View Full Version : Randomly Posting Stuff Cause You Feel Like It
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Audism
My "favorite" form of Audism is when someone talks to me, and doesn't bother letting me read their lips, when I ask for clarification, or for them to stop turning away {or stop eating}, I will usually witness a familiar body language followed by a wave of their hand while saying "Never mind"....About 85....95% of the time, this will successfully tick me off, that person is basically telling me they can't be bothered with helping me understand.
If I'm in a snarky mood, I'll return the favor.
Enchantress
05-27-2010, 12:28 AM
It's 2:30 in the morning. The South is odd. It's all wet and sticky, even at night. I'm tired (and very hungry). But all I've got is ice from the vending machine and a wee bit of bottled water left. Oh yeah, and this wifi that's being so sweetly provided by the hotel. Good Lord, I'm rambling. Too many thoughts, not enough space in the virutal universe to put them down...
Sleep perhaps?
'O' to quiet a rather loud mind
I was watching Ellen today. With her new look, she bore an uncanny resemblence to Cloris Leachman when she was in Facts of Life. Anyone else notice that or should I schedule an eye exam?
:fan:
"feels like 88".....
bulllshit....feels like fuggin wadi rum ~sits in front of a/c....
BestButchBoy
05-27-2010, 04:15 PM
Make a hipster’s day. Donate old clothes to Goodwill.
theyre actually doing an abc tribute to matt damon?i did like oceans 11...12....13...Bourne series was kewl, but u can stretch amnesia only so much..i wonder if they'll touch the sarah silverman thing
:blink:
Enchantress
05-27-2010, 08:33 PM
There are very large bugs here. Spiders and other prehistoric, slow moving crawlies. This is not a good thing.
Gemme
05-27-2010, 08:36 PM
There are very large bugs here. Spiders and other prehistoric, slow moving crawlies. This is not a good thing.
Welcome to the South. Keep an eye out. Some of them fly.
I've seen flying Roaches.....Ugly....sleep with a skeeter net, less worry about creepy crawlies landing on your tongue....
Btw, what's the fuckin point of paying for 2nd day delivery ON WEDS. if fedex estimates my stuff will arrive TUESDAY ?!?!?!........i feel so gyped
Write14u
05-27-2010, 08:58 PM
There are very large bugs here. Spiders and other prehistoric, slow moving crawlies. This is not a good thing.
Welcome to the South. Keep an eye out. Some of them fly.
Yeah, those flying ones are rough. And stay out of the chiggers!
Gemme
05-27-2010, 09:06 PM
Yeah, those flying ones are rough. And stay out of the chiggers!
*mumbles something about hitting the enter button too fast on reps*
You're not kidding! I got into some of those lil bastids once. Once! Oh, my. Never again, if there is a God. Never again. I nearly scratched my ankle to the bone!
Gemme
05-27-2010, 09:08 PM
In other news, my fingernails are too long and I must cut them tonight or tomorrow. :blink:
Enchantress
05-27-2010, 09:40 PM
Welcome to the South. Keep an eye out. Some of them fly.
Oh.Sweet.Jesus.
(I thought I'd use this as all I've seen since I arrived are "Jesus Saves" and "Jesus Loves You" signs)
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
Pretty Woman
05-27-2010, 09:42 PM
Oh.Sweet.Jesus.
(I thought I'd use this as all I've seen since I arrived are "Jesus Saves" and "Jesus Loves You" signs)
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
Wait 'til you see the 'In case of rapture this car will be unmanned' stickers. And honestly, there is something wrong with that IMHO.
Gemme
05-27-2010, 09:44 PM
Oh.Sweet.Jesus.
(I thought I'd use this as all I've seen since I arrived are "Jesus Saves" and "Jesus Loves You" signs)
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
You can try "Sweet Baby Jesussssss" (remember to draw out the s) for variety.
Enchantress
05-27-2010, 09:46 PM
Wait 'til you see the 'In case of rapture this car will be unmanned' stickers. And honestly, there is something wrong with that IMHO.
Seriously the only *Rapture* I'm interested in is:
vf-g-srqKwg
However, with that said, I think it would be fun to see all the *pure* people rise up, ala 'Logan's Run" ...
Enchantress
05-27-2010, 09:49 PM
You can try "Sweet Baby Jesussssss" (remember to draw out the s) for variety.
Personally I don't have a thing against 'Jesus'. I'm very spiritual. However, what I do have an issue with is the atmosphere of purity and holier than thou. I don't know a single Butch woman or guy who would be able to walk through this part of the state without the possibility of trouble. It's actually a bit upsetting to me.
Oh and I like to draw out the 'sweeeeeet' part of the phrase. Ha!
Gemme
05-27-2010, 09:54 PM
Personally I don't have a thing against 'Jesus'. I'm very spiritual. However, what I do have an issue with is the atmosphere of purity and holier than thou. I don't know a single Butch woman or guy who would be able to walk through this part of the state without the possibility of trouble. It's actually a bit upsetting to me.
Oh and I like to draw out the 'sweeeeeet' part of the phrase. Ha!
Our butches and Transguys do have a more difficult time in the South. Unfortunately, the South is a couple of decades behind the rest of the world. This is being said by a born and raised Southern girl, before anyone gets their knickers in a bunch.
I like it that way too. Doing a double drawl is fun too.
Enchantress
05-27-2010, 10:00 PM
Our butches and Transguys do have a more difficult time in the South. Unfortunately, the South is a couple of decades behind the rest of the world. This is being said by a born and raised Southern girl, before anyone gets their knickers in a bunch.
I like it that way too. Doing a double drawl is fun too.
Oh, I have no doubt your drawl is delightful, Miss Gemme. ; )
Gemme
05-27-2010, 10:18 PM
Oh, I have no doubt your drawl is delightful, Miss Gemme. ; )
Not right now, unfortunately. I'm a vocal assimilator. I pick up the vocal patterns of those who speak around me. Sometimes folks think I'm making fun of them, but I'm not. It's automatic. It would be good for broadcasting, I suppose, but I miss my accent. It does come back when I speak with my family that's still down South, though.
My accent will be in full force by the end of the summer! :clap:
Softly
05-27-2010, 10:55 PM
Seriously the only *Rapture* I'm interested in is:
vf-g-srqKwg
awesome song! this boy I had a crush on in my early 20s introduced me to it and it's been in my music collection since!
my random:
it's almost 1am and I am eating a tuna fish sandwich and drinking iced coffee.
:duck:
TenderKnight
05-27-2010, 11:40 PM
Remember when.. On the other site, there was a thread about posting cleavage.. and everybody did..? *la sigh*
And remember when.. On the other site.. All the butches/guys where posting crotch shots? *even me*??
Sometimes I just miss the good ole days..
TenderKnight
05-27-2010, 11:51 PM
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AtLast
05-28-2010, 12:39 AM
My entire body hurts.... PHOOEY
Random complaint.... I need ice cream....
Gayla
05-28-2010, 02:14 AM
Remember when.. On the other site, there was a thread about posting cleavage.. and everybody did..? *la sigh*
And remember when.. On the other site.. All the butches/guys where posting crotch shots? *even me*??
Sometimes I just miss the good ole days..
I think I had one of the original boobatars and I kept that damn thing up forever because I'm so bad with the user pic thing. Then I used it again when I came back to visit for awhile. I have no idea where that pic is. Might be on a flash drive somewhere or could be gone forever.
Sometimes I miss those days, too.
cinderella
05-28-2010, 04:38 AM
It is 6:30a.m. EST, and this is the first time I have been unable to sleep at all. I have had trouble sleeping for years, but this time not even one minute. Why? I have tinnitus - really bad. Instead of ringing, I have a hissing sound. Sounds like cicadias (sp?) - those bugs that make that loud noise in the night...well, that's what I hear 24/7 with no let-up. Some times are worse then others, and last night - and now as I write this - it is a hissing nightmare! So loud I have trouble hearing. I can't stand it any longer. I am sooooo sleepy, but can't sleep.
I have heard of a product (there's really no cure for this, but I'm desperate) called Quitus. I'm going to call and order it right now - I just can't live like this anymore. For whatever reason, it is excrutiating now, and last night!!! If I could only sleep for one hour, I'd be happy....
I know it's a ridiculous idea (I'm sometimes known for those), but there is a large part of me that wants to see Tony Hayward, BP CEO, interviewed with a hard hat on, sweaty and covered with grime and oil, sitting in the boat of a Louisiana fisherman..........
Get your hands dirty, you bastid.
NJFemmie
05-28-2010, 07:05 AM
I know it's a ridiculous idea (I'm sometimes known for those), but there is a large part of me that wants to see Tony Hayward, BP CEO, interviewed with a hard hat on, sweaty and covered with grime and oil, sitting in the boat of a Louisiana fisherman..........
Get your hands dirty, you bastid.
This has now become worse than Exxon-Valdez, and would you believe that Exxon STILL hasn't fully paid the restitution to Alaska? In fact, they have appealed in court to try to get out of paying the rest of it. Instead of paying the $5B in fines, they settled for $507M. Bastards. I will not use an Exxon gas station for the fact that they never owned up to their responsibility and actions - and the fact they are blatantly anti-gay.
When all is said and done, I'm curious to see how BP gets fined, and how they are going to skirt around that.
Enchantress
05-28-2010, 07:15 AM
It's 9:15 am but really it's 6:15 am. I was up at 7:00 am but really and truly it was 4:00.
Andrew, Jr.
05-28-2010, 08:26 AM
I am so upset over this oil leak. People backing out of what they said 28 days ago, or so. I mean come on. Just say it how it is, you fucked up. Take responsibility. Sheesh.
Diva is right about getting dirty. Tony Hayward needs to be on a fishing boat covered in oil trying to clean up his mess.
My thinking only...Tony Hayward = Coward
diamondrose
05-28-2010, 08:49 AM
I don't like poping gum
foxyshaman
05-28-2010, 09:38 AM
I need a coffee.
