The Strong Butch Female/Woman in a Patriarchal World

[BullDog]

Originally Posted by beau4afemme

I don't support the online hullabaloo surrounding butch identity, either. And yes, I don't believe butch needs to be qualified as female, either. And yes, it feels backward to me as well. (But I know you already know that.)

I've yet to post an ID that says "female ID butch" or "woman ID butch", instead opting for "bulldagger" because it historically describes a butch woman like myself.

The flack surrounding defaulting to male when speaking of butch in an online setting is what prompted my responses and concerns. However, I'm thrilled if that's no longer going to be an issue. I sort of doubt it, though.




First, Bully, see what I responded to Metropolis above.

Further, the sexism part is what has bothered me all along. The post I made a couple of days ago trying to isolate reasons behind that was meant to address what I believe some of the root causes are for the sexism many of us witness online. Until those things aren't in play or at issue, I don't see much changing for butches in this arena. I'm always hopeful, though.




Thank you for this, Apocalipstic. Perhaps your posts (as well as Wickedfemme's) are an indication that this discussion is useful and may change attitudes surrounding butches.

Again, I'm always hopeful.

Lastly, I'm really done with picking apart my gender. I hope this thread can progress to a discussion of how we, as butches, face the world as women and conquer the patriarchal society's narrow-minded bullshit and not merely the disheartening nonsense we often encounter online. Because, to me, that's where our true strength matters for our entire community.

I don't think of butch women speaking up as being part of online butch identity politics, but I do agree that using "identified" as part of describing butch can play into to it. There is no "war." From now on I will make it clear that I am Butch who is female and woman, but not "identified" anything.

I think we do still need to speak up about sexism when it occurs, but picking apart gender, yeah it's getting real old.

Yes talking about how butches face and deal with the world as strong females and women in a patriarchal world sounds a lot more empowering. One small thing that does make me smile is when kids are curious about me. Sometimes they will ask me if I am a boy or girl. I say girl. Some other kids just play with me and don't think about it one way or another. I'm just happy when kids see butches as part of the normal spectrum of people in this world and their lives.

[Apocalipstic]

Originally Posted by BullDog

I don't think of butch women speaking up as being part of online butch identity politics, but I do agree that using "identified" as part of describing butch can play into to it. There is no "war." From now on I will make it clear that I am Butch who is female and woman, but not "identified" anything.

I think we do still need to speak up about sexism when it occurs, but picking apart gender, yeah it's getting real old.

Yes talking about how butches face and deal with the world as strong females and women in a patriarchal world sounds a lot more empowering. One small thing that does make me smile is when kids are curious about me. Sometimes they will ask me if I am a boy or girl. I say girl. Some other kids just play with me and don't think about it one way or another. I'm just happy when kids see butches as part of the normal spectrum of people in this world and their lives.

My nephew calls Cynthia the "girl who looks like a boy". He loves her. When we go see them he runs in with his arms full of nerf guns and says "choose your weapon!". I get more of "wow Aunt Jenny, you aren't very good at video games...."

[AtLast]

Originally Posted by BullDog

I


I think we do still need to speak up about sexism when it occurs, but picking apart gender, yeah it's getting real old.

Yes talking about how butches face and deal with the world as strong females and women in a patriarchal world sounds a lot more empowering. One small thing that does make me smile is when kids are curious about me. Sometimes they will ask me if I am a boy or girl. I say girl. Some other kids just play with me and don't think about it one way or another. I'm just happy when kids see butches as part of the normal spectrum of people in this world and their lives.

These points hit the spot, Bully!!!

It is about sexism... it is not about gender!!! Gender is fluid and frankly, I am grateful that within my lifetime, gender ignorance is being fought. Not just for the TG/I, all Butches, Femmes.... all of us here, but for every human being. Sexism is the culprit I want to see erradicated.

Yes, when I am simply a human being among the masses, I am a happy camper! Just me, strong, female masculine woman living my life, being myself!

Yet, I do run into (as we all do) unique circumstances as a consequence of my female masculinity. I'm not as sensitive to much of this as I once was, but, there are times it just plain sux! I hate it that just in terms of safety, I will not take public transportaion when going to events/activities in which I am putting on the butch like wearing a tie or tux. And that i do a mental inventory about getting anything I need at the store before I get dressed to go, so I don't have to go into a store... dappered-up.[/But the fact of the matter is, my rapid transit route intersects with a city in which a butch was kidnapped and gang raped and I'm not taking chances. Having had quite a few instances in my life in which I was physically attacked (or just about to be) because of how I look, does influence my behavior and choices. And I live 25 minutes from SF! I have been harassed on BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) within the last few years. Verbal abuse is one thing... being beaten or raped is quite another!

[daisyfm]

Great thread! I thanked so many already!
My favorite part about butch women is that they are two things i like a lot: butch and women. period. two for one. the best of both worlds, the masculine and the feminine in perfect unison... music to my soul, my mind, etc, you get the picture. And when the part "woman" is rejected it is sad to me and I can understand it and respect it, yet I don't have to agree with certain things.
A lot of what is said here, and a lot of what happens in real time truly
makes me wonder why some people would want to fit in the binary system.
In my real time community I am seeing it a lot among both lesbian and trans groups. Nowadays everyone wants marriage and maybe children, and maybe a house, to live within the "binary security walls". Once upon a time, we were all outlaws and wanted to live as far away from the binary as possible. Go figure. Times change. I know that even if as a high femme I pass in the straight world I am NOT one of them for sure, I might never be in a binary system, I have lost jobs for being out (twice) and I don't want to be one of them either!
So yeah...what Butches have to deal with due to patriarchy is a lot. Period.
Even if they are out on a job, rarely do wives/partners get invited to corporate events, or picnics, and in other fields, there is much discrimination as well.