issue is that everything was tasting bad to her....and this all went reasonably well, so we'll see.

Chemo is extended 6 months, but she's still saying she wants to go home in the spring and is keeping her house. In the next breath, she's telling me where everything is stored and hidden....just in case.

[ArkansasPiscesGrrl]

Rough night, wheww poor Clay fluid buldup in her stomach couldn't get a good breath and they didn't tube her till this morning after the doc saw her...once the tube was in she felt soooo much better...she is finally resting and we hope she is moved to a private room today. Her pain lvl is great she hasn't had to "hit" the little extra button, they still have her on the epiy and it is working really well for her. I feel so bad for her and there's not much I can do but keep watch and hold her hand when she needs it I really feel kinda useless

Will update later! Thanks so much for all the support!

Countryfemme, holding Clay's hand when she needs it and just BEING there is more than you could ever know. Truly an angel you are!

I had a hospital stay once, I was in the most incredible abdominal pain I could imagine, the docs could find nothing to pinpoint the why, so I just suffered. My partner at the time was a nurse, for God sake. She could not bring herself there to visit at all during the 5 days I was there. I should have known by that, yanno?

[Countyfem]

Ok the nurses are going to be soooo ready to be rid of my ass, I rode them HARD today....but if i don't feel things are as they should be I'm going to speak up! I had them in here three times before they finally admitted the N/G wasn't pulling the fluid that it is mean to do and fixed it.
And can I say that Clay is one stubborn butch! Has taken all my fem wiles to get her to do what she needs to do lol I really hope tonight is better for her...lord I hope so.

[SweetJane]

Ok the nurses are going to be soooo ready to be rid of my ass, I rode them HARD today....but if i don't feel things are as they should be I'm going to speak up! I had them in here three times before they finally admitted the N/G wasn't pulling the fluid that it is mean to do and fixed it.
And can I say that Clay is one stubborn butch! Has taken all my fem wiles to get her to do what she needs to do lol I really hope tonight is better for her...lord I hope so.

Countyfemme,
You keep riding their butts!!!! Clay can't speak for herself (we'll she could but...is loopy from meds). And someone needs to be her advocate. I'm glad you're there!

[DapperButch]

Rough night, wheww poor Clay fluid buldup in her stomach couldn't get a good breath and they didn't tube her till this morning after the doc saw her...once the tube was in she felt soooo much better...she is finally resting and we hope she is moved to a private room today. Her pain lvl is great she hasn't had to "hit" the little extra button, they still have her on the epiy and it is working really well for her. I feel so bad for her and there's not much I can do but keep watch and hold her hand when she needs it I really feel kinda useless

Will update later! Thanks so much for all the support!

I am wondering which tube you mean? The in the nose down the throat or the drainage tube from the bowel area?

[Countyfem]

I am wondering which tube you mean? The in the nose down the throat or the drainage tube from the bowel area?

Its the N/G (nasogastric) nose to stomach, she had a fairly uneventful night, couple times she vomited when the nurse was flushing her line as she was already backed up and they push 4-6 oz of saline on top of that..her major complaint at the moment.. every time she wakes up she gets the hiccups!
They decided to leave the epi in one more day, I'm glad of that as her bowels are still not responding. Longer they can keep her off the narcotics the better. She rarely hits the pain meds, which is good, but I fear that will change once the epi is gone.
They are going to get her up and back in a chair today,I'm hoping she'll get to moving around more, that's what she needs to be doing to stimulate the bowel activity. Hurts like hell but I keep telling her she has to work thru it and it'll get better.

[Tommi]

Ok the nurses are going to be soooo ready to be rid of my ass, I rode them HARD today....but if i don't feel things are as they should be I'm going to speak up! I had them in here three times before they finally admitted the N/G wasn't pulling the fluid that it is mean to do and fixed it.
And can I say that Clay is one stubborn butch! Has taken all my fem wiles to get her to do what she needs to do lol I really hope tonight is better for her...lord I hope so.

Glad to see you are wide eyed and busy tailed about what you see. :fastdraq: It is a vicious circle, with the surgery, then the meds which slow down all the internal workings, but she really needs the pain meds as often as she can have em. Which all in all helps it all work out in the end, and they will end the heavy meds. once she is able.