Then I need to look like I am working so that I can 'work' :reader: on something else...I am a bad worker bee today .........okay leaving for coffee now...
Andrew, Jr.
05-28-2010, 11:09 AM
It was just on the news that Gary Coleman suffered an intercranial bleed (from a seizure of some sort possibly) and was found unconscious. He is in a Utah hospital on life support and in a coma. It doesn't look good. His family is asking the public for prayers. Coleman is listed as in critical condition.
Andrew, Jr.
05-28-2010, 01:13 PM
It was just released to the media. RIP Gary. I hope you find your peace.
Namaste,
Andrew
I was wondering why the furkids were at my feet at every step I took.
A bad storm rolled in just minutes later and then I understood. I knew if I lay across my bed they would both jump on the bed with me.
I put my arms around them and held close to me as we lay there listening.
When the storm was over I heard deep breathing, I looked and they were both sound asleep.
TenderKnight
05-28-2010, 02:55 PM
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BestButchBoy
05-28-2010, 03:22 PM
http://www.hamptons.com/live_view.php?camID=1
Cooper's Beach . Southampton
[Camera seems like it must have lost track of time, but you get the idea, yes?]
Truly beautiful beaches in the Hamptons! And, great lobster rolls. Just sayin'.
TenderKnight
05-28-2010, 04:05 PM
I just found the "Lesbian Zone".. What a GREAT friggin idea! Thank you to whatever Mod created that.. Is it new, or have I just been wearing my blinders?
Friggin good idea.. I wanna give someone a friggin hug and maybe a pull and a yank, if they are into it..
Enchantress
05-28-2010, 11:03 PM
I watched my beautiful niece graduate from highschool tonight. It was one of the proudest moments I've ever felt. She was beautiful, elegant, poised and delightfully divine. This evening has been worth the past three days, humid weather, too many trips to Walmart and all the big Georgia bugs.
I am so proud!
So I rec'd a "group forward" email recently...a "joke" about Muslims....and I responded to the group, saying I found it inappropriate....(paraphrased, but I was cordial and made my point about grouping ALL Muslims being a not-so-good thing...just like all priests weren't pedophiles, etc.)
So this morning, I got an email from one of the 'group' (I don't know this person) who said "Oh my god. Get off your high horse it was a joke." (Yeah....I could have really gone off about her punctuation.....)
Was I wrong to be offended by, what *I* felt was a racist-based "joke"?
Where does it END? Sheesh.
BestButchBoy
05-29-2010, 05:05 AM
http://www.pop-bar.com/
How good is that?
Random
05-29-2010, 05:36 AM
So I rec'd a "group forward" email recently...a "joke" about Muslims....and I responded to the group, saying I found it inappropriate....(paraphrased, but I was cordial and made my point about grouping ALL Muslims being a not-so-good thing...just like all priests weren't pedophiles, etc.)
So this morning, I got an email from one of the 'group' (I don't know this person) who said "Oh my god. Get off your high horse it was a joke." (Yeah....I could have really gone off about her punctuation.....)
Was I wrong to be offended by, what *I* felt was a racist-based "joke"?
Where does it END? Sheesh.
No sweety...
Any more... any kind of joke of that kind squigs me out... there is this loud blond comedian who makes fun of everyone in a very racist/sexist/classest way and I can't even watch her...
(paraphrased, but I was cordial and made my point about grouping ALL Muslims being a not-so-good thing...just like all priests weren't pedophiles, etc
I asked a priest how he felt about the scandals when this initially broke a few years back. He said, "Our Lord is cleaning out the deadwood." This hurts me as a Catholic; I wasn't raised with any of it. So I appreciate this comment.
In Puerto Rico the most common sweet bread is called Mallorca, a sweet light pastry in the shape of a little round coil. You can find this pastry pretty much anywhere here, but one of the places most famous for its mallorca is called La Bombonera. It has been open since 1902 and serves delicious mallorca and café con leche (coffee with milk) along with other traditional Puerto Rican dishes. It’s been serving Puerto Rico for over 100 years, so yes, it's that good, and criminal not to stop by. After passing the front window display filled with all the yummy pastries they offer, you go inside and see a long bar with old red cushioned bar chairs and behind the bar is their huge stainless steel espresso machine that is the same one they have been using since the restaurant opened. The place is always filled with both locals on their lunch breaks and sun burnt tourists trying out Puerto Rican food for the first time. It’s a fun place to be and the wait staff is always very friendly and super speedy.
One of the favorite items to order at La Bombonera is their mallorca with a café con leche in the morning, or a mallorca panini, that they make by slicing open the mallorca and putting cheese and ham inside and grilling it in a panini press and sprinkling it with powdered sugar. This little sandwich isn’t even on the menu, you have to have Insider info about this lil delicious treat {Hiya !!}, my mother took us to this place when we first arrived, I've been going back ever since, such memories, such flavors !!! :tongue:
BestButchBoy
05-29-2010, 03:35 PM
Know when to break the rules.
Write14u
05-29-2010, 04:13 PM
*mumbles something about hitting the enter button too fast on reps*
You're not kidding! I got into some of those lil bastids once. Once! Oh, my. Never again, if there is a God. Never again. I nearly scratched my ankle to the bone!
Heh...yeah, I've gotten into the bushes and the chiggers before. Worse than chicken pox, etc. Man, it's brutal! (and yeah, I noticed that premature button pushing!) *grin*
Oh.Sweet.Jesus.
(I thought I'd use this as all I've seen since I arrived are "Jesus Saves" and "Jesus Loves You" signs)
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
Wait 'til you see the 'In case of rapture this car will be unmanned' stickers. And honestly, there is something wrong with that IMHO.
Personally I don't have a thing against 'Jesus'. I'm very spiritual. However, what I do have an issue with is the atmosphere of purity and holier than thou. I don't know a single Butch woman or guy who would be able to walk through this part of the state without the possibility of trouble. It's actually a bit upsetting to me.
Oh and I like to draw out the 'sweeeeeet' part of the phrase. Ha!
I'm so used to that stuff it never even registers anymore. It can be interesting as a butch down here, but it's not that bad. Well, it's gotten some better. I've been in those parts where you are, so I know. Where I am could possibly be worse. I definitely enjoy my forays into more enlightened parts of the country, though, I will say!
Lady Pamela
05-29-2010, 05:36 PM
Dare To Be Diffrent!
http://www.crainium.net/jdjArchives/CarvedCrayons.jpg
Life is like a box of crayons.
Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you're really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I've got a few missing. It's ok though, because I've got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem? I mean there are so many different colors of life, of feeling, of articulation.. so when I meet someone who's an 8-color type.. I'm like, "hey girl, magenta!" and she's like, "oh, you mean purple!" and she goes off on her purple thing, and I'm like, "no - I want magenta!"”
I still have a tough time deciding when exactly I officially developed a Celebrity crush on Queen Latifah...
When I saw "Set it Off"....or "Last Holiday" :blink:
{Right up there with Tilda Swinton, Omahyra Mota & Salma Hayek... :sunglass:}
Enchantress
05-29-2010, 06:57 PM
I long for the sweet silence of my home.
scootebaby
05-29-2010, 07:36 PM
i went shopping today for my crab...at the beach..got hym a new accessory for his home and 3 new shells(hy loves to change them every couple of days)
*wishing shopping was always so relaxing and enjoyable*
Oh fuck that noise, sheesh...
Y'know, after watching the Opening Sequence to "Ice Age Dawn of the Dinosaur", I've come to the Sincere conclusion that Scratte the Squirrel is Queer....Or Bi, at Most.. :|
I've never seen someone so Obsessed over a Nut, he'd disregard a sexy sensual female Squirrel for it, yeah it's Food....but, and this is a Key, we're talking Ice Age..Preservation of Species, Instinct of a Squirrel to randomly fuck for survival........Not slap a potential mate and walk off with a NUT*occasionally caressing said Nut lovingly, dare I say lustfully??*.....
:blink:
yes, I'm bored...Waiting for "The Stepfather"{2009}
:cracked: :cracked:
scootebaby
05-29-2010, 08:25 PM
watching Fried Green Tomatoes" for like the 514th time
watching Fried Green Tomatoes" for like the 514th time
:seeingstars:
my best friends ex tried being like Idgie, constantly...all she managed to do was Irk the piss out of both of Us :sunglass:
I like Fried Green Tomatoes book though...
and The Color Purple...
Softly
05-29-2010, 10:18 PM
craving coffee :seeingstars:
Gemme
05-29-2010, 11:12 PM
I don't know what to do with myself. :blink:
Gayla
05-29-2010, 11:15 PM
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/37416579/ns/us_news-life//
Lady Pamela
05-30-2010, 12:57 AM
http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z221/GodsLittleWhispers/An_Angel_2_Watch_Over_You.gif
To hear an Angels whisper
You must listen with your heart
Kätzchen
05-30-2010, 01:14 AM
http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z221/GodsLittleWhispers/An_Angel_2_Watch_Over_You.gif
To hear an Angels whisper
You must listen with your heart
This is so beautiful and I so agree with the quote too!
*Listen to your heart*
:rose:
UofMfan
05-30-2010, 09:05 AM
I voted, I am hopeful!
Gemme
05-30-2010, 09:40 AM
I figured out what to do with myself! :thumbsup:
Andrew, Jr.
05-30-2010, 09:47 AM
I am watching lacrosse on TV, drinking a cold Coors Light, and thank God for Jack, Medusa, and Linus for helping me to get back online here!
:hangloose:
UofMfan
05-30-2010, 09:53 AM
I figured out what to do with myself! :thumbsup:
Do tell :blink:
Gemme
05-30-2010, 09:55 AM
Do tell :blink:
It's a secret. :blink:
I do, however, have to get off of here in order to accomplish said secret thing I've figured out. Boo.
UofMfan
05-30-2010, 09:57 AM
It's a secret. :blink:
I do, however, have to get off of here in order to accomplish said secret thing I've figured out. Boo.
