Ask a trans person!

[Linus]

The got married out of Province and they are now divorced. It'll take another 4-8 weeks (it's already getting annoying that I've had to wait this long -- nearly a year now). Additionally, its annoying that she's even on the BC.

[Linus]

Welp. Even though my dad won't speak to me, my aunt (my dad's sister) still does. And she looked up my grandfather's ancestry project, finding my step-mom's maiden name (spelling may not be totally accurate but.. ). It's a start!

[CamBAMF]

Hey Everybody!
I haven't been on in a while but I had a some what funny experience. When I started T a year ago I was working on my college campus. I didn't work over the winter, so this summer is the first time since beginning T that I had to look for a job. I got a part time job for the summer with the help of an ex-girlfriend. I haven't had a name change yet (I've just been strapped for cash) and all my documents say female. So right off the bat I told my managers what my deal was, all were okay if not a little curious, however policy for this particular establishment says I have to wear a name tag wit my birth name. Not a big deal, I work in the back and besides I'm not ashamed. So the other day I stop in to fill out a request off form and an employee I never met walks up and introduces herself. I tell her my birth name (figuering that's how people in here know me). Today she happened to be working the same shift as me and she explained that she was totally flabergasted by my name and had called up an ex-girlfriend of hers (who apparently is also transitioning) and explained that she honestly had no idea. I really wasn't too worried about finding a job, but I am totally surprised all the time by the overwhelming acceptance. It's been a pretty cool experience!

[The Oopster]

Originally Posted by CamBAMF

Hey Everybody!
I haven't been on in a while but I had a some what funny experience. When I started T a year ago I was working on my college campus. I didn't work over the winter, so this summer is the first time since beginning T that I had to look for a job. I got a part time job for the summer with the help of an ex-girlfriend. I haven't had a name change yet (I've just been strapped for cash) and all my documents say female. So right off the bat I told my managers what my deal was, all were okay if not a little curious, however policy for this particular establishment says I have to wear a name tag wit my birth name. Not a big deal, I work in the back and besides I'm not ashamed. So the other day I stop in to fill out a request off form and an employee I never met walks up and introduces herself. I tell her my birth name (figuering that's how people in here know me). Today she happened to be working the same shift as me and she explained that she was totally flabergasted by my name and had called up an ex-girlfriend of hers (who apparently is also transitioning) and explained that she honestly had no idea. I really wasn't too worried about finding a job, but I am totally surprised all the time by the overwhelming acceptance. It's been a pretty cool experience!

I have to present my drivers liscence all the time which still has the original gender marker and my birth name. Nobody every seems to even notice the F marker .. they just think my parents were cruel. I think my birth name is unique enough that they think it's Like some foreign name that can go both ways. I've even had them comment "oh you poor thing" to be given "that" name. Unless it's an over the phone thing .. they still call me sir. On the phone they are extra confused but don't have the visual to go by ... it's funny cause it's like they over emphasize ms. then.

[Gentle Tiger]

Hello Everyone. I've had some experiences since transitioning that I quite frankly while I thought I was prepared I clearly was not prepared for them. I kind of wish I had had an older transman of color (not necessarily in age) to tell me a few things in advance - not that I would have changed my mind but to prepare me, talk through them. I don't mean about trivial things like hair growing in odd places, or receding hairlines. I'm talking heavy things like what it really means to be a man in the world. How you will be perceived and treated; respected and disrespected, etc. after you transition.

Anybody else have experiences after transitioning that kind of made you have to regroup so to speak?

[Greyson]

Originally Posted by Gentle Tiger

Hello Everyone. I've had some experiences since transitioning that I quite frankly while I thought I was prepared I clearly was not prepared for them. I kind of wish I had had an older transman of color (not necessarily in age) to tell me a few things in advance - not that I would have changed my mind but to prepare me, talk through them. I don't mean about trivial things like hair growing in odd places, or receding hairlines. I'm talking heavy things like what it really means to be a man in the world. How you will be perceived and treated; respected and disrespected, etc. after you transition.

