Unconditional Love... is it really unconditional?

[SassyLeo]

Originally Posted by hippieflowergirl

i think people are afraid to love unconditionally because loving unconditionally is hard...or because it sounds airyfairy and impossible. or worse...because of the inevitable pain involved in doing so.

being afraid of being hurt is a cop out. of course you're going to be hurt! you're in love with a human being arent you? who the hell are we to demand that no one hurt us? how can we tell people they have to be perfect when we havent managed it yet? i cannot understand the "you hurt me so now you're not trustworthy" mentality.

how anemic is the love that walks away when things get hard?

before you dust off your indignation...i'm not talking about domestic violence or choices that jeopardize safety. i'm talking about the human beings who fuck up, plain and simple, (and we ALL do it) and then find themselves suddenly single because the love they were part of couldnt hold up under pressure. it's anemic. that's the only word for it. anemic.

glass houses baby. glass houses.

"People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how perfect love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. That's honest. Give me that kind of love" Jim Morrison

Interesting when I read the part about being a "cop out", etc, I actually started thinking about how I have a hard time with the concept of being with someone forever. I've never been able to say it to anyone. Like "I will love you forever". I think it is unfair to promise "forever" and maybe "unconditional love". When I hear people say "we will be together forever", my gut reaction is not "woohoo, yay for you", it is more like: "right" *eyeroll*. Maybe I am cynic or a realist or whatever you want to call me... but I'm not sure I'm a subscriber. Life happens, people change, feelings change, etc. If I promise someone -forever- and then it turns out to be -forever for 5 years- there is this sense of having lied, or letting someone down or betrayal.

I'd rather say "I'm in *this* as long as we are happy and it *works*

People have told me that this school of thought is kind of like a "cop out"

Maybe it is...I'm on the fence.