Pfft. I am on to you.
Kätzchen
05-30-2010, 11:42 AM
I cannot post too much about this, but today is a really hard day for me because pf my eldest son - Whom I love with all my heart and soul and is my hero, over and over again!!!!
For all our Veterans - fallen in action or fallen by broken social systems in America - I send you all my love and devotion.
Thank you so much for your willingness to serve and protect in the most harrowing of conditions.
:blueheels:
diamondrose
05-30-2010, 11:45 AM
I am feeling a serious craving coming on for sandwichs.. hmm:seeingstars:
Passionaria
05-30-2010, 12:35 PM
This song song is dedicated to all our Veterans and their families:
To those who have lost loved ones
To those who gave their bodies
their lives
their limbs
shed their blood
came home tormented and emotionally scarred
I hate war
But I love and respect you for your courage
Thank you for standing up with the intention of protecting us
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:toast:
Somebody dumped a dog out near my dad's work. Nobody's been able to catch him for the last week, but today my dad managed to catch him.
Isn't he cute?
http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4050/4653870862_bc61a9e2e2.jpg
mommymommy
05-30-2010, 02:09 PM
I am wondering how to be real.Ive hidden who I am for so long,that Im slowly coming out but scared shitless at times,like people wont like me,but screw em I dont care if they like me.Ive told the important people in my life so the next step is just doing it.I like to dress like a boy,a little bit.IDK, people can be so mean at times.love makes things better so maybe their lacking in love?I need to find other gay people in my area I live in Michigan.howell area.
BoDy*ShOt
05-30-2010, 03:37 PM
hmmm....i like women who dress like boys....
and.....i've come to the realization that i really LIKE being rep'd. just sayin.
Tonight, I walked into my sweet little home to find that my new puppy had gotten into the junk mail pile and shredded every bit of it!! My Quiet Room looked like a war zone......jeez.
Services will be held at Our Lady of Perpetual Milkbones........ :vigil:
Ain't Nuthin' But a She Thang :)
na3u8S9tF9o
Gemme
05-31-2010, 12:50 AM
I wore a sombrero tonight. :blink:
AtLast
05-31-2010, 02:04 AM
Just thinking about the Gulf and deeply feeling sadness and anger. I especially am thinking about the families of the 11 workers killed and all of the people that must be scared to death about their livlihoods. And I can't stand seeing the wetlands being destroyed and all of the animals affected. What are future generations going to miss due to this? When will we learn?
Just feeling helpless...
tuffboi29
05-31-2010, 02:09 AM
(found this and couldn't help myself...so here...)
The Dog's Diary
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
tuffboi29
05-31-2010, 02:11 AM
(and of course i HAD to find the continuance of it...)
The Cat's Diary
Day 983 of My Captivity
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ...
{my bad...this was the first thing that popped in my head after reading the Dog :cracked:}
2:00 PM Got Neutered! Not My Favorite Thing !!
BestButchBoy
05-31-2010, 06:33 AM
Anything worth doing is worth overdoing.
UofMfan
05-31-2010, 06:36 AM
This was funny!
(and of course i HAD to find the continuance of it...)
The Cat's Diary
Day 983 of My Captivity
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ...
diamondrose
05-31-2010, 06:37 AM
my roommate is obsessed with chess sets ( as I listen to him ramble on about them.. )
Not just "No."...........but "Oh HELLZ no!!!!!!!!!!"
moxie
05-31-2010, 11:43 AM
I think she makes fun of me because she is just jealous of my fabulousness. Mmmhmm.
Gemme
05-31-2010, 11:55 AM
I want to sail on the good ship, Lollipop.
celine dion's pregnant with Twins....
looks like her patience paid off
Queerasfck
05-31-2010, 12:21 PM
http://files.list.co.uk/images/2008/07/17/1966b.jpg
apretty
05-31-2010, 12:26 PM
somebody shouldn't be taken pictures of my butt while i'm sleeping. *reported.
Queerasfck
05-31-2010, 12:29 PM
somebody shouldn't be taken pictures of my butt while i'm sleeping. *reported.
Lucky you, my phone is lame.
Write14u
05-31-2010, 01:17 PM
I've become an even bigger fan of the rain.
In an attempt to get away from the computer, I'm going to take myself to a movie now where I will watch Queen Latifah (**crush**) in a straight romantic comedy.
Mister Bent
05-31-2010, 06:13 PM
Lucky you, my phone is lame.
I was wondering why I didn't receive it.
Queerasfck
05-31-2010, 06:39 PM
I was wondering why I didn't receive it.
This image is forbidden.
Enchantress
05-31-2010, 06:53 PM
Smart phones aren't really that smart (either that or I'm not and that's just not possible.)
so....after following my brother to the backyard, figuring he was in the mood to nitpick stuff{weeds/mildew on the siding of the House}...I noticed he picked up a chick..
{bird type chick, ya pervs lol}He said he saw it yesterday when he came by to fetch his Dog, but tried to leave it alone, it was still there this evening, randomly opening its beak whenever my brother hovered over him, and since i supposedly was born to care for animals {major asskiss part here} he wondered what to do..
i mumbled and said "well, since u touched it, u got 2 choices...leave it alone, let the Goddess deal with it...or, bring it inside, i have a box and some warm materials", i wound up going to wal-mart for nightcrawlers wax worms, mealworms and crickets... :sunglass:
Took some coaxing, which figures...when there was nothing to feed, open beak frequently..now that I got juicy plump nightcrawlers? stubborn glare, beak shut...
I gave up on the big mealworms*for now*, i did mumble "your foods running off"
and they say being a tomboy isn't productive...:seeingstars:
http://i265.photobucket.com/albums/ii214/amor_en_silencio_77/The_Great_Gazoo.jpg
:moonstars:
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_a7jkcMVp5Vg/TABTTMNWHvI/AAAAAAAAL7g/fc0_lZ1z1uk/s400/spiders.jpg
I am so glad this is not my phobia.
tuffboi29
06-01-2010, 01:53 AM
I have a new avitar...I havent seen anyone else use it so now it's mine...well for now or until I can figure out how to put in a custom one....
BoDy*ShOt
06-01-2010, 04:00 AM
oh yeah. i'm just going to LOVE this new work schedule. LET THE DAY BEGIN. *grrr.stomp.grrrrrrr*
Gemme
06-01-2010, 12:20 PM
Pizza and Oreo ice cream; breakfast of champions!
Or, at least, the sick and whiney.
Louise Bourgeois dies
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/art/7794168/Louise-Bourgeois-invented-confessional-art.html
This shows some of her work:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/artanddesign/2010/jun/01/louise-bourgeois-art-maman-sculpture
Cold Stone Creamery here I come !!!!!
-horn toot- CHAAAAAARGE
BestButchBoy
06-01-2010, 03:20 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, start your engines.......
This would make a great birthday present for me...just sayin'
http://movies.yahoo.com/news/movies.reuters.com/most-famous-car-bonds-aston-martin-sale-reuters
After much planning...I made it clear I wanted to stop at Donato's Pizza...
Amidst protests and random gagging noises, I went...
{I also bought 5 bucks worth of random flavored Pop Rocks, but that's another story}
After Dinner whilst watching "Hell's Kitchen" , I made a small observation...
"For a buncha naysayers, u 2 piggies really Snarfed up the pizza, Hungry much?"
{It was a Large hand-tossed 'The works', and I got a Pepperoni Stromboli for me and my bro}
:candle::hangloose:
TenderKnight
06-01-2010, 07:50 PM
Sooooooo..
I'm at the bus stop and this middle aged chinese lady with a slight accent looks at me and says, "David! Come here, sit here.." I say that I am not David, my name is Tony, hello.. She says that I look just like her boyfriend, David.. I say, "no, not David." She keeps looking at me.. I jokingly offer to show her my ID.. She says, "No, I want to see something else.." I say, "Oh? What do you want to see?"
She then whispers something that I don't catch.. I say, "What?".. She whispers again.. I move closer.. She says, "I want to see you dick!".. I pull back and laughingly say, "No, only certain people get to see that.." She nods and then says, "You're very handsome.." I say, "Well thank you.." As I look a little despretly for the bus.. She then puts her hand on my thigh and starts torward my crotch.. I move her hand away and say, "No, thank you though.."
She pulls out some paper and a pen from her purse and starts writting something down.. I was hoping it WASN'T her number.. The buses pull up at this point and I get up.. I happen to be following her and she starts to grin and gestures for me to follow her onto the bus.. I shake my head and point to the bus behind her's and walk.. Fast.. To get on my bus..
lol.. God, how I love San Diego transit..
I also watched a homeless guy casually take his shoes, and then his pants off and settle back against the building he was leaning against.. In his boxers.. He saw me looking at him and gave me a lil head nod.. Which I returned with a thumbs up sign.. I then waited for my bus.. I don't think anyone else noticed..
Thank you, San Diego!
-Tony, who wishes he had a camera phone for some of this shit..
This evening, I began a new house project.....a quote wall.
The entry hall in my house has a wall that's about 8x9....so, I'm writing my favorite quotes on that wall......I don't care if it's crooked or not (and it already is)....it's my wall.....and I'm not perfect either.
It's gonna be neat, I think......and a conversation piece of art!
I've seen some funny stuff on this show...
This, hands down, Tops 'em all off as the Gayest , funniest shit...
l9LNsVoXxP4
:hamactor:
TenderKnight
06-01-2010, 10:45 PM
Water Balloons.. I think I'm in love..
<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/kag4tU6B3yc&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/kag4tU6B3yc&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>
:|
Massive
06-01-2010, 11:31 PM
My babygirl just got this message from My cell service provider cos it's running slow:
Our system is experiencing problem at this moment, your message was not sent successfully. We apologize the incontinence caused, please try to send your reply later.
I think I need to e-mail someone at the company and suggest either spellcheck, or maybe that someone reads what's being sent out to people :|
ravfem
06-01-2010, 11:35 PM
My babygirl just got this message from My cell service provider cos it's running slow:
Our system is experiencing problem at this moment, your message was not sent successfully. We apologize the incontinence caused, please try to send your reply later.
