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02-24-2014, 12:02 AM
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#1 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: NC & CO
Posts: 4,806
Thanks: 4,624
Thanked 12,196 Times in 3,779 Posts
Rep Power: 21474856   |
this is for paybacks baby...fun delightful painfully sweet pay backs...since *you* have never said THAT word to me before
(Scene: they are pulling an all nighter at work...I woke up from short nap now can't sleep)....
Texts: Them: I'm trying to read your emails but I'm on a ladder 18 feet up...not a good idea! Me: I'm gonna kick yer azz when you get down!!! Them:woooo hoo I like feisty turns me on Me: Then hope you can take feisty!! Them: Hey now you just made me drop my nail gun Me: I DID? *chuckles* Them: You just eat this up...making me stuble and stuff...dang you're sexy Me: grinz...possibly....sexy is empowering...  sexy is confidence...Them: ohh yeah and you're all in one package, what a treat, what a heartthrob...ohh my boner, grinz Them: let me hear your voice before you go to bed, like 5 minutes, you need sleep Me: (responding before I read the boner statement) Now stop letting me distract you so you'll be safe...call when you get a break... Me: (look on face .gif "Say What?") after seeing *boner* and reading their request to call) CALL METhem: I'm climbing down ladder, you gonna call me? They dial me...I pick up and calmly ask if they are ok? *Yes, why?* Me: You DID NOT JUST SAY BONER!!!!! They start laughing so hard I couldn't understand what they said....I start laughing with them, they stop long enough to do a sexy growl...I start laughing harder to where it makes me have a coughing fit!!! They're still laughing as they say OH MY GOD, I just drew a glass of water to offer you!! I can't believe I just did that!!! This made me laugh even harder...I sit up, coughing and laughing, scare my poor dog and he FALLS OFF THE BED, wedged between the wall and bed...rescued poor Willy ...I say " kinda like the first day you called me, and you popped a breath mint before I picked up??" I get wrapped up in their deep, gorgeous, fun belly laugh...I'm still coughing...I say "oh my god I need some tea"....their response "I'm sorry to choke you up baby!" (I could hear the naughty grin).... I retort back "if THAT'S not an innuendo!!!" All this laughing because of a boner!!! This was sooooo much fun in person!!! Wish I could have voice recorded it!! THIS TIME...I had no intention of *bleeping stuff out* to "protect the innocent"....not a chance!
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She has been through hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into a fire and smiles. ~E.Corona~ |
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02-24-2014, 11:36 PM
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#2 |
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Member
How Do You Identify?:
Soft butch Preferred Pronoun?:
whatever.. Relationship Status:
SINGLE 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Indiana
Posts: 226
Thanks: 1,215
Thanked 727 Times in 205 Posts
Rep Power: 3291561 |
While helping a friend move my phone rings I answer only to hear this soft voice saying aunt Barbie you gotta come get me right now.. Mommy isnt being nice & im over it..
While trying not to laugh I ask why is mommy not being nice.. I get a responce of "I want ice cream"..& mommy said no.. So u come get me & get me ice cream & ill stay the night @ ur house.. So hurry up I dont like waiting. I lost it & yes I did go get her & the ice cream also got her sister but took them home when ice cream kicked in good..
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Im just me thats it..
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02-25-2014, 11:35 AM
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#3 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Poetically versed to breathe only truth and bleed certainty Preferred Pronoun?:
Kane Relationship Status:
Married to Chefnaction 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Finally, home
Posts: 1,987
Thanks: 5,900
Thanked 4,735 Times in 1,583 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
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I need your grace To remind me To find my own |
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02-25-2014, 04:35 PM
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#4 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?:
She, as in 'She's a GEM' 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The roads are narrow here
Posts: 36,631
Thanks: 182,498
Thanked 107,972 Times in 25,664 Posts
Rep Power: 21474888 |
The owner of my salon with a customer. They were discussing where the customer's eyebrows should be drawn.
