Reactions to Embracing Your Femme(ness)

thedivahrrrself · 08-20-2012, 08:49 PM

For me, I started glittering about age 16. My mother is not very girly. She jokes that if it didn't sparkle or you couldn't pet it, I wouldn't wear it.

I came out at 17, and she was confused. I didn't help that much by dating a guy trying to "make sure" I was gay. Someone, I'm sure it was a gay man, slapped the label "femme" on me. It fit, and I was convinced I was some kind rebel, defying stereotypes. And I didn't want to date a stereotype, no! I would like femme girls, I decided. Until I met a charming (I use that term loosely, I was 19.) butch with gorgeous eyes.

We slept together and the way we did it felt so natural. Since then, it's been only Butch women for me.

I hated it when lesbians asked if I was straight when I was clearly in the dyke bar. I hate it when people ask who I'm there to support at Pride. I hate the backhanded compliment of "you don't look like a lesbian". My first instinct says Who the fuck are you to tell me what a lesbian looks like? But I say, "you don't look like a straight dude."

I'm a femme. I glitter. I like attention. I don't like feeling invisible.

08-20-2012, 08:49 PM	#11
thedivahrrrself Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Queer Sapiosexual Femme Relationship Status: Mrs. Grumpy Cat Tournaments Won: 4 Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: 8,660 feet high in the Andes Posts: 2,640 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 10,519 Thanked 11,655 Times in 2,291 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	For me, I started glittering about age 16. My mother is not very girly. She jokes that if it didn't sparkle or you couldn't pet it, I wouldn't wear it. I came out at 17, and she was confused. I didn't help that much by dating a guy trying to "make sure" I was gay. Someone, I'm sure it was a gay man, slapped the label "femme" on me. It fit, and I was convinced I was some kind rebel, defying stereotypes. And I didn't want to date a stereotype, no! I would like femme girls, I decided. Until I met a charming (I use that term loosely, I was 19.) butch with gorgeous eyes. We slept together and the way we did it felt so natural. Since then, it's been only Butch women for me. I hated it when lesbians asked if I was straight when I was clearly in the dyke bar. I hate it when people ask who I'm there to support at Pride. I hate the backhanded compliment of "you don't look like a lesbian". My first instinct says Who the fuck are you to tell me what a lesbian looks like? But I say, "you don't look like a straight dude." I'm a femme. I glitter. I like attention. I don't like feeling invisible. __________________ Small business owners around the world use microfinance to help expand their businesses and provide for their families. You can help! Click here to learn about Kiva.