I think I need to e-mail someone at the company and suggest either spellcheck, or maybe that someone reads what's being sent out to people :|
And my second thought (because my first was "do they use that term differently over there?") was, "dang, i am irritated that Hy isn't gonna get my reply, but i ain't gonna pee myself over it!"
:byebye:
Massive
06-01-2010, 11:36 PM
And my second thought (because my first was "do they use that term differently over there?") was, "dang, i am irritated that Hy isn't gonna get my reply, but i ain't gonna pee myself over it!"
:byebye:
On behalf of the United Kingdom I apologise for making anyone reading this pee themselves
:cheesy:
TenderKnight
06-01-2010, 11:55 PM
My babygirl just got this message from My cell service provider cos it's running slow:
Our system is experiencing problem at this moment, your message was not sent successfully. We apologize the incontinence caused, please try to send your reply later.
I think I need to e-mail someone at the company and suggest either spellcheck, or maybe that someone reads what's being sent out to people :|
OHHH.. Engrish! How I love thee.. lmao http://www.engrish.com
TenderKnight
06-02-2010, 12:27 AM
OMG.. I think this is who wanted to molest me at the bus stop..
<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/-SRW2MQcdd0&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/-SRW2MQcdd0&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
diamondrose
06-02-2010, 12:41 AM
I have exactly one week till my vacation. The excitment is building. Although I am off from work this evening, I look foward to my coming week...so my vacation gets here :blueheels:
diamondrose
06-02-2010, 12:50 AM
I eat watermelon with a fork and straw
Gayla
06-02-2010, 01:55 AM
http://users.frii.com/donlight/archive/97pages/asshole.gif
Gemme
06-02-2010, 02:01 AM
I eat watermelon with a fork and straw
I eat watermelon with a fork and knife and have the salt shaker and a napkin on hand as well. :tease:
Gayla
06-02-2010, 02:09 AM
I eat watermelon with a fork and knife and have the salt shaker and a napkin on hand as well. :tease:
Ditto.
And then I drink the juice off the plate and try to filter the seeds with my teeth.
Gemme
06-02-2010, 02:13 AM
Ditto.
And then I drink the juice off the plate and try to filter the seeds with my teeth.
I don't get all clever with it like that (my hand/teeth coordination is not good). I push the seeds off the rind and onto the plate as I go until there's nothing but juice in the rind and then I drink it from the rind.
adorable
06-02-2010, 02:24 AM
"When I use a word,’ Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone, ‘it means just what I choose it to mean — neither more nor less.’
’The question is,’ said Alice, ‘whether you can make words mean so many different things.’
’The question is,’ said Humpty Dumpty, ‘which is to be master — that’s all."
~ Lewis Carroll (Through The Looking Glass)
Bad_boi
06-02-2010, 03:06 AM
YouTube- Static-X - The Only (Video)
tuffboi29
06-02-2010, 03:49 AM
I REALLY want a blackjack taco from tacobell.I dont know why...they dont even make them anymore!!!
diamondrose
06-02-2010, 04:49 AM
I just buy seedless watermelons..
TenderKnight
06-02-2010, 09:45 AM
And now I want watermelon..
NJFemmie
06-02-2010, 09:49 AM
Speaking of watermelon, I have a huge one sitting on my counter.
(And no, I don't mean the cat).
TenderKnight
06-02-2010, 09:58 AM
<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/0VuiNRF2g_w&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0VuiNRF2g_w&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
Blaze
06-02-2010, 10:24 AM
I was watching this Welcome to Canada talking Beaver and I started thinking about Linus. Now mind you, I have been to Canada, and I love it! But I figured Linus would either get a kick out of this, or chew me a new one, lol.
YouTube- Talking Beaver on the Highway
NJFemmie
06-02-2010, 10:49 AM
She told me that if I caught Her cold, I would get spanked.
Well, I caught Her cold, and I wasn't even trying.
:|
(*sniffles*)
TenderKnight
06-02-2010, 10:51 AM
I was watching this Welcome to Canada talking Beaver and I started thinking about Linus. Now mind you, I have been to Canada, and I love it! But I figured Linus would either get a kick out of this, or chew me a new one, lol.
YouTube- Talking Beaver on the Highway (http://youtube.com/watch?v=sekLEG8xsOs&feature=channel)
lol.. Now that was cute! Love the last part.. "Cheeeeeeeese!"
Gemme
06-02-2010, 11:00 AM
Speaking of watermelon, I have a huge one sitting on my counter.
(And no, I don't mean the cat).
Are you sure? Did you poke it to see if it growls?
*had a cat people often mistook for a throw pillow on the couch* :blink:
<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/0VuiNRF2g_w&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0VuiNRF2g_w&hl=en_US&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
The host's head...where did it go?
She told me that if I caught Her cold, I would get spanked.
Well, I caught Her cold, and I wasn't even trying.
:|
(*sniffles*)
Now you have something to look forward to when you both feel better. :cheesy:
NJFemmie
06-02-2010, 11:15 AM
Are you sure? Did you poke it to see if it growls?
*had a cat people often mistook for a throw pillow on the couch* :blink:
Now you have something to look forward to when you both feel better. :cheesy:
Ember's fluffy, but not that fluffy, lol.
I do refer to him as my little butterball every now and then.
Hmmm, She could knock the congestion right out though .... *thinking*
NJFemmie
06-02-2010, 11:20 AM
So we went to see this little black kitten last week. Well, he turned out to be a little too aggressive for my taste - kinda reminded me of a compact version of a mean black cat I once knew many moons ago.
However....... we did come across a little silver/grey tabby that looks like a little wolf or even a tiny siberian tiger.
Looks very much like this, but a little lighter:
http://www.findakitten.co.uk/images/gallerykitten26.jpg
Hopefully, we'll get to pick him up before the weekend. (They wouldn't let us take him unless he got fixed first... gggrrrr) I always thought age played a factor when getting a cat fixed.
??
Enchantress
06-02-2010, 12:26 PM
HdUeVAkzEas
From the Muppet Show.
TenderKnight
06-02-2010, 12:32 PM
I have a blister on top of each of my big toes.. Last night, i put alcohol on them.. I think i got a little high from all the endorphines rushing through my system! lmao.. Yeah, it hurt.. soooo good..
At this point, I laughed and realized how perverted I really am.. I'll never be a cucumber again.. The brine has struck and I am a pickle forever..
On a side note.. I am hoping that they don't get infected :(
Is that TMI? I think it may be.. but.. ah well.. I just like to share..
JakeTulane
06-02-2010, 05:17 PM
Six shooters and moving targets
moxie
06-02-2010, 05:31 PM
It is not "soccer mom".
gawds, I feel so old....Goonies 25th Anniversary on AMC
Enchantress
06-02-2010, 06:54 PM
Fresh Blueberries equal delight.
Write14u
06-02-2010, 06:57 PM
Feeling responsible for my co-worker not liking the frappacino I recommended. Booo.
I'm not liking trying to be incognito (post-work!) and running into people with whom I work!
:curtain:
Mister Bent
06-02-2010, 07:15 PM
I'm not liking trying to be incognito (post-work!) and running into people with whom I work!
:curtain:
Out of context sighting.
Enchantress
06-02-2010, 09:43 PM
I can not believe that I am watching Mama Mia (again). I think I'm addicted to ABBA shhh don't tell anyone.
I like it when my daughter decides to just hop in the car and drive to Austin for dinner with her Mom......that made me smile so big!
Has anybody else seen the French gay McDonald's ad? It made me happy.
SBuKuA9nHsw
Lady Pamela
06-03-2010, 12:46 AM
A Fun Fact for Each State
http://www.waderson.com/images/selectUnitedStates.gif
ALABAMA .... Was the first place to have 9-1-1, started in 1968.
ALASKA ... One out of every 64 people has a pilot's license.
ARIZONA .... Is the only state in the continental U.S. that doesn't
follow Daylight Savings Time.
ARKANSAS .... Has the only active diamond mine in the U.S.
CALIFORNIA ... Its economy is so large that if it were a country,
it would rank seventh in the entire world...and is broke right now like alot of other countries.
COLORADO .... In 1976 it became the only state to turn down the
Olympics.
CONNECTICUT ... The Frisbee was invented at Yale University.
DELAWARE .... Has more scientists and engineers than any other
state.
FLORIDA .... At 759 square miles, Jacksonville is the U.S.'s
largest city in area.
GEORGIA .... It was here, in 1886, that pharmacist John Pemberton
made the first vat of Coca-Cola.
HAWAII .. Hawaiians live, on average, five years longer than
residents in any other state.
IDAHO ... TV was invented in Rigby, Idaho, in 1922.
ILLINOIS .... The Chicago River is dyed green every St.Patrick's
Day.
INDIANA ..... Home to Santa Claus, Indiana, which get a half
million letters to Santa every year.
IOWA ... Winnebagos get their name from Winnebago County. Also, it
is the only state that begins with two vowels.
KANSAS ... Liberal, Kansas, has an exact replica of the house in
The Wizard of Oz.
KENTUCKY .... Has more than $6 billion in gold underneath Fort Knox.
LOUISIANA .... Has parishes instead of counties because they were
originally Spanish church units.
MAINE ... It's so big, it covers as many square miles as the other
five New England states combined.
MARYLAND .... The Ouija board was created in Baltimore in 1892.
MASSACHUSETTS ... The Fig Newton is named afterNewton,Massachusetts.
MICHIGAN .... Fremont, home to Gerber, is the baby food capital of
the world.
MINNESOTA .... Bloomington's Mall of America is so big, if you
spent 10 minutes in each store, you'd be there nearly four days.
MISSISSIPPI ... President Teddy Roosevelt refused to shoot a bear
here... that's how the teddy bear got its name.
MISSOURI .... Is the birthplace of the ice cream cone.