I watched my best buddy go through something similar, and you being at the bedside and observant is a blessing for Clay, and rough on you. (f)Clay prolly won't remmeber much of it later. Spoonful of sugar for the hiccups. :phonegab:

[JustJo]

Hi everyone,

The new TPN pump has been figured out, after 4 calls to the nurse and a few panic moments. She's on it 12 hours a day now rather than 24 because they're trying to "stimulate her appetite".

I got her to eat 5 times yesterday but quantities are very, very small. And, I'm in a bit of an internal tussle because the thing she seems to handle the best is greek yogurt....right when I have concerns about dairy products. Joy.

She has napped a few times...slept 12 hours last night...and is much more comfortable in the warmth of south Florida...so that's all good. Her first appointment with the new doctor is this afternoon...so it'll be interesting to see what's said. I am now inserting myself into all doctor visits....enough of this being in the dark.

[Tommi]

Hi everyone,

The new TPN pump has been figured out, after 4 calls to the nurse and a few panic moments. She's on it 12 hours a day now rather than 24 because they're trying to "stimulate her appetite".

I got her to eat 5 times yesterday but quantities are very, very small. And, I'm in a bit of an internal tussle because the thing she seems to handle the best is greek yogurt....right when I have concerns about dairy products. Joy.

She has napped a few times...slept 12 hours last night...and is much more comfortable in the warmth of south Florida...so that's all good. Her first appointment with the new doctor is this afternoon...so it'll be interesting to see what's said. I am now inserting myself into all doctor visits....enough of this being in the dark.

HANG IN THERE. Great news that you have her in a warm place, is she is eating anything, and you are in the Medical forefront with her.....Greek Yogurt is all good stuff for her.

I know we spend time online looking for Stuff... so, here is a great site--> http://curetoday.com CURE magazine, a free publication for those on the cancer journey, is the indispensable guide for ... Current Issue · Archive · Patient Guides · Subscription ... and you can get a free hardcopy magazine for her to look through.

Protein needs. Tried BOOST PLUS at Walgreens or CVS? Or the CVS brand in small cans too.

I have been caretaking an Ex of long ago, who has lost a lot of weight, has COPD and almost died. We live about 45 minutes apart. I got her to eat 6 to 8 times a day, by trickery. I noticed all she was eating was candy, ice cream, sweets of any kind. So, told her food has to be taken first, then the treats. She is unable to shop for herself, so, she makes me a list now. Coffee Ice cream, candy corn, Dibbs, Snickers. LMAO....
Today, I get an email from Peg wanting Corn Dogs and Mac N Cheese if I come by. :|

I think of her like a hummingbird. Constant small meals. Finding that BOOST PLUS, Strawberry is her favorite thing in life has been a good thing. She went through 18 last week, which I know was better than the 40 pound weight loss.

So, have a great day everyone. It is a great pouring rainy day here in Southern California.

[Rockinonahigh]

Ok the nurses are going to be soooo ready to be rid of my ass, I rode them HARD today....but if i don't feel things are as they should be I'm going to speak up! I had them in here three times before they finally admitted the N/G wasn't pulling the fluid that it is mean to do and fixed it.
And can I say that Clay is one stubborn butch! Has taken all my fem wiles to get her to do what she needs to do lol I really hope tonight is better for her...lord I hope so.

Im thankfull u r there for Clay,stay on the nurses about his care anytime u feel its needed.This isnt an easy road he is on so he will be grumpy but it looks like u are handleing it fine...bless u girl for being who u r.:bunchflowers:

[JustJo]

It was a rough afternoon.

Took Mom to see the new doctor...who was more honest and clear than her previous doctors have been. He was very supportive, but also frank that this type of cancer doesn't get better. They can keep her alive on chemo...but as soon as the chemo stops...the cancer will keep coming back. If the chemo stops, she probably has a few months.

[DapperButch]

I got her to eat 5 times yesterday but quantities are very, very small. And, I'm in a bit of an internal tussle because the thing she seems to handle the best is greek yogurt....right when I have concerns about dairy products. Joy.



Jo, please consider giving her whey protein isolate shakes. Whey isolate protein powder mixed with berries and soy milk for protein and calories. You can throw non dairy ice cream into the blender if she doesn't like it with just berries.

