Dating a Trans Person (FTM)

Zora77 · 09-21-2010, 08:47 PM

A big THANK YOU to all of you for your insights and comments. It’s definitely food for thought and much appreciated! Also, great advice on joining a support group – which I will do once I mustered up some courage.

I think in parts I’m just very unsure of what to expect because I have seen so many changes in him already since we met about a year ago.

If he decides to take T, it looks like I’d have to deal with possible mood or even personality changes, being perceived as a straight couple, some hairy discussions and hey, if the sex drive would get any higher than it already is, I might have to take some myself to keep up

Not taking T, I imagine, must be even harder because you stake out your spot outside of the comfort zone of society and have to deal with constant confusion and possibly also hostility. I’m curious to learn more about how that route is traveled. I can imagine it sucks to be perceived and related to differently than you feel and want most of the time – and as the partner I would cringe and get upset when witnessing this kind of ignorance.

Part of me almost hopes he’ll take T – and in thinking that, I feel confronted with my own desire not to rock the boat or just fit in. But he is concerned about T being associated with a higher risk of cancer and I’d rather see him healthy and not fit in that accepting that risk.

No idea what will happen - but then again, who can ever know what to expect in any relationship anyway, right? And on some level I have always enjoyed challenging myself and others. Thanks again. It feels really good to hear that I’m not the only one thinking about these things.

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09-21-2010, 08:47 PM	#17
Zora77 Junior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Femme Preferred Pronoun?: She Join Date: May 2010 Location: San Francisco Posts: 58 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 72 Thanked 121 Times in 37 Posts Rep Power: 175636	A big THANK YOU to all of you for your insights and comments. It’s definitely food for thought and much appreciated! Also, great advice on joining a support group – which I will do once I mustered up some courage. I think in parts I’m just very unsure of what to expect because I have seen so many changes in him already since we met about a year ago. If he decides to take T, it looks like I’d have to deal with possible mood or even personality changes, being perceived as a straight couple, some hairy discussions and hey, if the sex drive would get any higher than it already is, I might have to take some myself to keep up Not taking T, I imagine, must be even harder because you stake out your spot outside of the comfort zone of society and have to deal with constant confusion and possibly also hostility. I’m curious to learn more about how that route is traveled. I can imagine it sucks to be perceived and related to differently than you feel and want most of the time – and as the partner I would cringe and get upset when witnessing this kind of ignorance. Part of me almost hopes he’ll take T – and in thinking that, I feel confronted with my own desire not to rock the boat or just fit in. But he is concerned about T being associated with a higher risk of cancer and I’d rather see him healthy and not fit in that accepting that risk. No idea what will happen - but then again, who can ever know what to expect in any relationship anyway, right? And on some level I have always enjoyed challenging myself and others. Thanks again. It feels really good to hear that I’m not the only one thinking about these things.