MONTANA .... A sapphire from Montana is in the Crown Jewels of
England.
NEBRASKA .... More triplets are born here than in any other state.
NEW HAMPSHIRE ... Birthplace of Tupperware, invented in 1938 by
Earl Tupper.
NEW JERSEY ... Has the most shopping malls in one area in the world.
NEW MEXICO ... Smokey the Bear was rescued from a 1950 forest fire here.
NEW YORK .... Is home to the nation's oldest cattle ranch, started
in 1747 in Montauk.
NORTH CAROLINA ... Home of the first Krispy Kreme doughnut.
NORTH DAKOTA ... Rigby, North Dakota, is the exact geographic
center of North America.
OHIO ... The hot dog was invented here in 1900.
OKLAHOMA .... The grounds of the state capital are covered by
operating oil wells.
OREGON ... Has the most ghost towns in the country.
PENNSYLVANIA ... The smiley, :) was first used in 1980 by computer
scientists at Carnegie Mellon University.
RHODE ISLAND ... The nation's oldest bar, the White Horse Tavern,
opened here in 1673.
SOUTH CAROLINA ... Sumter County is home to the world's largest
gingko farm.
SOUTH DAKOTA ... Is the only state that has never had an earthquake.
TENNESSEE .... Nashville's Grand Ole Opry is the longest running
live radio show in the world.
TEXAS ... Dr. Pepper was invented in Waco back in 1885.
UTAH ... The first Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant opened here in 1952.
VERMONT .... Montpelier is the only state capital without a McDonald's.
VIRGINIA .... Home of the world's largest office building ....
the Pentagon.
WASHINGTON ... Seattle has twice as many college graduates as any
other state.
WASHINGTON D.C. ... Was the first planned capital in the world.
WEST VIRGINIA ... Had the world's first brick paved street, Summers
Street, laid in Charleston in 1870.
WISCONSIN .... The ice cream sundae was invented here in 1881 to
get around Blue Laws prohibiting ice cream from being sold on Sundays.
WYOMING .... Was the first state to allow women to vote.
Gemme
06-03-2010, 02:33 AM
I knew I liked Roosevelt. Good show, fellow.
BestButchBoy
06-03-2010, 04:01 AM
http://www.pictorymag.com/showcases/new-york-city/
Scroll down to view images.
20 minutes is not 48 hours long.......
Gemme
06-03-2010, 10:59 AM
20 minutes is not 48 hours long.......
:blink:
True dat.
:blink:
In other news, I woke up hungry.
I had my skull xrayed today. It is a gorgeous skull, it turns out. This has decided the cremation question for me. Burial it is! This beaut should stick around.
Seeing one's own skull is like time travel - in a hundred years, that's what this face will be. It's like previewing one's own death and seeing how terrible and beautiful it will be. We really aren't so different than hermit crabs - living for a time inside a shell of sorts, then leaving it behind.
There's a strange joke stuck in my head....
Instead of a song...
Jesus and St. Paul are enjoyin the Celestial Choir, when an elderly gentleman shows up, slightly confused.
Paul asks his name and he shrugs, Jesus gets curious and asks maybe he could jog his memory...
Older Guy "Well, I remember fish, I have a son, and I'm a Carpenter, I think...."
Jesus quickly hugs him sayin' "FATHER!!!!"
Older Guy : "Pinocchio !!!"
My ex {who's now a Discalced Carmelite nun *thank you FaceBook*} told me this once...
:mohawk:
tuffboi29
06-03-2010, 07:49 PM
This tacobell craving is getting out of control...Imma make a run to the border.
Enchantress
06-03-2010, 08:18 PM
Every Thursday in June is Stephen King night on Sci-Fi!
Every Thursday in June is Stephen King night on Sci-Fi!
I've always suspected that Stephen King lived inside June.
And now we know.
Enchantress
06-03-2010, 08:26 PM
I've always suspected that Stephen King lived inside June.
And now we know.
*blink*
But only for four weeks
*blink*
But only for four weeks
Four weeks for June~King is not nearly enough......
Massive
06-03-2010, 09:43 PM
l7AkmlpQ1q0&feature=related
Join the President's pledge to repeal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" today. (http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/repealdadt?source=FBS&share=)
tuffboi29
06-04-2010, 02:32 AM
I have come to the conclusion that giving the dog chilli is NOT a good idea. :blink:
IttyBittyFem
06-04-2010, 03:19 AM
A Fun Fact for Each State
http://www.waderson.com/images/selectUnitedStates.gif
NEW JERSEY ... Has the most shopping malls in one area in the world.
This would be Paramus, New Jersey, right in my backyard!
A fun little fact to go with that ti-bet, the county where Paramus is located, Bergen, enforces "The Blue Law", no clothing or home good sales permitted on Sunday. All these Malls and you can't even shop on Sunday's! (Which is fine by me. I'd rather have my finger nails pulled out then to go shopping.)
Thank you Lady {{{{{{{{Pamela}}}}}}}} for posting this!
IttyBittyFem
06-04-2010, 03:28 AM
Currently, I'm at a very healthy frame of mind. I'm just tickled PINK!!!!!!!!!
BestButchBoy
06-04-2010, 04:11 AM
Take a vacation from the Internet.
Kitty in the driveway, stalkin' the birds at the feeder....and of course, my dogs are stalking the cat ~ through the windows. That must be totally frustrating for them. hee hee
Ever seen in some Movies, where the primary character is walking really slow, Oblivious to everything, and his/her surroundings is passing by in Very fast-forward mode? The cars, the sky, pedestrians...but that one person is slower than a fucking turtle?
I know there's a term for that in Cinematography, just cant figure it....
:brainsucker:
Enchantress
06-04-2010, 02:21 PM
I fear my head may explode if I continue doing this math.
BestButchBoy
06-04-2010, 02:36 PM
Go ahead, judge a book by its cover.
Gemme
06-04-2010, 08:35 PM
Garlic pussy. :blink:
Ya know? One of the remarkable things about having a site like this is it has a tendency to draw us together across the miles......
And so....when Rufus and Melissa decided to come to Austin for Pride this weekend, they wanted to get together with as many of the Austin crew as possible....we met them for dinner tonight at Threadgill's ~ a campy place with good food and live music (outside).
And here we all sat with our 2 new Honorary Austinites....and I can't speak for anyone else, but I felt as though they'd been here a while!
How would we have known them had it not been for The Planet? Thanks to Jack and Medusa!
What a great evening!
moxie
06-04-2010, 09:16 PM
Tonight's top news story: Justin Bieber is coming to town in November. I can hardly contain myself.
“At the side of the everlasting why, is a yes, and a yes, and a yes.”
- EM Forster, A Room With A View
CVNDBda6MgI
Enchantress
06-04-2010, 11:38 PM
I don't understand why everytime my cursor is on a word a little blue box pops up with the word in different languages.
Confusion abounds this evening.
Tricksie
06-05-2010, 01:18 AM
This is Post Number One for me!:cheer:
I should be happy to have 2 barking alarms..... to alert me to a possible home invasion, Ya know.......
And they went off this morning at 4:30 am as we all heard the front door open....and I'm thinking ~ Dear GOD...did I forget to lock the front door [again!]? (I'm notorious for this.) And I can't even TELL You how quickly I went from deep slumber to terrified and wide awake when my daughter opens my bedroom door to tell me she came in "a little early"...................I wasn't expecting her until later today.
:|
So SHE has gone to sleep. In the meantime, I'm up, have cleaned up the "I'm so excited to see You, I've peed on the kitchen floor for You!" puppy accident, made coffee, drank 2 cups of said coffee and have done 2 loads of laundry.
Stay tuned, for later today, precious daughter will be given some ground rules for this sort of thing.
And btw.....her 'announcement text' that she was coming in early came after she went to bed.
I know.
Did I mention that I love my daughter? :tea:
BestButchBoy
06-05-2010, 06:46 AM
Salt and pepper should be passed together, even if the request was for only one.
Semantics
06-05-2010, 06:56 AM
Tonight's top news story: Justin Bieber is coming to town in November. I can hardly contain myself.
My daughter is going to see him tonight in Massachussetts. She can't contain herself at all. :lol2:
I would love to have a cozy little room, full of bookcases and about 6 of Semantics' avatar chairs.....neat visual, huh?
LeftWriteFemme
06-05-2010, 07:20 AM
VtTNK5HZ84A
:fastdraq:
I've been working on my art since 2 o'clock.
I'm still not done.
moxie
06-05-2010, 09:03 PM
cranky, whiny, mopey all the time. perky, happy laughs. stalemate.
The Sissies are drinking Sangria and watching "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"...........
It's funnier with Sangria.
Trust me.
Kätzchen
06-05-2010, 11:44 PM
SooOOoOOoo,
earlier I was ready for bed, totally relaxing in the moment - I even had restful music on. Then, my mother calls me about something important and now, I'm on an adrenaline surge..... Hopefully, I will feel ready for sleep again, soon...
:moonstars:
AtLast
06-06-2010, 12:35 AM
The Sissies are drinking Sangria and watching "My Big Fat Greek Wedding"...........
It's funnier with Sangria.
Trust me.
You got sissies???
:glasses:
tuffboi29
06-06-2010, 01:48 AM
My big brother came by today(yanno,the only one that likes me out of all my sibilings?)and took me to taco bell....I then rewarded him for said taco bell by coming out of the closet....The smartass looked at me and said.."Tuff...Ive already known this for years...Have you told yourself yet?"
:|
Now I have to question...am I always the last to know EVERYTHING??? :seconddoh: :wtf: ???
My Sissy spent the night last night because we may have had a whole pitcher of sangria while watching funny movies. But it had fruit in it so it was healthy sangria.......and a salad.
And Ben & Jerry's......