Customer: They are under my glasses. Owner: They are supposed to be there. Customer: What's the point of having them if they are hidden? Owner: It's where they go. It's natural. Customer: I want them here. *draws lines well above the top of her glasses* Owner: Now, come on. You don't want that! You'd look like a hookah.  They continue bickering with one another until the owner catches my eye and says, "Grandmuthaahs!" Then the grandmother said, "Now do them like this!" and drew two very curved lines on her forehead. Owner: I'm not turning you into a Bozo hookah! Now, stop it and go away. I love you and will see you later. Grandmother: I should pay you for this, right? Owner: Nah. You can't afford me. Just buy me a drink at the wedding. The two of them went on and on, back and forth, for a good ten minutes. North Eastern families. Gotta love 'em. |
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02-25-2014, 04:37 PM
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#5 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Queer..femme.. .babygirl...girl Preferred Pronoun?:
Female Ones... Relationship Status:
Enjoying life but ready to meet someone Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Portland Oregon
Posts: 3,945
Thanks: 12,015
Thanked 12,476 Times in 3,357 Posts
Rep Power: 21474855  |
Listening to book 2 of 39 clues... there are moments that I just bust out laughing... It really helps make my day go by fast at work
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Previously known as MidnightBlueEyes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ http://gailsforum.files.wordpress.co...-psd340941.png |
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02-25-2014, 11:26 PM
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#6 |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Femm Preferred Pronoun?:
She Relationship Status:
**loved by many** 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Closer to the waves
Posts: 15,372
Thanks: 29,104
Thanked 40,932 Times in 10,724 Posts
Rep Power: 21474864 |
Watching Jimmy Fallon try on Shaquille O'Neal's suit jacket. He is one big guy! I laughed so loud, I scared the fur babies.
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 kissesA kiss is a whisper in your mouth. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise to give it back. |
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03-11-2014, 07:22 PM
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#7 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
TG Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am! 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 5,501
Thanks: 9,855
Thanked 14,415 Times in 4,058 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
that little Christmas Elf
text conversation..............
Mom.....JBH just called me, she says the Christmas Elf has stuck a rubber band up her nose. You can imagine my laughter at this point Me...Oh Lordy Mom....She says she has used tweezers and can't get it out Me...Tell her to make her blow her nose Mom...Well yeah...only she sniffed instead. Now she can't see it. I have now suggested she use a suction bulb like when she was a baby. Me....Google it...how to remove a rubber band from a child's nose
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Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it. |
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03-16-2014, 12:40 AM
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#8 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
TG Preferred Pronoun?:
He Relationship Status:
once in a while someone amazing comes along...and here I am!
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Down on the farm
Posts: 5,501
Thanks: 9,855
Thanked 14,415 Times in 4,058 Posts
Rep Power: 21474857 |
Text Convo
Mom...your favorite TV show would have been 50 this month....guess
me...Mom did they make TVs when I was 1? Mom...yes Me..Did we have a TV when I was 1 Mom..yes a tiny one Me...I'm guessing Rawhide or something cowboyish Mom...NOPE "FLIPPER" Mom...Oh and in 64 you were 2 Me...Not until September I wasn't
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Yeah so what if I'm triple dipped in awesome sauce? The best way to predict the future, is to create it. |
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| The Following User Says Thank You to Blade For This Useful Post: |
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03-16-2014, 09:50 AM
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#9 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
With my drivers Lic. Preferred Pronoun?:
Gentleman.. Depends on the Situation. Relationship Status:
Last Rodeo, what a ride, many sunrises & sunsets to be had... Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: where a realtor had me sign the dotted line
Posts: 1,901
Thanks: 6,466
Thanked 5,457 Times in 1,450 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
Walking outside to retrieve something out of my truck.. And my neighbor waving up a storm and yelling good morning. I wave back and lean into my truck to search for my paper work.
Neighbor yells to me, Hey Blaze? I wanna know where you got those cool looking shorts from? I think my husband will like those, they look comfortable! I look down and turn beat red... Umm ahhh well Ma'am, as I slowly cover the front of as much of my BOXERS as possible, I umm got them from American Eagle and they may still have some... Thank you Ma"am have a wonderful day! I really need to be more vigilant and aware about my shorts lmao |
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03-16-2014, 10:10 AM
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#10 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Femme lesbian Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: East coast
Posts: 2,416
Thanks: 5,829
Thanked 12,298 Times in 2,057 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852 |
I woke up about 4 this morning and couldn't get back to sleep, so I watched cable a while, and caught this show called Gigolos.
Oh. My. God. I was laughing out loud. Those guys are D-U-M-B. But nice. Guess you had to be there.
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Reach out. |
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03-28-2014, 02:23 PM
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#11 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Stone Butch Preferred Pronoun?:
Respectful and situational appropriate ones Relationship Status:
Enjoying butchelorhood
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 3,301
Thanks: 7,390
Thanked 4,380 Times in 1,233 Posts
Rep Power: 21474852 |
A hilarious, and somewhat risqué, conversation that began innocently enough with a very sweet sentiment. We were both laughing so hard we were wiping tears from our eyes. I adore the femmes in my life that have no qualms about saying what's on their mind.