Anybody else have experiences after transitioning that kind of made you have to regroup so to speak?

Gentle Tiger, First, I want you to know, you are not alone. I recently attended a Queer 12 Step Conference and was one of the two panel members that spoke about Transitioning. Two POC Transmen came up afterwards to speak to me about the very same sort of things you posted. I too am a POC and it has been my experience that a Latino male is sometimes treated much differently than a female Latina. I realized this as a young child just watching the life experiences of my father, stepfather and brothers.

I don't believe I have been living in the world as a Transman as long as you have but I do have a lifetime of being perceived as a Latino man off and on. If you want to talk more of this, pm me. Thank you for bringing this reality to the attention of your fellow Trans brothers.

[Gentle Tiger]

Originally Posted by Greyson

Gentle Tiger, First, I want you to know, you are not alone. I recently attended a Queer 12 Step Conference and was one of the two panel members that spoke about Transitioning. Two POC Transmen came up afterwards to speak to me about the very same sort of things you posted. I too am a POC and it has been my experience that a Latino male is sometimes treated much differently than a female Latina. I realized this as a young child just watching the life experiences of my father, stepfather and brothers.

I don't believe I have been living in the world as a Transman as long as you have but I do have a lifetime of being perceived as a Latino man off and on. If you want to talk more of this, pm me. Thank you for bringing this reality to the attention of your fellow Trans brothers.

Hey Greyson,

Yes indeed it is different. I had already experienced the being watched when entering an expensive as a black female. And I knew what in a factual and feeling for and with those who told their stories. But I now there is another layer because I now I am actually living the experience myself in my skin.

I definitely know I'm not alone as I hear this from time to time talking with other guys. My latest encounter caused me to think about the communities I interact with and share there. So others would know and not be surprised if they had similar experiences.

Hold your heads up Brothers.
Malcolm

[The Oopster]

Originally Posted by Gentle Tiger

Hello Everyone. I've had some experiences since transitioning that I quite frankly while I thought I was prepared I clearly was not prepared for them. I kind of wish I had had an older transman of color (not necessarily in age) to tell me a few things in advance - not that I would have changed my mind but to prepare me, talk through them. I don't mean about trivial things like hair growing in odd places, or receding hairlines. I'm talking heavy things like what it really means to be a man in the world. How you will be perceived and treated; respected and disrespected, etc. after you transition.

Anybody else have experiences after transitioning that kind of made you have to regroup so to speak?

Hey Malcolm great to see you! Sorry that you have had some uncomfortable experiences as of late.

I think it is one thing to know that certain things exist and another to experience them. Sometimes I think all the knowledge in the world will prepare me but once I experience something for the first time I realize that nothing could prepare me.

I can't begin to know what it is like to be a male poc, however I have had experiences since my transition that throw me for a loop, are uncomfortable, and sometimes still are.

When i was perceived as female at night I was always cautious and if there was a man around extremely intentive of the fact and aware of my surroundings. It's still uncomfortable to now be the one perceived as a possible threat/danger. It's weird having to be concious of how my behavior in certain instances is now perceived totally different now that I'm seen as male instead of female.

Other examples include interacting with kids. I'm a huge flirt with kids and when I was perceived as female it never alerted anybodys "red" flags. Now that i'm seen as male people are more cautious.

I'm a messenger and often sit in my car waiting for the next job to come. Sometimes it's in residential areas and I'm still waiting for someone to call the cops thinking i'm a potential perpertrator.

A lot of these behaviors are understandable, in fact i've been the one of caution, but it's totally different to now be perceived as the one that could be a potential threat.

[Linus]

I just checked online and apparently my Birth Certificate has finally been approved and is on its way!! FINALLY! Now I can go for the SIN card and Passport. Hopefully they will be quicker!