Gemme
06-06-2010, 07:11 PM
The coworkers that I like the best do the shittiest jobs and the two that are okay but not fantastic are the ones that try harder. :blink:
Billy
06-06-2010, 07:14 PM
The coworkers that I like the best do the shittiest jobs and the two that are okay but not fantastic are the ones that try harder. :blink:
`
You'll have that ,just sayin :blink:
Gemme
06-06-2010, 07:17 PM
`
You'll have that ,just sayin :blink:
Yeah, but why? Is it some sort of twisted way of balancing my work life out cuz if so, that's fucked up.
*edited to add*
I just finished one of the PostSecret books, so I may be reading a little much into things. Maybe.
WILDCAT
06-06-2010, 07:19 PM
... a most wonderful spring I have had this year!!! (Thank you universe!!)
:praying:
*Happy Pride month ya'll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :rainbowAfro: SMOOOOOCH!!!!!!!
Write14u
06-06-2010, 07:25 PM
Hummus and pita chips. It might be the best food ever.
Venus007
06-06-2010, 08:40 PM
AARG I may have just hurt myself trying to make MS-DRGs interesting
Yesterday, I saw a pink retro bicycle. I. want. one.
Pixie
06-06-2010, 09:39 PM
The song was wrong this whole time......beans aren't even a fruit....hmmmm:fart:
NJFemmie
06-07-2010, 09:21 AM
In the Dark Ages it was thought that when you sneezed, a brief opportunity for 'devils' to enter your mouth was present, thus explains the origins of 'bless you'.
:blink:
*achoooo*
I r TEAM ERIC
:cheerleader:
http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs275.snc1/10233_141041723562_69144888562_2452591_5817357_n.j pg
{Eric Northman is the Sheriff of Area 5, a vampire district in Louisiana. A Viking warrior in life, he is over 1,000 years old, the oldest vampire in Louisiana, and a powerful member of the vampire community. Eric is manipulative, tricky and confident, and has little respect for human life. This does not make him particularly popular, but despite this, few can resist his bad-boy charm..
Eat the dirt he walks upon, Edward, HA!}
:vampire:
I believe I'm having a Melody Claire Day......:moonstars:
Leigh
06-07-2010, 10:36 AM
Nothing like spending the day watching CSI and playing on BFP :cheesy:
kassykit
06-07-2010, 10:40 AM
blueberries rock......
But what is better is the feeling of the sun caressing your skin.......almost like a lover :)
UofMfan
06-07-2010, 11:45 AM
Tonight I will be going to see SATC 2 with a friend. I look forward to some Juan Valdez and good company, I hope the movie is good too :blink:
fiercegrrl
06-07-2010, 12:24 PM
I really want to go get a kitten. but I already have two great cats and think three is probably too many. sigh.
Ms. Tabitha
06-07-2010, 12:57 PM
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g196/tabithaintx/129198847257000194.jpg
:|
aww, Jeff the tech wubs Me
He walked by grabbed my chips and said 'yknow, this is not something u should be eating'....
"but it's healthy!!"....
"Uhh..Since when?"....
"It says it right there...gluten free, natural, lightly salted"
"Dont forget a very important part, high on potassium"....
-mumblegrumblescowl- party pooper.
Every time I see a new kids on the block vid. I'm reminded of when i spent my last summer with my father, 4th of july, he took us to a big park...he told us we could have any junk food we wanted....Being ambitious and pushing the limit, I asked for twice baked potato skins Loaded, and a large lemonaid slushie...
In the evening, the "lazer" show started after some introduction to the Group, I figured it'd be like back home, in puerto rico...Maybe a video of them, music..not the actual group...it didn't really dawn on me then..i figured the screaming twits were in awe of the lazer show & then the huge fireworks that would follow....
My father would throw a perpetually puzzled glance while I picked at weeds{i was bored}
Que carajo sabia yo?-shrug-
:seeingstars::seeingstars:
I've been doing art since Friday. Still not done......but sho' is looking good.
Gemme
06-07-2010, 02:08 PM
Yesterday, I saw a pink retro bicycle. I. want. one.
Except purple with lime green streamers?
Maybe a daisy attached to your bell?
I used to own a Schwinn. Old school. It was so cool.
http://i56.photobucket.com/albums/g196/tabithaintx/129198847257000194.jpg
:|
This is disturbing, but oddly interesting. :thinking:
afixer
06-07-2010, 02:46 PM
disambiguation
tuffboi29
06-07-2010, 03:11 PM
I think I'm in love with hot chocolate mixed with english toffee capuchino.
My dog just ate my favorite bra :(
apretty
06-07-2010, 05:48 PM
My dog just ate my favorite bra :(
that sucks, PM me your size--i have lots of new and near new extras in all different sizes (well, D and up)
and i have a dog that can go for weeks w/out eating a shoe and then i get to where i begin to trust him and turn my back and he's eaten one in 20 minutes. (for 4 years this has been going on!!)
that sucks, PM me your size--i have lots of new and near new extras in all different sizes (well, D and up)
and i have a dog that can go for weeks w/out eating a shoe and then i get to where i begin to trust him and turn my back and he's eaten one in 20 minutes. (for 4 years this has been going on!!)
Heh well I float somewhere between B and C, but thanks much for the offer. :)
maybe eating one's bra or shoes is a sign of devotion, but I do wish they'd show it some other way!
apretty
06-07-2010, 06:19 PM
Heh well I float somewhere between B and C, but thanks much for the offer. :)
maybe eating one's bra or shoes is a sign of devotion, but I do wish they'd show it some other way!
aww boo!
yeah, thankfully he's not into bras. but chester's eaten shoes that i haven't even WORN. that's more like, devotion to ...my shoe shopping?
aww boo!
yeah, thankfully he's not into bras. but chester's eaten shoes that i haven't even WORN. that's more like, devotion to ...my shoe shopping?
maybe it's a possession by demons thing
Leigh
06-07-2010, 06:39 PM
I had to post this here
This is My 1,000th post :cheesy:
Oneida
06-07-2010, 06:55 PM
THEN: <object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wDsg4P5HG6w&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wDsg4P5HG6w&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>
NOW: <object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ah5S7R-h208&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ah5S7R-h208&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>
Lady Pamela
06-07-2010, 08:44 PM
http://poundingheartbeat.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/mirrored-reflection.gif
Sometimes what I see in the mirror
is not a reflection of me.
I see all the imperfections
that others cannot see.
How false a reflection can be
when you look inside and see.
The many pages in life
that you could have done differently
Enchantress
06-07-2010, 09:11 PM
bSL4cmFW_GU
Andrew, Jr.
06-07-2010, 09:14 PM
"The Blind Side" is the best movie I have watched in a long time. :hangloose:
SassyLeo
06-07-2010, 09:27 PM
The Bachelorette = guilty pleasure :nerd:
Lady Pamela
06-07-2010, 10:24 PM
Your Weely Horoscopes
http://www.dreamstime.com/funny-signs-in-the-zodiac-thumb6115199.jpg
Funny Horoscopes
Aries
Aries have ramlike eyebrows and smug expressions. They should not be quite so smug because they are constantly clunking themselves in the skull. Cat Stevens' "Hard Headed Woman" was probably an Aries. Aries rarely say one thing and do another. They usually do the wrong thing and don't discuss it. Never point this out to an Aries unless you want your kidneys pulled out through your sinuses. Aries folks love Pisceans because Pisces people make them feel well-grounded. Aries love to laugh at the funny moon-people who suck their thumbs at age 35. Aries use guns to describe philosophical concepts. Whether you live in a palatial estate or a cardboard tepee, you will insist until death that it is exactly what you always wanted. Most Aries were concrete parking bumpers in at least two of their past lives. Aries are never born. They skip gaily from their mothers' wombs. This may even involve rollerblades. The Aries makes life decisions as a toddler. Aries marry several times for funnies but never divorce. Their spouses have many freak accidents resulting in death or crippling injury. Being infallible, God is probably an Aries. This would make Satan an Aquarius. Aries always hold management positions. If one is assigned to clean toilets, he will form a one-man union. Then he will go and picket in the parking lot. All of you think you're Lech Walesa. People run away when an Aries comes around. They know that if they do not, the Aries will set them on fire. Aries hate listening to Scorpios talk because they take pride in being even more self-centered. In fact, much to the Scorpios' dismay, you are the biggest pricks in the zodiac. Your rams' horns are in everyone else's asses.
Taurus
You are brooding emotion incarnate. One minute you're up, the next you're down, the next you've shot your favorite newscaster in the kneecaps, "just 'cuz.". You're very earthy, which may mean that you don't shower as often as most people. Or it may just mean that you like to roll around with your nose in clover and sigh. Taureans love happy movies where everyone is jolly and having fun, but they fight with waiters and get upset with billboards. They like to psychoanalyze their friends but have no real experience with life in general. Taureans mumble while describing philosophical concepts. The Taurus is a strange bird because he or she holds grudges about things that never actually happened. This may stem from the feelings of inadequacy resulting from being beaten out for first in line in the zodiac by Aries. That is the Taurean self-image, always second best. However, they are undoubtedly the best at feeling like second best. All Taureans want to be God. Unfortunately, God is an Aries. You are generally tough to figure out because you answer every question with a question. Also, you won't come out from under the bed. Most Taureans love conflict. If nothing is wrong, then that in itself is something wrong. Some especially like bar fights. If they can't get into an actual bar fight, they will make up interesting stories about them which they can tell their friends right before they psychoanalyze them. If it weren't for Bazooka Joe and The Family Circus, Taureans wouldn't know what to do. You feel that you are going nowhere in life. You are probably right. Milwaukee is full of Taureans. Taureans are impatient and pushy. They are in a tremendous hurry to get to the nowhere that they intend to go to. They make little dioramas of their homes, complete with tiny effigies of the people they know, and act out scenarios of the way things would be if they were God.
Gemini
Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius.
