Long Distance Relationships

[Ciaran]

Originally Posted by thedivahrrrself

I know a couple who have lived like this, about a mile apart, for 14 years. It works very well for them. My friend Mel's parents also lived in separate houses for 20+ years until he died. It seems people can make almost any arrangement work if they love each other.

I've posted about this before on this site but the above type of arrangement would be my ideal relationship. I like intimacy with a partner and sharing our physical space - but I cannot do this 24/7. I need alone time and I need my own personal space too sometimes. Therefore, 24/7 would be very claustrophobic for me and, simply, I don't think it would work unless we at least had separate rooms in the same house in addition to shared space.


When I think back to the few 24/7 relationships I've had, I realise that I always had separate living arrangements in part. For example, when I moved in with my partner around 2001 or so, I kept my own condo and would sometimes spend the night there (it was closer to my office anyway).


The difficulty is that some / many people perceive the need for separate personal space as indicative of a lack of commitment - whereas, from my perspective, it's nothing of the sort. Rather, it's to preserve my sanity and actually strengthen the relationship.