Whey inhibits cancer.

[DapperButch]

Its the N/G (nasogastric) nose to stomach

That is so odd, mine was in place prior to waking up from the surgery. Glad you said something!

[Tommi]

It was a rough afternoon.

Took Mom to see the new doctor...who was more honest and clear than her previous doctors have been. He was very supportive, but also frank that this type of cancer doesn't get better. They can keep her alive on chemo...but as soon as the chemo stops...the cancer will keep coming back. If the chemo stops, she probably has a few months.

Jo, Thinking about , let alone Talking about palliative care, and end of life are tough.
There are a lor os sites that describe what it is about, but it sure is different with each patient, caregiver, loved one, and family. Other's to talk it over wiht may help. I copied this brief spot below, as an intro. Don't sit alone with this. Reach out if you can, and get some help. Find out what her coverage is for home health nurse visits, etc.

I went through this recently with a friend, and it was good for her and her family to know what to expect.

Best regards, Tommi

" Palliative Care Goals

The goal of palliative care is simply to relieve suffering and improve quality of life. Further goals are then based on the patient's wishes in consultation with the palliative care team.

Read more about determining the goals of care. ** (http://dying.about.com/gi/o.htm?zi=1/XJ&zTi=1&sdn=dying&cdn=health&tm=42&f=00&su=p1051.2.336.ip_&tt=2&bt=1&bts=0&zu=http%3A//www.getpalliativecare.org/providers)

Palliative care is more than just treating physical symptoms, however. Palliative care also addresses emotional suffering and spiritual care needs.

The Palliative Care Team

Palliative care is often carried out by a team of professionals who can address multiple concerns. The team may include:

Palliative care physicians
Palliative care nurse practitioners
Nurses
Social workers
Chaplains
Therapists (occupational, speech, physical, etc.)
The most important member of the palliative care team is YOU. Palliative care should be directed toward meeting your personal goals. It is your responsibility as a palliative care patient to make your goals and health care wishes known.

Learn more about finding palliative care. (http://dying.about.com/od/findingpalliativecare/a/findingcare.htm)

[Countyfem]

Hi everyone,

Her first appointment with the new doctor is this afternoon...so it'll be interesting to see what's said. I am now inserting myself into all doctor visits....enough of this being in the dark.

Hello, my thoughts are with you, its great you have put your hat into the ring. I had to do that with my now ex-mom-in-law. The doctors were throwing so much lingo at her that she really only heard/understood maybe a 1/4 of it.
stay strong and remember to take some time for yourself...

[Countyfem]

Better night last night, Clay is getting some much needed sleep. They are planing on taking her off the epi today, everything else is going well as expected.

Thanks everyone for the feedback, I really appreciate it.

[1QuirkyKiwi]

Jo, please consider giving her whey protein isolate shakes. Whey isolate protein powder mixed with berries and soy milk for protein and calories. You can throw non dairy ice cream into the blender if she doesn't like it with just berries.

Whey inhibits cancer.

As does Spirulina and Red Algae powders added to the shakes.

[Tommi]

Better night last night, Clay is getting some much needed sleep. They are planing on taking her off the epi today, everything else is going well as expected.

Thanks everyone for the feedback, I really appreciate it.

Thanks for the news. Sleeping away the pain is a gooood thing. Keep your strength up. Don't forget to take care of you, for the days and nights ahead. :moonstars:

[Countyfem]

Private room, epi is out switched to morphine as he suspected the first was causing her nausea, she is more alert and I hope things continue to move forward, would hate to back-step.

[DapperButch]

Private room, epi is out switched to morphine as he suspected the first was causing her nausea, she is more alert and I hope things continue to move forward, would hate to back-step.

I had a private room and that made me much happier than I would have been in a double room. I was lucky my insurance allowed it, even though they charge you extra for it. I was able to do it because my mom said that she would pay for it, but for whatever reason, the hospital didn't charge me.

I just wasn't up for dealing with any stress around a roommate's (or her visitor's) homo/transphobia after having my gut cut open and 10 inches of my intestine removed.

[JustJo]

So...I just got my hands on the results of my mother's last CT scan....holy cow. :|

She's been keeping way too many secrets.