Cancer
You like to know what's going on in the lives of everyone in the galaxy. However, you tend not know know what's going on in your own. If you are lucky, your friends will tell you. Cancerians only get dressed because they have to, and their fashion sense can only be described as "erratic." You are more likely than any other sign in the zodiac (except Pisces, who does not iron) to iron your clothes by sleeping with them sandwiched between the mattress and box-spring. Likewise, you can stretch one pair of underwear out for almost a month. Your home is like your very own Biodome, and you can remain indoors for months at a time. Despite your need to be everyone's savior, you need no social interaction. SWAT teams often show up, mistakenly thinking there's a hostage situation. A Cancer is like a walking Ladies' Home Journal, quick on the draw with shortcake recipes and helpful hints on how to talk to your teen. Whether they know it or not, they are all born with an exceptional talent for cross-stitch. So much for buying the world a Coke - they would breast-feed the world if they could. This trait is not gender-specific. You will never excel in sports because you have to rest for fifteen minutes every time you breathe. You do not mind, since you plan to conduct your career from the comfort of your own bed. You maintain your questionable health through a steady diet of Ho-Ho's and beer. You also imbibe a great deal of Pepto-Bismol in order to confuse your numerous ulcers. People walk on you often. Actually, not often - all the time. If you think someone is screwing you, you're probably right. The most entertaining thing about this is that you like it. You strive to be a doormat. Cancerians coin their own words to describe philosophical concepts. This is why it is no surprise that George W. Bush is a Cancer. Cancerians have minimal influence over their friends, even though they show up with homemade soup to remedy every minor or major tragedy. However, they wield their power through the fact that they know what everyone is thinking at any given time. This is why they are never invited to parties. Cancerians claim to be "tactful". The word for this is actually "shiftless". Cancerians are always appointed to take their drunken, drooling friends home. These friends are usually Pisceans
Leo
You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot. Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo. Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays. Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos. A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts. Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo. Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room. Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and s**t under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight". Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question. Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance. Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls.
Virgo
You are a pain in the ass. You regulate your breathing and color-coordinate the clothes in your closet. No Virgo in history has ever belched. Virgos clean every square inch of everything they own twice daily with a toothbrush. Everything has its place, and yours is on the floor scrubbing with a magnifying glass, checking for germs. Obsessive-compulsive disorder? A nice euphemism for the word "Virgo". Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts. You commit a lot of drive-by shootings. When you are questioned, you tell the police that it was because "the bastard had a filthy car". The police usually let you go because they are Virgos too. It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us. Hell for a Virgo is being locked up in an elevator for eternity with a naked Aquarius. That is because in hell, Aquarians are allowed to bring beer, which they leave all over the floor. Virgos, however, have to surrender their brooms and squeegees to God. Virgos also have a hard time coping when they find out there's something under the fridge. But it's usually just a depressed Taurus. Virgos have read enough Hints from Heloise to know that the depressed Taurus can be coaxed out from under the fridge with a banana wine cooler. Virgos don't see the world in shades of black and white. They see it in shades of clean and dirty. Cat hair makes Virgos foam at the mouth. Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer. Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ass. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo.
Lady Pamela
06-07-2010, 10:31 PM
Weekly Horoscopes #2
http://www.dreamstime.com/funny-signs-in-the-zodiac-thumb6115199.jpg
JUSR FOR FUN
Libra
You are oh-so-elegant and tasteful to the point of incurring nausea from loved ones. You are also bipolar as hell and can't make a decision on your own. You usually consult your therapist or TV Guide. Libras are trendy and malleable folks. They are funny because they will glom onto something they hated before if it suddenly becomes fashionable. Velour is not entirely lost upon these people. Libras eat a lot of ethnic food from cultures they don't understand. They single-handedly started the cappucino movement. Ask them why, and they will claim something unintelligible about solidarity. You constantly worry about what other people think. If you really paid any attention, maybe people would like you more. Libras use quotes from David Mamet plays to describe philosophical concepts. Then they have those concepts engraved upon nice little wallet cards. The Libran interest in current events ends with the J. Crew catalog. They don't eat fast food or have any clue where their trash goes. They have other people tie their expensive shoes. Only two Libras have ever been found in thrift stores. All of their bell-bottoms were color-coordinated to match their lamé turtlenecks. Libras are always on the cutting edge of what the rest of us think is absolute pretentious bulls**t. They have huge collections of CDs they've never even listened to. Libras give to designer charities. Hollywood is full of Libras. You are the reason butterfly hairpins and parachute pants have made a comeback. Next on the list is those big jam shorts. You probably never threw out your old pair. Hang on to your Winger t-shirt too. Get a Libra as drunk as possible and he or she will still be able to explain the difference between café latté and café au lait. This is peculiar as the rest of us know that there is no difference at all.
Scorpio
You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bulls**t terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board. You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower. Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up. Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt. Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader. Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts. It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested. Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke. Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?" Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women. Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it.
Sagittarius
Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way. Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender. Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus. Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants. Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts. Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad. Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro. The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well. A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip.
Capricorn
Capricorns are hardworking, reliable, and dull as hell. They are always on the move, headed to their next delusion of grandeur. They are often good at math which explains why they are such pains in the ass. René Descartes was a great mathematician and a crappy philosopher, so he must have been a Capricorn. Stephen Hawking is even more Capricorn because he's all of the above and a pompous S.O.B. to boot. Sure, he's overcome a lot of obstacles etc. etc., but even in perfect health you can't overcome being a Capricorn. Most politicians are Capricorns, which is why our country is always in the hole. It is not surprising that politicians need so much security around them all the time. Capricorns are like a strange cross between a Leo and a Virgo. They think that this makes them both charismatic and logical. In reality, it means that they are tight-assed and nitpicky, and have to keep their egos in the backyard. In the event of nuclear war, only cockroaches and Capricorns would find a way to survive. The rest of us just don't want to live in a world like that. The nation's cockeyed system of toll roads was probably designed by a freakin' Capricorn. They learn how to screw the public over at an early age. Their parents buy them books of law for Christmas so they can underline the loopholes. Capricorns cannot even fathom, much less describe, philosophical concepts because they don't involve equations. (See comments about Descartes and Hawking above) Capricorns own lots of Filofaxes and other tools to organize the lives they do not have. They love to be seen talking on their cell phones. These phones are not actually turned on because Capricorns don't have any friends to call. Capricorns went out of style in 1989. They still believe that Trump was a visionary. Most of the people arrested for counterfeiting are Capricorns
Aquarius
The Aquarius loves a party. Anytime, anywhere is their motto. It is not unlikely that an Aquarius will consider a wake a good place to meet chicks. Aquarians tend to be nostalgic about the 1960s because that was the last time they could be naked in public and get away with it. Aquarians love to be naked. It is even better if they are naked and crocked. 97.4% of the Night Train consumed in the past thirty years has been consumed by Aquarians. Almost every Aquarian will claim to have seen Jerry Garcia's image in their Froot Loops at least once. Froot Loops is a very Aquarian cereal. So is Rice Krispies, since it will engage in a friendly chat with the Aquarian as he or she is eating breakfast. Count Chocula is off-limits, however. It belongs to the Scorpios. Aquarians are the only people in the zodiac who can play volleyball with themselves. And they frequently do. Aquarians use the phrase "Dude, man..." frequently when describing philosophical concepts. Aquarians have out-of-body experiences on a daily basis. If you are talking to an Aquarian and he or she zones out, consider the conversation hopeless. He or she is talking to the guy three feet away from you. Aquarians are fun because they channel people. Plus, if you tell them to, they will run around naked. Aquarians like astronomy because they've been to all those places. If you want to know what the food is like on Saturn, ask an Aquarius. They can also walk on water if they try really really hard. This usually happens in the bathtub. Aquarians can allow themselves every possible vice on the planet, and don't think twice about it. That is why they piss everyone else off. They are cosmically entitled to do this. Most rock stars are Aquarians.
Pisces
Everywhere you go, laughter and comedy ensue. This would be great if you were trying to be funny. You are deeply confused by the idea of sex. As far as you are concerned, if it didn't happen in "The Velveteen Rabbit", it doesn't exist. Piscean women wear long floaty dresses and enormous amounts of unusual silver jewelry. On hikes. Pisceans claim to love the stars, but the only constellation they can find is the Big Dipper. If they cannot find it, they cry. You remember what you were wearing on March 3rd, 1981 but forget your own address. You have no sense of direction. The people you find going in reverse at 70 m.p.h. on the expressway are usually Pisceans. Pisceans are most likely to die by falling out of a window or getting run over by a truck. That is, of course, unless they live with a Cancer. Pisceans are so zoned and perpetually endangered that they can bring out the maternal instincts of a Leo. Don't be fooled, however; many Pisceans can surprise you by kicking your ass and the asses of your four imaginary friends. While Leos tend to achieve the most fame in the field of entertainment, Pisceans strive to achieve historical greatness by sheer fluke. They are proud to tell you that Michelangelo, Galileo, George Washington, and Albert Einstein, none of whom had an agent, were all Pisceans. What they won't tell you is that so is Ted Kennedy. Pisceans claim to want "honest criticism" of their work. Then they commit hara-kiri on the floor when you say you don't like it. Never try to use logic with a Pisces; he or she is living about three feet off of the natural ground or in Narnia. Their tools of debate are non-sequiturs, quotes from Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and, of course, crying. It wouldn't matter what linguistic devices Pisceans use to describe philosophical concepts because they aren't positive they know what they're talking about anyway. You cry over dead animals in the road but feel no remorse about mowing down humans you don't like. Cancerians say one thing and do another. Scorpios say one thing and do it just for spite. Pisceans say far too much and do whatever the hell they want.
By the way...I'm Pisces...lol
bright_arrow
06-07-2010, 10:57 PM
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I miss Amethystluv (sp?). Is she here? If not, can somebody kidnap her? :)
tuffboi29
06-07-2010, 11:50 PM
:cheer: I just found Jelly Belly soda...There IS a Higherpower in the universe!
Gemme
06-08-2010, 02:29 AM
I don't like cloak and daggers.
Two things............
I think it's time to get a new phone service....I have Cricket. :| And I've been getting text messages all night long (just got another one from yesterday as I was writing THIS!)...at 3:40, I finally turned off my phone, and dozed off, but THEN...............