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Don't try to explain yourself to stupid people. You're not the jackass whisperer. |
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04-25-2014, 05:45 AM
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#12 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you. 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
Posts: 7,660
Thanks: 15,225
Thanked 27,595 Times in 6,955 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
my little Lizzie bug....
We were talking about things that would be good for her apartment for cooking.... I suggested a crock pot...and she said "I think I really want one of those Gary Coleman grills!!" After I stopped laughing...I had to tell her she meant "George Foreman". Liz being Liz...she was all..."isn't that what I said??" That's my baby.... <3
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04-25-2014, 07:41 AM
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#13 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
with a distinct flair 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: somewhere else
Posts: 1,852
Thanks: 7,623
Thanked 4,388 Times in 1,009 Posts
Rep Power: 21474853 |
Hahahaha; this is so true!
Subject: Password
Please enter your new password: "cabbage" Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters. "boiled cabbage" Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character. "1 boiled cabbage" Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces. "50bloodyboiledcabbages" Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character. "50BLOODYboiledcabbages" Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively. "50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAss,IfYouDon'tG iveMeAccessNow” Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation. ”ReallyPissedOff50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYour AssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow" Sorry, that password is already in use. Last edited by Smiling; 04-25-2014 at 07:52 AM. Reason: Just imagine there is no blank space in the last 2 passwords because I'm currently losing the battle with my iPad! :) |
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05-08-2014, 07:19 PM
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#14 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you.
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
Posts: 7,660
Thanks: 15,225
Thanked 27,595 Times in 6,955 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
the latest commercial for hotels.com....
Im a sucker for imaginative ads....and when they include dark humor....its even gooder....
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05-08-2014, 07:50 PM
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#15 | |
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Practically Lives Here
How Do You Identify?:
Queer Stone Femme Girl of the Unicorn Variety Preferred Pronoun?:
She, as in 'She's a GEM'
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: The roads are narrow here
Posts: 36,631
Thanks: 182,498
Thanked 107,972 Times in 25,664 Posts
Rep Power: 21474888 |
Quote:
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05-26-2014, 08:24 AM
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#16 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you.
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
Posts: 7,660
Thanks: 15,225
Thanked 27,595 Times in 6,955 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
I caught the end of the movie Drop Dead Gorgeous....
Its definitely dark humor...which appeals to me....lol
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05-29-2014, 05:15 PM
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#17 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you.
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
Posts: 7,660
Thanks: 15,225
Thanked 27,595 Times in 6,955 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
my mother's dog....trying to bark with a ball in her mouth....lol
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06-17-2014, 01:18 PM
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#18 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you.
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
Posts: 7,660
Thanks: 15,225
Thanked 27,595 Times in 6,955 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
my knitting lady/ client....
she was telling me about her friend at church and how she sits in the front pew with all her grandchildren each week.... I told her my (childhood) theory that thr REALLY good people sit in the front because they arent afraid for god to see them... She paused and looked down and said.... "Well....I dont sit in the front pew...." Then she looked at me with twinkling eyes and we both just guffawed about that.....Im still chuckling even now....
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06-18-2014, 04:06 PM
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#19 |
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?:
cleverly disguised as a responsible adult* Preferred Pronoun?:
wild woman Relationship Status:
No, thank you.
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Home in NC..gonna dig in like a tick this time…
Posts: 7,660
Thanks: 15,225
Thanked 27,595 Times in 6,955 Posts
Rep Power: 21474859 |
my mothers pit bull pup....
she's discovered bugs! Now she spends heaps of her outside time looking at the ground.....ears perked...snuffing the grass here and there....lol Its the cutest thing ever.... I keep waiting for her to hear a Who....
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06-24-2014, 10:19 PM
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#20 |
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Senior Member
How Do You Identify?:
Queer..femme.. .babygirl...girl Preferred Pronoun?:
Female Ones... Relationship Status:
Enjoying life but ready to meet someone Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Portland Oregon
Posts: 3,945
Thanks: 12,015
Thanked 12,476 Times in 3,357 Posts
Rep Power: 21474855 |
Watching Riley and Peppa run laps through the house going between my roomate and I
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Previously known as MidnightBlueEyes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ http://gailsforum.files.wordpress.co...-psd340941.png |
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Hybrid Mode
