only another butch would understand

[Tommi]

God Morning Jess, nice post.. I am on my way to Sears this am for some more Craftsman Love. My girl loves tools, but willingly and lovingly lets me do the fun stuff, cuz my she likes that suspender snapping peacock strutting way it makes us feel to do things.(take literally)

Wow..I am away for 24 hours and ...the butch world comes out form the shadows and starts burping..

My Mama woulda decked me had I done either, but that's beside the point. But my uncle's were allowed to have conteststs..anyway.

Haven't read all the posts, and won't ....but, here is what came to my mind when I saw the title on the front page this morning.

Only a Butch would understand, that nod we have for each other as we pass each other on the street, or in a restaurant.

Only a Butch would understand that glance she gives us in the mirror when she sees us smiling as she applies her lipstick.

Only a butch would understand, another butch

[Jett]

Originally Posted by Tommi

God Morning Jess, nice post.. I am on my way to Sears this am for some more Craftsman Love. My girl loves tools, but willingly and lovingly lets me do the fun stuff, cuz my she likes that suspender snapping peacock strutting way it makes us feel to do things.(take literally)

Wow..I am away for 24 hours and ...the butch world comes out form the shadows and starts burping..

My Mama woulda decked me had I done either, but that's beside the point. But my uncle's were allowed to have conteststs..anyway.

Haven't read all the posts, and won't ....but, here is what came to my mind when I saw the title on the front page this morning.

Only a Butch would understand, that nod we have for each other as we pass each other on the street, or in a restaurant.

Only a Butch would understand that glance she gives us in the mirror when she sees us smiling as she applies her lipstick.

Only a butch would understand, another butch

LOL... she always tilts her head at me, holds out the lipstick and smirking says ... "want some?"

[Mister Bent]

Originally Posted by BullDog

Great post Metro. I am not at all interested in perpetuating stereotypes, and you covered the issues very well.

I enjoyed your post as well Mister Bent, although I don't tend to bond with people over masculinity per se. As an example straight males are masculine too, and I find that I have very little in common with most of them. Masculinity may be a bonding element for some. For me, not so much. I have found that in other organizations and communities where it was supposed to be butch space but ends up being "masculine" space and butches- and in particular female and woman identified butches- tend to get erased and many false assumptions made. I do like bonding with a wide range of people and gender identities- but not at the expense of my gender identity when it is suppposed to be a place for my kind- just something to keep in mind for all.

Right. I probably could have worded that a little better, and I appreciate your post all around.

By bonding element I meant something more in the manner of what I said toward the end of my post, that "masculinity" doesn't belong solely to one group of masculine people and, further, that there is no "hierarchy" of masculinity with which to segregate (I hate that shit).

I, too, have seen incidents where female and woman identified butches have been "erased" or treated as "less than," which I find absurd and harmful. I no more want someone policing my identity, my "butchness" than I want to do so to another. And it does go both ways, which you've no doubt seen, wherein the male identity is criticized as not being what butch is, or not belonging in queer space. You've been around, you know the drill. Regardless, I personally try to honor, and am thankful for the long history of butch. I may be male identified, but butch is meaningful to me, and most evocative (to me), of who I am.

"Being butch" isn't something with which I automatically bond with others either, but the experiences that come of being butch - maybe. Real bonding comes from more than simply sharing a common thread.

[Darth Denkay]

This is so true Tommi - such a great gesture.

Originally Posted by Tommi

Only a Butch would understand, that nod we have for each other as we pass each other on the street, or in a restaurant.

[apretty]

Originally Posted by WicketWWarrick

This is so true Tommi - such a great gesture.

that probably is a butch + butch thing--i'm less likely to nod and much more apt to say: HI SAILOR!

(well, in my single days--a girl's gotta eat!)

[Queerasfck]

Originally Posted by apretty

that probably is a butch + butch thing--i'm less likely to nod and much more apt to say: HI SAILOR!

(well, in my single days--a girl's gotta eat!)

hmmmm, so maybe you really weren't really a virgin when we met

[apretty]

Originally Posted by EzeeTiger

hmmmm, so maybe you really weren't really a virgin when we met

ew yes i was/am!

[Tommi]

Originally Posted by WicketWWarrick

This is so true Tommi - such a great gesture.

Nodding to the BG WicketWWarrick

and to Metro, who likes what he sees..


So, Butch's let's see in ten words or less.

1. What age were you when you first said "I'm butch" ?

2. To whom, yourself included?

[Jett]

Originally Posted by Tommi

Nodding to the BG WicketWWarrick

and to Metro, who likes what he sees..


So, Butch's let's see in ten words or less.

1. What age were you when you first said "I'm butch" ?

2. To whom, yourself included?

I think it's a difficult question because the first time it was verbally acknowledged someone had said it to/about me first, that I was butch, and I don't think I've ever really said it to anyone in a informative type of context.

So I guess I acknowledged it, said it (the word) about myself internally after it being said to me at as a teenager (like 19 I think)...

Ok I think that's right around 10 words...

[Jess]

Originally Posted by Tommi

Nodding to the BG WicketWWarrick

and to Metro, who likes what he sees..


So, Butch's let's see in ten words or less.

1. What age were you when you first said "I'm butch" ?

2. To whom, yourself included?

Like Metro, it was said "about " me first.. in the second grade, by my babysitter's niece... "here comes my little butch" .. I went home and asked momma what it meant. She said it meant that babysitters niece was mean.
I don't think I truly embraced the term until I was around 35 and began seeking out folks who were also embracing it.

Sorry... that wasn't ten words or less... my girl says I practice "butch math" which means more bigger better harder faster.. LOL!

[Darth Denkay]

Knew I was butch (adjective) since pretty much forever.
Knew I was a butch (noun) when I first learned about the B-F community sometime in the late 90s.

Originally Posted by Tommi

So, Butch's let's see in ten words or less.

1. What age were you when you first said "I'm butch" ?

2. To whom, yourself included?[/B][/COLOR]

[Gryph]

Originally Posted by Tommi

Nodding to the BG WicketWWarrick

and to Metro, who likes what he sees..


So, Butch's let's see in ten words or less.

1. What age were you when you first said "I'm butch" ?

2. To whom, yourself included?

I was called a butch in junior high school, I didn't acknowledge it in myself until I was in my early 30's. After I had left an abusive marriage(yes to a bio-male) of 11years.
I still wasn't fully comfortable with being quite as male ID as I am even after my Two-Spirit vision, as I have been since my girl came into my life. She is the one who has brought out the male that I was hiding for so many years.

[Tommi]

Originally Posted by Tommi

Nodding to the BG WicketWWarrick

and to Metro, who likes what he sees..


So, Butch's let's see in ten words or less.

1. What age were you when you first said "I'm butch" ?

2. To whom, yourself included?

Originally Posted by Gryph

I was called a butch in junior high school, I didn't acknowledge it in myself until I was in my early 30's. After I had left an abusive marriage(yes to a bio-male) of 11years.
I still wasn't fully comfortable with being quite as male ID as I am even after my Two-Spirit vision, as I have been since my girl came into my life. She is the one who has brought out the male that I was hiding for so many years.

Yes, Gryph girl's will do that to you.

When I was in grade school , my dad would tease me and tell my friends I was queer... One day my uncle said..."Tommi is butch, get used to it". So, at 13 I told my 14 year old girlfriend I was Butch. She smiled and said, oh, good your not queer...and , it has been fun ever since..