Lucy, The WonderDawg, decided she needed to go outside......so up we all got.....went outside.....Coti tinkled 3 times and pooped.
Lucy? Nada.
Now THEY'RE snorin' on the sofa and I'm wide awake!!!!!!!!! :fastdraq:
(That sounds like a bad C&W song, doesn't it?)
NJFemmie
06-08-2010, 06:07 AM
Today is my mom's birthday, she would have been 85.
I keep thinking ... wow... 85 - I wonder what it would be like if she were still around.
IttyBittyFem
06-08-2010, 07:56 AM
In the Dark Ages it was thought that when you sneezed, a brief opportunity for 'devils' to enter your mouth was present, thus explains the origins of 'bless you'.
:blink:
*achoooo*
<waving @ NJ Femmie -(f)
Funny - this topic came up during a perspicacity conversation I was having with a group of folks just the other day.
A Butch (veeeerrrrry handsome I may add) claimed hys grandmother informed hym the heartbeat is some how effected while sneezing, hence, the purpose of God Bless You. (I simply adore cerebral stimulation.)
Has anyone else heard of other 'scientific' (:brainsucker:) explanations?
"God Bless You", directly after a sneeze, has slurred into "Ga Blesh Ya" in my vicinity. Is that just a New York speed talking accent thingey?
IttyBittyFem
06-08-2010, 08:01 AM
I AM
IN LOVE WITH
MALLOMARS
wow. up at 6:30 and into a workout by 7. Now getting ready for a friend coming over for lunch. It's good to get one's ass out of bed and make a productive day of it.
ravfem
06-08-2010, 10:31 AM
Gemini
Everyone loves a Gemini because everyone loves a schizophrenic. You like to think that you are a half-and half mixture of Socrates and Michelangelo, but in reality it's more like Prince and Bea Arthur. You are progressive, outgoing, and one of the most popular rides at Cedar Point. However, you can and will negate all of this by the time you're finished reading this sentence. Geminis drive funny cars. They often drive them into trees or buildings. Geminis are pushy and overbearing. They pick fights with small children and moon people at weddings. They like to use Libras as punching bags. A bisexual Gemini is a walking double date. The rest are hermaphrodites. Geminis vandalize their own houses. Geminis use far-fetched analogies to describe philosophical concepts. Geminis rarely compete in the Olympics. When they do, it is usually pool or air hockey. Frogger turns up as well. Geminis are always on some sort of medication. This medication is not always legal. Gemini is Latin for "I'm okay, I'm okay." Geminis speak very loudly in order to be heard. This is unfortunate as they are nearly always talking to themselves. In fact, they often pick animated arguments with themselves in the bathtub. The most famous Gemini in history is Orville and Wilbur Wright. Geminis are frequently abidextrous, which means that they can pick both sides of their noses at the same time. The Gemini is essentially nothing more than a paranoid Aquarius.
This is by far the BEST description of me that i've ever come across!!
Just_G
06-08-2010, 10:55 AM
So my buddy Cheech came over last night....some of you know of whom I speak....others, not so much. We sat out on the deck drinking beer and shooting the shit about all the times we have gotten together with the fine Butch and Femme folks and had an absolute blast!
We laughed til we were both in tears last night....those are the best boys nights EVER!!
The talk of the upcoming road trip to Little Rock was hysterical...we are SOOO taking the video camera to document this adventure!
UofMfan
06-08-2010, 11:39 AM
I am going to have something other than rice, potatoes, toast, pediayte, soup or crackers for the first time in days. Please everyone keep me in your prayers :blink:
PinkieLee
06-08-2010, 02:42 PM
I am conducting a test to see how many moods I really can hit in a 24 hour period. Consider yourself warned!
Kätzchen
06-08-2010, 02:48 PM
I'm just now having breakfast, feeling wide awake and ready for the day!
Just_G
06-08-2010, 02:49 PM
I am conducting a test to see how many moods I really can hit in a 24 hour period. Consider yourself warned!
Um, this is not in the manual and I have no idea how to handle this particular test.
Do I:
A. put on a helmet and my sequin tube top and sit with my head between my knees?
B. grab a cold Miller Lite and wait it out? (and grab one for you also)
C. skip recklessly down an aisle at the grocery store?
D. open a bottle of Funf?
E. place a shot of Tequila Rose topped off with some Redi Whip between my legs and wait for you while holding a cherry with my mouth?
F. Call Dummy, Stupid, and Nizzle for an intervention?
G. point and giggle?
H. ALL OF THE ABOVE?
You gotta help me out here.....NO MANUAL!! :blink:
(you can choose more than one...just FYI)
PinkieLee
06-08-2010, 02:51 PM
Um, this is not in the manual and I have no idea how to handle this particular test.
Do I:
A. put on a helmet and my sequin tube top and sit with my head between my knees?
B. grab a cold Miller Lite and wait it out? (and grab one for you also)
C. skip recklessly down an aisle at the grocery store?
D. open a bottle of Funf?
E. place a shot of Tequila Rose topped off with some Redi Whip between my legs and wait for you while holding a cherry with my mouth?
F. Call Dummy, Stupid, and Nizzle for an intervention?
G. point and giggle?
H. ALL OF THE ABOVE?
You gotta help me out here.....NO MANUAL!! :blink:
(you can choose more than one...just FYI)
bwahahahahahahahaa.... all of the above suga foot! I fuckin' love you!
**see, that was a lovey dovey AND a laugh out loud mood ~ THANK YOU**
Just_G
06-08-2010, 03:13 PM
bwahahahahahahahaa.... all of the above suga foot! I fuckin' love you!
**see, that was a lovey dovey AND a laugh out loud mood ~ THANK YOU**
There are other choices if you need me to list them for ya! :winky:
I went with my top ten ways to handle a femme emergency....glad you like it!
I promise that one thing NOT on the list is "yap like a yorkie". :blink: I think you have had enough of that already!
PinkieLee
06-08-2010, 03:20 PM
There are other choices if you need me to list them for ya! :winky:
I went with my top ten ways to handle a femme emergency....glad you like it!
I promise that one thing NOT on the list is "yap like a yorkie". :blink: I think you have had enough of that already!
I sure do like your top 10.... I bet you have different top 10's for lots of "other" emergency occassions, too! Yep, I always knew you were a Boy Scout ;)
Thank you for having my back ~ always!
**see, my grateful mood**
ps... this damn Yorkie is 'bout to get it!
BestButchBoy
06-08-2010, 05:32 PM
On a city sidewalk, walk briskly and don’t impede pedestrian traffic.
If you have to stop, move to the side.
Massive
06-08-2010, 10:51 PM
_smKyihbQ3s
Massive
06-08-2010, 10:53 PM
R7_BPXMoJxw&feature=pyv&ad=4790767768&kw=anchor%20milk
Kätzchen
06-09-2010, 12:25 PM
I am by no means "awake" yet - I will be soon though because I said so.
HA!
*I need more coffee*
Um, this is not in the manual and I have no idea how to handle this particular test.
Do I:
A. put on a helmet and my sequin tube top and sit with my head between my knees?
B. grab a cold Miller Lite and wait it out? (and grab one for you also)
C. skip recklessly down an aisle at the grocery store?
D. open a bottle of Funf?
E. place a shot of Tequila Rose topped off with some Redi Whip between my legs and wait for you while holding a cherry with my mouth?
F. Call Dummy, Stupid, and Nizzle for an intervention?
G. point and giggle?
H. ALL OF THE ABOVE?
You gotta help me out here.....NO MANUAL!! :blink:
(you can choose more than one...just FYI)
I vote for "D", of course.
I don't have the energy to do F. Besides, she needs to visit the Quiet Room ANYway.....and Quiet Room #2 (aka: The Red Room).
Always a servant <rolling my eyes>,
The Nizz
PinkieLee
06-09-2010, 01:44 PM
I have the sudden yearning for a yummy Red Velvet Cake made with love by the Divalicious!
Just_G
06-09-2010, 02:00 PM
I have the sudden yearning for a yummy Red Velvet Cake made with love by the Divalicious!
Mmmmmm, cake! A little Funf :wine:....then a nap!! I love when I visit my Nizzle and we take afternoon naps from being up late laughing the night before!! :blink:
PinkieLee
06-09-2010, 02:03 PM
Mmmmmm, cake! A little Funf :wine:....then a nap!! I love when I visit my Nizzle and we take afternoon naps from being up late laughing the night before!! :blink:
AND having coffee (with the best assortment of creamers) on the patio or the Quiet Room early the next morning.
**This must be a Chez Diva & Divalicious fan club**
Enchantress
06-09-2010, 02:52 PM
What I really want is *Turtle* Chex Mix. Instead I'm eating blackberries.
tuffboi29
06-09-2010, 03:11 PM
Whoever invented Arnold Palmer Half & Half Arizona Iced Tea....was a genius.
Random
06-09-2010, 03:29 PM
AND having coffee (with the best assortment of creamers) on the patio or the Quiet Room early the next morning.
**This must be a Chez Diva & Divalicious fan club**
Sigh... the patio.....
sigh....
I swear... by the time we left austin.. I was talked out.. like for realz... I almost took a vow of silence I was so drained...
Mmmmmm, cake! A little Funf :wine:....then a nap!! I love when I visit my Nizzle and we take afternoon naps from being up late laughing the night before!! :blink:
AND having coffee (with the best assortment of creamers) on the patio or the Quiet Room early the next morning.
**This must be a Chez Diva & Divalicious fan club**
Sigh... the patio.....
sigh....
I swear... by the time we left austin.. I was talked out.. like for realz... I almost took a vow of silence I was so drained...
Thanks, Y'all.........
I don't know what it is about that terrace....but it is a relaxing place and encourages conversation.....and calm, too.
The QR's neat, too. :)
I'm sure glad You've had good experiences here...that makes me happy. :rrose:
Is there such a thing as TOO much feta? I mean really?
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